We reached 100 followers! Wiiii :) Thank all of you!
Em, I don't know if I'll be able to update weekly since I'm starting with my exams' period so I don't know when I'll have time to write, I'll do my best.
Nothing else to say :)
Richard Castle walked down the empty and dark hallways with his belongings stored in a suitcase; he always complained about how depressing they were, but now he felt like they identified him. They were a part of his life, unlit and desolated; they reflected all those years he had been in here.
The writer continued walking with a confident air. He had dreamed of this day since day one. None of the other patients came to say bye, but truth was that Castle didn't have friends in the institution. First he had been reclusive, avoiding all possible contact with others since he believed they were all part of a big plot against him and Nikki. Later, when he started the treatment he didn't have time to socialize as he was too busy trying to get back to his real life.
Alexis was waiting for him at the entrance to the institution, looking radiant. Tired, but radiant. She was definitely proud of her father.
After five years of ups and downs, of medications and treatments, of being constantly drugged against or under his consent, he was able to go home. Richard couldn't remember the last time he had felt so excited.
The writer reached the doorway, where he hesitated. Castle hadn't been in the outside world except for that lunch he had had with his daughter and mother a couple of months ago. But that was a completely different situation, because he had returned after the lunch to the mental hospital; now he wouldn't come back to his comfort zone. He would have to stay out in the cold and lonely world.
"I - I can't do it," he whispered full of trepidation. Alexis looked at him sympathetically.
"Dad, I know it must be scary," she said walking towards him to lay a comforting hand on his arm. "But I also know that this is something you have wanted for a long time."
"I don't want it anymore," Castle held his suitcase tight to his chest, squeezing his eyes shut.
"C'mon, Dad." Alexis grabbed his arm. "You'll have to get used to the world again sooner or later."
But Castle didn't move, even when Alexis pulled him gently. The fear had paralyzed him. His sight was fixed on the horizon and his thoughts were elsewhere. Why hadn't he thought about this before? No, he couldn't do it. The institution was part of him, and he was part of the institution. He panicked a little bit as the anxiety started to grow in his body. All the excitement he had felt before turned into fear. Fear of the unknown, fear to face the changes, fear of life.
"Dad, do you want to stay?" Alexis asked, watching him carefully. He let out a breath, focussing on her face, concern radiating off her. "If you stay, you can't see Grams. You can't see Kate. You want to see Kate, don't you, Dad?" Castle gave a small nod.
Kate. The reason why the time passed faster, the reason why the last weeks had felt like a day.
He met Alexis's unwavering gaze. Kate was out there, in the real world, the world that scared him so much. She could be his solid ground, his north star, his guide in the dangers ahead. She had been so good to him while he was in the institute, why would it be different now that he was out?
His heart had been numb for so long, but when Kate was around he could feel it begin to beat again.
Castle's arms relaxed and he started to walk slowly towards the car. The light – the real, warm, no longer artificial light – made him squint as he followed his daughter. Alexis grabbed the suitcase and put it in the backseat of the car while Castle made himself comfortable in the passenger seat.
"So," Alexis said once she was inside the car. "Are we really doing this?" Castle nodded and a smiled appeared on his daughter's face.
Alexis started the engine without a second thought and drove towards the exit. The redhead waved at the gatekeeper and drove out of the institution, his house for the past five years. He turned around to see the mental hospital for a last time. Even if he had to come back for weekly check-ups, he felt like a new person.
Richard Castle was a free man. He could hardly believe it.
Johnny Cash was playing on the radio. The perfect soundtrack to the start of his new life. He opened the window and felt the wind on his face. He was done being the lonely soul that was part of the old Rick.
Maybe there was a hope for him. Maybe he could do this. Maybe the world would wait as he found his feet. His life was much better, and it had only just begun.