A/N: Thanks again for all your continuing support for this story. The response has dropped since chapter eight, both view and review wise, but I expected as much, and it just makes me all the more grateful for the few of you who do leave me reviews after reading.

I'm going to continue to try and reply to you all (aside from those of you who review as guests or have private messaging switched off), but I've got a really busy week coming up with a new job and uni work, so I apologise in advance if I don't manage it!

Enjoy! xx

Funny, you're the broken one,

but I'm the only one who needed saving…
Stay – Rihanna

I woke up before Bella the next morning feeling more rested than I had in weeks despite the early hour. My body ached from carrying so much tension for so long, but I felt lighter, more in control. And it was all because of her.

Now I could think straighter, I realized just how foolish I had been to hold everything in for that long. I had almost lost it, almost lost us Jasper, a potential ally, but worst of all, I'd almost lost Bella. I was used to dealing with things myself after years of being unable to talk to anyone, unable to be honest… but I hadn't realized just how bad a job I was doing at coping until she came and showed me what it could be like to have someone to share the load with.

In the compound, she had always been there for me; after Felix and Demetri, after my call with Carlisle, after everything bad… but then suddenly she was gone, and I was on my own again. Even now that I had her back, things had changed between us. I had changed. I had begun to revert into the person I was before she came into my life. Bitter, broken, hate-filled, distrusting…

It was like slipping into an old skin, but it was one that didn't quite fit anymore, not since Bella had managed to get under it. And now, I found myself hoping like hell that skin wouldn't fit ever again. I didn't want to be that person.

But, damn it, it was difficult; old habits die hard, after all.

Baby steps, just like Bella had to take.

With a soft sigh, I sat upright and turned so my legs could hang over the edge of the bed. I had tried to move quietly to avoid waking Bella up, but heard the sheets rustle anyway, and cursed myself for disturbing her.

"Edward?"

"I'm…" Okay, I wanted to say. Instead, I chose to be honest. "Thinking."

Bella's hand came to rest on my arm, and I moved my own to cover it, squeezing her fingers gently.

"What about?" she asked softly.

"Everything." I swallowed hard, suddenly unsure of myself, then turned my head to look at her. "I want to try and talk to you about things… but I don't know where to start."

"You don't have to say anything right now," she murmured. "Only when you need or want to. Don't force it."

I nodded, looking back down at my lap. "Can I, uh… Can I ask you something?"

Bella hummed in affirmation.

"Do you… miss it?"

"Miss what?"

I could picture the furrow of her brow.

"The compound." I heard Bella move closer behind me, but didn't look up. "The way things were, in there? Not the… danger aspect, of course, but… the closeness? How open we were sometimes?"

Her lips came to rest against my shoulder as she pressed her chest against my back, legs either side of mine. My free hand moved down to her thigh automatically, tracing patterns across her skin.

"A little," she replied quietly, words like a confession against my skin. "I miss being with you… the moments of peace we managed to steal… Things were simpler there, I guess."

"Yeah," I agreed.

Strange how being trapped in behind enemy lines with constant surveillance could feel simpler than being back in the outside world.

"Why do you ask?"

"I guess I didn't realize how different things were before," I murmured. "We're free, but we have less freedom now. Everything seems so much more…"

"Real," she finished, pressing a kiss to my shoulder. I squeezed her hand, unable to find words to say.

"We don't touch as much," Bella said softly after a moment, sliding her free arm round my waist. "I think that adds to the distance. Before, we were always in contact somehow, even when it was all for show, just because we could be…"

"Bella…" I turned round and met her gaze. She smiled sadly, reaching up to run her fingers through my hair. I sighed, eyes drifting shut as the fingers of her other hand untangled from mine and slowly ran up my arm.

"This is enough for me," she breathed. "Recently, I've been so selfish with you, and you've let me be, but-"

"Selfish?" I frowned. "How?"

"I've allowed you to focus on what I need and what I want since you saved me, but never actually asked you what you need."

"I just need you," I told her honestly. She breathed out a soft laugh, her smile genuine. "I'm going to try and let you in more. I know I'm not exactly easy to handle right now, and-"

"Baby, please don't think I'm saying-"

"I know you're worried about me," I soothed, reaching for her hand again and bringing it up to my lips. "Just don't turn into me, alright? Don't start hiding things to try and stop me worrying."

She looked down at her lap guiltily, chewing on her bottom lip.

"Bella?"

She already was hiding things from me.

"My leg is…" She shook her head. "It's healing, but it hurts so badly sometimes that I can't walk. And I'm still having nightmares when you're on watch."

I swallowed my guilt. I hadn't realized her nightmares were still bad, and even though I knew her leg wasn't at full strength, I had no idea it was causing her that much pain… but instead of beating myself up about it, I decided to try being honest back.

"I can't sleep, and when I do I have nightmares, too." I replied. Baby steps. "My shoulder hurts like Hell, and recently I've noticed my range of motion's shit."

A soft laugh burst from her lips and she gave me a teary smile. That's better.

"We're a mess," she murmured.

"Yeah… We are," I breathed, smiling back. "We'll figure things out, with time."

"I hope so," she sighed. I slowly leaned closer, gaze dropping down to her lips and back up again.

"We will." I had to believe that. "But first… I wanna be selfish."

My lips met hers before she could reply, and her answering moan told me all I needed to know. She needed this too.

As Bella wove her fingers into my hair, her free hand trailed up my chest and curled into my t-shirt, tugging me closer. I deepened the kiss, carefully guiding Bella back down onto the bed so I could hover above her, relishing in the feel of her against me.

Bella brought the knee of her good leg up to my hip, then let out a breathy moan as I reached down and pulled the other one up to wrap around me. She pulled me closer with her legs, not allowing for any space between us, and the hand which wasn't in my hair slid up my waist, searching for purchase.

Smiling against her lips, I took her hand in mine and lightly pressed it into the mattress, just above her head. Bella's fingers splayed against my own, then squeezed tightly as I gently took her bottom lip between both of mine, teasing it with my teeth.

"Edward," she gasped, rolling her hips upwards into mine. When I pushed down to meet her, her head fell back against the pillows and I didn't hesitate to trail kisses along her jaw, gently sucking the area below her ear before making my way down to her neck.

"Oh…" she breathed. Her hand tightened in my hair briefly, then guided my lips back to hers. Her tongue traced my bottom lip before coaxing them to part, and I forgot myself, reaching down with the hand that wasn't holding hers to trace the curve of her waist over her sleep shirt…

My shoulder burned in protest and I grunted in pain, pressing my hand back down onto the mattress to support myself again, but the damage had been done. I silently cursed, ready to move off her, but Bella didn't hesitate.

In one smooth move, she rolled us over onto our sides, taking any weight off my shoulder, then kissed me again, refusing to deny us this moment. I breathed in deeply, trying to focus on her instead of the pain, only to release that breath in a gasp when Bella's hand reached up and pressed against my shoulder.

I groaned softly into her mouth as her hand began to gently massage the sore muscles, careful to avoid my scars, but still somehow managing to drain the tension from the area bit by bit. Taking care not to move my arm too suddenly, I slowly reached for her hip, pulling her closer as she continued to massage my shoulder, then pressed my forehead to hers as the pressure increased.

"That okay?" she breathed. Eyes closed, I nodded, unable to describe how amazing it felt.

"You're so tense here," she muttered, fingers rubbing over the same area to try and ease it. "Damn it."

"Bella…"

"Sit up?" she asked softly, moving away to allow me to move. I did as she asked, then watched as she shifted round to my side, legs tucked beneath her.

Before I could ask what she was doing, she started massaging my shoulders again, with both hands this time. I let my head drop forwards, lips parted and eyes closed, absorbing the sensations.

"I know I'm not a physiotherapist, but can you put this arm out straight in front of you please?" she murmured after a moment. I did so easily, but when she asked me to raise that arm straight up, I groaned in pain, feeling my shoulder seize in protest.

"I felt that," she muttered. "Fuck, Edward…"

I let her guide me through several motions to test how well my shoulder responded, frustration growing more and more with every failed attempt. Some movements were okay, but others were just too painful or almost impossible.

Months down the line… you won't be able to carry your baby as your arm will be fucked. Aimee's words from the Oregon center came back to haunt me.

"Bella, stop," I eventually sighed. I heard her clear her throat, then allowed her to slowly lower my arm back down to my side before taking her hand in mine.

"Baby…" she almost whimpered, curling herself against my side, lips pressing against my scarred skin.

"I know," I ground out, "but it's my own fault."

"No, it's n-not." Bella squeezed my hand tightly. "It's theirs."

I tilted my head so it rested against hers and brought my free hand around to stroke her arm, only to find it trembling beneath my fingers.

"We'll h-have to tr-try and fin-nd some wa-ay to start g-getting that- range- of- m-motion b-back," Bella stuttered.

Oh, fuck…

"Bella," I soothed, turning to face her and cupping her cheek in one hand as the other remained holding hers. "It's alright."

"N-N-No, it's n-n-not." Her breaths were fast, and I could feel her shaking.

"Hey…" I breathed, tilting her chin up to meet her gaze. She was scared.

Ignoring how my shoulder twinged, I reached out and pulled her into my lap, letting her legs straighten out sideways across me. Her arms immediately wrapped round me, and I held her just as tightly back, burying my face in her hair as she inhaled a shuddered breath.

"Why didn't you s-say?"

"I was stupid," I murmured. "I pushed it to the back of my mind."

"Edward," she moaned.

"I know."

My shoulder was worse than I'd realized, but I couldn't exactly go back and change things now.

You fucking idiot.

I clamped my eyes shut, like that would block out the thoughts running through my mind, and focused so hard on keeping calm that I almost missed Bella's next words.

"… or something."

I cleared my throat, trying to refocus. "Sorry?"

"I s-said we should go to a doctor or something," Bella repeated, voice worryingly quiet.

"You know we can't do that," I sighed. "It's not worth risking everybody's safety."

"You'd let us go if I needed something for the b-baby," she countered.

She was right.

"That's different," I replied weakly.

"Not to me." Bella straightened up slightly, gaze defiant as it met mine. "I'm going to need a scan soon. We can do both at the same time."

"I-" I began to protest, but she quickly cut me off.

"Don't even," she said firmly, bringing her hand up to my chest. I held her stare for a moment, then nodded in defeat.

"Fine."

"You promise?" she asked, tone vulnerable.

"When have I ever broken a promise?" I replied, not realizing the implications until Bella pulled back, expression guilty.

"You haven't."

You're not going to do anything stupid, are you?... 'I won't do anything that I don't have to. I swear…'

'Code black… Tell them that I'm sure. Please. Promise me?' … I promise.

I swallowed against the unwanted memories and pressed Bella tightly back against me, hating how she resisted.

"That's the past," I whispered into her hair. Then why is it still haunting our future? "And… I forgive you."

Bella's answering whimper solidified the words as truth.

"How can you?" She looked up at me through tear-filled eyes, expression disbelieving. I gently pushed a stray strand of hair back from her cheek, letting my fingers linger against her skin.

"I love you," I answered simply, because it was true. I wouldn't be able to move on - would never trust her again - without forgiving her first.

All Bella's breath seemed to leave her at once, and the expression on her face as my words sunk in… hopeful, wrecked and relieved all at the same time. I lowered my lips to hers, then groaned as she kissed me back almost desperately, fingers curling into my hair again as she pulled herself closer.

Maybe she' d needed to hear those words just as much as I'd needed to mean them.

As Bella and I made our way downstairs some time later, we could just about hear Jasper and Emmett's voices coming from the kitchen, but I didn't rush, focusing instead on getting Bella down one step at a time. Now that I knew her leg was causing her pain, it was far easier to notice the signs, and I had insisted on supporting her as we walked to join the others so that she didn't overexert herself even more.

"…'s probably not the best plan…"

"What if we tried…"

"… asked Edward?"

At the sound of our footsteps in the hallway, the conversation stopped, and within moments Rosalie stepped through the entryway to meet us.

"Hey," she greeted softly, smiling. "How are you feeling?"

"Better," I replied. "Thank you."

"Do you need help?" she asked, gesturing to Bella, who shook her head.

"We got it," Bella assured her, flashing Rose a strained smile.

"Do you want coffee, Edward? There's a fresh pot," Rose wondered as we followed her into the kitchen.

"No, thanks," I replied, smiling back at her. Emmett and Jasper raised their mugs in greeting from their positions around the counter island, wide awake despite it barely being past seven in the morning.

"Okay, well… we were just about to start breakfast, if you want some?" she offered instead.

Bella let out a soft laugh, then grimaced as she pushed herself onto one of the chairs set up by the counter island in the middle of the room. "Sure, that would be nice, Rose."

"Sleep okay?" Emmett wondered, looking to me. I nodded, then shot a pointed glance in Bella's direction. His face softened in understanding. "You look tired, Bells."

"Exactly what every woman wants to hear first thing in the morning," Bella joked, rolling her eyes at him before looking over her shoulder for me. I immediately realized what she wanted, and quickly moved to stand beside her, placing my hand on the small of her back. She sighed softly, leaning into the touch, then settled her gaze on Jasper.

"Everything alright, Jazz?" she asked quietly.

"I'm fine, darlin'," he assured her. "Emmett and I were actually just discussing how we might be able to put a plan in motion."

Rose shot him a pointed look.

"But that can wait until after we've eaten," Emmett added, then took a sip of his coffee.

"Eggshells aren't needed, guys," Bella told them, realizing what they were doing. "Thanks for trying, but-"

"They're right," I interrupted, rubbing her back soothingly. "It can wait half an hour."

Jasper's eyebrows went up in surprise. I know, I almost wanted to say. I'm surprised at me, too.

"I know I've been putting everyone on edge lately, and I'm sorry," I said to the room, making eye contact with Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper in turn. "I'm working on that. But for now, let's try and get through one meal without discussing our situation? I think we all need to breathe for a moment."

Rose's smile was relieved as she gathered the eggs for breakfast, and I saw Emmett grin over the edge of his coffee cup.

"Alright," Jasper agreed. "One meal, then back to business. We can't afford to lose too much time."

I nodded in understanding, then bent down to kiss the top of Bella's head and forced myself not to smile when she curled her fingers through one of the belt loops of my jeans in response.

True to their word, nobody mentioned anything about The Volturi, Jane, Alec, or anything else related to our fucked up situation during breakfast, and I could almost imagine what our future could be like once everything was over. We had steady friends for life in Rosalie and Emmett, and Jasper was bound to Bella through Jake and Alice, connecting us all in strange ways.

But the peace couldn't last forever, and soon we were moving back into the lounge to discuss a plan. I helped Bella to the sofa and took my place beside her, gently laying one hand on her thigh as she leaned in to me. Rose and Emmett took the sofa opposite us, but Jasper remained standing, leaning against the unused fireplace with a fresh cup of coffee in his hand. It was almost a mirror of the previous night, only this time the atmosphere was filled with a different kind of tension.

"So…" I began tentatively. "What were you discussing before we came down?"

"Jasper thinks he might be able to track down Alec and Jane," Emmett told us. Bella tensed beside me.

"H-How and why would we do that?" Bella said slowly. Stay strong, baby.

"You remember Peter?" Jasper replied. Bella nodded. "He might be able to hack into security cams around the city, get us the info we need to track them down. If we do that… we can take them out, maybe use them to gather intel on what The Volturi are planning."

"They're too much of a threat to leave," Emmett continued. "Both to us and to the public. Better to find them first than the other way round."

"What makes you think they'll talk?" I asked, frowning. "They won't respond to torture – they deal it out on a day to day basis."

"Doesn't mean they've been on the receiving end of it," Jasper pointed out. "You said they're twins, right? We can use them against each other."

"It's risky," Bella murmured. "Jasper, are you sure Peter will be able to manage that?"

"He owes me a favor," Jasper replied, then looked to me and Emmett. "He was a friend of mine back when I was in the army. Computer genius, could hack into almost anything within minutes."

"I thought he retired?" Bella's brow furrowed.

"Do people like us ever fully retire?"

Bella shrugged. "Good point."

"Okay, say we do manage to track down the twins… What are the chances they'll be guarded? Felix and Demetri survived both hits on the compound, Edward; would they be assigned to the twins?" Emmett wondered.

"No." I shook my head. "Aro would want them with him or maybe James. They're too valuable."

"James…" Bella muttered, shuddering. I rubbed her thigh reassuringly.

"I know I'm the weakest link in the chain here," Rosalie began, "but if we track them, how do we get them under our control? They won't come easy."

"We'd need bait if we wanted to bring them to us," Jasper admitted.

"I could do it?" Bella suggested. "I need to go in for a scan at some point anyway, and Edward needs his shoulder checked out, so why not be obvious about it? Choose a clinic near where they're hiding out and draw them in?"

"That's risky," Emmett pointed out. "If The Volturi are somehow guarding them and something backfired…"

"I know, but-"

"It's a stupid idea." I turned to Bella, trying to remain calm. She looked at back me, frustrated.

"Edward, it would work!"

"No." I shook my head. "You are not risking your safety again. Do you understand me?"

"You'd be with me," she protested.

"And what if something happened?" I countered. "Are you seriously going to tell me you would run if I told you to? That you wouldn't give yourself up to them to protect us?"

Her expression morphed into one of pure hurt.

"I can't trust you in a situation like that," I confessed, taking her hand in mine. "I want to, Bella, but I also know you. I won't risk losing you again."

"I agree, darlin'," Jasper said softly. "Your sacrificial streak is a mile wide, and I think we'd all be worryin' about you too much to focus."

"We have to do something to draw them out," Bella protested, but she squeezed my hand tightly, the fight gone from her.

"Or we could take them down on their own turf?" I suggested. "If we tracked them to wherever they're staying, we could wait for them there, surprise attack?"

"That could work," Jasper agreed. "It's potentially risky; there would be no guarantee the place would be empty, but… it is a better alternative."

"What would we do with them after?" Rose asked warily.

"Oh, they won't be surviving the interrogation," Jasper replied casually. In that, we agreed. "We'll dissolve 'em, maybe leave one for The Volturi to find, let them know we're coming for them? They'll be dead either way."

Bella shuddered, curling into my side. "Good."

"Then there's James to deal with," Emmett reminded us. "Especially now we know who he wants."

"Bella," I sighed.

"What?" Bella turned to look at me, aghast. Oh, fuck, she still didn't know about the photo.

"When Emmett first found out about the leak, he discovered something," I told her quietly. "When James escaped our custody, he left a message on the wall… He said he was coming for you, and we think he may have known where we were."

Bella gasped, eyes widening with fear.

"No…" she whispered. "I thought… No…"

"Bells," Emmett began, but Bella cut him off.

"You didn't think that m-maybe I m-might need to kn-know that?!"

"We were a little distracted by the sirens to tell you!" Emmett countered. Rose put a hand on his arm to calm him.

Bella buried her face in her hands, curling protectively over her stomach. "Oh, my God."

"This is why we couldn't trust The Agency," I told her softly, running my hand up and down her back. "He knew exactly where you were, what you were doing..."

"It had to be someone in the Oregon center," Rosalie pointed out.

"Or Carlisle," I replied. Everybody went quiet in contemplation.

"I feel sick," I heard Bella mutter.

"I'll go get you some water." Rosalie hurried to the kitchen, probably grateful to escape the mounting tension.

"This is why we need to be careful," Jasper sighed. "This stress is dangerous for the baby, darlin'."

"He's right," Rosalie said softly as she reentered the room, handing me a glass of water to give to Bella. "Any kind of stress or strain could harm the baby, especially after what you've already been through."

Emmett reached for her instinctually, eyes sad. She'd told him.

"If he uses a phone, we might be able to track him, too," Jasper assured Bella.

"Volturi phones can't be traced," I replied. "Trust me. The only record of whose phone is whose isn't accessible to anyone but the top few, and even if we somehow did get access, it's still encoded. No names, just numbers."

"We could still try," Jasper suggested. "We just need to be smart about it."

"Marcus…" Bella muttered, taking the glass from my hand and drinking a small sip of water. "He could get us access."

"Maybe," I admitted. "But to get to Marcus, we'd have to go through The Agency."

"Shit," Emmett breathed.

"Exactly," I agreed.

"Wait…" Jasper seemed to mull something over for a moment before continuing, "If Marcus could get us access to their database or network… Peter might be able to get us more info on The Volturi as a whole, maybe even enough to bring that entire house of cards down. If we could decode the names…"

"Rose, what was in that folder you found?" Bella wondered, looking up.

"A bunch of names… numbers… A couple of property deeds and stuff… I never really…"

"The Denali's had intel like that, too," I remembered. "But they're in Agency hands now, and so is their info."

"No matter what we do, we'll need Carlisle at some point," Bella sighed.

"There are too many variables right now." Jasper set down his empty mug. "We need to take out the immediate threat first."

"The twins," I agreed. Jasper nodded.

"And Bella needs her scan," Rosalie added. "We're overdue a supply run anyway…"

"What about Alice and Jake?" Bella asked quietly, looking to Jasper. "Are they safe with you gone?"

"I'd feel more comfortable if we were with them, but I can't risk exposing them to the twins."

Bella nodded in understanding and settled back into my side, seeking comfort once again.

"Once they're out the way, we can join Alice in Arizona. That safe house is more secure than this one," Jasper continued.

"Arizona?" I felt my eyebrow raise.

"I was settling things up in Seattle when I got the message," Jasper told me. "That's how I got here so fast."

"Right," I muttered.

"How soon can you get in touch with this Peter guy?" Emmett asked.

"A couple of days?" Jasper guessed. "He's gone pretty far underground, but I know how to reach him."

"Then let's do it," I replied.

"I'll have to reach out to him alone," Jasper warned. "He's not exactly the most trusting of people."

"You're gonna have to leave," Bella realized.

"I'll be back," he promised. "Give me one day, maybe two, and I'll make contact."

"Alright," Bella ceded.

"In the meantime, I suggest we stock up. Food, supplies… anything we might need for the next couple of weeks," Jasper put forward. "While we're tracking the twins, it would be foolish to leave unless absolutely necessary."

"I'll check free clinics around town, see if maybe we could take Bella for her scan before things get too rough," Rosalie offered.

"Your shoulder," Bella murmured worriedly. "We need to get that checked, too. And Emmett… your ribs."

"One step at a time," Emmett replied. "That baby comes first."

Bella's hand curved round her stomach.

"Okay, Emmett, Rose… We can take my car."

"What about us?" Bella protested.

"Someone has to stay," Jasper countered. "And no offense, but if The Volturi do have eyes looking for the four of you, it's your two faces that they'll recognize first."

He had a point.

"Okay, but if anything feels wrong…"

"We'll come right back," Jasper promised, smiling reassuringly.

And, as I watched the three of them drive away in Jasper's car just under an hour later, I found myself trusting that they would.