A/N: Wow, my life is hellish for the moment. I just got internet back, my gradpa is dead, all my friends sre moving out of state for college, and I found out that I have to be a student or I'm not on my parents insurance after my 18th birthday. In two days. Given that I have three chronic, incurable [but not deadly], and expensive medical conditions that makes a wee bit of a problem for my gap semester... Okay, done with the self pity and blantant ploys for sympathy. The upside of the long break is five new chapters for you! Enjoy, and review to cheer me up!

***Remus***

Remus had borrowed James' Invisibility Cloak, and snuck to the kitchens, not wanting to face the questions of his friends as to why he was upset. He'd pleaded a migraine, and the need for quiet to them, an excuse he used for his full moon disappearances, sometimes. Unfortunately, it wasn't always an excuse, and the stress of that terrible Defense Against the Dark Arts class was in danger of bringing one on. He wondered how Ria knew so much about werewolves; she was muggleborn, and she'd put an amazing amount of effort and passion into her speech and the lecture when she took over the lesson.

He was seated at a small table in the corner of the kitchens, where the helpful House Elves had brought him a lovely dinner, contemplating having another serving of chocolate mousse, when the door opened. Instantly, half a dozen elves gravitated to the new comer, all but begging to help them, squeaking warm greetings. They apparently loved whoever it was; Remus couldn't see the door from here.

"Welcome Miss!"

"How can we help you, Miss?"

"We is glad to see you again Miss!" Ria's voice, warm and stifling laughter replied, far lower than the squeaky elves'.

"Hello, how are you all? I'm glad to see you again, Tipsy, Topsy, Pip, Dibs, Muffy, Netty and Flip." Wow, even James and I can't keep them straight, Remus thought, and we're in here all the time. I hadn't known Ria even knew where the Kitchens were.

"How can Dipsy help Miss?"

"Could you please get me a bit of dinner, I'm afraid I missed it." Ria said, apologetically. The elves squeaked in distress at the idea of one of their charges missing dinner, and scurried off to remedy the, in their opinion, crisis. One of them tugged Ria over to where Remus sat; absently having started his fourth helping of chocolate mousse, that one of the elves had slipped to him, while he was distracted.

"How is baby Winky? And your nephew Dobby, how are they, Dropsy?" She was focused on the tiny creature beside her, crouching to be more on the eyelevel of the miniscule being, who beamed up at her.

"Very well, Miss Ria. They is able to dust now, and Winky is only a week old, and Dobby two days older!"

"Impressive, I take it house elves grow up faster than human, then?" Ria never stopped wanting to know everything about anything.

"We is adult by the time we is ten, Miss, and we is slow to age, we can serve two or three generations of our masters. House elves live to serve, and we loves it! Especially when our masters is nice like Professor Dumbledore and Miss Ria, and Master Remus, and Master James, and Master Flitwick and Mistress McGonagall and-"

"I'm glad you enjoy it, Dropsy." Ria laughed, cutting off what promised to be a list of everyone in the castle who was nice to the hardworking little creatures. "I love what you did with the flowers this morning-" she had raised her voice to address all of the kitchen elves. The elves beamed.

"Miss is too kind!" Ria looked up, hearing Remus' chuckle. Her blue eyes lit up, dancing with delight. With no thought of dignity, she pounced on him with a hug, and stole his chocolate mousse, with a grin.

"Hey, you don't touch the chocolate!"

"But, Remmie, it's chocolate mousse," she said as if it explained everything, which, truly, it did, at least to him.

"Well, get your own! This one is mine!" He laughed, pushing her off.

"Fine! Be that way, you chocoholic." She sat across from him, snagging the chocolate mousse first. "Yes, I'm having dessert before dinner. Deal with it. I thought you might be here; you looked stressed, like you were beginning to get a migraine. I figured that your…erm… friends, would be a bit too loud for your taste at the moment." Her eyes were grey and sympathetic, with a secret hidden in the depths, and Remus wondered if she knew… no, she couldn't. Even his roommates hadn't figured it out after almost two years of living in constant proximity. They were constantly with him, and… no she didn't know, she was just sad that he wasn't feeling well. Being a good friend, she was just concerned for him, but she wouldn't be if she knew…but there was that rant in class today…

"Remmie, Remmie! Earth to Remus! Remus, yoo-hoo!"

"Hnuuh? Sorry, I spaced out." Remus said sheepishly.

"No, really?"

"Watch the sarcasm level, girl!"

"Watch your attitude, boy, I know where you sleep!"

"Ooo, threats, is it? I have the Marauders on my side."

"All I have to do is ask Lily to help me, and you've lost Potter. And the Marauders haven't been doing so well recently, now have they?" the tone of her voice was arch and teasing. Remus wanted to refute her points, but he couldn't. It was far too true for his preference.

"Shut up and eat, shrimp."

"You did not just pull the height card, beanpole!"

"Just because you're a midget-"

"I am not, you're just a skyscraper."

"Bloody HELL!" Sirius screamed like a little girl. Remus, James, Sirius, Peter and Frank struggled out of their beds in alarm. James groaned, fumbling for his glasses.

"Sirius it's…" he held the clock practically to his nose to read the large numbers, "six in the morning on a Saturday, what in the name of Merlin's shaggy beard is worth waking up the entire tower for?"

"I…you…argh!"

"Well that's articulate." Frank said sarcastically, and pulled aside his bed-curtains, only to pause, staring in shock. Sirius sported a tail, sprouting from the base of his spine, and floppy dog ears replaced his normal ones, rooted in his mop of curly black hair.

"Well, that's…different…" James said, and started to run his fingers through his messy black hair, in a habitual gesture. He froze, fingers investigating the hard additions to his skull.

"I have antlers, don't I?" Sirius was laughing too hard to reply, but Frank gave a faint nod. Peter emerged from his nest of blankets with a rat's tail, whiskers, and rat ears, much to his dismay. Remus, when he surfaced, had a fluffy white tail, and rabbit ears. Frank Longbottom was the only one who had escaped alteration, much to his relief. The other boys were entirely disgusted by their own predicament, but laughing hysterically at their friends. Eventually they made it down to the Common Room.

"Remus, what on earth happened to you?" Lily asked, giggling.

"I'd like to know, myself, Lily." The boy sighed. "I think it's Transfiguration, but I'm not sure. I'd hate to make it worse."

"Well, it's definitely transfiguration, but I don't think I can reverse it. You'll probably have to talk to Ria." Just then, an origami cat came prowling up to Remus, a tiny scroll in it's mouth. He picked it up, and it dropped the scroll. He was collecting these little creatures, because the craftsmanship was amazing. He unrolled the tiny piece of parchment, and started to laugh.

If you would know the meaning of my name,

You would chaw it in vain,

For the distance is always the same.

At its end a pot of gold to gain.

Remus knew exactly who had been pulling these pranks, and it was probably the lest likely person in the school. She'd played her game well, Ria had. In fact… he'd just let his friends figure out who it was on tier own.

"Rainbow." Lily said, reading over his shoulder. "Her name means Rainbow?" then a wicked grin spread across her face. "Oh, that girl is going far."

"Who is it?" Peter asked, eagerly.

"Figure it out yourselves." Lily said, smirking as she left.