WELCOME BACK CRAZIES.
Hagrid - Back ter where?
DUDE.
Hagrid - Yeah?
SHUT UP.
Cedric - -raises hand-
WHAT?!
Cedric - -puts hand down- Never mind.
Harry - -raises hand-
WHAT NOW, FOUR EYES?!
Harry - -notices my own glasses- Well, one, you shouldn't be talking. -shoves glasses up his nose- And two, Voldemort's—
Everyone but Harry, me, Voldemort - Tremble tremble tremble tremble!
Harry - -stares- He's got a juice box.
Voldemort - You WISH you had a juice box! -drinks juice very loudly-
VOLDEMORT, SHUT UP. HARRY, SHUT UP EVEN MORE.
Harry - …?
Ron - -snores-
WAKE UP!!
Ron - -grunts, continues sleeping-
WELL WHILE I STRANGLE RON IN HIS SLEEP, HERE IS LUNA SINGING THIS IS ME BY DEMI LOVATO. YES WER'RE SINGING DISNEY. GET OVER IT.
Luna - I've always been the kind of girl that hid my face so afraid to tell the world what I've got to say but I have this dream right inside of me I'm gonna let it show, it's time to let you know to let you know this is real, this is me I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be now gonna let the light shine on me now I've found who I am there's no way to hold it in no more hiding who I want to be this is me
JUDGES?
Hagrid - Bloody brilliant.
McGonagall - I agree with Hagrid.
Dumbledore - I'd like an encore. :D
Snape - I fail to see the point in this song. Fifty points from Ravenclaw, Miss Lovegood.
Luna - Well -insert swearing that you'd never expect Luna to say here- you!
Everyone but Luna and Voldemort - O_O
O_O UH…WELL UH HERE IS VOLDEMORT SINGING…*laughs* FABULOUS FROM HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL. –laughs uncontrollably-
Voldemort - -whispers 'damn Muggle'- It's out with the old and in with the new good-bye clouds of grey, hello skies of blue a dip in the pool, a trip to the spa endless days in my chaise the whole world according to moi excuse me thank you iced tea imported from England, lifeguards imported from Spain, towels imported from Turkey, and turkey imported from Maine we're gonna relax and renew, you, go, do I want fabulous, that is my simple request, all things fabulous, bigger and better and best, I need something inspiring to help me get along, I need a little fabulous is that so wrong?
Judges - -crickets chirping-
Hagrid - Uh…
Snape - Why is he in this competition anyway?
Dumbledore - -standing and clapping- BRAVO!
McGonagall - Oh, for Pete's sake, Albus, sit down!
Amos Diggory - -randomly runs through- I DO NOT APPROVE OF THIS COMPETITION! UNLESS MY SON WINS! I STILL LIKE IKE!
I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO GET LOST!
Cedric – I was hoping he would…
Me and Amos - SHUT UP!
Cedric Okay, that's just freaky.
YOUR MOM'S JUST FREAKY.
Cedric - …I know.
Amos - Hey! That's my wife you're talking about!
…DUDE, JUST GET LOST.
Amos - …Okay. –leaves-
OKAY, NOW, LET'S GET BACK TO THE COMPETITION WITH RON SINGING SOME SONG CALLED HEY BY MITCHEL MUSSO. ENJOY OR I'LL GET VOLDY TO AVADA KEDAVRA YOU.
Voldemort - Avada kedavr-
NOT NOW. AND I HEARD YOU CALL ME A MUGGLE!
Voldemort - Oh.
Ron - I'm counting the days since I began to live without you I'm covered in rain but it feels just like it's the sun and it don't get me down, don't come around you're better off leaving town, I'm fine here alone now without you hey I'm screaming at you, hey don't care enough to write you a letter now that I'm doing better alone hey I'm screaming at you, hey don't care enough to write you a letter now that I'm doing better, better off without you
Dumbledore - Excellent, Mr. Weasley, you may resume your seat.
McGonagall - I think at parts you tended to scream more than necessary, but it was alright regardless.
Hagrid - Good song fer ya, Ron.
Snape - I did not like it. Fifty points.
McGonagall - Of course you didn't, Severus.
WHILE THE JUDGES DUKE IT OUT, HERE IS HERMIONE WITH HE COULD BE THE ONE BY HANNAH MONTANA.
Hermione - -blows kisses to Ron- This is for you, Ron!
Ron - -shouting at Harry- I TOLD YOU SHE'D DEDICATE IT TO ME!
Hermione - Smooth talkin' so rockin' and he's got everything that a girl's wantin' guitar cutie he plays it groovy and I can't help myself from doin' something stupid think I'm really falling for his smile got butterflies when he says my name he's got something special he's got something special and when he's lookin' at me I wanna get all sentimental he's got something special he's got something special I can hardly breathe something's telling me telling me maybe he could be the one he could be the one he could be the one he could be the one he could be the one he could be the one
Snape - Have we not had enough with the sappy love songs already?
McGonagall - Well, that's not exactly a sappy song, Severus.
Snape - Ten points from Gryffindor for Minerva's comment.
McGonagall - -spits in Snape's eye-
Dumbledore - I thought it was good, you definitely have potential.
Hagrid - Who was she singing about?
Everyone - -slowly turns and stares at Hagrid-
DUDE, SERIOUSLY?
Hagrid - 'Seriously', what?
NEVER MIND. DIP. ANYWHORE, NOW LET'S GET CEDRIC UP HERE BEFORE I GET VOLDEMORT TO AVADA KEDAVRA YOU TO HELL.
Voldemort - Avada keda-
WILL YOU STOP TRYING TO KILL PEOPLE?! ANYWHORE, CEDRIC IS SINGING TONIGHT BY THE JONAS BROTHERS.
Cedric - Well here we…
WHICH JUST SO HAPPENS TO BE MY FAVORITE BY THEM.
Cedric - -_-
JUST SAYING. GO AHEAD.
Cedric - Well here we are again throwing punch lines, no one wins as the morning sun begins to rise, we're fading fast and we won't work this out no, we're not gonna work this out tonight (we won't work this out) no, we're not gonna make this right so I'll give a kiss and say goodbye (give a kiss good-bye) cause we're not gonna work this out tonight
Dumbledore - I do like knitting patterns.
Cedric - What's that got to do with anything?
Dumbledore - I just felt like sharing.
McGonagall - Thank you, Mr. Diggory. And Albus there are certain things you should keep to yourself.
Hagrid - Like what you did at the last teacher's meetin—
Snape, McGonagall, other teachers - Oh God, disgusting, what, that's sickening, etc.
Snape - Ignoring Dumbledore's comment…I hope every one of you gets into a horrible accident on the way home.
O-O OH…KAY…THEN, SNAPE-A-DOODLE.
Snape - What did you call me?!
WELL NOW HERE IS HARRY SINGING TRUE FRIEND BY HANNAH MONTANA.
Snape - WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?!
ENJOY.
Harry - We sign our cards and letters BFF you've got a million ways to make me laugh you're looking out for me you've got my back it's so good to have you around you know the secrets I could never tell and when I'm quiet you break through my shell don't feel no need to do a rebel yeah cause you keep my feet on the ground you're a true friend you're here till the end you pull me aside when somethin' ain't right talk with me now and into the night till it's alright again you're a true friend
Ron - Epic, mate.
Harry - Thanks, Ron.
McGonagall - That was good, Mr. Potter. Albus, please, keep your comments to yourself.
Dumbledore - Awww…! :'[
Snape - Fifteen points from Gryffindor.
Harry - You've got to be joking.
Snape - Thirty.
Hagrid - Where's the duct tape when you need it?
WELL, I DON'T KNOW, HAGRID. -hides duct tape behind back- WELL HERE ARE FRED AND GEORGE SINGING LIVE TO PARTY BY THE JONAS BROTHERS. PLEASE DON'T THROW ROTTEN FRUIT OR I'LL THROW A GRENADE. KAY THANKS.
Fred and George - I was sittin' at home watchin TV all alone I'm so tired of reruns, I've memorized this show so I pick up the phone, call everyone I know said there's gonna be a party, hit the music here we go yeah you gotta live to party, bust your move everybody's in the groove tell the DJ to play my song are you ready to rock and roll
McGonagall - Sounds a lot like you around exam times.
Snape - Agreed. Fifteen points.
Dumbledore - -dances strangely-
Hagrid - -joins in dancing-
Everyone other than Hagrid, Dumbledore, Fred, George - O.e
Malfoy - -from audience- Boo! You stink!
-throws grenade- CAN'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YA.
Malfoy - MY FACE!
WELL UH TO FINISH US OFF HERE IS NEVILLE SINGING LET'S MAKE THIS LAST FOREVER BY MITCHEL MUSSO AS OLIVER OKEN. LOLZ. :p
Neville - Will you still pay me if I do this?
Cedric - She's paying you?
Neville - To sing a song that was on Hannah Montana, yes.
Cedric - You're not gonna get paid.
Neville - I figured as much.
CAN YOU HURRY UP AND SING ALREADY?
Neville - I need a kick drum a guitar now and a bass line and imma show you how how to rock how to dance how to get down and all I need is a piano in my track now throw your hands throw your hands throw your hands throw your hands up (whoa ohoh, whoa ohoh) cause you can't cause you can't cause you can't cause you can't stop (whoa ohoh, whoa ohoh) can you hear me (hey) do you feel it (hey) if you with me (oh)
1-2-3 cause we're here and we're now and we're all together so let's make this last forever
Snape - Five hundred points from Gryffindor.
YOU'RE JUST ANGRY THAT THE STUDENT FROM YOUR OWN HOUSE WAS VOTED OFF.
Snape - So?
Hagrid - That was kinda catchy.
Dumbledore - You bet it is! -starts singing off key-
McGonagall - Albus, shush. This competition is for the students.
WELL PLEASE VOTE FOR YOUR FAVORITES OR I'LL CUT OFF THEIR LEFT EAR AND SHOVE IT IN THEIR FACES. ;]
Cedric - …Pleasant.
WHOOPS DON'T CARE.
Cedric - Do you use every chance you get to insult me?
I'M SORRY, COULD YOU REPEAT THAT? ALL I HEARD WAS 'DO YOU USE EVERY CHANCE BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH'!J
Cedric - You see!
Harry - Wow, dude. Your life does suck. You should join FML.
Cedric - I have. And I've submitted stories. Several times.
Harry - Total FML.
BOTH OF YOU, SHUT UP! THANK YOU!