AN: Review or PM me any ideas you might have. No gurantess I'll do it, but if I like it enough then I probably will! Can include pairings.
Plot: Barricade licks back.
Stuck on You cont.
Barricade was seriously beginning to regret ever allowing himself to sink low enough to join the Autobot cause. And those fragging Autobots weren't doing anything about it. They were laughing at him whenever it happened, and a few were even encouraging the annoying organics.
All of the organics on base, which was a small number of four most of the time, had licked him. Epps and Fig did it the most, then Sam, and then finally Will. It seemed to be a game to the organics, one that was seriously pissing the ex-Decepticon off. Any time he'd pass a set of them when there was at least two he was sure to be licked. Usually there was at least three or four of them, which meant he could be licked more than once while the others laughed.
The ex-con was seriously beginning to hate anything to do with the word tongue, tongues, licking, lick, or even taste. When he stormed into Optimus Prime's designated office, the Prime didn't even look up. As if he was expecting Barricade to snap and come see him. The glitch.
"Are you really just going to let them do this to me?" Barricade growled.
Optimus glanced up at him, "They're just having a bit of fun, Barricade. It's either this or they stay terrified of you. They have to make you seem normal, like us."
"So that's a no?" Barricade glared at the Prime, "You're really just going to sit there and let them lick me!"
"It doesn't hurt you, and it doesn't hurt them. You know better than to do anything in retaliation that would harm them in anyway." If Optimus hadn't had his facemask down Barricade would have thought the Prime was smirking, "Which is probably why you haven't done anything yet."
Barricade snarled, two could play at this game.
"Would you allow them to do this to one of your Autobots?"
"Only myself and Ratchet have been spared. Bumblebee was the first to be licked, and Epps got Ironhide a week ago when he was overly intoxicated."
Slag. "And does your Weapons Specialist know that it's your fault he blew a few circuits over that song? What was it called again? Ah, yes, the Song that Never Ends."
"I assure you I do not know what you mean." Optimus' optics glinted in amusement.
"You asked Samuel to download something for you, something that any of the organics on base could have gotten you. His organic friend conveniently borrowed and hacked his laptop just before he was set to come here." Barricade raised an optic ridge, smirking.
"Do you have any proof of these accusations?"
Barricade didn't have to say no, the Prime already knew that.
"No proof, then?" The smirk was evident in the Prime's voice. "Besides, how could I be in touch with Samuel's friend without anyone knowing? If you're going to try to blackmail me at least make sure you can, Barricade. I'm almost disappointed."
It was only natural that after Miles let the others know that he knew the little government secret the teen would be shipped to base to get to meet everyone. And answer any questions Will might have had for him, since the army Captain was stuck with the paperwork that had to do with another organic knowing about the Cybertronians.
Sam was thrilled, and Bumblebee was, too. The Scout had never actually gotten to talk to Miles face to face even with all the time he spent around the teen. So he grasped the opportunity while he and Sam showed Miles around base, introducing him to the Autobots and organic soldiers as they came along them.
When they came across Barricade Epps and Fig had decided to tag along. Miles walked up to the ex-con and tilted his head back to look up at him, glancing along his frame. He smiled apologetically.
"You're the one I licked, right? Sorry about that."
Epps smirked, "Oh, don't worry, Miles. Barricade loves being licked."
"Excuse me?" Miles asked in confusion, obviously not thinking that anybot would enjoy being licked.
Barricade growled, optics flying to Epps and keeping the organic locked in his gaze. But that gave Fig an opening, the Spanish speaking soldier darting in and licking him while Bumblebee snickered.
Barricade snapped, "The next organic who licks me is going to get squashed! Frag the cleanup and any complaints the Autobots have they can shove up their tailpipes!"
Unfortunately this threat had no effect on the organics whatsoever, Sam, Epps, and Fig bursting out laughing while Miles just watched with wide eyes. The ex-con snarled, transforming into his alt mode and just racing away from the group. Bumblebee was torn between laughing along or pitying his fellow Cybertronian. He was just glad that the organics weren't doing it to him.
After Fig had licked Barricade and the ex-con had snapped, Miles found him in his recharge hangar. He walked in, barely glancing around, and sidled right up to the Cybertronian. Barricade watched him warily, half convinced that the young organic would lick him again. He was paranoid, but he couldn't be blamed for that.
"They keep licking you?" Miles sounded amused. "Then lick back."
Barricade shuttered his optics, "Lick back?"
"You can make a holoform like Bee's, right? So that includes a tongue. If you grab someone and lick them in front of the others then I guarantee that's going to stop them." Miles smirked, as if it was that simple.
"Who do you suggest I lick, then?"
"Sam. He's the one who told me to lick you, right?"
Barricade pulled up to a spot on the open tarmac where Bumblebee was currently receiving a car wash. The Autobot Scout was in his alt mode to make it easier on the four organics washing him. Epps was washing his hood, Will was washing his trunk, and Sam and Fig were washing Bumblebee's sides. Miles climbed out of Barricade quickly, going towards the others.
Epps smirked at Barricade, "Well look who came back. Want more that badly?"
Barricade ignored Epps completely. Perhaps if the soldier had been working on the trunk or sides he would have gone for him instead of Sam, but the hood was further away. He got out his holoform and walked over to the young organic who had killed his old leader, the leader of the Decepticons. Now they were on the same side.
And now he was grabbing Sam by his shoulders, pulling him close and licking from the bottom of one cheek to his forehead.
Sam yelped, jerking away and looking absolutely horrified, rubbing at the side of his face. Miles snickered while the three organic soldiers watched with wide eyes, and Bumblebee pulled out his own holoform, pulling Sam close to him and looking at Barricade in amusement.
"Now your Charge won't tell people to lick me anymore, or lick me himself. He started it, so it'll end with him." Barricade said with a shrug.
Bumblebee glanced behind Barricade at Miles, before looking back at the used to be Decepticon's holoform. "Didn't Miles tell you? He's the one that started it all. During the time of the frozen water he dared Sam to lick me so his tongue got stuck on my metal. It was what made Sam dare him to lick you later on."
Miles grin quickly faded as Barricade turned around to face him, and he started to whistle innocently. Barricade knew the young organic was smart already, had to be if he could hack into Sam's laptop like he had before, but he hadn't thought Miles was this smart. Miles got even more payback against Sam by getting his friend licked, and he ensured his own safety from being the one who Barricade licked at the same time. There was really only one way you could lick a person in holoform and have it be a surprise. Afterwards it would never be as surprising. But Barricade did have a trump card.
"You realize we have a tongue in our bipedal modes too, right?" Barricade's holoform dissolved as he transformed into his bipedal mode, baring his teeth as if to emphasize his statement. "We refer to them as a glossa instead of a tongue, though."
Miles eyes widened, and Barricade smirked, quickly sticking out his glossa so the organic had a glimpse of it before putting it away again. The threat of still being licked would teach the little glitch to try and use Barricade as one of his pawns. But when Miles smirked again, Barricade knew that this was one organic he could not afford to underestimate. It would come back to bite him in the aft, he was sure of it.
"The only way you're going to lick me with that tongue is if we're in private quarters, and I get to decide where." Miles said, close to a purr.
Barricade shuttered his optics, taken aback. The little glitch was flirting with him. He had no idea what to use as a retort, and Miles was counting on that. From his right he could hear Sam make a horrified sound, looking even more horrified than he had when Barricade used his holoform to lick him. Not only had Miles bested him in their little revenge match, but he also had possibly scarred his best friend for life.
"No, no, no!" Sam cried, "Bee, you can't let Barricade anywhere near Miles!"
Miles winked at Barricade before turning to his friend, "But Sam, you enjoy it whenever Bee licks you. Maybe I want to enjoy being licked."
Sam made an odd noise, something close to an embarrassed squawk, as Bumblebee's holoform started to laugh behind him, along with Epps and Fig. Barricade wondered when he'd lost control of the situation before realizing that Miles had been the one in control all along, and started thinking of how to get him back.
"Somehow I get the feeling that you're all closet perverts and I need to watch my ass." Will commented dryly, expression exasperated. Epps waggled his eyebrows, smacking the Captain on his ass and receiving a punch on the shoulder for his trouble.
"Well, as fun as this is, I hacked the speakers in Ironhide's room to play the Song that Never Ends. I'm gonna go get killed by him before Barricade can lick me. Toodles!" And with a smirk Miles jogged away.
If nothing else at least his stay with the Autobots will be interesting, Barricade thought. And maybe now he'd stop being licked.