Guys, I am so sorry that this took forever to update! I was trying to get the old geezer of a computer while on vacation to work, but NO. That was just not good enough. Fucking piece of junk.

Anyways, I really hope this can slightly make up for the delay.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. Capiche?

I am done.

Fucking. Done.

You hear that world? HUH? You got that loud and clear. Done with this shit, I am. And if you still haven't gotten it then go check out Yoda, he knows what the hell I mean.

I mean, this is ridiculous. Absolutely freaking ridonkulous and I am done, done, done, done, done, done! I do not need things like this happening to me, I DO NOT.

Not only do I need to be a mind reader, no. That's just not freaky enough, is it? No, I just have to be a bloody singer to a totally hot guy so that he can only think about killing me. I just have to be abnormally fast and have super senses now, too, don't I? Oh and the coup de grace, of course, isn't as merciful as one would like to think. Yes, it fucking blows, and no, it has no mercy. My blood changes in the moonlight, I snarl at people now. I mean I've snarled before, but never really a snarl, snarl. If you know what I mean.

Oh. And I'm pretty sure I'm not a fucking human. Just wanted to get that out there. Just so we're all clear on the fact that I have so much shit up my ass, I'm like a constipation sensation waiting to fucking happen. I kid you not. And that pile of shit is messy and watery and plain out gross in a way that would block up any life shaped toilet in this world. Because we all have toilets representing what our life is like, right?

See what I mean? I'm so different I'm becoming my own species.

Which, surprisingly, does not surprise me. I am surprised that it doesn't surprise me but other than that I'm kind of over it. So over it I've jumped it and am now back to square one, which is under it and looking up at it going what the hell just happened. You know how you get when you think you've accomplished something and find that you've been walking in circles, squares, and triangles all day until you're so dizzy all you can do is fall on your ass and try to not empty your stomach on the Hello Kitty bag you dragged along for the rollercoaster ride. I know I'm not making sense, but you'll just have to deal. Because I myself do not know what the fuck is being spewed from my own mouth.

And that's saying something. Or not saying something and being very, very quiet. See? See?! Circles and conversations in my mind that all lead back to one little destination I like to call 'the universe has fucked you over. Welcome to the land of Irony'. Well, isn't that just hunky dory? I would like to think the fuck not.

Alright, now that I'm done rambling I might as well get to the shittingly fun freaking point. Even though I prefer stalling with utter nonsense. But let's just get to the point. Which is that I am done and done and fucking done times five bazillion. Then again, I really don't have a choice about it.

So I'll just have to deal. Or bitch. Guess which one I'm going for now?

Edward was sitting at the kitchen table and I was across from him. Rosalie was leaning against Emmet who was leaning against the counter, Alice and Jasper were perched on a chair. I mean, he's on the chair and she's on him. Oh and Carlisle and Esme are holding hands and looking from the glorious moon to glorious Edward to plain old abnormal me. And you know what?

I was feeling pretty sucky. Not just for me, but for Edward.

God it must suck being the seventh wheel for like three hundred years. I would go insane. Or more insane. I know, impossible right?

But then again, I was just a teensy tiny little bit kind of happy because, well…hotness personified/sexiness on legs in the chair across from me didn't have a lady friend. Meaning he's available. And so am I. So two available people in a room full of unavailable people? And the fact that one of us two is attracted to the other is a half win. Now a whole win would be if I could try out something, I don't know, seductive and maybe kind of feel up his bicep while I'm doing it and maybe get a little signal as to what's going on in his head…

Disregarding the fact that it won't ever happen seeing as a. he wants to eat me in a non-sexual way, b. I have no seductive abilities whatsofuckingever, c. he would know what the hell was going on if I did try to touch him because I am damn freaking obvious, and d. he is hot and I am not.

But a girl can still dream. Frequently and elaborately when in present company.

But gah, having him so close and knowing that I don't really appeal to him in a food way at the moment is driving me crazy. If I thought he was beautiful before, I'm dumbstruck right now. I could see the green waves in his eyes, the bronze mess on his head, and his drop dead berry lips. He had a flush in his cheeks that just outlined how alive he was and emphasized his cheekbones in a way that would make any Cover girl lackey jealous. And that jaw line. My gawd, I've died and gone to heaven and I am not coming back. I could probably look at this guy forever and I would still not be used to it.

Plus my salivary glands would probably shiver up and die screaming because of the ocean of drool they'd produced.

Oh, and it would be great to stare at Edward. You know, if a certain pixie person wasn't looking at me with a suspicious gleam in her eyes. And if a certain Adonis wasn't shifting around uncomfortably.

Because I was ogling him again. And he was obviously a little bit freaked out. But he didn't get out of his chair or glare at me or anything like that, so he wasn't too uncomfortable. I hope.

Every once in a while he would look up, and I would gaze, yes gaze, into his gorgeously amazing eyes that were the exact color of a snake's scales and I would be lost. They would glitter and simmer and melt me away to my core and I would float in the ocean they provided for me. Sea green, forest green, emerald green, jade, moss, lime, myrtle. There weren't enough shades or options in the color of green to describe his eyes. And they were probably the part of him I loved most. You know how they say you can see someone's soul in their eyes?

Well I was starting to believe it. Because I could see his soul and it was so pretty I wanted to hug it. How could he not think he has a soul? Has he never looked in a mirror or is he just completely oblivious?

Edward pursed his lips and looked at me again. We stared at each other and I blushed what I'm sure was a shade of absolute unhealthiness, but I didn't look away. I couldn't. He looked like he wanted to say something, like he needed to say something. He opened his mouth and then those eyes of his fogged over, a mist rolling over the oceans, and his mouth slowly shut again. But he didn't look away.

I felt a crackling, an electric current between us. It seemed to flow and wave its way back and forth and I could see him lean forward just the tiniest bit. But I was leaning closer too, I needed to get closer. I felt this magnetic draw to the boy across from me. Maybe it was moon that was making me so out of sorts.

And then I wasn't leaning towards Edward anymore. I was leaning awkwardly to the left, towards the sliding door. Because that current of connectedness I'd just felt was switching its course and pulling me to something as gorgeous as Edward at the moment, the moon. I resisted, and I managed to stay in my seat for point two seconds before I was up and barreling towards it again. Just a little bit more-

Slam. Something warm and firm was holding me by the waist. I struggled against it kicked at the shins behind me, beat uselessly at the arms holding me captive. But nothing worked and through the haze that consumed me, I could hear the sweet urgent thoughts those arms induced.

Calm yourself Isabella. Breathe in, out, in, out. Control yourself and your desires. I'll bring you closer to the moon if you will just calm yourself.

An image of myself at that moment in time flashed through Edward's mind. My eyes were crazed, my body tense and squirming, gaze locked on the silver pool of light on the tiled floor. The shock of seeing myself them half woke me up. Then another image, me tensing and launching myself out of my chair with almost demonic speed. Is that me? Is that what I looked like?

A shudder ran through me and I relaxed. But as I softened I could feel the body behind me harden, every delicious muscle of Edward's locking in place as my curves melted to fit the planes of his body. And for a second I could feel a hesitation around him, a sort of longing.

Is this how it feels to-

But then his body was gone, our contact severed as he stepped abruptly away. The warmth of his arms around me, the protectiveness of his embrace, the sweet melody of his thoughts, all were gone and I felt cut off and cold.

But that current of electricity between us crackled to life again, thrumming and pulsing in the light of the moon.

The room was quiet, all shushed whispers and murmured conversations silenced when I first jumped from the chair. And then all eyes on us were curious, questioning as Edward and I blushed simultaneously and looked away from each other in an awkward manner.

I glanced to the right and there again was Alice, a purely predatory grin gracing her features.

Well. That can't be good.

I was having the stirrings of another internal panic attack. Edward was beautiful, sure, but nobody had ever caused these kinds of reactions in me. This longing, comfort, desire, obsession that I felt in his presence was a novelty thing. I mean, I'd had crushes before, I'd even had one boyfriend when I went on vacation to Florida for one summer. He hadn't known me, and he thought I was cute. I thought he was cute. He brought me out some times and after our third date I could feel uneasiness rolling off of him in waves. When I touched his arm I could no longer feel contentment, or a desire. I could only get the feeling that he was wary of me and the strangeness I radiated. I broke it off with him the next day. So maybe boyfriend was stretching it a bit.

So I'd definitely felt attracted to people, and people had been attracted to me. I mean, I'm not ugly. The guys back in Phoenix even thought I was kind of hot, they just knew that I was a freak. A hot freak, but still a freak.

But this attraction, this pull I had towards Edward? I'd never felt that towards anyone before. And frankly, it scared the ever-loving bejezus out of me.

But before I could hop on the crazy train for another ride, Carlisle and Esme were in front of me and then past me. They gave me one wary glance and then they were talking in whispers to Edward with a 'what the hell was that all about?' look on their faces. The parental concern just radiated off of them. Gosh, I wish Renee was so nice and concerned like them, I mean seriously. Does she have not one bone of maternity in her body? Charlie's more motherly to me than-

"Charlie!" My voice was high pitched and slightly hysterical. Oh gosh, what would he think? He's the police chief so he could probably just send out a search party! And it was like nine at night now, and holy shit… my car. It's been in the parking lot and what if they left my bag out there or if someone found the cloth with whateverthehell was on it and they assume the worst, kidnapping, which is actually the truth… but the Cullens are just slightly crazy and can't be all normal about kidnapping me in a conscious state, they just wanted some answers! I mean, they're completely innocent, well maybe not, but, well, you know what I mean. And, and, and-

Oh what the hell! I am soo much shit right now I'm practically eating it.

Alice yawned and shook her spiky head. Jasper's eyes were just the tiniest bit crazed, he was obviously feeling my panic. Rosalie and Emmet were completely ignoring me and talking in hushed whispers about something that I probably would not want to know about. The only people who had taken note of my outburst were Carlisle, Esme, and Edward. But Edward was looking at Alice and he didn't seem panicky, just kind of pissed off in a mouth-watering way (hormones, need I say more?), Carlisle and Esme however were very panicky.

"Wait, what? Alice what is going on and what were the mechanics of your kidnapping scheme, I need to talk to you later about that, and this is the Police Chief's daughter your holding captive. You know the guy, with all the dogs and things that will find us and make us responsible for this." Carlisle did not look happy. Well now he knew how I felt.

Alice yawned again and then went on in a bored tone that just slightly pissed me off, "Well how stupid do you think I am? Of course I anticipated what would happen if we kidnapped Bella here, even though she seems to block off a helluva lot of my visions," she glared at me again. It is not my fault. I can't help it. Get it through your head you evil Tinker Bell thing.

"So when we uh, collected Bella, I had Em drive her truck over here, it's in the driveway as we speak but I don't advise Bella to look out the window. You know, seeing as she has that whole moon-complex. And I called Charlie telling him something along the lines of 'Hi, Mr. Swan, I was just wondering if Bella could stay the night at my house? This is Alice Cullen by the way. I'm a friend of Bella's and I offered to let her come over, since it's a Friday and all, but she was too shy to ask. You know how she is. And she's inside getting all her stuff together, so is it okay? I would really, really appreciate it and Bella will have so much fun,'" her voice was so sweet and sincere, I almost believed it. Charlie didn't have a chance.

Alice was smirking now, "Well it worked brilliantly. He said it was fine and that she could stay the whole weekend if she liked. So we've got nothing to worry about." Everyone sighed in relief. Everyone but me.

"Um, yeah. So I have to stay the night? Possibly the weekend, here? You all do know that there is a very likely chance that Edward's going to think of me as an appetizer again by the time the moon sinks. Because I don't want to be an appetizer exactly. And I'm not so sure about sleeping in the shed either." That got their attention. Not the shed part, the Edward part. Sigh, can I blame them? Who would you rather be distracted by?

And there I go again. Attempting and failing to not stare at the piece of fuckhawtness at the table. But Fiddlesticks! He was just too… too exotic I guess. He was beautiful and he was weird.

And having someone so physically attractive with about the same wavelength of 'different' in the same room as me was making my body go absolutely insane. I turned when I heard a cough and blushed when I saw Jasper shifting around and glaring at me. I shrugged and mouthed a mortified 'sorry' before turning again. And there was Alice.

Looking for all the world like Sylvester with Tweety in his paws. Shit, shit, shit. And I had the feeling that I was Tweety in this scenario.

"Bell-uh," she sung in my direction, "I've got a surprise for you!" I shook my head back and forth. The universal sign for NO THANKS. I hate surprises.

But apparently, Alice was either not trained in universal language, or she just didn't give a fuck. I'm going for the doesn't give a fuck angle.

My arm was in her vice like grip in 0.2 seconds and I was being dragged, once again, by someone only half my size. Up the stairs. Towards a door with a big sparkly sign saying 'ALICE' on it with small cursive letters spelling 'Jasper' beneath. Oh hell.

Oooo I know you can read my mind right now, but I've got a few tricks up my sleeve. I've been around Edward for a while now so I think you can imagine that I've had a lot of training in the art of silence.

Old McDonald had a farm, e-i-e-i-o and on that farm he had a-

Lovely. How sophisticated of her. She says she's good at being silent; I say she's a master at being so annoying that you can't help but block out whatever the hell she's saying (or thinking, whatever floats your boat).

She opened the door, which was creaking ominously, and pulled me in. And I was fucking blinded.

On every side of the room there was pink and purple and black and orange and red and blue and yellow and every single one of the colors of the fucking rainbow splattered in a mess of rainbow puke all over the walls. Seriously, it looked like strawberry shortcake and all her berry-special friends had vomited whatever the fuck they were growing in here.

Not to say that it didn't have style. Just…not a style I could exactly appreciate or ever really relate to.

There was a king bed in the middle of the room, covered in a mountain of fluffy pillows and patchy-fashionista blankets. The carpet was a shag, haha shag, and thinking that word is getting me nowhere so moving on. Anyways, the deep lilac shag carpet (tehe) covered the entire floor. This motherfucker was huge. And this room was huge.

There were a pair of French doors leading out to a porch thing, although I couldn't really see it from here what with me not supposed to be looking out windows and such. There was a freaking lipstick kiss studded fucking vanity in the corner of the everloving room. Really? I mean, what the hell…she's a freak and she still has the teenage stereotypical mirror vanity thing. And she's not really a teenager. She's a mature six hundred something Hybrid vampire-human. That's as far from the word stereotypical as you can fucking get.

Well, maybe not. I'm the farthest from stereotypical. But yeah anyways…

There were two doors leading out of the room, one on the far left and one on the far right. The left one was opened and I walked forward to see what the hell was residing in their, if not a caged parakeet or something similar.

"Oh that's the closet and the other's the bathroom," Alice's airy voice drifted ahead of me as I poked my head in and fumbled around for a switch. I flipped the chunky thing and the room was flooded with a pinkish light.

Or should I say the fucking house was flooded with Pepto-Bismol lighting.

Mothereffort and all that the ducks have shitted while flying. That 'room' was bigger than well…bigger than any closet I had ever lived to see.

I could barely see the far wall. Yeah, that's how bad it was.

And there were clothes upon clothes upon shoes upon accessories upon what the hell I can't even describe how much shit was in that closet.

"Impressive, isn't it?" Alice had followed me in and was leaning against the door as casual as a cat.

"Um yeah, it's impressively big. How the hell did you…" I let my question die on my lips because she was looking at me with that gleam in her eyes again. Uh-oh, this can't be good.

She motioned that we move out of the closet and then she beckoned me out of the French doors. We were on a little veranda with a rose covered roof and expensive looking Venetian chairs around a glass table inlaid with pictures of forests and fairies. A scattering of colored lamps hung from the ceiling and illuminated the space with a mystical light. And above it all, the moon danced silently in the sky, it's silvery sheen beckoning me.

Where? I wasn't really sure.

"You seem to have better control over your…emotions now. An hour ago you were nearly frothing at the mouth and jumping out the window," I turned to the Pixie girl. Her tone was musing, curious as she observed me.

"I wonder what else you can do," She let the statement hang in the night air, suspended between us. I wondered too. She shook her head, took a deep breath, and smiled at me.

"Alright Bella, I have an idea. I want you to look at the moon. Tell me how you feel when you stand in its light," I stared at her quizzically. But I listened anyways. I turned my face into the light and gazed. The moon seemed to pulse with light, and suddenly, the light wasn't only silver. On the fringes were a spectrum of colors that moved as sinuously as waves in the ocean. They flowed into each other and formed a pulsing ball of light hovering on the edges of the silver falling to earth.

"The light isn't so silver now, it has a…rainbow of colors just hovering on its edges and dancing around it. The moon itself is surrounded by the ring of colors. I can feel the light right now, I can taste it on my tongue almost, like honey. It's energy is just…seeping into me. Like I'm absorbing its power, its strength," I closed my eyes dreamily. You know how people 'soak up the sun' the warmth of the daylight? That's how I felt right then but it was stronger. It was like slowly sliding into a warm bath with the steam rising to pillow on your cheek. Like walking into the shade after a long day in the sun. And I could feel my body strengthening, my muscles tensing like they were ready to spring at the slightest touch.

I opened my eyes and turned to Alice, a huge content smile on my face. And she gasped.

"Your eyes! They're swirling!" She plunged her hand into her pocket and pulled out a make-up mirror. Then she held it up to me.

My eyes were no longer brown. They were a sea of chocolate and amber and honey; of mahogany and coffee and mud. And the edges were tinted silver just like the moon.

They were beautiful.

I'd never liked my eyes, I always thought they were boring and plain. But looking at them now, well… I was kind of hoping Edward could fawn over them the way I was. Really, they were almost as nice as his eyes. And that's saying something.

"Huh- what the…How?" I was stumbling and stuttering over my words, wondering what the hell was going on. It was freaky yes. But I liked it. I liked my eyes this way. Or maybe that was the moon talking.

I looked away from the mirror and up at Alice. But she wasn't even paying attention. Her eyes had a dreamy unfocused look to them and she was looking right at me- but not right at me. Like her eyes were trained on my face but she seemed to be seeing something far away. Then, suddenly, she grabbed my arm. And a flood of images flew into my mind.

A girl, brown hair, a swirl of chocolate and silver eyes. She was standing in a pool of moonlight, the air swirling her hair around her shoulders. Her eyes were closed and her face was turned towards the sky where the moon held domain. She opened her eyes and moved forward, but so fast that it was barely made out. She stood on a veranda at least two stories above the ground, but she leaped up onto the railing anyway. She looked up one more time and then went sailing into the air. She seemed to fly before she came falling down, ever so slowly. And she landed with only the lightest of touches on the grassy ground. Then she went running, loping after a small spiky-haired figure that was fast disappearing into the trees.

I let go of Alice's arm and we both stared at each other with no less the bland shock on both of our faces. And then her lightning blue eyes took on a steely, determined look. She set her mouth turned and jumped from the veranda into the night towards the trees I had seen only moments ago. As I watched her fly up into the inky dark, I caught sight, once again, of the moon. I felt its strength flow into me as I recalled the image of the girl on the veranda in Alice's vision.

Me.

I let the breeze flow around my body as I let the strength of the moon flow into me. I took a deep breath, opened my eyes, and let those tightly coiled muscles bunch together as I leaped to the railing. I looked up one more time and then I, too, was sailing through the air. I was so high up and so unafraid.

I had never, in all my years of living, felt so completely and incomparably alive. Every breath and I could feel the sweet air flow through my body, along with the slivers of light still illuminating the sky I was soaring through. Then I was coming down, ever so slowly, until I touched the ground at least twenty feet away from the house. But I didn't feel a thing, just the grass beneath my shoeless feet. And then I was running, zipping across the yard towards the Pixie who was already in the forest. I ran and I ran and I ran until I was caught up with her, and then ahead of her. And then I was breaking from the trees after who knows how long and a small clearing was before me.

I was not tired.

Alice came up behind me and danced around me, laughing triumphantly, "I saw you! I saw you! I saw you!" she sung it to the trees and to the sleeping birds and to the world as the moon looked down on us from overhead.

"I saw you, Bella, I saw you! In a vision, I saw you!" And she stopped and we stared and then we were both of us smiling because we were happy. For no real reason, we were happy.

And we laughed.

She saw me. So we were happy.

And above us, the moon was setting as the night faded away.

Let's keep with the program people.

Review if you're happy that I am alive and able to write things that don't make any sense.