Chapter 10

Yayyy! Chapter 10! :)

No One's POV

Jade sat in the corner of Tori's bathroom in the hallway of her house, curled in a ball with her back to the wall. She was supposed to be getting dressed for Cat's funeral, but she was dying inside and didn't have the energy. She still ate the same amount, she never slept, and she never changed out of her pajamas and just listened to music.

She lifted her head up and stared at the lace black dress lying on Tori's counter, along with her big black lace makeup box and her favorite perfume, Forbidden Rose by Avril Lavigne. Lying on her dress was her toothbrush, hair curler, hair brush and black heels. Her eyes drooped into her deep purple bags from sleepless nights and her tangled hair reminded her of a rat's nest.

"Jade?" She heard Tori from the other side of the door, knocking lightly. "Jade, are you dressed?" Tori just walked right on in, knowing Jade wasn't going to answer. Jade hid herself back in her arms and knees when Tori sighed.

"Beck!" Tori shrieks. "I need help! Jade hasn't done a thing!" Jade would at least brush her teeth and hair if she had the strength and energy. She just wouldn't give her legs a try because she knew she would plummet to the floor.

"C'mere, Jade," Beck sighs, gathering Jade's broken body in her arms and setting her on his lap. She hid her face in his neck and he let his arms wrap loosely around her waist, casually rubbing her side with his thumb. He rested his cheek on her head, closing his eyes.

"Why does she get special attention?!" Tori suddenly shouts, making Jade jump and lift her head up, sinking farther into Beck. Jade was too sensitive and fragile right now, so the shouting scared her. "She's not the only one who lost a friend! Cat was my friend too! She's being a baby!"

"Would you quit being such a bitch to her?" Beck sighs, closing his eyes again and rubbing his forehead. "You're making things worse."

"Things are already at their worst," Tori grumbles, stomping out of the bathroom and closing the door behind her.

"I don't want to go," Jade squeaks out, coughing.

"I know," Beck says softly. "But you really need to."

"I don't feel right," Jade says. "I don't want to eat, I don't want to sleep, I don't want to shower and all I wanna do is cry."

"It's called depression," Beck says. "You'll probably feel like that for a while." Jade didn't say anything after that. Eventually Beck coaxed her into the dress and brushes her hair and her teeth, though it was a challenge.

"Um, I don't know how to curl hair or do makeup, so," Beck says to Jade as they stand in front of the mirror.

"I'm not 5," she snaps, but a smile is plastered on her face. And Beck explodes with happiness, feeling like he's on top of the world. He made her smile. He simply kisses her forehead with a big toothy grin on his face before walking out, shutting the door behind him.

"Andre! I got her to smile!" Beck yells happily, running up the stairs to Andre. Jade just keeps smiling as she curls her hair piece by piece and applies her makeup tube by tube and brush by brush.

XXXXXXXXXXX

As they almost open the doors to the church where Cat's funeral is being held, Jade tightens her grip on Beck's arm, stopping in her tracks.

"I can't go in there," she breathes, feeling her chest constrict around her. "I can't."

"Yeah, you're the cause of her death. No wonder why you can't go in there," Tori snorts through her sniffs and sobs. Jade suddenly took off into the woods, not looking back. She slows down enough to take off her black high heels and throw them behind her, not caring where they land. Her black leather jacket flaps in the wind as she starts to breathe heavily, hot tears in her eyes.

She finally trips and catches herself by her hands just in time, making her stop. She had been running for at least ten minutes straight and now she was standing on the edge of a small bridge with no cars speeding down it. Her heart pounded as she continued thinking about jumping off the bridge and plummeting to her death. Right when she was about to throw herself over, a voice and a pair of arms stopped her.

"JADE!" Beck screams, locking his arms around her waist and lifting her back over the ledge. She grimaced knowing what she was in for. A lecture, a scream, maybe a slap back into reality. She was hoping Beck wouldn't stoop as low as hitting her.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" He yells his voice cracking. "You think you can just jump off a bridge and no one care about what happens to you?!" She avoids looking into his watery, bloodshot eyes and closes her eyes.

"Don't hit me," she whispers. "Look, I know what I tried to do was wrong, but please. Just don't hit me."

"Jade," he says softly. "I'm not going to hit you. I would never hit you. But please don't try to pull something like this again." Her head snaps up and through her tears, she glares daggers at him

"No one gives a damn what happens to me," she says harshly. "No one ever has and no one ever will. So don't act like you care, be-"

He cuts her off by kissing her. And it wasn't a soft, gentle kiss. He kissed her with force and he kissed her hard. Jade kisses him back for a few seconds, but them smacks her hands on his chest, pushing him away.

"I don't love you!" She shouts, lying through her teeth. She honestly doesn't know why she just did that. Maybe she was just frustrated with things or something. But the pained look on his face made her hate herself even more than she already did.

"Beck," she says. "I-I…" but she couldn't form a simple sentence. She never felt so angry with herself before. But Beck did nothing except walk back towards the funeral, leaving Jade to cry alone.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Beck and Jade haven't spoken for weeks. Neither of them planned on ever talking again. Jade never snapped at anyone anymore. Beck never stood up for her anymore. Things just weren't right between them. And everything was beyond repair in their minds.

As Jade dragged herself into Hollywood Arts, something felt different. It didn't feel like the home of depression anymore. And today, she noticed, Beck thought enough to change out of his pajamas and into a pair of dark washed jeans, combat boots, grey tank top, red and black flannel shirt and his black jacket. Not to mention their promise ring necklace chained around his neck, along with their lock and key necklace and his J necklace.

Jade raised an eyebrow, but she didn't have the energy to go over there and confront him about him. Instead, she slowly slugged over to her locker and put her books for 1st period in her bag. She looked down at her outfit, feeling like a slob. All she was wearing was a blue shirt, her black leather jacket, black leggings and black combat boots. Her hair was its natural wavy, curly way and all the makeup she was wearing was mascara and Chap Stick. She figured she would stab her eye out if she tried to do her eyeliner and eye shadow.

She thought it was pointless to go to her classes now. She never talked to anyone, when she was called on in class she never responded, she moved her seats in her classes to the very back and she always sat alone at lunch now. No one bothered to talk to her, anyway. Well, besides the bullies here taunted her, laughed at her, made fun of her and sometimes put their hands on her, which she didn't like at all.

"Hey Jade," Robbie says, smiling to her as he opens his locker. Jade seemed foreign to someone actually being nice to her now.

"Um," she stammers, feeling left out for not knowing what was going on. Why was he being so nice to her?

"Your friend is back," he says simply before walking back over to Tori, Andre and Beck. They were all talking and laughing, making Jade feel so out of place and unwanted. They seemed perfectly fine without the bitch of the group. They probably all were. But what friend? She doesn't have any, not to mention she doesn't remember a friend leaving. She cautiously walked up to Robbie, wanting answers. All of their chattering and chuckling stopped when she approached.

"Hey Jade," Robbie smiles to her again. But no one else said anything to her. She quickly disregarded it and kept her focus on one thing.

"Um, what friend are you talking about?" She asks. "I don't have any."

"Guys, c'mon!" Tori says excitedly, looking up from her phone. "She's waiting for us!" They all left Jade in the dust and she watched as they all turned the corner, talking and laughing like nothing just happened.

"Robbie!" Jade yells, following them through the hallways. "Robbie I know you hear me!" But as they reach their destination, which is in front of Lane's office, Jade freezes, her eyes about to bug out of her head.

That vibrant red hair was unmistakable.