Disclaimer: Just playing with SM's characters. The plot is all mine though, so don't steal it! Stealing is bad.
A/N: Thank you so much for reading & reviewing! Happy New Year! I hope you all had some nice holidays. All right, friends…this is a HUGE chapter. There's some citrus, and there is a BIG angst and violence warning for this chapter. Grab the tissues, because you might need them. I'm looking at you, PINKSAPPHYR.
As always, HUGE thank you to my friend and beta eternally_addicted for holding my hand through this chapter and making all of my messy ideas make sense.
I find the answers aren't so clear
Wish I could find a way to disappear
All these thoughts they make no sense
I find bliss in ignorance
Nothing seems to go away
Over and over again
Just like before…
Everything you say to me
Takes me one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe
Cause I'm one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
- Linkin Park, "One Step Closer"
Chapter 9: One Step Closer
Age 25
They were sitting in silence for the past couple of minutes.
Edward thought the chairs in the room were too soft, and Bella thought the air conditioner was on too low.
Neither of them knew what to say to each other, and neither of them knew how to begin. This talk was a long time coming. Edward finally took a deep breath and spoke.
"How…how should we do this?"
Bella looked up from the floor to see a nervous Edward staring back at her. She shrugged her shoulders slightly.
"I…I guess we could take turns telling our side of the story," Bella hesitantly suggested.
Edward sighed. He really didn't see any other way to do it.
"Okay."
Bella swallowed nervously. Her throat felt dry and her hands were growing clammy.
"Will you promise to…to not lose your temper?" Bella nearly whispered.
Edward bristled at her question, but he knew she had a right to ask it. He hadn't exactly been in control the last time they had a conversation that lasted longer than a minute, and he owed it to Bella since she had agreed to talk to him.
"I promise," Edward whispered back.
The air around them seemed to grow thicker, and Bella took a deep breath. Since she was the one who initiated this little meeting, she decided that she should be the one to start talking. She said a silent prayer before she began, and opened her mouth, recounting the memories that they had both tried to bury for so long.
Age 16, September
"Can I touch you, baby?" Edward murmured against Bella's ear.
Bella squirmed and panted, her back arching and desperate to feel Edward's skin against her own. They had spent the night together, first, celebrating Bella's birthday with dinner with her parents, and were now parked down by the beach in the back of Edward's truck, bundled up under sleeping bags. The night was clear and for once, there was no rain in the sky. The moon cast a bluish silvery glow and Bella couldn't help but stare at Edward's beauty in the light. As if the touch of his skin wasn't enough to make her head spin.
"Yes…please, yes…" Bella panted.
Edward pressed his lips against Bella's neck to stifle his moan. The sound of her begging and panting made him as hard as a rock, and he wanted nothing more than to relieve his aching. However, it was Bella's birthday, and he wanted to make her happy…well, maybe "happy" wasn't quite what he was aiming for, but he was sure making her come would make her happy.
Bella had worn a nice blouse and a skirt to dinner that night. At her father's insistence, they went to the nicest place in town, the Lodge, and had steak dinners. Edward had been wearing black jeans and a green button up shirt that made his eyes stand out even more. Bella had swooned when Edward had first showed up that night on her doorstep with a big bouquet of red roses. She insisted that he not get her anything since she knew what his hard earned money from the coffee shop was going towards. However, she had to admit that the roses were beautiful and certainly made her feel special.
"Edward…" Bella moaned as Edward's lips and mouth moved in sync down her body.
Edward didn't hold back his moan and his breath tickled the skin of Bella's bare breasts. He loved to touch Bella's skin. It was so soft and delicate, and in the moonlight it was luminous. Her breasts were small and perfect and the first time he had seen them, Edward had almost felt like he was looking at his first pair of boobs all over again. He licked at one of the rosy pink nipples and Bella cried out, her back arching and pushing her chest into Edward's face.
As Edward's tongue and lips continued their explorations of Bella's breasts, his right hand slid over the soft and smooth skin of stomach. His fingertips paused to caress her hipbones before he teased the hem of her panties. He wasn't sure about letting Bella lose her skirt, and he had definitely re-thought that decision when he saw the pair of lacy blue panties she had on underneath. Apparently they were a birthday present from Angela, and he definitely felt like he needed to write Angela a "thank you" card. In the end, Edward's smaller head won out, and Bella was still clad in only her tiny, lacy blue panties.
Bella's breath caught in her throat as Edward's hand slipped under the hem of her panties and she gasped as she felt his fingers. Edward groaned when his fingers slipped down to a place where no one else had ever touched Bella, and she couldn't stop her hips from bucking against Edward's hand, as the feelings that had begun to course through her body overwhelmed her. Edward's lips found hers again and Bella was lost in the feelings. It felt like Edward was everywhere and Bella could barely even think. The sounds that she heard herself making were ones that she had never heard from herself before, and her hips rolled and bucked against Edward.
Edward felt like he was going to explode. Bella was so alluring it was ridiculous. She was so beautiful and sexy, and the fact that she blushed and stammered whenever Edward told her so, just served to turn him on even more. He felt the sounds of Bella's cries and moans increase against his lips, and when he pulled back, Bella was panting and moaning loudly.
"Edward…oh, God…I…I…" Bella gasped loudly and her breath caught in her throat as her body seemed to tense up and her eyes clenched shut.
Edward groaned as he slowed the movements of his right hand. The sight of Bella having her first orgasm was one of the hottest things he had ever seen, and he definitely knew he would be replaying that image again in his head when he was in the shower later that night. He placed soft kisses around Bella's face as he withdrew his hand. Bella's chest was still heaving from the aftermath of her pleasure and Edward smiled, proud of himself, and happy that he was able to be like this with Bella, and that she trusted him enough to let him. They still hadn't revisited their conversation from a few weeks ago, but Edward was sure now that he loved Bella. He just needed to find the right time to tell her.
Bella's brown eyes fluttered open slowly. She had never felt anything like that before in her life. She had been surprised when Edward let them get as far as they did. They had only been dating for a little over two months, but Bella certainly felt something different for Edward. She remembered their talk from a few weeks ago, and she was pretty certain that she was definitely in love with Edward. He meant so much to her, and she couldn't imagine him not being around, and she was always terrified that his father would do something unpredictable that would take Edward away from her. They were still planning how they were going to catch his father, and Bella just prayed that it would work out soon.
When she looked up, she saw Edward smiling down at her softly. She reached up and stroked his jaw tenderly before Edward leaned down and pressed his lips to hers softly.
"Happy birthday, Bella," Edward murmured against her lips.
Bella smiled and sighed happily as Edward lowered himself to the side and pulled Bella against him. She snuggled against his chest and closed her eyes. Thoughts of the rest of the world were far away from both of their minds. Bella whispered happily before she felt herself drifting off.
"Best birthday ever."
"Don't pout, Bella. You'll see Edward in like, five minutes," Angela said with a roll of her eyes.
Angela demanded that Edward let her pick Bella up for school the day after her birthday. She knew that Bella and Edward were going to be spending time together after Bella's birthday dinner, and she knew that Bella was going to be putting her birthday present to use. Angela wanted to hear all about Bella's birthday evening.
"Now…spill. How did Edward like your present?"
Bella's cheeks heated, but she had no one else to talk to about these kinds of things. She certainly wasn't going to talk to her mother about rounding the bases with Edward.
"He ummm…we…we might've rounded third base…" Bella stuttered out.
Angela squealed and Bella hung on to the door handle for dear life, scared that Angela was going to crash the car in her excitement.
"Did he use his fingers or his tongue?"
Bella blushed even further when her eyes rested on her own fingers in her lap.
"His fingers," Bella whispered, with a small smile on her face.
Angela chuckled and nodded her head. "Well, your man does have some long fingers…"
"Ang!" Bella cried.
"What? He does right?"
Bella could help but smile widely. "Yeah…he does."
The girls giggled as Angela made the turn down the road towards the school, passing some of the houses nearby. As they turned, Bella let out a scream that had Angela slamming on the breaks.
"STOP THE CAR!"
Both girls stared, equally horrified by the sight of the figure leaning against the wall by one of the houses. Bella immediately tugged and fumbled with her seat belt before throwing the door open and tumbling out. Tears welled up and spilled over her eyes as she staggered forward on her feet.
Edward knew that Angela would drive this way. He didn't want to be waiting for them at the school…not like this. It would cause too much attention, and he knew that Bella would see him standing here. He knew this, because she always mentioned how she thought the wall in front of this house didn't seem to match Forks. He had lowered his hood on his jacket when he saw Angela's car turn the corner, and he caught Bella easily in his arms, despite the throb in his ribs.
"Edward…" Bella sobbed, her hands clutching at his shirt. She quickly pulled away, scared that she was hurting him further.
"What…when…he…" Bella stuttered. She heard Angela get out of her car and Edward sigh.
"He never has a reason, Bella. My mom didn't even provoke him this time," Edward said quietly.
He was sporting a black eye, cut over his eyebrow, a split lip, and scratches and bruising up the other side of his face. That was only what was visible. Underneath his shirt, he had bruises all over his ribs and chest. Bella's hands fluttered around his face, unsure of where she could touch him, and Edward caught her right hand, placing a kiss on her palm.
"We should go to the police, Bella's father," Angela said.
Edward shook his head.
"But you guys are going to catch him!" Angela cried. "You guys have a plan!"
Bella looked a little sheepish as Edward looked at her with his brows raised. Angela was her best friend, and she trusted her with her life and she told her everything. Bella knew that Angela would never tell a soul if there was something Bella didn't want her to share, and Angela hadn't told anyone about the things Bella shared with her about Edward.
"Sorry I blurted that out," Angela said. "But we need to tell Bella's father!"
"It won't do any good," Edward said, shaking his head.
Bella sniffled, her tears running down her cheeks. She almost wanted to shove Edward for being so stubborn. She thought they had been through all of this before. Even her father was on board with catching Ed Masen.
"Please, Edward…" Bella pleaded in a whisper. "I love you. I can't stand to see you get hurt anymore."
"What did you say?" Edward asked softly, tilting Bella's face up so he could look her in the eye.
Tears were falling down her cheeks and her eyes and nose were red, but Edward thought she was still so beautiful, even despite all of the bad things that were going on around them.
"I said I love you," Bella said, louder this time, not caring that Angela was standing there to hear this too. It wasn't how she planned to tell him, but seeing him like this, there wasn't any way that she couldn't tell him.
Edward reached up with both hands and cupped Bella's cheeks softly, thumbing away her tears.
"Oh, beautiful girl, I love you too," Edward whispered. "More than I could possibly say."
Edward leaned forward and pressed his lips to Bella's forehead before pulling her gently to his chest. Bella wrapped her arms around his waist and held him to her. She loved him so much, and they needed to get Edward and his mother away from that monster of man Ed Masen, Senior. Bella pulled back and swiped at her cheeks.
"Come on, we need to go see my father. Ang, can you take us?"
Before Angela could answer, Edward caught Bella's hand in his own, holding her back.
"Bella, there's nothing we can do."
"Edward- -"
"My father's disappeared, Bella. He took off in my truck. He's gone."
Age 16, December
"My mother is probably starting to think I'm making a habit of spending the night at Angela's house," Bella giggled.
"Mmmm…" Edward hummed, his eyes closed. "I would like to hope this is a little more fun than spending the night at Angela's house."
Bella giggled again and turned, placing a kiss on Edward's bare chest. Both of them were thankful for the Christmas break. There was no school and they were able to spend as much time as they wanted to together. A lot had happened in the past couple of months, but Bella decided that there was nothing better than spending time with Edward in his secret house by the Sol Duc, and tangled naked with him in the bed. Edward knew he should move and get rid of the used condom he still wore, but he couldn't bring himself to move out of Bella's embrace. It had become his favorite place to be in the past couple of months.
There hadn't been a sign of Edward's father or Edward's truck in months. The last time had been at the end of September, and the truck had been spotted in Seattle. After Edward had been beaten the night of Bella's birthday, Charlie put out the word about Ed Masen when he was told that he was missing. The hit in Seattle had come not a week later, and Charlie had deputies on the lookout across the whole state, but Ed Masen hadn't been spotted again. It had made Bella nervous initially, and Edward's mother was surprisingly unemotional about the whole thing. She had been working at a bed & breakfast outside of Port Angeles, and Edward didn't see much of her anymore. When he did see her however, she was happier, but still held a sense of timidity about her, like she was scared of something still.
Bella had certainly helped take Edward's mind off of things. They were still wary of Ed Masen being out there somewhere, but Bella noticed the change in Edward. He still worked at the coffee shop part time, but he seemed much happier when Bella would visit him there, and when they hung out in his little cottage hideaway. Since Ed Masen had stolen Edward's truck, and the only other car they had was Ed's Mustang, which Elizabeth drove, Edward was without a mode of transportation. Luckily, Bella had gotten her license and her parents had gotten her a truck. It was a hulking red, beast of a vehicle, but it got her where she needed to go, and most of the time Edward was the one driving it anyway.
Things were peaceful and Bella and Edward's relationship was flourishing now that Edward wasn't constantly watching out for his mother. It was Halloween when Bella first told her parents the lie that she was spending the night at Angela's, but instead went with Edward to his little house by the river. Edward made love to Bella for the first time that night, almost feeling like he was a virgin himself all over again. There were some tears, and Edward felt like a complete douche for making Bella cry, but as the pain faded away, Edward was able to make Bella feel good, and Bella had felt so loved and worshiped.
Bella shifted in Edward's arms and pushed herself up so that she could look at him. There was a lazy smile on Edward's face, and he couldn't stop the soft moan from leaving his lips when Bella sat up and he caught sight of her naked breasts. Even though Bella was better about being naked in front of Edward, her cheeks still flushed. She leaned back down, pressing her chest against his. There was something that she wanted to ask him, even though he was only a Junior and she was a Sophomore.
"What do you think you're going to do after high school?"
Edward was a little caught off guard by the question and felt his brows furrow.
"I hadn't really thought about it," Edward said quietly.
"You're going to graduate a year before I will," Bella whispered, her head ducking down to avoid Edward's gaze.
She wasn't really sure why she thought about asking Edward right now. Bella guessed that maybe it was because of all of the seniors of Forks High who were trying to figure out their own plans for after high school. Though they still had time before that was really an issue, Bella was still curious about what Edward thought. After all, it wasn't looking like Ed Masen was going to be that big of a concern anymore. However, Bella was nervous about the fact that Edward would graduate before she would. Would he leave her behind and go away to school? Would he move to Seattle? Would he break up with her? Would he wait for her? There were too many questions for Bella to even narrow down.
"Why are you asking me this?" Edward asked. His tone of voice wasn't upset or irritated, and he was a little confused and interested in Bella's answer.
"I'm not sure," Bella replied quietly.
"I guess I haven't really thought about it," Edward said with a sigh, pulling Bella closer to his chest.
"Oh…" Bella trailed off.
The two were silent, and Edward wasn't sure what Bella had wanted him to say. Because of the way things were with his father, he hadn't really been thinking about a life after high school. All he wanted was to get enough money to get himself and his mother away from his father for good. He hadn't thought about college or doing something that was just for him. Bella's questions though were making him start to realize that now that his father was gone, there were a whole lot of possibilities. However, when he thought about the places he wanted to see and the things that he wanted to do, there was one thing that was always constant.
"All I know is that I'm not going anywhere without you," Edward whispered, turning to look down at Bella's face.
Bella's face was shocked, but it slowly morphed into happiness and joy.
"Do you mean it?" Bella asked.
Edward leaned down and kissed her softly.
"Of course I mean it, baby."
Bella giggled as she snuggled against Edward's side. Edward smiled to himself, loving the sound of Bella's laughter. There wasn't a more beautiful sound in the world as far as he was concerned. Well…maybe the sound of her moaning his name. He shook his head quickly. They had already had sex twice that night, and the poor girl could use a breather.
"Where do you want to go?" Edward asked, his hand making lazy strokes up and down Bella's back.
"You mean for college?" Bella asked, tilting her head up to look at him.
Edward shrugged. "I don't know if the college route is for me, baby. One of my friends in California, well…he just got signed to PSA, the Professional Surfing Association. I was thinking that might be a good gig."
"So you would be traveling all over the world? Surfing?" Bella said quietly. She wasn't sure where she would fit in if Edward decided to do that.
"You would be coming with me, Bella," Edward replied before quickly adding, "If you wanted to that is."
He was suddenly nervous. Apart from his ability to make a good cup of coffee and dabble at the piano and guitar, Edward wasn't all that skilled at anything. He was an average student, but didn't particularly have the desire to go through more school. The one thing that he was good at, the one thing that he excelled at and possibly saw himself making a future off of was his surfing.
"I could?" Bella asked.
Bella was certainly intrigued by the idea. While she did want to go to college, she wasn't sure what she would study when she got there. She didn't like the idea of going just because everyone else was. Bella didn't want to waste her parent's hard earned money by majoring in something that might not even lead to a career. However, when Edward spoke about surfing, and her going with him to travel the world…that was something Bella liked the sound of.
"Sam, my buddy down in Huntington Beach, his girl Emily travels with him. She just went with him to a competition in Hawaii! The PSA wants her to write like, a weekly newsletter for fans about life on the tour. I bet you could totally help with that if you wanted to! English is your strong suit and all."
Edward knew he was starting to ramble, but he didn't really see any other way he could provide a future for himself or for Bella. He wasn't thinking about his mother because he figured that by the time he graduated, she would be on her feet and hopefully his father would never be in the picture again. Edward was still wary about his father being out there somewhere, but for the first time in his life, he wasn't letting the fear of what his father might do run his life.
"I think I would like that," Bella said, smiling up at Edward.
"The tour goes all over the world, baby. I can't even begin to list the places we could go."
"I've never even left the state of Washington," Bella whispered.
"Then we'll change that, Bella. I promise. Hawaii, Australia, Fiji, New Zealand, Japan, South Africa, France…we'll see it all, Bella."
Bella's ears perked up at the word "France". She had always wanted to go to Europe. In her mind, it was, "you spend enough time learning about these places in History class, you better get to see them all one day".
"You promise, Edward?"
"Oh, baby…I'm gonna show you the world one day."
Age 16, April
"Come on, I forgot something up in the main house."
"Okay," Bella said with a laugh. Edward tugged her hand eagerly, and Bella couldn't help but laugh at his excitement and happiness.
Edward was both excited and nervous. He knew Bella didn't like it when he spent money on her, and constantly told him she'd rather he save it for the future. However, Edward didn't like the idea of not giving Bella any gifts, and he wanted to give her something that wasn't going to wilt and die in a couple of days. He wanted something that wasn't too flashy, since that wasn't Bella's style, and something unique, which Bella definitely was. He had found a heart shaped pendant made of jade, the color Bella often said was her favorite and also happened to be the color of his eyes. The pendant hung on a dark braided chord instead of a chain. Edward couldn't wait to give it to her, but he was also extremely nervous about it.
The couple didn't bother to even look for Elizabeth Masen, even though they had both seen her car home in the driveway. Both were laughing, though neither was sure why, when they finally entered Edward's bedroom. He had been staying in his own room these past months, and was happy for a sense of normalcy returning to his life.
"Edward, what are we doing up here?" Bella asked, slightly out of breath, but a wide smile on her face.
Edward let go of her hand and moved towards his small desk, taking deep breaths to calm himself down. He took the little gold box out of his drawer and turned to face Bella. Bella let out a tiny squeak before covering her mouth with her hand. Her eyes were huge and focused on the box in Edward's hand.
"Edward…" Bella whispered before swallowing heavily.
"I wanted to give you something, and I know that you don't like gifts, but I wanted to give you something that represents how much I love you," Edward said quickly.
Bella's forehead scrunched up in thought.
"But…it's not a special occasion is it? It's not our anniversary and…"
"I know," Edward said with a sigh, walking forward and presenting the box to Bella. "Do I need a special occasion to give you something to show you how much I love you?"
"No!" Bella nearly shouted. "Of course not!"
Bella took the box quickly with shaky fingers and almost fumbled it. A sigh of relief had left Bella's lips earlier when she realized that it wasn't a ring box. She was just too young to think about any sort of rings from anyone, but she couldn't hide the small part of her that was excited about a piece of jewelry from Edward. She lifted the top carefully and gasped, nearly dropping the box again.
"Edward…" Bella barely breathed out, her voice full of awe. "It's…it's so beautiful."
Bella delicately picked up the chord that the jade heart pendant sat on, and held it up in front of her eyes. It was beautiful and unique, just like Edward she thought, and the color was the same as Edward's eyes.
"Do you like it?" Edward asked softly.
"Edward, it's amazing!" Bella cried, stepping forward and grabbing Edward by his shirt and pulling him towards her. She tiptoed and pressed her lips to his eagerly. Edward felt relieved immediately and wrapped his arms around her waist. Bella pulled back, still hanging in Edward's arms.
"Put it on me?" She asked quietly.
Bella turned her back to Edward as he took the necklace from her hand and placed it around her neck and securing the silver clasp at the back. Bella sighed happily when she felt Edward's lips brush against her neck, and she picked the heart pendant up from where it lay against her collarbones so that she could look at it again.
"Now you'll always have my heart with you," Edward murmured against Bella's ear.
Bella craned her neck so that she could look back at Edward.
"I love you, Edward Masen."
Just as their lips were about to touch, Elizabeth Masen's voice called up the stairs.
"Edward? Is that you? Are you home?"
Edward sighed and pressed his forehead against Bella's.
"Yeah, Mom," He called back.
"Come downstairs please."
Edward sighed loudly and looked at Bella. She understood his frustration and turned in his arms, giving Edward a quick peck on the lips.
"Let's go see what she wants," Bella said, starting towards the door and grabbing Edward's hand.
The two were silent as they walked down the stairs hand in hand, but they kept giving each other knowing and happy smiles. When they reached the first floor and the living room, Edward froze so abruptly that Bella ran straight into his back.
"Edward, what the- -"
Bella's voice cut off with a loud gasp.
"Oh…I…I didn't realize Bella was with you, dear," Elizabeth said quietly.
"What the fuck is he doing here?" Edward growled, pushing Bella behind him.
Bella gripped the back of Edward's shirt tightly as she nervously peeked around his arm. Standing in the living room behind Elizabeth Masen was none other than Ed Masen. Bella's grip tightened as Ed stepped forward and placed his arm around Elizabeth's shoulder.
"I've come home, Son," Ed said.
"Bullshit!" Edward spat. "I'm calling Chief Swan."
"Go ahead, Son. There's nothing he can do. I've changed. I've been in rehab and in counseling all these months up in Seattle and then in Port Angeles. I'm better now."
Both Edward and Bella looked Ed over as he spoke. He certainly did look better. His face was clean-shaven, his clothes were clean, he was clean…the young couple wasn't sure what to make of it.
"Edward, he's been getting help," Elizabeth said with a small smile, before she looked up at Ed.
"Are you kidding me?" Edward roared, taking a step forward. Bella clutched even tighter to his shirt, holding him back. Edward turned to look back at her.
"Don't, Edward…" Bella whispered.
"I've been meeting with him to get coffee and talk, Edward. Your father has changed."
Edward felt like he was looking at an alien or something. He couldn't believe what he was hearing.
"You believe him? You really think he's changed?" Edward asked. He was angry and wary.
"I have, Son," Ed spoke up. "I asked your mother if I could come home. So we could work on being a family again."
"A family?" Edward said, laughing darkly. "We haven't been a family since the first time you decided to use me as a punching bag!"
Ed Masen had the nerve to look ashamed. "I'm sorry about that, son…but I'm better now. I've been working with a counselor."
"Bull…" Edward growled. "I'm still calling Chief Swan. Come on, Bella."
Edward and Bella called Charlie from upstairs in his bedroom and he drove over to the Masens' house in record time. Unfortunately, everything Ed Masen has said earlier checked out. He had been in rehab and counseling all of these months, receiving intense treatment, and his doctors felt it was better that he cut all ties with his family members for the time being. Edward didn't trust his father one bit. He was still the smooth talking motherfucker he had always been, and he had a feeling that he was putting one over on everyone. Not on Edward though. Edward knew better. It would only be a matter of time before his father was back to his old ways, and it scared him.
Age 16, Beginning of June
Edward couldn't help but smile to himself as he walked towards the house from his car. Charlie and Renee Swan were going to be spending the weekend in Port Angeles celebrating their anniversary, which meant Bella would be home alone in her house until Sunday afternoon. With the return of his father, the return of Edward's truck had also come along, and Edward had just finished picking up some things for his weekend alone with Bella. He knew that she was just as excited as he was. All that was left to grab was his backpack up in his room.
It was quiet when Edward walked into the house, but he froze as he passed by the kitchen, and watched in horror and then anger as his father bent over the kitchen counter and snorted the white line of powder that lay on the countertop.
"I fucking knew it!" Edward shouted.
Ed Masen stood up quickly, staggering back a few steps and swiping at his nose. Edward was fuming as he stepped into the kitchen.
"I knew you were lying and it was only a matter of time! Where'd you get the money huh? You stealing the money Mom earned?" Edward shouted as he came face to face with his father.
Ed's eyes were glazed over, and Edward knew this wasn't his first hit of the day, so when Ed took an off-balanced swing at Edward's head, Edward had no problem knocking his father's arm away and swung with his own right fist in retaliation.
All Edward could see was red as his father flew back against the counter. Edward's hands flew, connecting with his father's face and body anywhere he could reach. Everything that Edward had held inside, every time his father hit him, every time he took it without fighting back, the fact that his mother never did anything, the tears in Bella's eyes when she saw Edward's cuts and bruises…they all fueled the power behind Edward's punches.
"EDWARD! Edward stop!"
Edward could hear his mother screaming at him, and felt her tugging at his left side. His vision seemed to refocus and he realized that his father was slumped over and not fighting back. Edward stepped back, his chest heaving from anger and exertion.
"Do you see that shit on the counter?" Edward panted. "He's fucking getting high again!"
The sting on Edward's cheek shocked him into silence and he blinked rapidly, trying to make sense of what just happened. His mother shoved him again, pushing him away. Edward realized that his mother had just slapped him in the face. His left hand instantly came up to his now throbbing cheek as he just stared at his mother in horror.
"What do you think you're doing, Edward?" His mother screamed, and she knelt down, cradling his father's head in her lap. "You could've killed him!"
Edward was too shocked to even speak. After everything that his father had done to him, after everything his mother had seen…she was…she was worried about him?
"Get away from us, Edward! I can't believe you!" His mother continued to scream.
After everything Edward had gone through to protect his mother and keep her from being on the receiving end of his father's abuse, his mother was more worried about his father than she had even been about her own son. Edward didn't know what to think, and all he knew was that he needed Bella. He turned and fled, his mother's screams at his back, and jumped in his car, heading straight for Bella.
He fumbled with the keys Bella had given to him earlier, and he was thankful that the Swans were out of town. He could hear the shower going upstairs and was thankful that he was also earlier than Bella was expecting him. He stumbled into the kitchen and to the sink. His father's blood covered his hands and he could feel them shaking as he tried to wash the blood away. He was still in shock, and the realization that his mother chose his father over him…it felt like a part of him had died. The only thing keeping him alive was Bella, and as he heard the blow dryer turn on, Edward dragged himself up to Bella's room to wait for her.
Bella hummed to herself as she finished up her routine in the shower. Her hair and skin smelled like freesias, and she had shaved all of the necessary areas. The prospect of spending an entire weekend alone with Edward was exciting, and Bella couldn't deny the fact that she was aching for some time alone with him. As she stepped out of the shower, she decided to dry her hair and tugged out her blow dryer as she thought about the things she had planned for this weekend. Her cheeks flushed from her thoughts and not from the heat of the blow dryer as she thought about the red bag that was tucked away in her closet. She hoped Edward would like what she had picked out.
She practically skipped to her room when she was finished bathing. Her robe was the only thing she was wearing, especially since there was no one else home, and Bella couldn't wait to see Edward. As she crossed through her room and over to her dresser, she let out a shriek before covering her mouth with her hand. When she felt like her heart was beating like normal again, Bella's hand dropped to her chest, holding the top of her robe closed, and slowly walked towards the rocking chair where Edward sat.
"Edward…" Bella said quietly. She noticed that he was looking down at his hands, and he didn't respond until Bella's hand was combing softly through his hair. Bella gasped when he looked up.
"She chose him, Bella…after everything…she still chooses him…"
Bella had to bite her lip to keep from gasping loudly as she took in the blank look on his face, and the large red welt on his cheek. The breath in her lungs whooshed out of her in surprise when Edward tugged her between his legs and he wrapped his arms around her waist, burying his face against her stomach.
"Edward, tell me what happened," Bella coaxed softly. She already had a good idea of what had happened, but she needed to hear it from Edward before she jumped to conclusions.
"He's using again…I knew he would…Bella, I can't stay another year until I graduate. I can't live with them," Edward said, lifting his head to look up at Bella.
Bella swallowed nervously when she saw the frantic look in Edward's eyes.
"We'll…we'll figure something out, Edward. It'll work this time."
Edward shook his head. "I can't stay, Bella. He'll find a way out of it, and I'm not sticking around to see my mother go down with him. Once I turn eighteen, I'm gone, Bella. I can't stay here another year."
Bella's eyes went wide. "But your birthday is in ten days!"
"I can't stay, Bella," Edward repeated.
"You're going to leave?" Bella whispered, her voice trembling. She didn't know what to think.
Edward stood up suddenly, cupping Bella's cheeks in his hands and lifting her face to look at his.
"Come with me, Bella. We'll do everything we talked about…we'll go down to Huntington Beach, I'll join the PSA…everything we talked about, baby."
"Edward…"
"Just come with me, baby…please. I don't have anyone else…come with me, Bella."
Bella's mind was racing with questions and she wasn't sure what to do. What she felt deep down though, was that Edward wasn't playing around. He was going to leave. She jumped slightly when Edward's forehead pressed against her own.
"Please, Bella…I need you…please…" Edward whispered.
A wet splash fell against Bella's cheek, and she gasped. She had never seen Edward cry, and she couldn't imagine what he must be feeling. Every time that Edward had taken a beating from his father, it had been to spare his mother, and now, to have his mother pick that monster over her son…Bella imagined that Edward must've been heartbroken.
"I have no one else…" Edward whimpered. "Please, Bella…please. I need you…I can't stay here…"
Edward's head dropped to Bella's shoulder and he pressed his face against Bella's neck. She couldn't tell what he was saying anymore, but she could feel his lips moving against her skin. She didn't know what else to do or say, so she just wrapped her arms around him, pressing kisses to his head.
"I'm here, Edward," Bella whispered.
Edward began to trail kisses up Bella's neck and he murmured, "Stay with me, Bella" over and over against her skin. Bella shivered as Edward's hands joined in, trailing up and down her sides slowly.
"I won't leave you," Bella whispered as Edward's lips pressed against the line of her jaw.
"I need you with me," Edward said, as he locked eyes with Bella. She could see that the frantic look was still there and she wasn't sure how else to comfort him and assure him that she was there for him.
"I'm here," Bella said softly, a small smile on her lips as her hands moved underneath Edward's shirt and began to pull it up slowly.
When his shirt got stuck on his arms, Edward took over and slipped his shirt off, dropping it on the floor next to him. As Bella worked on the buttons of his jeans, he toed off his shoes and socks, and his hands found purchase at Bella's hips. Bella didn't hesitate to pull Edward's jeans and boxers down in one swoop, and she didn't even blush at the sight of Edward's growing erection. This seemed to be the only way to comfort him right now, and it had at least broken Edward out of his shock. Once all of his clothes were gone, Edward seemed to come alive, but Bella still felt the frantic need in his movements and did her best to keep up with him.
Edward's hands were everywhere as they smoothed over Bella's skin and pushed her robe off her body. Bella gasped when Edward pulled her body flush with his and his lips found hers. Her arms wrapped around his neck and her fingers fisted his hair as Edward began to push them back towards Bella's bed.
"I need you," Edward whispered as he lay them down on Bella's small bed. "I need you, Bella…always…please…please…don't leave me…"
His lips were everywhere…her neck, her breasts, back up to her neck, her jaw, her lips…Bella was having a hard time trying to breathe and keep up with Edward. She wanted him, she always wanted him, but his panicked words and frenzied actions had her desperate to comfort him and calm him down. She gasped when his hips pressed against hers, and she parted her legs to cradle him between her thighs.
"I love you, Bella…I love you…stay with me…" Edward murmured against Bella's lips.
"Always," Bella panted. She couldn't help her body's reactions to Edward's. His movements and his caresses were perfect and even in this state, he knew just where to touch her to make her fall apart in his arms.
As Bella whispered, "I love you," Edward slid inside of her roughly with a strangled moan, and Bella gasped and wrapped her arms around Edward's shoulders. His thrusts were shallow and hard, and he buried his face against Bella's neck, panting and begging Bella to stay with him. Bella whimpered and gasped as Edward's pubic bone continually rubbed against her clit, and though she was worried about him, she was quickly losing herself in the physical feelings that were surrounding her. She cried out as Edward's hips sped up and she saw Edward's hand fist her flowery sheets as he nearly growled against her skin.
"Don't leave me…don't leave me…" Edward cried against Bella's neck repeatedly, his thrusts becoming erratic and frenzied.
"I won't! Never, Edward!" Bella cried out as her orgasm hit her, surprising her with its intensity, and she heard Edward groan loudly in her ear before a couple more frantic thrusts.
Bella felt Edward's entire body tense before he collapsed on top of her, breathing harshly in her ear, and she felt wetness on her shoulder. She wasn't sure if it was tears or sweat, and when she tried to move to see, Edward shook his head and held Bella tighter, wrapping his arms underneath her small body and holding her to him. Edward rolled so that they faced each other on their sides and Bella was able to bring her hands up to cup Edward's cheeks. When she pulled his face up so she could see his eyes, she saw that he was indeed crying and Bella quickly leaned forward and kissed away his tears.
"You'll come with me?" Edward asked, in a small broken voice. "You won't leave me?"
Bella kissed his lips softly and smoothed his hair away from his face. Looking at him, Bella knew that she couldn't possibly leave him or let him leave her. She was going to go with him wherever he went.
"I'll go with you, Edward. I'll never leave you. I promise."
Age 16, June 20th
Bella looked around her room one last time. The duffle full of her clothes and other bigger items were already over at Edward's little house by the river. Her books and other material items were going to stay here. She could always replace them, or come back from them someday…assuming that her parents ever forgave her. She really hoped they would, and hoped that they would understand somehow. The only material possessions Bella was taking with her were photos. She had some of her with her parents, and with Angela and Ben, and her favorites of her and Edward. Bella also wrote a letter to her parents, explaining that she ran away with Edward, that she was all that he had, apologizing for not telling them, and hoping that they could forgive her someday. She placed the pictures in her backpack, the letter on her bed, and tossed the sheet over her bed. Her parents would find the letter later. With one last look, making sure everything else in her room was covered with sheets, Bella headed downstairs.
The past few days had been stressful for Bella. She was constantly worried that something might happen to Edward, even if he was pretty much living in the boat house by the river. Bella was thankful that Ed Masen hadn't tried to press charges against Edward, but she was still worried that he would come after Edward in some other way. Especially since he was doing drugs and drinking again. She was also worried that her parents were going to figure out what she and Edward were planning, and that they would keep her from going with him. It was foolish, Bella knew this, especially since she was only sixteen, but she couldn't let Edward go. His parents had abandoned him, and she didn't want to see him turn back into the boy he had been when they had met.
Bella and Edward decided to leave on his birthday. While Edward was busy planning and getting in contact with his friend Sam, Bella made sure that she had an alibi for Edward's birthday and for a few days after. She didn't want to stress Edward out with helping her figure out an alibi, so she took care of it on her own.
Renee had wondered aloud one night at dinner, whether or not the walls of the interior of their house could use a new coat of paint or not. Charlie predictably grunted, "no", but Bella saw an opportunity and she took it, eagerly telling her mother that the dull white of the living room, and fading yellow in the kitchen could use some new life, not to mention the green in her bedroom and blue in her bathroom.
It had worked out more perfectly than Bella could have imagined. The work and painting was going to take a few days, and over the course of those days, they wouldn't be allowed to stay in the house due to the fumes from the paint. Renee made arrangements for them to stay at the inn, but Bella had asked to spend the couple of days with Angela instead. Not seeing a problem with it, Renee and Charlie had agreed.
Things worked out perfectly. The painters were coming in on the 21st and would finish up on the 24th. Bella and Edward would be long gone to California by then. One of the things Bella felt bad about was dragging Angela into all of this. Of course, Bella wasn't really going to be staying with Angela, and Angela was also not going to have a clue as to where Bella was really going. Bella tugged her strap of her backpack up her shoulder higher, and prayed that she would be able to hold her tears at bay as she heard the voices of her parents in the kitchen.
"Heading over to Angela's, kiddo?" Renee asked, wiping sweat from her brow as Charlie grumbled about moving the couch.
"Yup," Bella answered, figuring one-word answers were her best bet at this point.
"You two be safe," Charlie added, just like he always did when Bella was spending the night somewhere else.
"We will, Daddy," Bella said, her voice wavering a bit.
"You okay, Bells?" Charlie asked, looking up at her.
"Uh, yeah…just some dust or something," Bella mumbled.
"Are you riding your bike?" Renee asked, coming to stand next to Charlie, wrapping her arm around her husband's waist.
Bella simply nodded in response. She memorized the way her parents looked right at that moment. Her mother with her bright blue eyes and wide smile, her father with his mustache and dark brown eyes focused on her mother…they were so happy and so in love. She prayed that they would always be that way, especially after she was gone, and hopefully one day, she would see them like this again.
"Well, at least it's nice out today," Renee said. "Be safe, okay, Bella? Call us when you get there."
"I will."
"All right, love you, kiddo," Renee called as she turned and headed back towards the living room to finish getting it ready for the painters before they left that night for the inn.
"Love you, Bells," Charlie murmured before turning to follow Renee.
"I love you both," Bella said, loud enough for Renee to hear. She quickly turned and headed outside to her bike before he tears got the better of her. While she was sad that she was leaving her parents, she knew that she had to do this with Edward.
With a deep breath, she started off towards Edward's house. With each peddle of her foot, she gained more control of her emotions. She would see her parents again one day, and she would see Ed Masen rot in jail for what he did to his son and wife. She wasn't sure how she was going to make the latter one happen, but she vowed that she would.
Bella peddled up the drive to the Masen house and stopped short, hiding her bike in the trees near the side of the house. Taking out her cell phone, she made the quick call home to inform her parents that she was at Angela's. The tears threatened to fall again, but she quickly swiped them away as she began to walk towards Edward's retreat by the river. She was early, but she didn't think he would mind. As she passed the main house, she saw that no cars were there, so she assumed no one else was home, and she smiled when she saw someone walking around in the kitchen. Edward's car was already hidden down the road waiting for them, and Bella decided that Edward must be in the kitchen getting them food for the road. Deciding to surprise him, and possibly get a head start on their journey, Bella bounded up to the house and headed inside towards the kitchen.
"California, here we- -" Bella sang, but her words died quickly in her throat, and she dropped her backpack, stunned and suddenly afraid.
"California, huh? Is that where all his hard earned money is going?"
Bella's throat had gone dry and she felt her body begin to shake as Ed Masen took a swig from the beer bottle in his hand.
"I…I…" Bella stammered, and she was drowned out by Ed's sarcastic laugh.
"California, so he can leave behind his mother and his father? So that he can be happy again?"
Ed moved closer and Bella began to panic, realizing too late that Ed's advances had corralled her and forced her into a corner, now on the opposite side of the entrance to the kitchen.
"Why should he get to be happy?" Ed shouted, slamming his beer bottle on the counter and making Bella scream. She was beginning to panic and hoped that Edward was somewhere nearby.
"Oh…yes…I bet you're hoping that Edward will come save you aren't you? Oh, no, no, Bella…he's waiting for you at the boat house like the good little boy that he is."
Bella's eyes widened in shock and her mouth fell open. Ed knew about the boathouse?
"You two really didn't think I didn't know did you? Of course I know! You think I don't know what a waste of money that place is? That you and Edward don't go there to play house and fuck?"
Bella swallowed heavily to keep herself from throwing up. Had he seen…did he…she couldn't even think about it. She squeaked in terror when Ed was suddenly in her face, and the smell of alcohol on his breath didn't help her already nauseated stomach.
"Did you think I didn't know what you two had planned? How you wanted to catch me? Throw me in jail and take my Liz away from me?"
The panic was beginning to take over. Bella didn't know what to do, and every ounce of self-defense that her father had once taught her seemed to fly out of her head.
"Edward ruined my life. It seems only fair that I ruin his."
Bella gasped at his words, and turned to look him in the eye. The mention of Edward seemed to spark something inside of her.
"How can you say that? He's your son! You were happy once!"
Ed took another sloppy sip from his beer, practically spitting in Bella's face when he spoke next.
"He was just another mouth to feed! Something else that sucked up my hard earned money! He ruined everything by being born!"
"YOU ruined everything the moment you started doing drugs and drinking!" Bella shouted.
She didn't see it coming, and felt nothing but blinding pain on the left side of her face before she hit the floor. The tears welled in her eyes and she gasped in pain. Her ribs ached against the floor and the back of her head throbbed from where it had hit the cabinets behind her.
"ED!" Bella heard Elizabeth scream. "What the hell are you doing?"
Bella's head was spinning as she heard glass breaking and Elizabeth screaming. She heard a thud on the opposite side of the kitchen. Her head was pounded when she managed to crack her eyes open, and her hands flew to her mouth to stifle a scream. Elizabeth Masen was on the opposite side of the kitchen on the floor, her eyes closed and her body not moving. Bella's heart started to hammer wildly in her chest as she eyed the broken beer bottle in Ed's hand. With adrenaline pumping through her veins, Bella pushed herself to her feet and made a dash for the door.
"Oh no you don't!" Ed shouted behind her and Bella screamed as pain seared through her left side and she found herself pushed against the doorway. She screamed when she felt his hand wrap around the necklace with the jade heart pendant Edward had given her, and pull it from her neck. Bella started to panic as she felt something wet on her skin and Ed griped her arm roughly.
"You're not going to ruin this, you little brat! Edward is going to suffer!"
Bella knew she had to get away, and with the adrenaline she still had in her, she thrust her right leg out, kicking at Ed and nailing him right between the legs. He howled in pain, instantly letting go of Bella's arm. Once she was free, she kicked him in the ribs for good measure and staggered out towards the front door. She had to get away and call the police. Her side throbbed in more pain than she had ever experienced in her life and she quickly pat her pockets for her cell phone.
"Fuck!" Bella cried out, realizing her phone was in her orange backpack on the floor of the kitchen next to Ed. She quickly remembered her bike and stumbled her way outside.
She didn't know where Edward was, but she couldn't wait for him. She tried to scream his name as she ran for his bike, but the pain in her side was making it hard to breathe. Her hands trembled as she reached for her bike and she froze, noticing the deep red on her hands that was now also spreading across her shirt.
"Oh, God…" Bella cried. Her hands shakily went to her side and she nearly crumbled in pain when her torso twisted slightly. She realized Ed had cut her with the broken beer bottle.
Bella jumped when she heard the front door of the house bang against the wall. Picking up her bike and fighting back cries of pain, she started to peddle away down the drive. She would go towards town and hopefully someone she knew would pass by soon. As she peddled her thoughts were on Edward. Would Ed go after him now that she was gone? Would he hurt him? Would he kill him? Bella peddled faster once she reached the main road and turned towards town with a cry of pain. She could feel blood seeping down her left pant leg but she pushed herself to keep going. She had to…for Edward.
Her side ached and Bella felt her vision begin to go blurry and her head pound. The bike began to wobble and she veered off the side.
"No, no, no, no…" Bella cried, but it was too late. The bike tumbled to the side of the road, and the last thing Bella saw was a pair of headlights far in the distance. She prayed it wasn't Ed Masen as her world went dark.
Edward was pacing on the dock. The sun had disappeared behind the clouds, and Bella was thirty-five minutes late. He had spent all afternoon packing and making sure he had everything that they would need for their drive down to California. He had been in contact with his buddy Sam, and they were going to crash at his place for a while. Everything was perfect…except Bella still wasn't there. Edward huffed as he pulled out his cell phone and called her again. No answer. He pocketed his phone and pulled his grey jacket around him tighter. He certainly wasn't going to miss the weather in Forks.
With a heavy sigh, Edward decided to head up to the main house. Maybe Bella had thought they were meeting there for some reason? He certainly hoped that wasn't the case. He trekked his way through the woods, hoping that she would be there soon. They would make better time if they left at night. When Edward emerged from the woods, he was shocked to see his father in the front yard, limping his way back towards the house. Drunken bastard probably hurt himself, Edward thought. Edward approached cautiously as his father turned and looked at him. Edward's eyes narrowed when his father started to laugh.
"Looking for someone, boy?"
Edward's face paled, but he shook his head quickly, tightening his jaw.
"Where is she?" he growled. Ed just laughed and tossed his head back laughing.
"Where is she?" Edward shouted, pushing his father backwards. When Ed didn't answer, Edward glanced towards the open front door of the house. His heart started to hammer in his chest as he took off towards the door.
"Bella? Bella?" Edward cried frantically as he ran into the house. His head turned every, searching for her, and panicking when he didn't see her and she didn't answer him.
"Boy, she isn't here. She and her parents took off. Left Forks for a couple weeks. She didn't want to run away with you."
Edward froze and turned to face his father, trying to hide his surprise.
"Oh, of course I knew, boy. Bella told me the whole thing. How you wanted to run away, how you cried and tried to persuade her to go with you…pathetic is what she said."
"You're…you're lying," Edward stammered, suddenly unsure. Bella was already late meeting him. Could she have had a change of heart?
Ed shook his head. "Sorry, boy. You can see for yourself. Their house is empty."
Edward swallowed hard and didn't know what to say.
"Oh, and she said to give you this. She doesn't want it back either."
The breath in Edward's chest left in a whoosh and he felt like his heart was slowly breaking piece by piece. Hanging from his father's hand was the necklace he had given Bella…the jade heart pendant that represented his heart.
"No," Edward whispered, shaking his head. "You're lying."
"Here," Ed said, thrusting the necklace at Edward. "Go check her house yourself. The Swans are long gone, boy. And that Bella, she don't want you no more."
"No…no…you're lying!" Edward shouted. He shoved his way past his father, Bella's necklace in his fist as he started running down the drive to where his car was hidden.
If he hadn't been so frantic and checked more thoroughly, he would have seen his mother with Bella's backpack next to her on the other side of the kitchen counter where she lay pretending to be unconscious on the floor and out of the sight. Edward also would have also seen Elizabeth clutching Bella's cell phone to her chest, having pulled Bella's backpack towards her when she heard Edward's calls earlier.
Ed Masen chuckled lowly to himself as he walked slowly toward the doorway and watched Edward disappear down the drive. He wished he could get back at that little Swan bitch for kicking him in the balls, but he had a feeling this would work out so much better. He might not like his son, but he knew him well. Edward was angry, and when he was angry he made rash and irrational decisions.
Ed had done his homework. He knew all about Edward's boathouse hideaway. He knew all about the plans to run away to California. It wasn't hard to hire someone to follow his son and spy on him and Bella when you had money. Ed wanted to ruin his son's life, and he knew the way to do that was through Bella. The plan to run away was almost too perfect, and Bella arriving early that day worked in Ed's favor. Her getting away hadn't been a part of the plan, but with that cut in her side, she wasn't going to get far. While she was indisposed somewhere on the side of the road, Edward would drive in a blind rage to Bella's house to see if his father's words were correct. When he arrived and found an empty house, he would act without thinking, and leave Forks behind, effectively losing the only other person who had ever cared about him.
Ed leaned against the doorframe with a wide smile on his chest. He never wanted a child, but Liz had begged him so damn much for one. A child was just another mouth to feed, something else that he had to provide for, something else that took Liz's time away from him…essentially, it was the thing that ruined his life.
Now, his son's life was ruined, and Ed had never felt more satisfied.
Well? Yes? No? Let's keep in mind, Ed Sr. has been doing drugs for years, so his thinking and ideas are not supposed to exactly make sense in comparison to the past Ed that Edward remembers growing up. I know…lots of heartfail going on, and next chapter there will be more. How will Bella and Edward react to the things they learn once they've heard both sides of the story? O_o
Thank you for sticking with me. Just hold on tight. One more chapter of angst, and then we'll see where we all go from there. Maybe we'll even find out just who gave Bella all those grandbabies soon…well, maybe not, but we can only move forward from this once the truth is out right? Let me know what you thought, good or bad, pretty please? And make sure you check out the blog!
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Hope to have an update for you all soon! Check the blog and twitter for updates!