Chapter 9

Obi-Wan sat on a bench in one of the ships next to Padawan Lanus, staring at the cold body of Xanatos as the adults discussed the next course of action. It was over. He couldn't believe it was finally over. He no longer had to fear Xanatos coming back, but why did he feel so…he didn't know…sad, maybe? Or numb?...with the death of Xanatos? Was it because of what he meant to Master Jinn?

He tore his eyes away from the body and glanced at Master Jinn. He hadn't said much since he returned with Master Windu and a dead Xanatos. He seemed to be in his own little world. He stood slightly away from the other adults, leaning against the interior of the ship near Xanatos body. He stared at the cold body with expressionless eyes. He didn't even try to look like he was paying attention to the conversation. It was already decided that he would accompany the body to Talos, Xanatos home planet. Master Runda decided to return to Coruscant with her padawan. They were discussing whether Master Windu or Master Tahl would travel with Master Jinn.

Obi-Wan still didn't know what was going to happen to him. The way the Masters spoke made it seem like he was going back to the Temple with them, but why? What for? He hadn't been chosen as a padawan. Though, he was glad he wasn't staying there on Bandomeer. Maybe, he was going back to the Temple temporarily, until they found another place to send him.

Master Jinn suddenly looked over and caught his eye. Embarrassed to be caught staring, Obi-Wan quickly looked down. He could still feel the Master's eyes on him. He sensed him walking around the other three adult Jedi and make his way over to him. Obi-Wan glanced up from under his eye lashes as the Jedi Master approached him.

"Padawan Lanus." He heard Master Jinn address the girl next to him.

"Master Jinn?" she asked.

"I need to speak with Obi-Wan alone, if you don't mind." Obi-Wan snapped his eyes up and stared at the Master.

"Of course, Master Jinn. I'll just go…stand by my Master then." Padawan Lanus stood up and made her way to her Master.

Master Jinn knelt down before him. "Obi-Wan…"

"Yes, Master Jinn?"

Master Jinn looked over his shoulders and stared at the body of Xanatos before looking back at him. Obi-Wan tilted his head slightly, wondering what sort of inner conflict the older man was dealing with. "Obi-Wan, just before I left, you came to me and asked if I was willing to be your Master." Obi-Wan looked down and shifted in his seat. He nodded and glanced back up. "I told you that I will return with an answer. But with everything that happened, I never did have the chance to give you my answer." Obi-Wan felt his heart pounding in his chest with anticipation. He looked back up again him, his eyes filled with hope. "I am still not going to give you an answer." His heart sank to his feet. "After everything you learned and experienced these past few months, I feel like I have to ask you, if you are still willing." He could feel his heart coming back up to his chest. "Obi-Wan, will you do me the honor of becoming my padawan?"

Obi-Wan couldn't stop the smile from coming to his face, no matter how hard he tried. "Really, Master? You'll take me as your padawan?"

Master Jinn's lips twitched into a small smile and he nodded. "Yes, Obi-Wan." He looked over his shoulders again.

Obi-Wan followed his gaze to Xanatos. He sighed. "I will not turn, Master," he promised. "I am not like him. I won't turn. I won't do that to you."

Master Jinn turned back to him and nodded. "I know, Obi-Wan." He patted his knee. "I know." He stood up. "I'll see you when I return from Talos, Obi-Wan. We will get everything settled then."

"Yes, Master."

Master Jinn walked over to the other Master's and interrupted them. "Mace, I need you to go back to Coruscant. I've accepted Obi-Wan as my padawan and I need someone who would be able to stop the other Council Members from sending him off again while I'm getting Xanatos' body to Talos."

Master Windu nodded. "Alright, Qui-Gon. We'll take Master Runda's ship. Be careful you two," he said to Master Jinn and Tahl.

With the knowledge that Qui-Gon Jinn was taking him as his padawan, the Council allowed Obi-Wan to move into his living quarters while he was gone. He wouldn't get his braid until Qui-Gon came back, but he wouldn't want the braid without him there anyways. Master Windu and Yoda both kept an eye on him while Qui-Gon was away, making sure he didn't get into trouble and had enough to eat. They even put him right back in classes. His friends were so surprised, but glad to see him. He spent all his free time with them.

Late one night almost two weeks after returning to the Temple, Obi-Wan woke when a hand touched his brow and lightly brushed aside his short bangs. Not wanting to wake up, he groaned and rolled away. He could feel someone sitting next to him, but his sleep filled mind didn't care to find out who it was. A hand touched his shoulders and gave him a comforting squeeze. He felt the sleeping couch shift as the person stood up and walked away.

"How is he?" a quiet feminine voice whispered from somewhere near the door.

"Asleep," a familiar baritone voice answered.

He heard the door swish closed and his eyes popped opened in excitement, suddenly feeling wide awake. Master Qui-Gon. That was his new Master! He sat up and flung the covers back. Qui-Gon was back! He was so excited that he was back. Obi-Wan jumped out of his sleep couch and rushed to the door. He could hear the mummer of voices speaking quietly on the other side. He paused. The conversation sounded serious. He was unsure if he should interrupt them. To gauge the seriousness of the conversation, Obi-Wan messed with the control panel of the door and opened it just a crack, just loud enough to hear.

"…does not remember, but it's for the best. I don't know how to react if he did remember…" Master Qui-Gon was saying.

Realizing it truly was a private and very serious conversation, Obi-Wan reached for the panels to close the doors. He would just have to greet Qui-Gon in the morning.

"…Obi-Wan was in a lot of pain." He paused when he heard his name. "I don't think it's much of a surprise he doesn't remember," the voice he recognized as Master Tahl said. He dropped his hand and turned back to the conversation, wondering what they could be talking about.

Qui-Gon tiredly made tea as Tahl sat at the table. "Which brings me to the question I was wondering for a while now. Are you ever going to tell him, Qui-Gon?"

He paused and turned around to face her. "No," he said before placing the kettle on the stove. He leaned against the stove. "I can't tell Obi-Wan, Tahl." He faced her again. "You saw my reaction when we found out Xanatos had him. I was unable to think rationally or even meditate. Just knowing about him put everything else out of my mind but his safety and his happiness. I was ready to do anything to get him back safely. It's a connection and an attachment that cannot be. My mind was on him the whole time. I was worried and fearful for his life. Every time the idea of Xanatos killing Obi-Wan came to me, I was filled with deep fear, pain, and thoughts of revenge. I didn't think I could be rational at all if Obi-Wan had died. Having such knowledge is too dangerous. The truth must be kept from him. I cannot be his father. I will be his mentor and teacher only. I don't know what the consequences will be if the truth came out and I'm not going to risk it." He took out two mugs for the both of them and the darkest tea he owned. "Look what Obi-Wan went through because Xanatos found out. Enemies will constantly use Obi-Wan to hurt me if they knew of our relationship."

"Qui-Gon, how will you keep something this big from him?"

Qui-Gon poured the water into the mugs and brought them to the table. He sat down across from Tahl and sighed. "I don't know. I'll have to keep the truth hidden deep within my mind. We will not speak of it again after this night. It will be too risky." He took a sip of his hot tea and smiled woefully. He looked up at Tahl with wonder. "How dangerous the knowledge can be, it is also the most wonderful feeling to have. Finding out I had a son was…unexpected to say the least. When Lady Ser'Fay confirmed my suspicion of Obi-Wan's parentage, I didn't know what to do or what to think. Not only did I find out I had a son, but I had an opportunity to raise and train him…" He shook his head in amazement. "He will be with me. I would able to watch him grow and learn new things. I can make sure he is safe and happy, that he is taken care of. It's remarkable."

Tahl smiled at him. "I am happy for you, Qui-Gon. I really am. You do deserve this chance."

He sighed heavily and took another sip. "A chance that has to remain a secret. But, it does feel good to know my son, to be responsible for him." He shook his head. "I can't let this knowledge affect his training. You have to make sure I let him come with me on those dangerous missions." His eyes were bright, half joking and half not.

Tahl nodded. "Yes, that would be hard, I suppose, but it's something you are going to have to do, Qui-Gon, if you don't want the truth to be known. You can't smother him. You have to learn to let him experience the world, the good and the bad. It will be hard, but I know you can do it, Qui-Gon." Her eyes twinkled with merriment. "You have such a handsome son too. How will you ever keep the girls away from him?"

Qui-Gon grinned and leaned back in his chair. "I have the Force on my side and I can be very intimidating." Tahl laughed and rolled her eyes. Qui-Gon's grinned slipped away and he nodded. "But I do agree with you. He is a nice looking young boy. He gets that from his mother. He looks a lot like her and looks nothing like me. It's a good thing though. It would be hard to explain why he looked like me. The will of the Force, I'm sure. His parentage is meant to be kept a secret for now."

Tahl shook her head. "I wouldn't say nothing like you, Qui-Gon. He has your eyes."

He shook his head. "I don't have multi-color eyes like Obi-Wan."

Tahl chuckled. "The shapes of your eyes are the same and when Obi-Wan eyes are blue, they look exactly like yours. It is amazing just how much his eyes can look like yours. But I wasn't just talking about shapes and colors. They have the same determined look at times. You get a certain look when you are being stubborn about something and Obi-Wan has that same look. I noticed that on the ship when we were waiting for you. He would not sit still. He was worried for you. He really reminded me of you and the way you would act if someone you cared for was fighting a dangerous enemy by themselves. And I am sure he will pick up more from you as the years pass."

Qui-Gon chuckled. "Yes and I'm sure the Jedi Council would not be impressed if Obi-Wan picks up my more…rebellious nature." There was a moment of silence as they both went deep into their own thoughts. "Obi-Wan has a destiny." He looked up and caught Tahl's eye. "And I am fearful of what that destiny is. Obi-Wan is such a pure boy. He fits his name."

"What does his name mean?" Tahl asked curiously.

"The light and pure one," he answered. "And he is, but I have a feeling his future is not as light and pure as he is. His faith and morals will be tested constantly."

Tahl reached over and touched his hand. "Don't think about it, Qui-Gon. Aren't you always saying keep your mind in the here and now?"

Qui-Gon grinned. "Yes, I suppose I should. It helps having someone to remind me of my own philosophy. I must focus on the here and now, must prepare him for whatever future he may have. He will not walk into anything unprepared, not on my watch." Tahl leaned back and grinned. Qui-Gon eyed her. "What is it, Tahl?"

She made a 'hmm' sound at the back of her throat. She hid her smile behind her mug as she took a drink of her tea. Her smile grew when Qui-Gon gave her a frustrated look. "You really do love him, don't you?" she said it in a form of a question, but she already knew the answer.

Qui-Gon paused as he thought his next few words. "From the moment Lady Ser'Fay told me of him, I did feel this instantaneous affection for the boy."

Tahl gave him a look. "I'm not just talking about affection. You love him. Come on, Qui-Gon, you can say it." She teased with a smile.

Qui-Gon looked down at his empty mug and nodded his head. "Yes. Yes, I do. You happy now?"

Tahl shook her head. "Say it. You need to admit it out loud to yourself, Qui-Gon. You what?"

Qui-Gon shifted in his seat uncomfortably. "Yes. I love him. He's my son. Of course, I love him. Obi-Wan Kenobi is my son and I love him." He sat there quietly. It did feel good to admit it, just like Tahl knew it would. His lips twitched up into a sorrowful smile. "He will never know the depths of my affection for him." He looked up at the chrono on the wall. "It's getting late."

Tahl looked up at it as well and nodded. "Agree." They stood up and washed out their mugs. "Are you officially taking Obi-Wan as your padawan tomorrow?" she asked.

Qui-Gon nodded as he led her to the front door. "Yes. After I get him checked out by the healers, we are going to see the Council and make it official."

Tahl paused at the door and turned to him. "Speaking of healers, Qui-Gon. Dash wants his datapad back."

Qui-Gon nodded. "Right. I'll return it tomorrow when I'm there."

"You're seeing him tomorrow for the check up?" she asked.

Qui-Gon shook his head. "No, Obi-Wan will be seeing Healer Giller, but I'll be in the area."

Tahl nodded and smiled up at him. "I'm happy for you, Qui-Gon. I really am. Obi-Wan will be good for you. Goodnight."

Qui-Gon said his goodbyes and Tahl left. He shut off the lights and went to bed himself. Neither one of them had noticed the pair of wide, bright eyes peering at them, picking up every word they had said.

The next morning, Obi-Wan stepped out of his sleeping quarters and immediately froze, his eyes going wide. Qui-Gon was already up and fixing breakfast in the small kitchen right across the room. Obi-Wan could only watch the man as he mixed ingredients together and drank from his tea cup, moving expertly around the kitchen. His father. His flesh and blood father. The man who helped gave him life. Obi-Wan drank in the sight of his tall figure moving about in the kitchen, unaware of Obi-Wan's new found knowledge. Should he tell him that he overheard him and Master Tahl?

He thought back to what Qui-Gon had said last night. "I don't know what the consequences will be if the truth came out and I'm not going to risk it." He also spoke of how dangerous the knowledge could be. "Look what Obi-Wan went through because Xanatos found out. Enemies will constantly use Obi-Wan to hurt me if they knew of our relationship." Obi-Wan could understand the value of his words. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he made his decision. He would do what Qui-Gon did. He would bury the knowledge deep within his mind. He would put it under lock and key, hidden from sight. He would put layers of shields around it, keeping it from those who might try and invade his mind. He wanted the knowledge to be kept safe, guarded, and protected. The more he grew and learned the more protected the information would be.

He watched Qui-Gon reached for some plates and set them down on the counter before turning back to the cooking food. Obi-Wan would not tell him that he knew. He would not tell anyone, not even his friends. He would protect his father, just like his father was protecting him. His father. He could barely believe it. He understood what Qui-Gon meant last night. Just knowing changed things. It was filled with expectations and it put Qui-Gon in a different light. Obi-Wan wanted to know everything about him. He never wanted to disappoint him and he would forever be loyal to him. He would stand by him and not waver. "Obi-Wan Kenobi is my son and I love him." That praise filled him such warmth. How would he ever betray him with that treasured praise running through his mind?

Obi-Wan studied Qui-Gon's movements and his heart pounded rapidly when he realized what the warm feeling inside him was. He held back a smile. Qui-Gon Jinn was his father and he loved him.

Qui-Gon finally noticed him still standing to the entrance of his sleeping quarters. He gave him a slight smile of amusement. His father's smile of amusement. Obi-Wan noted with his heart beating wildly in his chest. "Are you going to stand there all day, Obi-Wan?" He waved his spatula over to the plates still sitting on the counter. "Why don't you set the table for breakfast? It's almost ready."

Obi-Wan stored the information he learned last night away to the back of his mind. He would place shields around it when he had some free time. He walked over. "Master, when did you get back?" he asked, trying to act like he didn't know. Master. That was what Qui-Gon would ever be. He couldn't call him 'father'. He picked up the plates delicately and made his way over to the table. He wanted to do this simple task right. He wanted to please him and never disappoint him, even in the small tasks.

"Last night. You were already sleeping. I did not wish to wake you," Qui-Gon answered with his back turned to him as he continued to finish breakfast.

Obi-Wan set the plates down at the table and stared in thought. Where to place them? The table was a small round table with five possible seats. Obi-Wan eyed the back of Qui-Gon, wondering if he had a usual spot. He didn't want to mess this up. He bit his lower lip and decided to place a plate where Qui-Gon had sat last night. He then placed his plate right across from him, where Tahl had sat. He walked over to the cupboards and took out a cup for himself. "What are we going to do today, Master?" he asked, trying to keep a conversation going.

"We are going down to the healers for a quick check up..." Obi-Wan held back a groan. "…and then see the Council. We are going to make our union official. There is regular milk, kuul milk, and muja juice in the cooler. Pick any that you want. If you choose kuul milk…" He used his spatula to point at the kettle. "…you can use that to heat it."

Obi-Wan went over to the cooler. "Which beverage do you want, Master?"

Qui-Gon glanced up and shook his head. "Don't concern yourself with me, Obi-Wan. I'm just going to have my tea." He nodded his head towards his mug on the counter.

Obi-Wan raised a brow. Tea? Did he drink anything else? Obi-Wan didn't dare ask. Not this early in their relationship. He decided to go with muja juice.

Breakfast went by with mundane conversation about what Obi-Wan did the past two weeks and how he was doing in his classes. After breakfast was done, Qui-Gon led a reluctant Obi-Wan to the Halls of Healing. Obi-Wan wanted to protest and beg not to go, but he didn't want Qui-Gon to change his mind about taking him as his padawan. He didn't want his father to think he was a pathetic youngling, but he couldn't keep his face in a neutral expression. He was sure his reluctance was shown all over his face. He had yet to master the inexpressive mask most Jedi Masters knew.

Qui-Gon folded his arms as he waited by Obi-Wan's bedside for Healer Giller to come in. He watched as Obi-Wan shifted uncomfortably on the sleeping couch and was struck with remembrance of the day he got the assignment to research Obi-Wan as a possible padawan. Dash had told him of Obi-Wan's dislike for the infirmary. From the way Dash had explained it, he expected Obi-Wan to put up more of a fight. Although he didn't fight it, Obi-Wan sure didn't look like he wanted to be there. His eyes kept flickering to the door, to the window, and down at the ground, as if he was planning an escape. He would start to swing his feet only to stop himself after a minute or so, only to pick up again and stop again. He shifted his butt around on the sleeping couch like he was looking for a comfortable spot and was never satisfied. He had a constant frown on his face. It took everything in Qui-Gon's power to keep the amused smile from his face.

Finally, Healer Giller walked in, but Obi-Wan only seemed to tense up more at the healers presence. The Togruta healer, however, only gave him a smile, his green eyes sparkling in amusement. "Obi-Wan. I heard you came in on your own two feet, no pushing or shoving necessary. I was wondering if there was a case of mistaken identity," the healer teased. Obi-Wan sneaked a glance at Qui-Gon and Healer Giller seemed to take that as an answer to why he was being corroborative. Healer Giller laughed as his eyes flickered to him as well. "I see. Your protector is here with you. Yes, that would sure change things, wouldn't it?"

Qui-Gon tilted his head in confusion. "Protector, Healer Giller?" he questioned. His sharp eyes caught the redden cheeks on Obi-Wan's face before he bent his head down in embarrassment.

Healer Giller put down a datapad. "Take your shirt off, Obi-Wan. I want to see how your back is doing." He ordered before turning to him. "Surely you must remember, Master Jinn. Obi-Wan, here, was the boy you had to get out of the ventilation. He must have been only…what three?"

"Four," Obi-Wan meekly corrected as he placed his tunic on the sleeping couch next to him. He still refused to lift up his eyes towards Qui-Gon.

Healer Giller nodded. "Right. You had to talk him out of the vents. He was scared of all the healers back then. You two had to make some sort of deal, if I remember correctly, to get him out. Turn around, Obi-Wan. Let me see your back." Obi-Wan sighed, but did what he was told.

Qui-Gon nodded when the memory came to him. "Yes, I remember now." He eyed his son, picturing him as the youngling he had to converse out of the narrow space of the vent. He blinked. He hadn't thought much about that little boy after that day, but he had liked him. To think, it was his son. He held his little boy on his lap for a few minutes and didn't even realize it. He was such a small child then. He was sweet and made him smile and laugh with ease. He did feel a connection with him. It was one of the reasons he never sought him out afterwards and put him from his mind. He did not want to feel any connections to a youngling, not when he was so determined never to have another padawan again. He shook his head in amusement. He had told that child he would not be his Master, but, here he was, about to enter the Council Chambers to take him as his padawan.

"Will you be alright for a moment? I have a quick errand to run," Qui-Gon said, remembering the datapad in his pocket he still needed to return.

Obi-Wan finally looked up at him, his cheeks still a little red, and nodded. "Yes, sir."

Healer Giller nodded as he studied Obi-Wan's back. "We'll be just fine, Qui-Gon."

Qui-Gon left the room and headed down the corridor to Dash's area of the Halls of Healing. He knocked on the door and entered when Dash gave him permission. The Epicanthix Healer was just finishing with a patient, a youngling. The youngling's Crèche Master stepped forward and picked up the teary-eyed Quarren boy. The boy held tightly on the Master as they left the room.

"What can I do for you, Qui-Gon?" Dash asked.

Qui-Gon pulled out the datapad. "Just came to return this, Dash." He handed it over to him.

Dash took the datapad and set it down to the side. "Was it helpful to you in anyway?"

Qui-Gon tilted his head in acknowledgment. "It had its usage," he answered vaguely.

"Elusive as always." Dash said with a smile. Then he frowned. "How are you holding up, Qui-Gon? I heard what happened with Xanatos," he said delicately in concern.

Qui-Gon gave him a look. "I'm fine," he said firmly, putting the end to that conversation. He had no wish to speak of it, to anyone. How would he be able to explain the guilt? Xanato's dark chuckle ringing through his ears every time he closed his eyes? The flashed image of his trusted lightsaber inside his stomach when he glanced at Obi-Wan? His twisted nightmares of stabbing Obi-Wan in the same fashion?

Dash sighed and nodded. He quickly changed the subject. "I heard a rumor you were getting a padawan today."

Qui-Gon gave him a faint smile, fully aware Dash knew all about Obi-Wan by now and that he was just digging for information. "I must go, Dash," he said stepping out of the room.

"You're going to elude the topic? I see how it is! Don't tell the one healer who actually likes you!" Dash shouted out at him. Qui-Gon continued walking, smiling at the faint sound of Dash chuckling after him.

A few hours later a giddy Obi-Wan was sitting back on the couch in Qui-Gon's…their living quarters. Qui-Gon sat next to him, weaving the braid on the side of his head. Obi-Wan could feel the Force flowing through Qui-Gon, coercing his hair to grow for the braid. He was a padawan! Not just any padawan, he was officially Qui-Gon Jinn's padawan. His dreams were finally coming true. He tried to keep the smile off his face, but he was sure he didn't succeed. He watched from the corner of his eye as Qui-Gon tied the end of the braid.

"There you go, Padawan."

Obi-Wan could almost feel his eyes lit up at the title. He touched his braid. It was rather plain right now, a simple braid with one red bead and a lock of his Master's hair interwoven into it. His Master's darker hair was rather noticeable right then, but he knew once the other beads were added it would be harder to tell. "Thank you, Master," he said as he fingered the braid almost reverently.

He felt his Master touch his shoulder and he looked up at his…father's blue eyes. "I realize I missed your Naming Day, Obi-Wan, but I do have something for you." Qui-Gon reached into his pocket and pulled something out. His fist was around it, making it hard for Obi-Wan to see what it was. "I got this from a river on my home world when I was no older then you are now. It came from the River of Light. Hold out your hand."

Curious, Obi-Wan held out his hand. Qui-Gon placed something smooth into his hand. Obi-Wan tilted his head in confusion. "A rock, Master?" he questioned as he fingered the black stone. It was warm and smooth. There was a slight vibe that felt comforting. Obi-Wan smiled as he turned it in his hands. The rays coming from the sun through the balcony doors hit the rock and Obi-Wan could see red lines on the rock.

"It's a river stone," Qui-Gon said, watching him as he studied the stone. He leaned back against the couch.

Obi-Wan looked up. It wasn't the best gift one could receive and he was a bit confused why his Master was giving it to him, but, despite what the object was, it was a gift from his father and that, in itself, made it special. It was a beautiful stone and it came from his father's home world, a culture that ran through Obi-Wan's blood. "Thank you, Master Qui-Gon." He held the stone tightly in his fist, feeling the warmth of the vibe. He leaned back against Qui-Gon's side, feeling the body heat from the older man.

An arm wrapped around his shoulders and Obi-Wan smiled. "You're welcome, Obi-Wan," the Jedi Master said from above him.

Father and son sat there, feeling content in each other's company.