Natalie attempted to open her eyes slowly but nauseating dizziness forced them shut again.
"It's okay, kiddo. It takes a few minutes to get used to, especially the first time." Reva said as she gently brushed the hair away from Natalie's face
She realized that she was lying on the ground, her head in Reva's lap but the memory of what had happened to bring her here was fuzzy. She opened her eyes again and tried to take in her surroundings which only left her even more disoriented and near panic. Reva helped her to sit up and she seemed to remember something about the walls. They had been counting the walls. She turned her head slowly as she counted the wall in the unfamiliar room. One, two, three . . . She swallowed hard as she took in the fourth solid wall where the shimmering void should be. Where were they? She felt a rush of sudden sensation and overwhelming emotions that left her feeling shaken. She pulled her knees up towards her chest and buried her head in her arms.
"I'm going to get you some water. That always help." Reva rubbed her back gently.
The thought of Reva leaving her alone made her as terrified as a child in the dark but she couldn't find her voice to beg her to stay. She didn't know what was wrong with her and that scared her more than anything else she had ever experienced.
"Is she okay?" Todd Manning asked when Reva slipped quietly into the room.
"Not really. The first time is hell, especially if you don't know what to expect. It would probably help if you would go in there and talk to her."
He looked toward the door thoughtfully. He wanted nothing more than to go in there and comfort his niece but he finally shook his head. "No, the less she knows about my involvement in all this, the better, for her sake. I want her to get through this with her career still intact."
"I'll go talk to her." The young man who had been standing unobserved behind Todd offered.
"You're the man Miles contacted?" Reva studied him. He was tall with dark blonde hair and hazelnut eyes. She found herself captivated by his eyes.
"That would be me." He said with a smile that gave Reva a little flutter.
"We appreciate all your help but I don't know how she's going to respond to someone she doesn't know. She's innately suspicious of strangers, especially right now."
"Don't worry. I'm very trustworthy. I have a way of making things happen the way they're supposed to happen."
Todd looked at him" You do understand that she's not going to be . . ."
"I know." He picked up the glass of water and stepped into the other room.
"Did you see those eyes?" Reva fanned herself as she turned back to Todd. "I'm old enough to be his mother and I'm all a twitter here."
Natalie heard the door open and the sound of footsteps that didn't sound like the familiar click of Reva's heels but still she couldn't bring herself to look up and see who was there.
"Natalie." A man's voice said her name softly. She sensed rather than saw him kneel beside her, to her shock she found herself launching into this strangers arms.
"It's okay. Don't be afraid. Everything's going to be okay. I'm here to help put things right. Don't be afraid." He whispered soothingly in her ear, as if it were a secret between just them
"I don't know what's wrong with me." She told him.
"You're just feeling overwhelmed and that's normal. As a SoapWorld character, unlike BookWorld, you're in a constant state of being written, a state of constantly controlled change. In SoapWorld your emotions are carefully controlled, whether it be fear, happiness or even rage. You don't normally have to cope with more than one emotion at a time but here, well it's much more complex. You can feel many things all at the same time. You have to learn to control your own feeling and emotions here. You'll learn quickly and it will get easier. I promise.'
The sound of his voice was warm and reassuring. His confidence gave her strength and the feel of his arms around her made her feel safe, protected, like nothing cold touch her while she was with him. She was gradually able to get the influx of emotions under control until the prevailing one was embarrassment. She finally pulled up into the face of the man who had been comforting her.
She was immediately drawn to his eyes. He had amazing eyes. She was accustomed to looking into John's piercing blue eyes which were electrifying and intense but this man's eyes were compelling and gentle. He held her gaze until she began to breathe easier and finally was able to get herself under control.
He continued to look into her face as if he were searching for something. Finally he smiled and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "It's incredible. You look just like her but you're really not "my" Natalie."
"Your Natalie?" She asked but he just shook his head.
"Here, you should drink this." He handed her a glass of water." "I'm Curran, by the way."
"No last name."
"Just Curran."
She took a sip of the water and then turned the glass around in her hand as she looked around the room. "Where are we, Curran?"
Before he could answer her the door opened and Reva stepped back into the room. Natalie wondered where she had been all this time but didn't get a chance to ask.
"Hello, again, hot stuff." She grinned at Curran. "So, what do you have for us?"
"I think I managed to acquire everything you requested."
"I'm impressed. I know we didn't give you a lot of time."
"Miles did impress upon me the need for haste in this endeavor."
"Miles?" Natalie questioned. "Would someone like to tell me just where are we and what are we doing here?"
"Ah, that peevish tone I know so well. Someone's feeling better."
Natalie started to struggle to her feet and Curran immediately held out his hand to help her. "I don't know you from any of the SoapWorlds."
"No, I was created by a WAIF."
"So, that's where we are? We're inside of fanfiction." She looked around the room again. "I thought we had a non-interference policy when it cam to FanFic. We monitor only. No one in the SoapWorld has ever gone inside."
"Well, that is where my resourceful Miles comes in." Reva explained. "You should keep an eye on him. He's being used as a gopher by all different departments and he's gotten pretty knowledgeable, not only about how things work in the Guild but about each departments own little shortcuts. Since everyone thinks he's just shy of an idiot they don't pay attention to all the things he's learning from them."
"I don't understand. What does that have to do with the WAIF's and Fanfic?"
"Miles wanted to help you. He believed that you were right about the threat to SoapWorld and he realized that the characters in FanFic don't have the same rules and boundaries as SoapWorld." Curran explained. "SoapWorld is dictated by the whims of many writers who are trying to appeal to a target audience. At least in theory. They miss the mark as often as they get it right. FanFiction has very little limitations. We are only bound by the writer's imagination who has no one to please but themselves. All Miles had to do was find the right one."
"I don't understand. I've read Roxy's reports on FanFic so I know that John and I have a lot of people on our side but you . . ." She remembered the loving look in his eyes and the way he had talked of "his" Natalie.
"Well, let's just say that Miles found a character that would do whatever it takes to ensure your happiness. Whatever that means for you." He said simply.
"Okay. But what exactly are we supposed to from within FanFic." She felt a chill as she saw the look that passed between Curran and Reva.
"We're not in FanFic. Welcome to reality, kiddo." Reva said with a flourish.
"Reality? Reva that is impossible."
"Not impossible, merely improbable. And that is what Sudsers like us are best at." Reva said.
"It was that void that you could see that no one else was aware of." Curran said gently.
"The fourth wall."
"Exactly. You know the intricate dynamics of SoapWorld. You exist as both written word and on film. The films are made in large studios on sets which is why there are only three walls in SoapWorld." He continued.
"Because the camera has to go somewhere."
"Right but most characters aren't aware of the inconsistency. But you were aware and that created a sort of door for you, to step outside of your reality and into theirs."
"I think I may need to sit down again." She sighed
"That's why it was important for us to leave from DS and not Llanview. We couldn't come blundering out onto their set. It doesn't due to have characters meeting their real life counterparts. It can get . . . messy" Reva said. "Curran helped to arrange a safe place to make the leap.'
Natalie was silent for a long moment while she tried to absorb this new development. "So, we're in reality. What do we do know?"
"We are gong to find out just who Dr. Saybrooke has been spending so much time talking to out here."
"Am dust how do you propose we do that?"
"It's actually much easier than you might think. You have the number Marty has been calling but it will have to wait until tomorrow morning. It's very late here." Curran said, holding the door open for them to leave.
The followed him outside and Natalie came to a complete stop as she felt a breeze, a real breeze brush against her skin. She looked up at the sky and took in the stars. She thought of all the time she had spent with John on the roof, and she wished that he was with her now. "We don't get to spend a lot of time outside in SoapWorld." She said when Reva put a hand on her shoulder.
"Ladies, your chariot awaits." Curran called. He was standing next to a car, he had opened the doors for them.
"Wow. You are impressive. How did you manage to get us a car on such short notice?"
"I'm a very capable person. I was written that way."
Reva took the keys from him and they climbed into the car. She started the engine and then inexplicably the car began to move.
"What the hell are you doing?" Natalie asked as she clutched the door handle.
"I'm driving us to the hotel Curran so graciously booked for us."
"Well, you're obviously not doing something right." She cringed as they were surrounded by other cars and she shut her eyes tight against the lights of the oncoming traffic.
"What's the matter with you? Haven't you ever been in a car before?"
"Of course I have." Natalie snapped. "You sit down and the car stays put. You play with the steering wheel a little until you see a light and then there's a lot of screaming and sound effects before the fade out."
Reva laughed. "Well this is real driving without low budgets so hang on." She shifted gears and pressed her foot on the accelerator while Natalie covered her hands with her eyes.
"Behave yourself, Reva." Curran admonished gently from the backseat as he placed a reassuring hand upon on Natalie's shoulder.
Curran walked them to their room and opened the door for them. "Are you going to be staying here too?" Natalie asked, feeling a faint blush of embarrassment as she looked at the two beds.
"No, I am nothing if not a gentleman. I will see you two ladies in the morning." He turned to Natalie and looked into her eyes. "If there is anything you need, anything at all. I'll be here."
Reva stood at the door and watched Curran walk away. "I'm telling you, that boy has buns Betty Crocker couldn't have made." She whistled appreciatively.
"Should Joshua be worried?"
"I'm just admiring. Did you know Miles got some scoops on him and he really is a . . ."
"I was just wondering who taught you how to drive, Reva?"
Reva scowled. "Are we still on that? I'm a wonderful driver. I got you here all in one piece didn't i?"
"Yes, I know." Natalie said pointedly.
Reva glanced at her, understanding full well what Natalie was really asking. "You want to know how I know how to drive in the Outland?"
"The thought did cross my mind."
"I'm a Guider. We've been around a long time. We created most of the policies that are still followed by the Guild today."
"I know all of that."
"It also means that we have certain . . . 'policies' that we don't necessarily share with the rest of the Guild."
Natalie thought about not only what Reva was saying but what she was implying. "So, you're telling me that the Guiders have been exploring the Outland for some time.'
"BookWorld has had an Outlander liaison for some time now. Our very existence hinges upon so many different factors, all controlled from the Outland that it makes no sense not to know as much as we can about how things work out here. At first it was purely academic we have to strive for believability in spite of the most improbable of plot devices."
"And does it work?"
"Sometimes but not significantly. There are some things there are just no help for. I know care how much believability you have, when you take the Slut of Springfield and smack her in the middle of Amish country no amount of amnesia plot devices can make that look any less shit.'
"Reva!"
"What?" She blinked innocently.
"You just . . . you didn't. . ." Natalie took a deep breath, growing a little tired of Reva's ability to make her sound like an idiot. "You didn't wait for the interruption. You can't say that, you can only imply it. You didn't give me a chance to cut you of."
"Outland, kiddo, remember. There are no censors her. We can say whatever we like. Go ahead, give it a try."
"No thanks."
"Well, unless you have any other questions. I'm going to take a shower."
Natalie quickly stood and eyed her warily. "What do you mean?" She asked. "I mean there's really only one use for a shower scene and no offence but I'm not . . ."
Reva laughed." "Okay I'm only going to say this one more time. This is the Outland and a shower is a wonderful experience one can enjoy alone."
"What you do in your shower is your business. I'm not judging."
"Well, you may want to consider taking a shower yourself or you could start to become a little conspicuous." Reva said pinching her nose close.
"What are you talking about? We have assumed cleanliness." She crossed her arms in a gesture of arrogance with just a hint of doubt.
"You sound like a diplomat asserting his diplomatic immunity. The laws don't apply to me. Your assumed cleanliness does not extend past SoapWorld, sugar. Out here you're just another one of the unwashed masses." She sauntered into the bathroom still laughing.
Natalie sat down on one of the beds and looked around. All of this felt so surreal and she felt incredibly lonely, she had never felt so far away from the people she loved. She laid down on the bed feeling completely drained and drifted off to sleep.
She wasn't sure how much time had passed when something woke her. She held her breath as she strained her ears but heard nothing but the pounding of her own heart. She glanced over at the other bed and breathed a sigh of relief when she saw Reva's sleeping form. She slipped out of bed and gently touched Reva's shoulder.
"What's wrong?' Reva asked, groggily.
"Do you hear that?"
Reva was silent for a long moment, her eyes darting around the darkened room. "I don't hear a thing."
"Exactly. There's no dialogue, there's no background music. There's . . . nothing."
Reva smiled gently. "That's silence. Real silence and It's not so bad once you get used to it."
Natalie nodded but found the silence no less unsettling. Reva smiled knowingly and scooted over so Natalie could sit down beside her. "Do you want to talk?"
"I'm not a child." Natalie protested but sat down. "Reva, if I ask you something will you give me a real answer."
"I'll try."
"Do you really think that this could work? John and I.?"
"Why not? If it doesn't work out Quentin Collins sure seems to be interested." She teased gently.
"Quinton Collins is a ghost."
"So was I once. . Don't knick it until you've tried it."
"I'm trying to be serious here. Can we really make it? After everything that you and Joshua have been through, is it still wroth it?"
"And I thought this was going to be a hard question." Reva smiled gently as she slipped an arm around Natalie's shoulders. "It is absolutely worth it."
"How do you keep doing it?"
"Because Bud and I are always. I said once that I have always felt that we were married, no matter where we were or who we were with. We are husband and wife."
"I don't know if I can be that strong." Natalie laid her head on Reva's shoulder.
"Yes, you can. I told you, we have a lot in common. You can't allow yourself to believe that you have no control. How do you think the super couples last? They knew how to assert themselves. They never allowed a plot device to come between them. You can do that. It doesn't matter what they write for you they can't change what you and John have together. You have to hang on to it, kiddo. No matter what." She glanced down at Natalie but she had all ready fallen back to sleep. "I'm coming bud." She whispered into the darkness.