Chapter 10 - Dust to Dust

Sheldon explained the situation to Callisto in simple terms, "Now, I can see you like this game, and I like games too, so I will play with you, but only for a short time. My friends, here, will become cross if we don't leave soon. You understand?"

Callisto chuckled her delight. "Let the game commence. I wouldn't want to delay your passage."

Sookie kept watching Sheldon, who nodded his agreement and said, "Alright, I'll begin." He cleared his throat. "Your act of aggression – I mean the thyrsus thrust, in case you are uncertain - must be met with swift and cruel ferocity."

The maenad looked bemused and amused, but she didn't for one second take her eyes off Sheldon's. She wanted her tribute.

In a first move, Sheldon brought his forefingers up to his temples, next to his eyes. In his second move, he squinted and hunched his body over, until he resembled a praying mantis with a serious eye disorder. What could be seen of Sheldon's eyes flickered red, reflecting the hot-lava look that must have been the maenad's.

"Fascinating," said Sheldon, keeping right on staring into the maenad's fiery eyes. Sookie couldn't imagine what he was seeing or feeling, but he seemed to be trying to beat the maenad at her own game. In his third move, he scrunched his whole face up, hard. If ugly could repel madness, he'd win, Sookie thought.

Sookie knew she shouldn't be watching, but she was as fascinated by the situation as Sheldon appeared to be. What the heck did the man think he was playing at? She supposed that if he didn't believe in maenads, he wouldn't believe there was anything to fear.

Sheldon maintained his position and Sookie hoped the wind didn't change. Then, Sookie realised that Sheldon was in luck, there was no wind. The air was as still as death.

Leonard said, "Sheldon-"

Sheldon cut him off. "Just a moment! I have to blow up this maenad's head with my mind."

"You know that's not going to work, right? Stop acting crazy."

"I'm not crazy. My mother had me tested. You know that," Sheldon said, crossly. "You're putting me off my game."

"I'm not so sure this is a game," said Leonard.

"Don't worry! I know what I'm doing here."

"I'm glad someone does," said a woman, Sookie thought was Bernadette. "Fyi, no snark intended."

In a fourth move, Sookie watched Sheldon add an extra finger at each temple. He dug his fingers into the sensitive skin there, pressing even harder against the bone, until his knuckles were white. He leaned further into his hunch to close the gap on Callisto. The two were eye to eye, when he began his fifth move. His whole face vibrated before Callisto's in some sort of super effort, as if he thought sparks would fly if he kept right on squint-staring into those hot maenad eyes. And then repeat!

Yup, Sookie thought, this Sheldon might have been tested for craziness, but they should have got a second opinion.

Sookie had hardly finished that thought when the maenad shrieked a shriek that bent the air waves and her ear drums, and then without further ado, Callisto's head exploded with a big bang, followed by a dust storm. Sookie got her eyes closed in time, mostly. It wasn't a splatter zone they were in, more like dust bowl.

Dead silence followed the big bang.

Somehow Sookie's mind couldn't grasp what had just happened. It wanted to equate it to something like a meteor strike - the incoming shriek, the big bang of impact and the dust thrown up all over. Even the earth under Sookie's feet had trembled, as if an impact event had occurred. Their supe-sandwich had staggered, before regaining its footing. But it hadn't been a meteor. A maenad's head had blown up!

Sookie carefully opened her eyes. And there was the maenad. Almost!

With thyrsus still in hand, the body of Callisto stood, headless, like a broken statue. What remained of her head hung all around them in a mist of twinkling motes under the fairy lights. It was pretty, and pretty gruesome at the same time.

"Oh my Lord," Sheldon said, "that was a fine how do you do!"

And with that, the maenad's corpse turned to dust. Callisto disintegrated in trickling cascades of dirt, first from the shoulders and then all the way down to her little dirty toes. Even her fawn skins and thyrsus dusted. Through the green, green grass, Callisto streamed grittily, returning to the Earth. From the woods, a warm, fragrant breeze swept in, blowing the remaining dust motes to the four corners of the Earth.

Sheldon moaned, "I hope I didn't breathe in any of that old maenad dust. I have allergies." The man looked perfectly healthy and relaxed, for someone who had just killed his first maenad.

For a moment, Sookie's head felt as light as the air around her, now that the maenad's influence had passed. Or maybe it was because Bill was squeezing her too tight! Some things never changed!

"Bill, Karin, go get some clothes on. These folks don't need any more trauma!"

With that, their sandwich split. At the same time, the visitors 'exploded' out of the car to hug their man. They seemed to realise that a terrible threat had just been defeated. By the look on Sheldon's face, he'd rather have battled another maenad, than get cuddles. He said, "Just because the people over there were having a group hug, doesn't mean we have to!"

His friends gave him some space, but the driver, Leonard, couldn't help patting Sheldon on the back, saying, "You do have some mad skills alright!"

"Who knew?" Sheldon replied, laughing. "Well, me, naturally! I always knew I had a super-hero tucked away inside me, just waiting for the opportunity to get out! I'm not just a genius. I am a maenad terminator!"

"How did you know what to do? When did you realise she was a real maenad?" Bernadette asked, sounding impressed.

"I didn't know, and then it all just came to me."

Penny said, "That was a real maenad then?"

At this point, Sookie and Sam piped up in unison, "Oh, yes!"

"Awesome," Penny replied.

A dark-haired woman wearing glasses planted a quick kiss on Sheldon's smooth cheek. "My hero!" she explained. "But damn! I'd really have loved to dissect that maenad's brain!"

Sookie and Sam were startled. They hadn't seen that comment coming.

Leonard explained, with a happy shrug. "She's a neurobiologist. What do you expect?"

Everyone laughed and the tension of the evening finally bled away. The bugs chirruped again.

In the warmth of that summer night, Sookie suddenly realised that being different was quite normal.

"I'll have that gold star now, Bernadette. I did my own dirty work, right?" Sheldon said.

He had to have the last word.

"Bazinga!"

The End

Disclaimer: All characters from the SVM universe are owned and created by Charlaine Harris. She is not responsible for the actions of her characters in this story. Thank you too, to the creators of the wonderful Big Bang characters.