"Kendall?" James asked softly, shaking the blonde's shoulder when his eyes started to slip shut. "C'mon, let's get to bed."
Kendall reached his hands out from the couch for James to help him out, smiling tiredly at his friend. "Dude, I'm just glad we can relax now. I may have no idea where the hell I am, but everything's pretty alright now."
James took the other's hands, holding them there for a moment and giving him this look that communicated the utter faggotry he was feeling right then. His band mate gave a slight smile, letting James pull him to his feet and sling his arms over his shoulders. Kendall raised an eyebrow, stepping closer and looking down to see James' hips pressing up against his own.
"I feel like having that pudding," Kendall decided, ruining the moment a little bit, but it was Kendall, so fuck it all.
"And I feel like fucking you," James replied honestly, turning his head to the side so his lips brushed against Kendall's cheek. He pressed forward, grinding up against his friend as to persuade him out of dessert and into bed.
"I see we have a difference of opinion here."
"Then let's make a compromise." James smirked, the steady smile faltering slightly as he really started to think about his implications.
"You're nasty."
"You're nasty."
"Hey, don't repeat me, bitch, if I wanted my own comeback I would've wiped it off your mom's face," Kendall retorted without missing a beat.
"Oh, shit," the other laughed, turning away from Kendall so he wouldn't be cracking up in his face. "Okay, you win."
"Yeah, whatever, I'm gonna go get the pudding." Kendall stepped back before thinking better of it, grabbing James' shoulder and making him stumble forward as their lips met awkwardly. Kendall appeased his friend with a brief, deep kiss, delving far into James' mouth before pulling back, licking his lips, and leaving for the kitchen.
"Son of a bitch," James whispered, watching Kendall walk out of the living room with purpose to find his fucking snacks, which apparently he wanted more than the most handsome being to walk the earth. Whatever.
Kendall returned with the bags of pudding and two spoons, grinning madly and standing in the doorway, looking at a very expectant James.
"You wanna go in our room? Or do you want Max to see me raping you?"
Kendall shrugged, heading off to the guest room and leaving James to fix his bangs compulsively before following. Upon entering the room, Kendall felt himself doing a mental dance. There was, quite truthfully, nothing better than the prospect of a warm bed to sleep in. Sleep was his best friend. Not Logan, not Carlos, definitely not James, not even unlimited fries. Not even pot, that was James' best friend.
He climbed up onto the bed, relaxing into the pillows and pulling a pudding cup out of the bag. That was the absolute peak of awesomeness: in bed with nowhere to be and no responsibilities whatsoever with your favourite food and a hot guy. Seriously. Awesome. Period.
Kendall picked up his spoon and peeled back the plastic seal of the pudding, dipping his spoon into the thick chocolaty deliciousness and bringing the cold dessert to his mouth. He practically melted into the bed the second the pudding touched his tongue, giving a rather obscene sounding moan at the taste and thanking god for headaches.
"This is so delicious," he said through the pudding that filled his mouth, savouring it for a moment longer before swallowing. Just as soon, the spoon went back into the plastic cup, Kendall eating and eating and never ever wanting to stop. Each bite was slow and deliberate, hence the never wanting to stop part, pausing to lick the pudding off his spoon every time before plunging it right back into the dessert.
James was caught between a glare and a look of amazement, brow furrowed and mouth slightly open. He walked over in a dazed stupor, sliding onto the bed beside Kendall and watching him eat.
"Kendall?" he asked slowly, watching Kendall's tongue run over the rounded tip of his spoon.
"Mmm," the blonde replied noncommittally, glancing at James out of his peripheral vision and leaning back into the bed.
Before Kendall could get any more pudding, James had grabbed the spoon and ripped it right out of Kendall's hand, setting it on the blankets behind him and staring at Kendall hungrily.
"What," Kendall demanded, irritated to the point of homicidal.
James didn't answer, gripping Kendall's chin and kissing him forcefully, the unique aftertaste of pudding all over his lips, mouth cold from the dairy product. Kendall twisted his fingers into the other's hair, returning the crushing kiss and sighing into James' mouth. The brunette wasted no time in taking action, hand going straight for the less than subtle bulge straining against the front of Kendall's jeans and squeezing. So much for picking fucking food over him.
Kendall pulled his lips away indignantly, watching James face as the latter concentrated on feeling Kendall up.
"James," he argued, just trying to eat his pudding in peace. "Get me off."
James smiled the biggest smile ever, leaning in to kiss Kendall's bare shoulder and increase the pressure of his fingers on his crotch. "Happily."
"No!" Kendall almost shrieked. "No no no! I meant 'get off me'! Jesus fucking Christ, I said that completely wrong! I meant 'get off me'!"
"Kendall?" James asked, still with a horribly devious look on his face, scooting closer to Kendall on top of the blankets. He moved his hand up to run it over Kendall's chest, giving him these horribly suggestive eyes. "Do you know what a freudian slip is?"
"Yes," Kendall grumbled. "And that was not one. That was the effect of me being so goddamn tired and hungry and having you molesting me. Even though you're really attractive."
Kendall wrenched his spoon out of James' hand, blushing madly and moving away from the other slightly. "I'll fuck you later, don't get me wrong, I want to, but right now I want pudding more. I know, I know, there's something deeply wrong with me, but I know you're not going anywhere so I'm managing my time according to priority."
"You know, you only had to say, like, half of the words you said."
The blonde boy set the plastic bag on his lap, reaching in and retrieving another pudding cup. He removed the lid, setting it next to the other ones and shooting a glare at James before starting on his fourth pudding. Man, it was so sosososo good.
"Alright, I guess I might as well have some," James decided, Kendall holding his pudding a little protectively and continuing to spoon large quantities of the dessert into his mouth. It was a good thing they'd bought, like, all the pudding in the store, because Kendall wasn't planning on stopping any time soon and if he had to share with James then it would definitely all be gone in due time.
James reached into the plastic bag, taking extra care to grope Kendall through the plastic before getting a pudding cup and starting to eat it, pretending he wasn't continually violating Kendall's personal space (like he had any to violate).
"Hey Kendall," he started, getting that scheming look and eating his pudding all dainty and womany while Kendall was in the process of ditching his spoon altogether so he could just dump the chocolate pudding into his mouth.
Kendall made a noise in reply past the pudding cup he was occupied with, glancing over at James and squeezing the plastic cup so he could consume more, faster.
"How about sex and pudding?" James proposed, spoon hanging from his lips.
Kendall's face wrinkled in disgust. "That's gross, James. That is so gross."
"Hey, don't knock it till you try it," the other said logically, shrugging and setting down his pudding next to him.
"James, I hate you. You know, and I know, I'm sticking to my party pooper policy where I have to try new things unless they're stupid or dangerous or involve Carlos at all, so, you know what? I'll be optimistic and say this could be alright. Even though it's gross.
"Awesome," James agreed, leaning over to mouth at Kendall's neck gently. This time, instead of shrugging him off, Kendall leaned into the touch, slipping an arm around James' back and shifting closer. It was kind of nice, anyway.
Kendall reached over to the other, toying with the waist of James' pants before trying and failing to get the button undone. Sighing, he brought his other hand around, getting the pants open and sliding his fingers inside. James bucked up into his hand, encouraging him as he brought his mouth up to reach Kendall's.
Kendall let a wanting sound into his mouth, tugging down James' underwear carefully and taking the pants with them. He felt James smirking, and ran a hand down to touch at the inside of his thigh.
"Stop teasing," James complained, reaching down to jack himself off at a decent pace.
"Well sorry," Kendall replied, James reaching over to grab the bag and extract a pudding cup. He peeled it open, discarding the lid and dipping his fingers into the cool chocolate. Kendall watched as he reached down, smearing some on Kendall's lips and the rest on his own dick.
Deliberately, he took more from the cup to transfer it to the head of his cock, which was pressed to his stomach, Kendall licking his lips and glancing up at James for further direction.
"You wanted your pudding, so eat it," he ordered, tangling his fingers in Kendall's hair as the blonde moved up to do as he said. Kendall smirked, gripping the base of James' erection and licking a clean stripe up to the tip. "No way are you choosing pudding over this degree of handsome, not if I have anything to say about it."
"Stop saying 'handsome', you sound like a moron," Kendall grumbled, turning his head to lick the pudding off James' flushed cock. He had to say, this new combination of a couple favourite foods of his was starting to grow on him. A lot. He looked up at James again before shifting down slightly and closing his lips over the head of James' dick, beginning to suck harshly and feeling James' cock react to it.
He heard the sound of James' head hitting against the wall above the headboard of the bed, Kendall starting to move his lips up and down further and faster. James let out a punctured sigh, fingers restlessly playing with the hem of his boxers. Kendall pulled off for a moment, hand taking over as he regained his composure. Every so often, his gag reflex would kick in, and when he wasn't even that far down on James too. Stupid human reactions, stupid biology. He didn't need a fucking gag reflex. That was the last thing he needed.
Refreshed, he went back to his task, James' upper half moving to do god knows what as he worked on James. Blowjobs were a lot of work, they really were, straight men and lesbians could never truly appreciate the effort that goes in, Kendall thought, moving his arm up so that James could reach down under him.
He pulled off James, gasping as he felt James' hand slide under the waist of his jeans, feeling slick coolness go up past his balls so that James could rub at his entrance gently. Warily, Kendall pushed his hips back away from James, hoping to distract him with a kiss and an extra great handjob. The fingers, the dreaded fingers. He hated that part; it was way too deliberate for him.
"Hey," James murmured, pulling his lips away from Kendall's just slightly. "Turn around."
Kendall grunted in acknowledgement of his sentence, dissatisfied. James took his hand out of Kendall's pants, Kendall pushing his pants down and sitting next to James so he could get them all the way off. He felt more exposed than he should have, leaving his grey jeans near the end of the bed and turning around so that he faced them.
"On your hands and knees," James clarified, watching Kendall climb over his legs and into the desired position. The brunette cleared his throat, pudding cup still in hand as he coated a finger in the thick dessert. Kendall watched over his shoulder as James slid the tip of his finger into him, moving it slightly before pushing it in further. Kendall grimaced at the uncomfortable feeling, letting a resigned sigh and closing his eyes until James had his index finger all the way in.
Kendall was pleasantly surprised at how good a substitute pudding was for lubrication. James twisted the finger inside of him, pushing it in and out slowly before getting more pudding onto his hand and adding another cold finger.
"Dude, that…" Kendall trailed off, about to tell James how uncomfortable he was but not wanting to sound like a pussy. He could handle that of all things and wouldn't admit to anyone that he felt he couldn't. Especially not James, of all the people on God's green earth. Kendall shuddered at the fingers delving inside him, going ways that he never thought his ass went. "…ugh," he finished, biting his lower lip.
Kendall breathed a sigh of relief as James took his fingers back where they belonged, James' tongue hot and damp as he licked the excess pudding from around Kendall's hole. He got a noncommittal groan out of Kendall, the latter shifting his hips and feeling the pudding inside him. Damn, that was nasty nasty nasty.
"Ah, man," Kendall sighed, getting off the bed and standing next to it. "I just…that feels weird. It feels distinctly pudding, man, it's gross." James crawled over so that he was in front of Kendall and slipped off the bed as well, standing in front of Kendall, leaning on the mattress.
Kendall squirmed slightly, leaning down to kiss James roughly, James standing up on his own without the bed's help and reaching around with both hands to grab at Kendall's ass and push their lower halves together. Kendall felt his breathing get harder as James' cock slid forcefully against his own. James took a second pudding cup that he'd opened, returning to Kendall's entrance with the fingers, but, thankfully, just rubbing at his opening before sliding up and leaving Kendall's backside sticky with chocolate pudding.
Kendall pushed James up against the bed, James leaning back into the mattress as Kendall took control and started grinding against the other, rutting up between his spread legs and watching his face for every little reaction. James' lips were parted, teeth clamped down around his tongue as he pushed his hips back into Kendall's desperately. He moved his hands to try and grope Kendall again and push him harder against himself, fingers slipping around in the chocolate mess instead and serving no use to him.
James slid down with a little help from gravity and the fact that his leg bones felt like pudding themselves, Kendall pushing him all the way onto the floor and climbing over him. The power had kind of shifted from James to Kendall, Kendall hovering over James and placing a soft kiss on his mouth.
"Dude," James giggled, pressing a pudding handprint into Kendall's chest as he pushed him up to grab the Stater Brothers bag off the bed. With it he took his half-empty cup of pudding, crushing the plastic cup so the contents were squeezed into his other hand.
He reached down with a pudding-coated palm, wrapping his hand around Kendall's dick and jerking him off quickly. Kendall yelped at the coldness, heart rate jumping up as James continued his motions with vigour.
"Dude…James, that…awesome," he decided, kissing James again just because he wanted to. The pudding was still a little disgusting as far as he was concerned, but James kind of made up for it, kind of. James' hand slowed down a bit with the distraction of Kendall's mouth, and he eventually took it back, slicking up his own cock and pulling his hips back.
"You want me to fuck you?" James asked, tone very nice and polite despite the bluntness of what he said.
"Yeah," the other breathed, looking down and biting at his lip. "Do you…I mean, are we….like, did you have…never mind." Kendall sighed, feeling stupid and a little bit nervous.
"Did I have what?" James pressed, kissing at Kendall's jaw and feeling the blonde tilt his head back.
"I said never mind," Kendall muttered. "I was gonna ask about a condom, but then I realised that I don't really care and that I'm not gonna get pregnant and that if you have some kind of weird homo STD then I probably already have it."
"I have one if you wanted to use it," James told him, his concern for Kendall's well being as a friend surfacing in the rather awkward moment.
"Dude, no," Kendall said, rolling his eyes and giving James a quick peck on the lips. "I really, really don't care."
"You sure you wanna do this?" James asked, becoming a little unsure of himself suddenly. This was Kendall, this was what he'd been dreaming about, this was what he'd been constantly fucking thinking about, this was, like. It. The last thing he wanted to do was screw up. And he had a bad habit of screwing up, big time. The difference with this time is that it actually mattered to him, somehow.
Kendall pushed his hair out of his face, sighing. "Please don't chicken out on me now, man. You instigated this, you got pudding all over the place, you made me hard as fuck, and you are going to fuck me right here and now.
James shuddered at the forcefulness of the other, giving Kendall a shallow, teasing kiss and biting at his lip. He could do this. And it would be awesome.