A Bed Full of Memories

Summary: Letting go is never easy. Taichi thought he had moved on from his first love, Yamato. However, all memories come attached with feelings, and they can't lay dormant forever.

D-Angel:I tried not to make you wait too long for this chapter, especially after the cliffhanger and all. To make up for the teasing, this one's quite a long one, basically 3,700 words. It should be necessary... Erm, not sure what else to say about it really, I guess I'm slightly fearful it's a bit 'meh'? Ah well, read on and relish the overload of angst I suppose!

Much love to the fans btw! :)

Rating: M

Warnings: Angst (lots of it), strong language, nudity!

Chapter 10

"You're what?"

"I'm outside."

Outside… How had Yamato ended up there? He was meant to be in Itami, with his Father.

"Why?" I continued to question. Using my trusty toilet seat, I managed to stand up. My headache hit me full on, almost causing me to fall back down. I never understood why, when hungover, the bathroom lights seemed even more powerful from an upright position…

"Err, don't you remember phoning me about eight times last night?" There was just as much bemusement in his voice then there had been in mine after I had initially answered his call.

"Oh fuck," I groaned, flashes of repressed memories started to trickle back into my mind, one feeble drop at a time. I had drunk dialled Yamato. "Shit, no, fuck off. You can't be here, not now."

"I don't care, just let me in,"

No, I couldn't handle him, not right now. I hung up and accidentally dropped my phone onto the floor (fortunately it didn't break). What the hell had happened last night? I was desperate to know as -after I had used the toilet- I stumbled towards the sink, ignoring my reflection in the mirror above it, and started to fill it up with cold water.

Only small snippets of crying down the phone to Yamato flashed through my head, the rest of the memories were so blurred I knew that I'd have to sober up before I could make sense of them.

Once the sink was full, I took a deep breath and dunked my head into the water. It was icy cold compared to my burning hot skin and it quickly soothed my throbbing headache. There was something serene about being underwater; all interference from the rest of the world seemed to ease away, as if I was trapped in my own little private bubble of tranquillity. If it wasn't for the whole lack of oxygen thing, I would have loved to stay there forever.

When my lungs finally started to burn, warning me that I needed an intake of air, a hand firmly gripped my arm and my body jerked forwards. I abruptly lifted my head from the water before the person had a chance to pull me up themselves. As I tugged my arm away from my intruder, I was unable to mask my shock when I saw Yamato's piercing eyes staring back at me.

"Fuck! How did you get in?" My voice was unnecessarily loud and fretful. I was now shaking violently with my arms folded tightly against my chest. He was wearing the glasses we used for driving and his eyes looked tired.

"Spare key in the plant pot," Yamato said, seemingly surprised that I hadn't guessed beforehand.

"Get out," I growled, firmly pushing my hand against his shoulder, forcing Yamato away from me. At the same time, thanks to my still partly drunken state, I lost my balance and fell towards him, straight into his waiting arms.

"I'm not leaving whilst you're in this state," Yamato affirmed, hugging me so tightly I could only just about breathe.

"I'm fine," I hissed, although I lacked the strength to shove him away from me again.

"Baka, I saw the vodka in the living room."

My face burnt in shame. No doubt he could smell the vomit on me, and the traces of alcohol still lingering on my breath. It was probably wrong of me, but I had just wanted to drink, to temporarily erase the burning pain tearing through my chest, as well as the regretful thoughts that wouldn't stop pounding against my skull.

Several moments later, Yamato instructed me to sit down before he disappeared out the room. I massaged my fingers against my aching temples and bit down on my lower lip until he returned. Kneeling down beside me, he pressed two rounded white tablets into the palm of my hand.

Vaguely analysing them I knew they were only painkillers, but at that stage I wouldn't have cared if they were ecstasy. I hastily gulped them down with the glass of water Yamato handed to me before I placed the empty glass down and rolled onto my side, pulling my legs up against my chest.

As Yamato crouched down over the bathtub and turned on the taps, I stayed curled up on the floor pathetically, listening to the therapeutic gushing sound of the water filling up the bath. I didn't even care when he forced me to my feet, proceeding to strip me out of my vomit covered clothing and guided me towards the bath.

Momentarily, I was at ease as Yamato helped me sink down into the lukewarm bubbly bath water. The painkillers had already started to kick in; the pain from my throbbing temples was beginning to subside. My eyes were about to close, until Yamato started to tug off his clothes. As soon as he was naked, he stepped into the tub and slid down beside me.

The water sloshed up against the sides as he reached out and embraced me with his arms. The trembling in my muscles gradually eased, and the feeling of resentment was replaced by a shameful sensation of relaxation as I melted against his soft body.

We spent the next half an hour in a surreal silence. I'd broken Daisuke's heart, and now I was toying with the catalyst that had triggered my betrayal. Whilst Yamato's fingers traced against my backbone, I cringed as I recalled screeching to Yamato down the phone last night, blaming him for everything. I was now grateful he spared me the pain of having talk about Daisuke and what I planned to do because I had no idea myself.

I woke up to Yamato's lips grazing against my forehead as the cool water around us slowly drained away. As I tilted my head to the side I realised that my headache was almost gone; however, the stabbing guilt and nausea in the pit of my stomach was still there.

Once we were out the bath, Yamato grabbed a towel from the radiator and proceeded to dry me from head to toe. I usually disliked being fussed over, especially in such a childlike fashion, but with Yamato it reminded me so much of the old days, for all the right reasons.

As he dried himself, I tied my own towel tightly around my waist, praying I wouldn't end up having a 'Yamato towel malfunction' as I headed for the sink.

"Where's your mum?" Yamato asked.

"At her man's place, where else?" I spoke honestly, knowing he could empathise with my parent related predicament. He half-smiled and nodded in acknowledgment before he started tugging on his clothes.

Once he was fully dressed, Yamato left the room whilst I brushed my teeth, desperate to get rid of the lingering taste of my stomach acids. I think he may have mentioned something about food, but for once I lacked an appetite.

As I edged away from the sink, my foot nudged against my phone. I uneasily stared down at the object like it was some kind of venomous spider. No doubt word would have spread about me and Yamato by now. I gradually bent down, fearing my towel would slip (although no one was around to see anything), and scooped my lifeline off from the floor.

As I checked my phone, what surprised me was the lack of missed calls, or angry texts. It had been way over twelve hours now after Daisuke had found out; had he really not told anyone yet? He wasn't exactly knowing for keeping his emotions and thoughts locked away from others, unless…

I started to flick through my outgoing calls history.

"Shit."

I had phoned Daisuke numerous times last night, between making several calls to Yamato. Daisuke had only answered one of those calls and we had spoken for five minutes. I groaned and slapped a hand against the side of my face, willing myself to remember the conversation. I dreaded the state I must have been in, but not as much as not knowing the things I had said.

Glancing at my phone again, I noticed that Yamato had answered every single one of my calls, apart from the last three I had made- obviously when he must have been driving to Odaiba, solely to see me.

"Why did you come?" I asked this question as I stepped into the kitchen, surprised to see Yamato was clearing up a mess I wasn't aware existed. A few chunks of potato were scattered across the floor, alongside most of the other bits of food I had planned to prepare. Typically, Yamato ignored me as he swept up the soiled remains into my Mum's dark green dustpan and brush.

"Yama, why did you..."

"...I'd never heard you sound so distraught before," Yamato looked up and abruptly interrupted me in a deep lyrical voice; even the usual calm blue flames of his eyes were flickering wildly with emotion, "I was worried you'd do something stupid."

Narrowing my eyes as Yamato turned his focus back to the floor and continued to clean up the food off from it.

"What did I say to you? On the phone I mean," I couldn't help but continue to press, eager for some answers, or any clues which would jerk my memory. Obviously I had said something that had concerned him enough to drive all the way down here and check up on me in the early hours of the morning.

"You said a lot of things, mostly incoherent." Yamato spoke without even glancing up at me.

I grit my teeth together out of frustration- if only I could have remembered everything I'd said. Yamato wasn't exactly helping with his dodging around the subject bullshit.

"Eugh, Just tell me, it's killing me! I have to know," my voice cracked as I reached the end of my sentence. I was practically ready to squeeze the truth out of him if I had to. My face was burning with anger and my body was shaking so violently I was convinced I was about to explode.

What irritated the most was the expression on his face- so calm and collective. The only trace of emotion lingered in his eyes.

"Seeing you like this is killing me..." Yamato paused, then his mouth made small movements but no sound came out, like a ventriloquist act gone wrong. Carefully he stood up, balancing the brush on the fully loaded dustpan. "Chi, it's probably best you try and remember for yourself what was said last night."

The last part he said definitely wasn't something I wanted to hear.

I swallowed a painful lump back into the depths of my throat. Hurrying towards Yamato, I aggressively slapped the dustpan and brush out of his hand, placed my arm round the back of his neck and pressed my lips against his. I didn't intend to kiss him at all. I had planned on punching him, so I guess my actions shocked myself as much as they shocked him.

It took Yamato a good few seconds for him to react, but by stomach swirled in delight when he started to kiss me back, hungrily; his hands caressing my back, gradually falling lower and lower. Damn it. He'd been patiently waiting for me to make the first move, knowing all to well how flimsy the line between rage and passion was for me.

As we pulled apart- after what seemed like several minutes later- I noticed the wicked glint in Yamato's eyes. He undid my towel in one swift second, using his thumb and index finger. I breathed out in exhilaration when it hit the floor. Why the fuck was I giving him an excuse to do this? He was the reason why Daisuke would struggle to trust me ever again...

Somehow we ended up in the bedroom, as opposed to just screwing in the kitchen or on the living room sofa. I never thought I'd ever have sex with Yamato in that dinky bed again, but moments later it was very much real and happening. To be honest, it was over in a matter of minutes due to the thrill of pretending we were teenagers again.

As I reached across to my bedside table for my cigarettes, I felt no need to wallow in the guilt; by then I was used to doing things I would later regret.

"I didn't come here to sleep with you, in case that's what you're thinking." Yamato didn't even bother covering his body with the covers, which I believed was a deliberate attempt of his to turn me on once again. Damn his nipple piercing and lack of hair down there...

"I couldn't care less if that was or wasn't your intention," I coldly mumbled, holding my cigarette up to my lips, "it's hardly going to change anything that's happened."

Oh how I wished it would, but things were just too complicated.

"You should probably talk things out with Daisuke," Yamato advised, the lack of compassion in his voice causing me to sneer almost out of reflex.

"And what? Tell him that I've fucked you again?"

Another uneasy silence, great. I'd asked for it though. I peeped over at him and noticed that his lustful eyes were fixed on my fag; he obviously wanted a smoke, but I wasn't going to give him one.

"Taichi!" An angry female voice bellowed from the near distance. I instantly recognised Sora's mother-like tone and almost choked on the mouthful of smoke I'd just inhaled. As Sora banged loudly on the front door, I quickly jumped out of my bed, almost tripping over the covers which had twisted around my legs.

"Shit! Stay here," I instructed Yamato, handing him my cigarette before I hurriedly pulled my drawers and cupboard open and wiggled into whatever suitable clothes I could grab. I saw him take a couple of desperate drags from that cigarette before I stumbled out my room.

Finally, the fearful act was happening, where I, the cheat, would get ridiculed by the mutual friends Daisuke and I somehow shared. Of course it would start with Sora; she was almost everyone's first port of call when things got problematic.

Deciding that it'd be best to get the worst part over and done with, I flung open the front door without an instance of hesitation.

Sora was stood with her hand was raised, readying to hammer against the door once again. Momentarily she looked dazed; her eyes were wide and lips were slightly parted, like the cliché deer or rabbit caught in the headlights of an oncoming car; but it didn't take her too long to snap out of that trance.

"How could you!" Sora growled. With the arm that was already partly in the air, she swung it back and struck me hard across the face with the palm of her hand. I groaned as the stinging sensation burst through my cheek and immediately pressed my hand against the reddening area of skin. Although it stung like crazy, I knew I deserved a lot worse.

Within the first few minutes, I learnt from Sora that Daisuke had turned up at her apartment a couple of hours ago, eyes bloodshot and trembling like wildfire.

"I've never seen Daisuke in such a state before," Sora said firmly when we stood face to face in the living room. My stomach flipped when the unmistakable creaking sound of my rusty bed springs danced over the awkward atmosphere. To my dismay, Sora's eyes quickly locked onto my bedroom door.

"Who's in there?"

Part of me wanted to lie and say it was Daisuke, but obviously there'd be no way in hell she'd believe that.

"Who's in where?" I feebly attempted to delay the inevitable. However, knowing all to well she wasn't going to get an answer, or at least a truthful one, Sora marched straight past me. I was desperate to reach out and stop her but realised such an action would only multiple my guilt, as well as her disappointment.

Unfortunately, Sora pushed open the door, just in time to see Yamato standing stark naked in the middle of the bedroom.

"Oh for God's sake," she hissed as she quickly spun around and muttered for him to put some clothes on; her cheeks were now an interesting shade of rosy red.

"It's not what it looks like!" I quickly exclaimed, before feeling completely ridiculous as Sora stared at me in disbelief. "Ok, it is what it looks like, but..."

"...Unbelievable, you have the guts to invite Yamato here, after shattering Dai's heart?"

"Sora, I didn't..."

"...Tai didn't invite me," Yamato's voice overlapped mine, announcing the truth as he hurried out from the bedroom now dressed in his jeans and one of my t-shirts. Sora's eyes instantly darted over towards him. "I came here on my own accord."

"Oh, so that makes the situation a whole lot better does it?" Sora growled sarcastically before she glared back over in my direction. She was starting to calm down; her posture was a lot more lax than before. I knew initially she wanted to scream at Yamato and call him selfish, but no doubt she was now aware he had travelled all the way here to check up on me.

I held back my anxiety as Sora instructed me and Yamato to sit down on the sofa.

"Tai, the slap was on behalf of Dai," Sora clarified as she sat between us. "I'm not sure if he already gave you one, but I sure as hell would have."

I sighed, rubbing a hand against the hand-print welt Sora had surely left on my cheek.

"He spent last night at Ken's, Tai," Sora revealed a clear inflection of disapproval surrounded her tone. At hearing those words my chest immediately tightened and the fingers on my right hand dug firmly into the arm of the sofa.

"Shit, he didn't; they didn't? Did they?" My voice was strained and panicked. I felt sickened at the very thought of Daisuke rolling around in bed with another guy, especially Ken. How hypocritical of me...

"Whilst Miyako was sleeping," Sora tapped her fingernails against her skinny jeans. "Regardless, I'm straying away from the main issue here. It's plain and simple; you cheated on him and he found out. Now, you know all too well that you can't have them both, so a decision has to be made."

"Decision?" I echoed; I hadn't even had to the time to think about it. Perhaps that was where I'd gone wrong... Too busy living in the moment to worry about the consequences.

"Clearly you've already made one." Sora was daring to test the waters. She had a fantastic technique of extracting the reactions she desired from pretty much anyone; it was such a great ability I had not even been aware of it back in those days.

"No I haven't," I argued. I was sorta being honest, but my mind still felt heavy and jumbled, similar to the trunk full of broken, pointless trinkets my mum kept underneath her bed. At least those could be discarded and eventually forgotten about.

"I think you have. From how Dai told it, you didn't even convince him to stay."

I didn't want to believe that, but a niggling sensation in the pit of my stomach informed me otherwise of the truth. I'd told Daisuke that I loved him, but had that in itself been enough to reassure him? No, I decided, it hadn't. Words were meaningless without the actions to match them.

"At least have the decency to give him some sort of an excuse," Sora urged, "it's the least you owe him."

That was something I could agree with; I did indeed owe it to him. I'd acted rather pathetically after he had confronted me and I couldn't help but regret it. Then there were the phone calls I still couldn't recollect; maybe Dai would have the answers?

"Ok, where is he?" I started to climb to my feet. However, Sora only grabbed onto my arm and pulled me back down onto the sofa. A frown fell across my face.

"It's best you don't contact Dai or the others for the time being; they aren't too pleased with you. You as well , Yama."

Yamato, who'd been sitting in deadly silence, instantly turned his head to the side.

"Who else knows?" He asked in a stone-cold voice, his eyes stubbornly fixed on Sora who was somewhat taken back by the harsh delivery of his question.

"M-Mimi and Koushiro."

I was expecting to hear those two names. Sora and Mimi gossiped like a majority of girls I knew, and since Mimi was very close to Koushiro (although at that stage, they still claimed they weren't dating!), it was only natural for him to find out through her.

"Timmy as well." Sora announced after a few seconds of hesitation. Yamato bit down on his lip and ran his fingers through his messy hair as he moved his gaze to the floor. His shame-faced reaction wasn't a surprise. Timmy was once the keyboard slash rhythm guitar player in his old band (The Teenage Wolves) who he had bonded well with. Sora had been dating the guy for just over three years now, so it was only natural for her to tell him.

"And obviously Ken knows, and Yolei has probably found out by now," Sora added quickly.

"So basically everyone knows, except Jyou?" I grumbled, placing one hand against my forehead. Sora exhaled deeply. As she stood up she momentarily squeezed my shoulder, before turning her attention back towards Yamato.

"I need a word alone with you," Sora added sternly, like a teacher who was about to tell a student off.

Yamato arched an eyebrow in a quizzical manner.

"What about?"

"I think you know." There was an ominous edge to Sora's tone, one that made me feel uneasy. Obviously their private conversation involved me, and a truth that was less than willing to be spilt.

It would hurt a lot more than I anticipated.

D-Angel: So yeah, I pray that wasn't too bad. Didn't want to give you all information overload, but wanted to establish the damage that's been caused because of Tai/Yama acting like horny rabbits on Viagra. Do not fear, you'll learn all about the enigmatic phone calls which Tai has 'conveniently' forgotten about, and more drama will certainly ensue.

Tai: Great, thanks... As if there isn't enough already!

D-Angel: Hush you! Else I'll pair you up with a Digimon and write some dodgy furry fic :P

Tai: Oh God no!

Yama: -Comforts Tai with hugs-

D-Angel: -Videos the hawt action-

Yama: -Slowly edges out the room with Tai-

D-Angel: Oh, I see how it is... Fine, no dinner for you two! -Clears throat- Anyways, I hope to do a mini time lapse in the next chapter (or possibly the one after that); maybe only by a few months? I'll have a think about it :) As always, suggestions and your feedback is very much welcome! Be honest, and criticise constructively if needs be (helps me out muchly).

Thanks for the reviews and comments so far, you guys are so fricking lovely! I'll be updating Cup of Lust again next since the next chapter is going to be an enjoyable to write; I'd best start up on it I guess, may have it out at the end of July. Bed Full of Mems is likely to get its next update in August, so I hope you all can wait until then.

That's about it, take care, and I'll see you next chapter (as always!)

D-Angel

07/07/11

22 days until I am 21... for the third year running ;)