A/N: Ok-ay, this series, while amusing, is getting overly long. Let's see about my wrapping it up so we can get back to Green Lantern and co, shall we? I know me. This might end up at 25+ chapters before we can get back to GL. To that end, I'll try to wrap it up in 3 chaps, this included…
...
FATE/Holy Grail War of 2814
by Shadow Crystal Mage
Chapter 10: Changes
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters in this story. If I did… well, this would all be canon. WARNING: MAY CAUSE HEAD EXPLOSION!
...
When Batman regained consciousness, he found himself lying on the ground staring up at the dark-skinned one who called himself Archer.
"Let this be a lesson to you, young man," he said, in a disturbingly passable imitation of Alfred. "Don't go riding in strange people's cars, particularly if– urk!"
Batman slammed him against the nearest tree, glaring at him.
"Right, I probably should have been expecting that," Archer wheezed. "You realize I'm not alone, right?"
There was a sudden feeling of the space behind him not being empty. Batman tensed internally, while giving absolutely not sign he gave a damn.
"You wanted to talk…" the one behind him said. "Talk."
Batman didn't turn his head. He didn't relinquish his hold on Archer. "Over the past week, several of Fuyuki City's organized crime elements have been brutally attacked. Were you behind it?"
The responding tone should have had some kind of facial expression attached to it. "Obviously…"
"Why?" Batman demanded.
Archer rolled his eyes. "Don't bother. Might as well ask why deep space is black instead of duck-egg blue. It's just one of those things. Gold Reaper is madly in love with Green Lantern, Magus Erebus attracts girls of highly inappropriate ages like planets attract falling objects, Diana is a disturbingly good PI, people die if they are killed– " he paused, and added conscientiously, "– usually, and Batman fights crime. It's the way the universe works. "
Batman did turn then, just a little. The figure behind him was enormous, clearly bigger than he was, bigger than Bane, but the silhouette…
"That's impossible," he said flatly.
"Says the man who was a protocol in place to meet Static when he shows up in the Batcave again because of that time-travel thing a few years ago," Archer said blandly.
"I heard the exposition at the church," Batman argued. "This…ritual… uses the souls of dead heroes. I'm not dead. And how do you know all that?-!"
"Neither am I, technically," Archer said. "That doesn't mean anything to the Grail. It takes it's heroes from across time. And given enough time, everyone dies…"
"($&&()#%#$^^*)^&#^$^*(^)($^*!-!-!-!-!"
"We're wasting time…" Berserker said. "It's coming…"
Batman scowled. "This isn't over."
"Yes, but in the mean time, could drive the Bat-tank over there?" Archer said, leaping for the motorcycle meant to run over and crush puny cars. "Watch out for trees."
Batman glared at him, then at Berserker, then at where the roar had come from. Then his eyes widened as trees began flying towards them. He dove for the still open car door.
"That, right there?" Archer said, pointing. "So worth dying and getting summoned back here for."
"Shut up, you…"
"($&&()#%#$^^*)^&#^$^*(^)($^*!-!-!-!-!"
"Trace, on!" Archer cried, a nodachi appearing in his hand as he revved up his cycle, charging forward as he cut trees out of his way. "And for the record, why does this thing have guns and missiles when you're not supposed to kill people?"
"It's for cars, buildings and robots…"
Archer sighed. "And it's all plausible…"
Panels slid aside on the car, and many examples of said weaponry extruded.
"Let's get this over with," Batman growled.
More trees flew at them as the Berserker-Invader came closer. The ground started to shake.
"Does anyone remember what this one looked like?" Archer asked.
The ground shook again.
"I can take a wild guess," Batman said grimly as he powered up weapons systems.
Archer stared. "Is that a forty-foot Evangelion? Bruce, why didn't you remember that?" he hissed.
"I think my brain blocked it out…"
"We're screwed…"
...
"Targets found," Vita said, snapping her eyes open. "They're under some kind of barrier, and it's messed up the scan, but I can find them."
"A… barrier," Signum murmured. "How convenient for you… it certainly justifies your incompetence at being able to perform such a simple spell."
Vitas hammer streaked for Signum's head, her golden eyes blazing in rage, but before contact could be made, Signum's slap had already sent her flying, and it took her a while to regain her equilibrium, such as it was. A further cry of rage and a charge was interrupted by a backhanded strike of Laevatein's sheath. Zafira growled in blood-thirsty approval.
"I tolerate your insubordination for the sake of Hayate's pleasures, knight," Signum said, using the same inflection people used for 'scumbag ho needs to learn her place'. "But there are limits."
Vita said a long series of words in Ancient Belkan best translated as (BLEEP).
Signum slapped her again. "Enough," she said, unperturbed. "We're here to collect Linker Cores. Let us do so before more mages and that Hayate-damned green girl arrive. Move."
Vita cast her one last hateful look before she led the way, Signum and Zafira following her, blazing a trail to Einzbern Castle.
...
"Your fireball expands to 20 feet, stopping just inches from the rogue's nose," Harry said.
Tavi frowned. "Wait, fire doesn't work like that. Wouldn't it expand more in the cramped confines of the hallway? And what about the heat?"
Harry sighed, opening his Player's Hand Book and pointing. "It says a 20-foot sphere. Just go with it."
"But that doesn't make sense!" Tavi said.
"Would you rather play 'Maid RPG' again?"
"So, just short of the rogues nose was it? Do his eyebrows at least shrivel up?"
"Yes, he's missing an eyebrow."
They stared at each other.
"Okay, first chance we get, we're either getting better games, or some books," Harry said. "Guarding this gate is bor-ring!"
"Maybe we can ask some of the monks to play…" Tavi said wistfully.
...
Kuro stared out over the forest around the castle, idly wondering how hard it would be to manually hi-jack one of the missile launch systems Kiritsugu had installed in some of the turrets. It probably wouldn't work against the big whatever-it-was out there, since they were anti-aircraft– or in this case, anti-airborne-giant-fake-Servant– weapons, but then she could get creative. She was shrouded in darkness, since they didn't want to draw attention to the castle. All the curtains had been drawn inside, and lights were kept to a minimum.
She sighed, staring moodily out into the dark forest, the wind blowing her hair, veiling her face. She clasped her hand before her, obviously thinking dark, moody thoughts…
And whirled, her casual cloths dissolving away into her reds and blacks as she parried the croquet mallet streaking towards her head with the black blade in her hand as she stabbed with the white blade in the other. The shock from the impact, stronger than she thought it would be, knocked her slightly off, allowing her opponent to dodge. She pressed the attack, blades whirling, not letting her have the opportunity to swing her hammer properly.
"We saw Matou's body, you idiot," Kuro snarled as she charged. "It was kind of obvious you hit him from behind. You think I'd fall for that? What happened to charging in with all your buddies and new toys and causing a scene?"
"It became counter-productive," a voice behind her said.
Kuro didn't turn. She had no time to.
And more to the point, she had no need to.
Miyu and Illya streaked from the doorway they'd been hiding, Miyu's Excalibur intercepting Laevatein as it came down on Kuro's back, locking the weapon in place for a precious moment.
"Ruby! Maximum concentration point-blank range blast!" Illya cried, swinging the wand at Signum. Energy leapt from the end, a thin beam meant to avoid Miyu and do as much damage to the knight as possible.
Zafira leapt into its path, a barrier in place. The attack pierced the barrier, but it had been angled enough to deflect the remaining energy, tearing through the overhanging roof directly above them. He lunged at Illya, who backed of hurriedly, primitive primate instincts screaming in terror as ancestral memories of similarly fanged creatures tearing primitive man apart made themselves known. She dodged, throwing herself off the balcony and into the air, and Zafira darted after her.
"Kaleido Ruby!" Miyu cried, distracted. Signum's foot lashed out, and Miyu barely managed to get out of the way, parrying Signum's follow-up strike with her own blade. Holy golden blade met dark, crimson-veined Armed Device the the ringing of metal began to fill the air.
"You didn't actually think it would be that easy getting in, did you?" Kuro said as she pressed her attack, keeping Vita unable to properly use Graf Eisen, staying within the weapon's range. "We have a Boundary Field around this whole forest that tells us where people are. We had you guys pegged the minute you hit our airspace. We had radar designed to pick up human-sized targets. Heck, Green Lantern-chan's had us expecting you for days. Did you really think it would be that easy?"
Vita turned rage-filled golden eyes towards Kuro. "I am sick," she growled, "of you children getting in my WAY!"
Exhaust vented from Graf Eisen, right into Kuro's face, and she stumbled back, coughing and blinking at the unfamiliar gases. A cartridge loaded into the hammer. "Gigantform!"
Vita swung the now-oversized hammer, catching Kuro completely of guard, though she tried to make a token defense with her daggers. Sadly, the light blades were no match for such a high-mass weapon. There was the sickening crack of bone as Kuro's arm broke, and her pained screamed echoed through the night.
"KURO!"
Illya streaked downward from the night sky, Zafira in pursuit. She didn't seem to care. "GET AWAY FROM MY SISTER! MAXIMUM SCHNEIDEN!"
The cutting attack ripped through the stone behind Vita as her knight armor tore across her torso, the black, red-veined seeming-cloth erupting outwards as it expended its power trying to protect its wearer. The knight was thrown back hard, blood welling from the gash across her stomach.
In the momentary pause after letting out the blast, Zafira pounced. Illya was barely able to redirect power to he physical barriers, keeping from being eviscerated, but the magical energy in he guardian beats claws was still enough to tear through her weakened magical protections. Stupid Lucas Art piece of junk energy distribution system! Illya managed to think as she was borne down to the ground.
This time Miyu managed to keep herself from turning at the sounds, but it was a close thing. Signum was relentless, and her sword had caught fire at some point, which was just wrong.
"Your allies have fallen," Signum said as the sounds behind Miyu indicated that Zafira was attacking Miyu at close quarters. "You will soon join them. I take no pleasure in your defeat. But you will fall."
From where Kuro had fallen, there was a crackle of static. "Kuro?"
"They're here," Kuro gasped out. "Over."
"We have more allies," Miyu said.
As if in reply, chains wrapped around Signum's sword and arms.
Signum was ripped bodily away from Miyu by Rider's chains, sending her flying into the wall of the castle. Miyu turned instantly, dismissing Signum from her world as she charged at Zafira, who Illya was barely keeping back with dangerous, random close-range shots.
"These girls out with us," Rider said as she dropped down from the roof. "Come at your own peril." As she spoke, she shot one of her daggers straight at the knight's heart. Signum managed to deflect the weapon, her own black armor glowing with red veins, making her visible. Managing to slip out of her chains, she charged, fully flying now. Rider met her attack, a black blur with a purple contrail, chains wavering in the air.
Miyu's attack got Zafira moving, but he focused his attack on her. White spikes erupted form the ground, impaling her legs and holding her in place. He feinted to the side, charging at her unprotected back as she tried her best to defend from a rear attack when she couldn't turn.
A black blur flew through the air, striking into Zafira's shoulder, and causing a small explosion that threw the guardian best to the side. Kuro struggled upright, her good arm dropping back to clutch her broken one, her breathing ragged. Her side was obviously bruised, and the outline of at least one broken rib could be seen. "Get away from my bitch," she gasped.
Illya slammed Ruby's head against the spikes as she directed energy at them, disrupting the working and causing them to collapse, freeing Miyu. "Kuro, stay down! You're hurt!" Illya said.
Kuro snorted, them winced as one rib visibly moved. "Fuck that. I need to take care of my bitches," she said.
"You're making less sense than usual," Illya said.
Kuro ignored her, closing her eyes as she placed her good hand on her ribs. The outlines of small swords began to squirm through the skin. "Hammer loli's not down yet."
"Huh?" Illya said, turning to Kuro in time to see Vita looming over her, hammer already on the down-stroke.
From the balcony doorway, Luvia's voice called out, "Gandr."
The shot struck Vita, knocking her a bit off, putting her hammer momentarily in the grasp of gravity and momentum. From Luvia's side, Lancer streaked forward, his spear aimed right at he weapon's head, slamming into with with blurring force and making it completely miss Kuro, who winced at the close call.
Lancer glared at Vita with disgust. "A kid," he said. "You want me to fight a kid?"
"Just take her down Lancer," Kuro said dryly.
"You know, as much as you rag on Archer about his fashion sense, you two are similarly annoying," Lancer said, spinning his spear in an attempt to 'gently' knock Vita unconscious.
With a howl, she knocked his spear out of the way, and struck, hitting him with bone-crushing force three times before he managed to overcome his surprise and start parrying and blocking her attacks. Fortunately, his armor, suc has it was, seemed to have held up well under the blows, but he had obviously felt those blows. Luvia sniped form the door, supporting her Servant with cover fire.
"Damn it!" she cried out. "Where the heck is 'Little Miss Broken' and that new guy?"
...
There had been three major point of entry identified for the Wolkenritter to have chosen to try and use to gain entry, unless they'd chosen to make their own doors. There had been the east terrace balcony, where Team Loli had been waiting, the West terrace balcony, where Rider, Luvia and Lancer had been lurking, the rear door, where Sakura had volunteered to go, and the Front hall, with all its windows and the doors that had led to the parapets. Gilgamesh had stood in the latter, loud as brass and just as shiny. When the alert call from Kuro had come in, he'd started to head for the balconies, though he was taking his dear sweet time about it, ignoring Kiritsugu's cursing at him to hurry up from the control room where he and the maids were holed up.
Sakura, however…
She stood, unseeing, hidden just outside the rear door by her shadows. Seemingly dead to the world, she just stared outwards into the night.
The shudder that ran through her seemed unnatural, like a statue suddenly coming to life. Crimson eyes opened as purple hair turned white and lengthened. Clothes reformed, not made of shadows now, but of something else.
For the first time in ten years, the being Sakura called 'Kaze-neechan', Shukufuku-no-Kaze, opened her eyes, and breathed. She stared up at the balcony where Servants fought nights, and sighed in sadness. "Duty," she said, the words coming out strange, as if disused. "I have to do my duty. I'm sorry, knights."
She waved her hand, forming the spell she rode to battle on as she launched herself into the sky. Ominous Lantin chanting began to follow her.
"Estuans interius, ira vehementi…"
...
The roof was an utter mess. Rider and Signum's clash had quickly moved upward, their blows missing as often as not and doing horrible things to the roof tiles around them. Below, Luvia ahd managed to pull Kuro away to the relative safety of the doorway, and was doing what she could to help put the girl together. She'd managed to realign Kuro's arm bones, and used her skirts and the white blade Kuro still had as a splint.
Kuro frowned up from where she was finished apparently repairing her ribcage. There were now a lot of disturbing tooth-like outlines under the skin. "Does anyone else hear… music?"
"…Estuans interius, ira vehementi…"
No one paused in the fighting to listen, but they all really wanted to.
"Reinforce! Reinforce!"
"Trace, on!" a deep, feminine voice said as it swooped up from below, a nodachi appearing in it's hand. "In Celebration of Elegant Swordswoman AngelGARd's First Kiss With Her Maguis Albus Ojou-sama Strike."
The exorcising sword technique blasted straight through a surprised Rider and straight into Signum, who cried out in pain and surprise, black mist seeming to explode from her armor where the attack had struck, leaving only steel-colored plates and pink fabric.
"…Estuans interius, ira vehementi…"
"Sakura…?" Rider breathed.
"Technically," the woman said, her long silver hair not having so much as a stray strand as she landed on the roof. "Let me deal with this, Rider-san. It's the reason I'm here. Make sure none interfere, please."
Rider frowned. "But–"
"Rider…" Sakura's gentle voice said. "Please…"
Rider paused, then stepped back.
A symbol appeared beneath the woman's feet, a dark, triangular outline in black that paradoxically seemed to glow. It illuminated the woman's black boots, leather pants, long back coat, and belts.
"…Estuans interius, ira vehementi…"
"A… a Belkan Triangle?" Signum said, looking shocked.
The woman pointed her sword at Signum. "In the name of the Queen of the Night Sky, Regina Diabolica, I judge you, Signum of the Wolkenritter, General of the Raging Fire, Servant Most Devoted to She Who Is Bound To The Book! Surrender with honor, or taste my steel!"
One golden eye and one blue stared in shock at the woman, before both narrowed, and the grip on Laevatien shifted. "I can't do that," Signum said, voice filled with quiet determination. Her armor seemed to writhe as blackness slowly covered it at a snail's pace, red veins slowly regrowing. "I have my duty. What is your name, who knows so much?"
The woman smiled. "I am the Blessed Wind that protects and strengthens. I am the soul bound to the Book Of the Night Sky. As my theme music says, I am–"
"Reinforce! Reinforce!"
"Reinforce," the woman continued smoothly. "And I am here to do as my Queen commands."
She waved a hand. "Forced Transfer."
Beneath Signum, a triangular symbol appeared.
Below, Lancer, Miuya and Illya were knocked back by some kind of force as similar symbols appeared beneath their own opponents. There were three flares of light… and suddenly, the roof was a lot more quiet.
"May I be forgiven for what I have just done…" Reinforce murmured, closing her eyes. She collapsed, and only Rider's quick action prevented her from hitting the ground. The triangle beneath her had disappeared, and in what little light there was now, Rider could clearly see she held Sakura.
"What the fuck just happened?-!" Kuro's voice demanded.
Gilgamesh stuck his head out. "Is the fight over already? Why did you bother calling me over for?"
...
In the woods, a triangle appeared, the three Wolkenritter reappearing in a muted flash.
"The hell?" Vita cried. "Where are we?"
"($&&()#%#$^^*)^&#^$^*(^)($^*!-!-!-!-!"
...
Things were not going well.
"Things are not going well," Archer commented as he dodged the series of trees Berserker-Evangelion threw at him. "Though I wouldn't have pegged Kirei as an Evangelion fan… no, wait, I totally could. 'Angels' come to destroy humanity, betrayals and human suffering left and right? He probably jacks off to it… "
"Shut. Up," Berserker said.
"Shut up now," Batman agreed from inside his Batmobile, firing up some missiles, which exploded harmlessly against the torso. "I'm out."
"You two really need to get laid," Archer commented as he sliced another tree he couldn't dodge. "All this deforestation can't possibly be good for flood control."
The fight, such as it was, had been running for some time. They'd managed to lure the thing away from where, as Archer put it, 'important things were going down' and away from the castle in general, but it had torn through a lot o the forest to do it. For it's size, it was ridiculously fast, and the trees barely slowed it down when it wasn't using them for ammo. Archer had lost his cycle early on in a rush attack to try to destroy one of the things ankles to get it to fall, to no effect. Apparently, this one had been reinforced in that area.
They'd been expecting the castle to launch more missiles at it, but none had been forthcoming, and given how fast it moved and all the populated areas behind it, that was probably just as well. Thank goodness they were only buying time.
The Batmobile charged forward, narrowly avoiding a car-sized fist as it streaked towards one leg, brakes squealing as it slid sideways to slam over one foot. Spikes drove into the ground, locking it in place as the jet booster at the back was cranked up to maximum, it's flame automatically setting every bit of underbrush beneath it alight.
Apparently, even pseudo-metal formed from the bodies of incarnations of human evil will melt.
"Trace, on!" Archer cried, calling his bow, a green arrow appearing in is other hand. It had 'TNT' helpfully written on one side. He looked at it and shook his head, recycling it for raw materials into a different arrow, this one dark purple. It had a 'Piffle Princess' logo on it, next to a nuclear hazard symbol. "Fire in the hole!" he cried, drawing back the bow.
Batman set the car's self-destruct (Catastrophic rather than Intimidate), and ejected.
Archer loosed.
Berserker's chains snapped forward to snag Batman and pulled him out of range as the arrow flew past, striking the heat-weakened point.
Archer turned around completely, averting his eyes as Berserker covered Batman with his weird-creepy slice-of-the-night cape.
There was a brilliant flash that looked like it should have been visible form space, and a sudden shockwave sent them all flying as what sounded like the souls of the damned screamed from the explosion. The three were sent flying and tumbling as nearby trees bent away fro the source of the blast. The air overhead whistled with the sounds of flying Batmobile pieces.
The Berserker-Evangelion fell backwards ponderously, trying to catch itself as it fell, and another shockwave erupted as it hit the ground.
Batman deactivated the earplugs in his cowl. "What the hell was that?"
Archer pulled the cotton he'd Traced out of his ears, wincing. "Tactical Atomic Arrow," he said. "Star Sapphire might be a Blue Angel-obsessed lunatic, but she makes good stuff. And by good stuff, I mean scary shit. I can't believe she made a contained nuclear weapon simple enough for me to Trace."
"Where was I when that was happening?" Berserker asked, the menace-level in his voice slightly elevated.
"I'm sure I don't know," Archer said.
"($&&()#%#$^^*)^&#^$^*(^)($^*!-!-!-!-!"
Archer sighed. "While I didn't expect it to be dead, that sound is still very depressing. How long has it been since we ditched the Masters and Saber? Half an hour? Forty-five minues?"
"Six hours…"
Archer blinked. "And we didn't notice?"
"YOU didn't notice…" Berserker corrected.
"Wow…" Archer breathed as the Berserker-Evangelion leveled itself to its knees. "Six straight hours… truly, a Hero of Justice is a being beyond mortal capabilities."
"The sad thing is I can't tell if you're being serious…"
"Big giant robot trying to kill us," Batman reminded them, having long since gotten back on his feet and assessed the situation. "You know, in case you forgot."
Archer shakily got to his feet. Berserker was simply standing, not seeming to have passed through any kind of transition point. Archer created another bow, knocking another purple arrow into it. The Berserker-Evangelion raised its head, its demonic face glaring at them. Pustule-like blasting points erupted from its body.
"Huh. Forgot it had those," Archer said.
They dived aside, each doing their own brand of absurd acrobatics to avoid the blasts. Berserker's size was a point against him in this, in that there was a statistically higher chance he'd get hit then Archer would, but he was still faster and more nimble, and his own mass meant that the purely-kinetic attacks affected him less. Archer kept a Megalomesembrian Shield-sword between him and the Invader, wielding it like it weighed nothing. It was one of the few perks of having an elemental alignment that came out 'swords'. Plus, they were both Servants, and could take a lot of physical punishment. Batman, not as fast or as durable as the two, compensated by using cover and throwing explosives in the path of the blast waves to cancel or reduce them while the other two tried to draw fire away from him.
The forest seemed to getting brighter, Archer noticed. He tried to find the horizon, but there was too much in the way. Still, there was a definite pinkish tinge in the sky he couldn't attribute to light pollution…
...
Emiya Shiro sighed, staring out over the seemingly tranquil forest outside the place they'd spent the night. 'Seemingly' because they could clearly hear the battle that was still ongoing. He'd been surprised he hadn't noticed until a little while ago. Had it really been all night? Rin had pushed him out, saying that they had adjustments to do, or something.
He blushed as he recalled what had distracted him, and sighed. Well, this was probably a one-time thing. He still couldn't believe Saber was King Arthur. He figured she was Joan of Arc or something.
All this, however, was Shiro just trying to think polite thoughts while the rest of his brain and some other attendant organs partied under a banner that read "SHIRO JUST HAD SEX AND HIS FIRST TIME WAS A THREESOME WITH RIN AND KING ARTHUR! WE ARE SO COOL!-!-!"
Shiro shook his head. He'd have to forget it for now. He might not survive the run up to the castle if he allowed himself to be distracted by thoughts of how soft Saber's skin was, or how good it felt, or how Rin had done that thing with her tongue, or–
Frantically, he shook his head, wiping the drool form the corner of his mouth and looking down to make sure it wasn't to obvious what he was thinking. Apparently, even a Magus-like physiology could only do so much, and he sighed in relief.
Staring up at a tree branch, Shiro pondered what he could do. It had definitely not escaped him that out of every, he was by far the least useful. Still, that curve was sort of skewed. After all, he was basically just some kid with a simple magic trick his father had taught him– and quite incorrectly, at that, it turned out– thrust into events beyond his comprehension, in the company of people who knew what they were doing, had been doing it far longer than him, and knew what was going on. Who doesn't end up looking like an idiot in that sort of situation? If there were less people around who could do interesting things, then he might be able to give some sort of useful output.
Taking a branch, on the ground, he considered it, toying with a notion he'd been playing with. Archer, Kuro, even Sakura– and had that come as a shock!– had all claimed when asked that what they did was merely a variation of Reinforcement and something called Gradation Air, though Archer referred to it as 'Projection'.
He closed his eyes, analyzing the branch. He'd say one thing about having so many magic experts around, it was wonderful not to be in extreme agony every time he tried to do magic– and being able to actually do magic, for that matter. He let the magic flow into the branch, strengthening and emphasizing aspects of it…
"Is that a bow, Shiro, or are you just really happy to see us?"
Shiro's eyes snapped open, staring up at Rin and Saber, who'd just stepped out from the ruin. He ignored the mass disappoint of the 'party' at the fact both were fully clothed, although there was a hint of a white stain at the top of Rin's stockings. He averted his face to keep them from seeing his blush, although Rin's chuckle made it perfectly clear he'd failed utterly.
The branch in his hands wasn't a branch anymore. It was, instead, a very ugly but seemingly serviceable bow. There was even a bowstring, though he had not idea where that had come from.
"I was just…" he said hesitantly. "I was just thinking that I needed to be able to do something if one of those… things is still around. After all, I can't let the two of you do everything. What kind of a man would I be then?"
There wasn't even so much as a flicker or tinge on Saber's face. Shiro really thought there would have been. Rin just grinned her wide, eat-shit (because she certainly wasn't going to) grin. It made him blush even more.
"Shiro is correct," Saber said. "Though the main battle seems to be away from us," she nodded at the general direction of the explosions and screams of tortured metal, with the occasional indistinct cry of a technique, "it would only be wise for the enemy to have spread smaller forces to attempt an infiltration action under its cover. While I can conceivably defend us against any of the smaller ones, the faster we finish them off, the less likely they are to form one of the larger abominations. I would be very surprised if we did not encounter at least one or two on our route back to the castle."
"I'm not going back to the castle," Rin said.
Saber and Shiro, who'd been about to pick up some branches for arrows, blinked. "Rin?" Shiro asked.
Rin glared at where the battle was happening. "Archer still has some explaining to do. If I don't keep an eye on him, the faking little weasel might try to pull something. Go on without me."
"I can't just let you go by yourself!" Shiro said. "It's dangerous!"
Rin rolled her eyes. "Shiro, I think you have more than enough evidence to prove I can take care of myself."
"It's the principle of the thing!" Shiro protested. "As a man, I can't just let you go walking into danger like that! I'll come with you!"
Rin glared at him. "We have sex one time– "
"Seven," Saber corrected her gently. "Or was it 17?"
"– one night," Rin continued, "And you think you can tell me what to do?"
She didn't even look embarrassed about it, damn her. "No," Shiro said. "I think we're allies who all agreed to watch each other's backs. You've saved me and watched out for me a lot of times, Rin. At least let me try to repay you back. I don't want to have to explain to Archer why anything happened to you. Knowing him, he'd skewer me."
Rin seemed a bit taken aback by this, as if she hadn't been expecting him to try this argument. "Well, I suppose that's all right, then," she said. "But let's get a move on, all right? I don't want to think of what that faker might be doing behind my back."
Shiro nodded. "I'll just make some arrows…"
...
"I'm going to need better arrows," Shiro said. He desperately wanted to suggest they just turn around and pretend they didn't see this, but he knew enough about both women to know this wouldn't be received at all, never mind 'not well'. Then his brain kicked in with something else. "Saber, don't you dare use your Noble Phantasm on that thing."
"I doubt what mana I have could possibly affect it," Saber said, and even she seemed intimidated. "It's… big."
Shiro shuffled nervously.
"Are you going to help or what!-?" Archer cried.
Rin threw a rock in his face.
"Is that a no?" Archer said, once it had fallen off.
"He doesn't have much in the way of a self-preservation instinct, does he?" Batman muttered to Berserker.
"None I've ever been able to identify…"
"($&&()#%#$^^*)^&#^$^*(^)($^*!-!-!-!-!"
"Oh, shut up…"
The Berserker-Evangelion dashed at them on all fours, its stump not seeming to significantly slow it down as it tore at them in an insane frenzy. It looked like it could do this all day. Berserker seemed to have taken to carrying Batman around, and while he seemed to be quite annoyed by this development, he wasn't objecting.
Shiro considered all this, gave it careful thought, pulled one of the arrows he'd made out of the makeshift quiver he'd also made, slipped it into place, and charged in screaming.
Rin and Saber just stood there, stunned.
"Did he just do that?" Rin said.
"Yes," Saber said, just as disbelieving.
"Is he insane?"
"Probably."
"Why would he do that? Why would he possibly do that?"
"I'm not sure… but it seems like something we should have expected, in hindsight."
"Oh?"
"Remember how he tried to hold me back, the night I was summoned? In the face of Archer and Lancer, no less? One of whom had already killed him?"
"Lousy waste of a jewel…" Rin muttered.
"My point is, we should have realized he possessed these insane, suicidal tendencies sooner. Perhaps if he'd had more opportunities to show how he would react in battle, it would have become apparent."
"Ah. Makes sense."
They paused.
"Why are you still here, when your Master is likely going to get himself killed?"
Saber blinked, eyes going wide, her armoring snapping around her as she charged to protect her moron–, er, Master.
Rin sighed, pulled out some jewels, and, calling herself an idiot the whole while, followed.
Shiro had loosed his third arrow into the Berserker-Evangelion's roaring mouth before some part of his head finally knocked and said, Um, have you gone insane?
A Hero of Justice must do what he can to save everyone!
A Hero of Justice is a moron for just charging in like… well, a moron!
I do not have time to have pseudo-conversations with myself. I'm busy. Shut up and leave.
Oh, fine. I'll just think about how I had sex with Rin and Saber.
Are you insane?-! Do you want me to get killed?-!
No, you seem to be doing fine in that area all by yourself.
Why does everyone make fun of me!-?
I'm you, moron! Though this probably says some things about yourself…
Shiro tried to shut out his brain. It was sounding annoyingly like Archer.
"My Master, you are an idiot," was all he heard, just before Saber tackled him from behind, barely avoiding a wild sweep of the Berserker-Evangelion's hands. "Get back and let us handle this."
Shiro forced himself up. Archer and Berserker had gotten the thing's attention again, but that probably wouldn't last. "No. Rin's here, doing what she can to help. So can I."
"Rin can actually do things to help, Shiro," Saber said. "You can't. You are brave and possibly suicidally insane–"
Shiro sighed.
"– but you can't do anything," Saber continued. "And in these instances, good intentions without ability are lethal to everyone on your side. What could you possibly do?"
"See the battle in your mind!" Archer cried. "Win it in your dreams before you win it for real! If you cannot beat it, imagine what can! Go beyond the impossible and kick reason to the curb!"
Saber glared up at Archer, who was sniping little green arrows with the letters 'TNT' on them next to them. "Do you mind?" Saber said frostily. "I'm trying to be serious."
"And you look very cute when you are," Archer nodded. "Never give up! Never surrender! To infinity and beyond!"
"Will you stop drawing that thing's attention here?-!" Saber exploded. "You'll get my Master killed!"
"He seemed to be doing a good job of that by himself, from what I could see," Archer said.
Saber considered the situation, identified two targets, chose which one to threaten and made her move. "Leave," she said, Excalibur at a little lower than Archer's waist level. Shiro winced and crossed his legs reflexively.
"Leaving now," Archer said, turning to run, then paused. "Good work on that bow, kid. Now if you had a decent blueprint to copy and poured a lot more power into it, you might be able to make something useful."
Shiro sighed. "Why do people keep picking on me…?"
A dark-gloved hand picked him up, and pulled him roughly to his feet, pushing him towards the tree-line. "You seem to make it easy for them," Batman growled. "Move. Get to safety."
"But I can help–!" Shiro protested.
Batman glared. "Move…"
Shiro found himself right where he, Saber and Rin had first seen the fighting, blinking and realizing he only had a vague idea how he got there. "Americans are scary," he murmured, looking down his bow and few (pathetic) arrows.
He glared and sat down on the ground, habit making him put his bow and arrows neatly aside. Idly, he wondered what Archer meant. A blueprint? Why would you need a blueprint for a bow? Unless he meant that mental-image thing he got when he analyzed things with his magic? A conceptual blueprint? That… actually made a lot of sense. Way more sense than the stuff Archer said usually did. Seriously, aglets?
Well, as long as he was here, he might as well try it out. It seemed like good advise. So, what did he have conceptual blueprints of? Well, there was the heater from the school… but that was pretty complicated, and there isn't electricity around for him to test if he got it right. One of those wineglasses Rin had been having him practice strengthening? Goodness knows he had a 2 in 3 breakage rate, but he had the basic blueprint of all those pretty much down…
How did he make the bow again? He used a branch as a raw material… but there were no raw materials for glass around… but then, Archer never had the raw materials for swords around either. Maybe he did know more than just hot air? Shiro concentrated, seeing the 'blueprint' of the glass in his mind. His body burned as magic flowed through it. and then…
A crystal wineglass lay in his hand.
Shiro stared. And started to smile.
"All right," he murmured to himself, looking aver the battle before closing his eyes. "Let's see what else I can do…"
Hadn't he been dreaming about a sword…?
...
They'd managed to get it down to one arm on top of the damage it had already bee inflicted with. That had been good for morale, such as it was.
And all Rin could think of was, Why couldn't they have pulled his off themselves?
They'd had all night, and unlike Saber, they weren't limited. Even with Batman to hold them back, they should have been able to inflict more damage. She knew Archer has hiding things, but Berserker should have been able to make another giant robot and crush this thing! Of course, there might be limitations to that particular Noble Phantasm she wasn't aware of...
No, I had to be Archer's doing. He was up to something, the lying little sneak! All that amnesia garbage… HAH! After this was all done, she'd use a Command Seal and MAKE him tell her everything!
"…aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh…!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!"
Rin dodged the stump that tried to weep itself at her, lining up a fully charged Jewel to try and take out its center of mass, or maybe its neck.
"…aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh…!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!"
"What…?" Batman said, the barest hint of tiredness in his voice. "Is that noise…?"
Archer titled his head and said, in a vaguely Australian accent, "Crikey. It sounds very much like the battle cry of the rare 'Too Stupid To Live' Moron, a highly endangered specimen best known for earning Darwin Awards."
Rin growled at him. "Amnesia my ass…"
"Partial amnesia," Archer said. "And it's a very nice ass."
Rin punched him in the face and dodged back as the Berserker-Evangelion tried to squash them flat with its good hand.
"…AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH…!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!"
Shiro streaked by, holding a shining sword in his hands. The Berseker-Evangelion, not so stupid as to pass up a target literally charging at it in a straight line like a moron, lunged forward, its good arm sweeping around to hit.
Shiro dodged with un-Shiro-like skill, moving with a grace and reflexes that were… well, definitely not Shiro-like.
Rin stared. "What the hell?"
"…AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH…!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!"
Snagging a chink in the armored arm, Shiro leapt up, running up the appendage, sword gripped in both hands, ready to smite.
"That's…!" Saber gasped, staring at the sword in Shiro's hands. "That's my sword…!"
Archer looked at his fingers . "Three… two… one…"
Shiro tripped, falling arse over teakettle off the giant arm and barely being saved by Saber, who managed to catch him and pull him back while the others provided a distraction, his sword breaking into pieces as it hit the ground.
"Shiro, you are a moron," Saber said succinctly as he dragged him back.
"I did it!" he cried, ignoring her, staring at his hands as she dragged him off. "Did you see me? I did it! I made a sword! The one in my dreams!"
Saber paused to stare at him.
Archer patted her on the shoulder. "Not the time, Saber. Here Shiro, why don't you try it with something else…" He thrust Bakuya and Kanshou into his hands.
Shiro stared at the blades, eyes growing slightly unfocussed as he held them in his hands.
"We don't have time for this," Batman growled, now really cranky.
There was a flicker as a second set of blades appeared in Shiro's hands.
Archer patted him on the head as he stared in wonder. "Well done, flea. Now, on to the second lesson: making them go BOOM. Observe. "
Archer threw both blades at the Berserker-Evangelion. Their link made them come together as they flew, impacting opposite sides of the working forearm. It wasn't able to penetrate the armor, but it left a good dent anda big stain.
Shiro threw. The blades wobbled in the air, slapped together and sort of came apart like clay.
"Work on it," Archer advised. "Next time, recreate everything. Hopefully, I didn't just cause a paradox."
"What?" Shiro asked.
"Nothing. Why is there human reproductive ejaculant on my Master's thighs?"
Shiro flushed, looking as if he expected Archer to smite him dead.
Rin punched Archer again, and then Shiro for good measure. "STOP TALKING AND HELP HERE! I'm taking out the head! Maybe that'll keep it from seeing us! Who knows, I might get lucky."
"Didn't you all ready get–"
Rin punched Archer again.
Archer sighed. "Stay behind me, kid," he said. "Trace, on!"
Black and white blades in hand, Archer charged, Shiro clumsily imitating him as the Servant tried to distract the thing while Berserker, Batman and Saber covered the other areas, giving the Invader too many targets. The Invader responded by rearing back and trying to squash them all by falling on them, which they all barely avoided. It's head struck the ground as gravity did it's work, and it started clumsily trying to lever itself back on it's knees.
Rin charged up her gem and threw, managing to get it through the thing's open mouth. "That is such a stupid design flaw!" she cried as it's head mostly exploded.
It kept on trying to stand, even as a hint of red glinted from the ruined skull.
"The red core's in its neck!" Archer cried. "Or at least where the top of the brains stem would be! We need to hi it again! Quick!"
"Trace, on!" Shiro cried, the sword he'd made appearing again in his hands. Up close, it seemed… incomplete, somehow, unfinished, as if it were hollow.
"That's my line!" Archer said. "And don't you remember the last time you tried that?"
Saber reached out and grabbed the sword. Shiro, surprised, held firm. They stared at each other across it.
"I can be useful," Shiro said. "The sword would collapse without me here."
Saber sighed. "Can you run like that again?"
Shiro did, Saber a heartbeat behind. They charged the Invader, holding the same sword…
They leapt, bringing it down to bear on the gleaming red spot. Both the crimson part and the sword shattered on impact…
And finally, the giant Invader began to dissolve…
...
Saber barely managed to land Shiro safely before she collapsed herself, obviously exhausted. Around them, their enemy dissolved into what looked like black dust, wasting away. Archer let out a sigh of relief.
At his side, Rin poked him. "You," she began angrily, "have a lot of explaining to do!"
From the woods to one side, a silver, snake-like streak erupted, darting for the fallen forms of Saber and Shiro.
Archer blurred, a long blade suddenly in his hand as he deflected the sudden attack, throwing it off and causing it to gouge a long streak along the ground.
"What now?" Batman asked, annoyed.
Three figures emerged from the woods: a woman, a child, and what looked like a wolf from hell.
"Wolkenritter, I presume," Archer said quietly over his shoulder. "Get out of here, Saber. Grab Shiro, grab Rin, and run. You're too weak to fight now, and these people look like they want to fight."
"Archer…" Saber said, voice tired but determined.
"Go, your Majesty," Archer said quietly. "Let this knight handle this. You have others you need to protect."
Saber looked pained, but began dragging Shiro off.
"Berserker, make sure they gat back to the castle safely!" Archer said, raising his voice, not looking away from the three. The pink-haired woman in the lead stared at him coldly, only a few patches of pink in her dark, red-veined armor. As he watched, the last vestiges of blue faded from one eye, becoming completely gold.
"Archer!" he heard Rin cry. "What do you think you're doing!-?"
"Protecting you, dumbass!" Archer called back. "Berserker, get her out of here!"
"We're not finished, Archer!" Rin cried as Berserker audibly dragged her away. "I'll get the truth out of you if I have to drag it out!"
The child in the black dress and skull-emblazoned hat dashed towards those trying to run, but Archer was ahead of her, the nodachi in his hands flashing. "In Celebration of Elegant Swordswoman AngelGARd's First Kiss With Her Maguis Albus Ojou-sama Strike."
The attack tore into Vita, red-veined black cloth exploding off and reverting to deep red as she stumbled back, shocked. One blue and one gold eye stared in confusion.
"You are not getting to them," Archer said simply. "Not unless it's over my dead body."
Signum drew her sword, and Laevatein caught the morning light. "That can be arranged."
Archer smiled. "I forgive you, Rein…" he whispered.
...
- To be continued...
...
A/N: Shiro's practicing with wineglasses. Because it seems really stupid to start with antique lamps.
I'd make the scene where Shiro learns initial Tracing better… except the anime and the original game itself is just as lame in the area… The scene were he perfects Tracing, however, is much better.
Lots of reviews, please! And check out the TvTropes Pages!
Until next time, this is Shadow, signing off.