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Chapter Seven

Basic Desires

7:45 pm Earth Standard Time: SR-2 Normandy.

Shepard usually enjoyed the quiet vigil inside of her private quarters, but tonight the stillness made her feel more unease than usual. As she was searching through her wardrobe, her mind was swimming with a mix thoughts about the uncertainty of the assignment. It had been a while since she had been afraid of something. She had skirted death many times throughout her life, to the point that her instinctive fears were heavily dampened. However, tonight changed all that, because this time she was fearful of herself.

A few hours ago, she did her homework for this assignment by investigating the local area with Samara, looking for clues about her daughter's whereabouts. As they went through the inventory from one of the victims' bedrooms, Samara started to reflect about the genetic condition that her daughter acquired and the dangers behind it.

"Her scent evokes emotions long hidden. Her eyes promise you things you were always scared to ask of another..."

Shepard rubbed her temples, trying to focus her search, but her mind started to question her own hidden emotions. It was bad enough that she was already suppressing them from herself, having a serial killer breaking into her thoughts made her feel unnerved, especially when the killer in the question had a strange genetic condition, where she would bring harm to someone within the heat of intimate passion. Shepard admitted that she was far from being prudish, since she had been with plenty of men during her early years in the Alliance military. However, those encounters were all based on a mutual friendship where agreements made about personal boundaries. While she felt quite comfortable about getting 'close' to her old comrades, having someone stepping beyond her personal barrier to her seemed all too sudden, especially an asari who would use that particular secret against her.

She felt her heart beating faster at the mere thought of exposing her emotional weakness to someone. Shepard started to reach towards her chest, trying to grasp her rose ring talisman for comfort. However, she then quickly realised that she didn't have it anymore. She already gave it to Garrus two years ago, when they were parting ways after the Battle of the Citadel. Shepard gave out a small chuckle at her sentimental feelings for him. At the time, while she was still wary with the turian race, she was starting grow fond of him, to the point she was more than happy to give her 'lucky charm' away just to keep him safe. Then she frowned a little when she remembered the sudden silence between them recently.

After Garrus' confrontation with Sidonis, he started to spend a lot of time in the Main Battery, only coming out occasionally to get something. Whenever Shepard tried to talk to him, he quietly murmured to her "busy with the calibrations", before politely sending her away. She was unsure whether he was angry with her or not. Two years ago, despite the difficulty in reading turian expressions, Shepard managed to pick up subtle movements and emotions from him until he was an open book for her, while Garrus' straightforward outlook helped. Then the time he spent on Omega had changed him. He became more cynical and introverted to the point where Shepard no longer understood who he was While she could still see tiny glimpses of the old Garrus she used to know, nowadays they were like strangers, with Garrus keeping most of his feelings to himself. The heated debate between them during their search for Sidonis, was a case-in-point example how much space and distance had grown between them.

The holographic clock on her table announced the time, which shook her from her musing. She gave out a gentle sigh at her predicament, before she continued to rummage through her wardrobe until she found the outfit and the accessories she was looking for. It was the little black dress that Kasumi had brought for her once, to use as a disguise during their heist, another assignment that she'd had to help out her crew. She picked the dress up and glanced over with a wary look. This is the first assignment she was going to go into without a gun or a biotic amp.

Shepard rubbed the back of her skull, where the sockets of her implants were located. It felt strange not to have a biotic amp connected to her and she felt vulnerable without it, the biotic abilities were like a third arm for her.

Once she finished putting her dress and other accessories on, Shepard then slowly walked towards the giant fish tank and gingerly place her hand onto the glass plane. While she observed the fishes, she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the glass. To her dismay, she saw the colonist girl within her eyes. It has been a while since the child of Mindoir showed up in her reflection. She could feel the adrenaline rush into her body, as she knew why the child appeared before her.

She was warning her of the upcoming dangers for tonight, like a bad omen for the both of them. Not just any danger either, it one of those moments that will affect her for the rest of her life. Last time the kid showed up was during her final mission with the SSV Kapyong, which resulted her being reassigned to the Normandy, sealing her fate. Still whatever happened, she was going to carry on Samara's wishes, but this time she would be more vigilant than usual.


The aftermath of Sidonis' confrontation left Garrus with more questions than answers. As he continued to calculate the algorithm of the weapon system in the Main Battery, his mind began to ponder his confusion, this time about his personal feelings. Ever since he reluctantly admitted his love for Shepard, nothing had been the same. The nightmares he had been dealing with for the past couple of weeks were gone, but now instead of seeing his dead team-mates, he began to dream about her every night. While they were pleasant in the moment, as soon he woke up, the guilt settled in quickly. Especially on some nights when he saw her in his dreams, smiling pleasantly as she approached him, swaying her hips in a sensual manner. He quickly started to berate himself.

This was why he had been avoiding her for a while now. Whenever he looked upon her, he could feel his heart beating faster, as he could feel his own emotions started to pine over her. As much as he wanted her, he was forced to remind himself that she was a human. There was no way that Shepard would accept this. If a human male couldn't get near her, then how on Palaven could he get closer? He remembered two years ago, Shepard had to gently turn Kaidan down, after he was discussing his interest with her. He knew that Kaidan was a good man. Garrus was hoping that Shepard might warm up to Kaidan, since it might give her some peace. Instead, she turned him away gently, citing that she no longer had any desire when it came to romance.

Besides, Shepard was the only friend he had left in this screwed up galaxy. He didn't want to cause unwanted tension, or worse a schism between them, due to his own selfish desires. While he could feel the painful ache in his chest as he suppressed his yearning, he was willing to bear it, as long he could continue to stand at her side as long as he could.

Garrus started to feel dizzy and bothered, after he reflected on his feelings further than he wanted. He wiped the sweat from his forehead and quickly walked out of the Main Battery. He needed a cold shower, just to wake himself up to reality.

He was about to reach towards the bathroom door when all of a sudden, he bumped into something out of nowhere. He felt startled from running into an invisible object, it didn't help that the obstacle yelped and quickly materialised in front of him. It took Garrus a few seconds to recognise that the obstruction he bumped into was Kasumi, shrouding herself with a cloaking device. Garrus crossed his arms and gave her a suspicious look.

"Kasumi, why are you cloaking on the Normandy? I hope you're not stealing anything."

"No, no. Just hiding from a guy named Burt. This security guy on this ship, who seems to... enjoy staring at me."

"Who wouldn't, if you're known to be the best thief in the galaxy?"

"It's not like that!" Kasumi protested. She continued, "It's just that normally people would look at my eyes or hands, but Burt seems to look at... you get the picture."

"Is that so?"

"No need to get jumpy, Garrus. If you're worried about your personal logbook, fear not. It's still safe and secured as we speak."

Garrus gave Kasumi a startled look, "You what? How in the spirits' name did you find out that I've kept a logbook? Did you just hack into my terminal?"

"No, I been helping fixing up the issues inside weaponry system," Kasumi gave him a cheeky grin. She continued, "I noticed an error in your calibrations, so I decided to fix it up for you and that's when I saw your logbook left open..."

He then placed his hand onto his forehead and gave out a tiny embarrassed groan. If that human saying 'something hits the ceiling fan' described something, this would be a perfect situation. Most of the recent entries in his logbook were musings about his affections for Shepard. If Kasumi did see those entries, then...

"I think you should go for her," Kasumi added.

"Wait, what?" Garrus asked while giving her a bewildered look.

"You know, ask her out, take her to somewhere romantic..."

"Now, just hold on a minute Kasumi! Have you realised that we're not that compatible?"

"Sure you are. Both of you enjoy sniping mercs on ledges, beating up people for the right cause, throwing snide comments at every single opportunity..."

"But I'm a turian and she's human," Garrus quickly countered.

Kasumi shrugged her shoulders. "Nothing wrong with that. I saw one asari and hanar couple before, so what's wrong with a turian dating a human?"

"Everything! A mere scratch from my claw could have landed her in the emergency room, there's no way we could be together romantically, since our bodies work... differently. And I haven't even started about the political and social tension between humanity and us turians."

"Have you forgotten that we're on a suicide mission?"

"No I haven't... look, this is why we shouldn't talk about this out in the open. Especially when the mission is at stake."

"Emphasis on the word 'suicide', Garrus," Kasumi replied as she waved around the air quotation gestures briefly. She relaxed her hand and continued, "Since we're all going to be kicking the bucket soon, you might as well make the most of it. If you want I could help, like giving you suggestions on how to sway her into your arms..."

"Do you really need to say that out loud? What if Shepard is around nearby?"

"Don't worry, she's already out on an assignment at the moment."

Then Garrus' eyes began to dull, as his face plate shifted into a frown. While they were not on speaking terms for a while, Shepard always stopped by at the Main Battery and notified him first, whenever she was going ashore to do her assignments. However, tonight she didn't bother to tell him that she was leaving, which made him feel both troubled and depressed.

"Something wrong?" Kasumi asked.

"Shepard left the ship, without telling me first... Is she mad at me?"

"No, what makes you think she's mad?"

"Because I pissed her off? I don't know, we haven't been talking since we left the Citadel. Even then, she always told me first when she was about to go planetside without... until now."

Kasumi tapped him lightly on the back to comfort him, "I don't think that's the case. Maybe she forgot to tell you first or something."

"But she doesn't forget things... like this," Garrus mumbled while looking down dejected.

"It will be fine, don't worry. As soon she comes back to the ship, both you and Shepard will have a nice cheerful chat."

"Well, maybe you're right. I hope so."


8:30 pm Earth Standard Time: The Afterlife VIP section, Omega.

Shepard made a slight twitch with her nose as soon she stepped into the VIP venue. She was expecting that the VIP section would be more refined than the regular venue. Instead, it was almost identical to the basement level, except the area is well lit and the stench of questionable bodily fluids were stronger. She should have expected this place, this is not Illium. Refinery and elegance don't exist on Omega. She felt out of place wearing her designer dress, especially in a club like this, but she wasn't going to worry about appearances for now. There was still the asari to be dealt with. Shepard began to search around the venue.

No luck. Despite the bright flashing florescent lights that penetrated most of the area, she couldn't find her. Shepard rubbed the back of her neck. The loud club music didn't help to ease the tension, as she could feel her head spinning. She needed a drink.

While she was heading towards the bar, somewhere within the density of the bass, she could hear a girl snarling loudly. Shepard turned at the direction of the source and saw an asari dancer, trying to shrug off a turian patron, who seemed to be very persistent about spending the night with her. She decided to approach them, starting to show some concern for the dancer. As she was getting closer, she could hear the heated dispute clearer.

"Don't be like that, I've got creds. We could go back to my place. I got simple taste," the turian replied in a suggestive tone.

In a fit of outrage, the dancer yelled. "Back off, asshole! I'm a dancer, not a hooker!"

There was low intimidating snarl coming from him, as his eyes brightened as if by some sort of heated catalyst. The turian bared his teeth and marched closer to her aggressively. The dancer held both of hands up, getting ready to shield herself, as she was expecting him to strike a blow on her. However, instead the turian grinned menacingly at her, seeming to be impressed by her stubborn zest.

"You got a mouth on you... I'm going to enjoy watching you using it."

Shepard was watching the scene at a distance the whole time, her eyes narrowed as she glared angrily at the offending turian. She cleared her throat and decided to step in, threatening him in a low icy voice.

"The lady is asking you to step away."

The turian quickly turned, facing towards Shepard. At first his face was twisted with anger, but after he finished studying her, the tension on his facial features loosened as he started to leer at her. If her interpretation of turian expression and body language was correct, that deviant was showing his lust for her, much to Shepard's surprise and disgust . She gripped her fist tightly.

"You want in on this transaction?" the turian asked as he approach her slowly. He continued, "I don't care if it's you or this bitch. I just want good times."

Before he got the chance to touch her inappropriately, Shepard quickly swiped his hand away and elbowed him in the chest. The turian growled at her, before attempting to reach over her, trying to assert his dominance over her. However, he was no match for her swift flexibility as she quickly dodged his grasp, punched him in the kidney, before throwing him to the other side of the room. While he was grovelling in pain, Shepard gently brushed her hands together and gave him a victorious smirk.

"Good times are over!" Shepard yelled over the loud music.

The dancer approached her, "Thanks. Security was asleep."

Then she lightly tapped Shepard on her backside and winked, before leaving the venue.

Shepard made a small embarrassed chuckle to herself, while pulling her hair back. After all of this fighting, she really needed a good drink, a drink with an abrasive element to it. She was about to continue to head towards the bar, when another asari approached her. She began to observe the asari, there was something about her that stood out from the rest of the crowd. Her piercing ice blue eyes reminded Shepard of someone...

"Hi, my name is Morinth. So what's your name?"

Morinth. The hair strands on the back of her neck stood stiff as soon she heard that familiar name. That was the name of Samara's daughter, the asari she was looking for. She was about to quickly introduce herself when she remembered Samara's warning. Morinth was a devious but paranoid person, who could quickly figure out the deception, as soon she noticed the act. Hence she had to remind herself to act smooth and keep her cool.

"Some of my friends called me Sandra, but most people call me a bitch. I tend to attract trouble without lifting a finger," Shepard lied.

"Like that turian you dealt with before?"

"Well yeah. You could say that."

Morinth gave out a small chuckle, "I've been watching you for a while now. You're the most interesting person in this place. Why don't you come and sit with me at my table, instead?"

Shepard nodded and followed her back to the table.


9:56 pm Earth Standard Time, SR-2 Normandy.

Garrus paced around inside the elevator nervously, waiting to reach its destination. He knew Shepard was a strong woman, who could handle herself in most situations without his assistance. However, for some reason he couldn't get rid of that strange nagging feeling. The more he thought about Shepard's lack of warning, the more he saw something that was not quite right. The last time he saw her, when he was sharing the elevator with her a few hours ago. At the time, he was bringing a few weaponry mods to the armoury room, while she was heading towards her own private quarters. As he was stealing awkward glances at her, he noticed that she seemed more anxious than usual. She was holding her hands behind her back, biting her bottom lip while looking away from him

It troubled him. She wasn't the type who liked to keep quiet about the state of the mission, especially to her crew. And more so for him, since she used to confide in him about her personal opinions, even sensitive ones that could affect the morality of the crew until recently. Garrus wondered if the silent treatment was a retaliation for pushing her away from him? He shook his head, Shepard was thuggish at times but not petty. She wouldn't pull a stunt on him like that, just because he refused to talk to her. Still, he started to wish that he could come along with her, instead of hiding inside the Main Battery like a coward. He tried to reassure himself that Samara was with her, watching her back. While Garrus saw her skills as a biotic first hand back on Illium, where they were powerful enough that he wouldn't want to mess with her on a bad day, he was still worried about Shepard.

He was making a prayer to the Spirits, appealing to them to help Samara to keep her safe, when the door opened in front him. He reach the CIC level, where the armoury was located. When he stepped out of the elevator, Kelly quickly approached him. Garrus gritted his teeth, since he had run out of creative excuses to brush her off gently. He was expecting her to ask him for a quick chat session, but instead she started to question him with a concerned look.

"Garrus, I know you're worried about Shepard, but please, be assured that she's in good hands..."

"Right, because turian talons ain't good enough to protect her."

Kelly started to stutter, but Garrus gave her a tiny sardonic smile, "Relax, I'm only messing around a little. No need to get worked up."

"Oh... I see. I thought you were going to... never mind. I should get back to my work."

He raised his plated eyebrow, while he gave her a sceptical look. He noticed her reaction was abnormal, especially if it had to do with Shepard's current assignment. Garrus was about to pursue this matter further, but Kelly quickly grabbed her portable terminal and rushed towards the elevator, closing the door behind him. He shook his head and continued to make his way towards the armoury room.

Then the door to the Armoury Room opened in front of him. He saw Jacob who was pre-occupied with his task, cataloguing the weaponry inventory. As Garrus was approaching towards one of the surface counters where the sniper rifles were laid in an orderly manner, Jacob quickly turned towards him with a puzzled look on his face.

"Garrus, what are you doing here? I thought you were busy fixing the ship's cannon."

"I'm done for now. I'm kind of feeling tired from looking at the screen all day, so I wanted to do some modding on my gun, as a change of pace." Garrus replied.

"Fair enough. I hope those mods that you've brought in actually blows up someone else's face, not ours."

"Don't worry, I know what I'm doing when it comes to rifles."

Garrus cracked his knuckles and was about to pick up his own gun, when he saw a familiar sniper rifle that was laid next to his. He picked it up and took a closer look, then all of a sudden, the dread crept into his mind when he realised it belonged to Shepard.

It was her favourite rifle and she always refused to part with the weapon, whenever she was on a mission. Garrus checked the gun carefully, hoping he was mistaken. Unfortunately, he wasn't. The same knife scratching she added to differentiate her weapon from the others and the recent mods he secretly added on as a surprise; all pointed out to him clearly that this was her rifle. He started to check with the rest of the inventory, hoping she just made a switch, or at least she brought some back up. However, after thoroughly looking through the list, there was no indication that she took any of the weapons from the armoury.

And she was on an assignment.

Garrus shook his head. This was absurd. Shepard knew better than to walk out of the ship unarmed, especially when dealing with assignments. He knew that she always kept some sort of weapon nearby her, even on diplomatic visits. Speaking of missions, he was pretty sure the mission that Shepard is currently dealing with was not a nice diplomatic discussion, judging by the way most of the crew seemed hushed up about it. Especially with him.

There was something not quite right about this mission. The whole crew looking nervous. The silent barrier that barred him from getting more answers about her whereabouts and the lack of guns at her side.

This was all his fault. He should have stayed at her side and watched over her properly. Two years ago, he didn't stay at her side, which resulted her untimely death and now he was about to repeat the same mistake again. Except this time, it was not too late for him to rectify that. He quickly equipped his guns, grabbed her sniper rifle and rushed out of the armoury room; ignoring Jacob calling him out for taking the equipment without anyone's consent.

Orders be damned. Especially when Shepard's life was in grave danger.


10:25 pm Earth Standard Time: Morinth's apartment.

"See that blade over there? I used to be into duelling for a while. Imagine the look in your opponent's eyes, as you're about to win and he knows it." Morinth elegantly grinned, as she showed her sword to Shepard.

While Morinth turned her back, Shepard made a quick suspicious glance at her, before observing the blade closely. From the look of the designs, it was made by an asari artisan sword maker, with the elaborate pattens and the light delicate feel to its weight. She lightly touched the blade and almost yelped quietly when she accidentally made a minor cut to her thumb. It was sharper than she expected, which reminded her about the dangers of underestimating the whole asari race. They had a deadly streak beneath their pacifist appearance.

Morinth sat at her couch and started to beckon her over. Shepard sat gingerly next to her, keeping her combative alertness intact.

"I love clubs. People, movement, heat. I can still hear the bass, like the drums of a great hunt, out for your blood." Morinth mused.

For a serial killer who seemed to lack empathy, she was quite poetic, in a morbid kind of way. Shepard began to understand why her former 'lovers' were easily swayed into Morinth's manipulation. Shepard continued to listen to her, keeping cautious instinct in check.

Morinth continued, "But here, it's muted.. and you're safe. Is that what you want?"

"People feel safest when they die," Shepard replied.

"It's true, we're never safe. I've never understood the fascination with safety. Some of us choose differently."

And Shepard never ever understood people who liked to run into harm's way, like her. She only did it because it was her duty to keep other people safe. Morinth, on the other hand, seemed to have a deep fascination with death, to the point that it became a strange fetish to her.

Then Morinth got off her seat and started to approach Shepard slowly. "We share independence over submission, you and I."

Shepard could feel her muscles tense as Morinth placed herself on Shepard's lap. She gritted her teeth while the asari softly stoked her cheeks, before lifting her chin up to meet Morinth's eyes.

"We both killed many times... but that's where the similarities end," Shepard countered, while maintaining her usual stoic calmness.

Morinth gave her a suspicious look, "What do you know? Let's stop playing games."

Shepard was about to cast a stasis effect on her, when she realised her biotic energy seem to been weaken, due to the lack of biotic amps connected to her. Then to her horror, Morinth began to smile sinisterly at her. The warmth within Shepard's amber eyes were penetrated by the asari's unflinching icy gaze. Morinth started to intertwine her arms around Shepard's body, her eyes became dark as a black void and she started to whisper seductively to Shepard.

"Look into my eyes..."


Shepard wrapped her arms around herself tightly. She was shivering from the strange cold air, while shielding her body that was now stripped and exposed. She looked around, trying to figure out how to break herself from Morinth's spell. However, the surroundings around her were pitch black, like her current state of mind. Blind, cold, naked and vulnerable. Her worst nightmare.

As she tried to tell herself to remain calm, to her despair, she felt someone reaching out towards her. Their touch wasn't exactly soothing, as she could feel the rough abrasive texture of their skin that were rubbing against her. She tried to fight it off its grasp violently, with her biotics, fists, teeth and anything. However, her efforts were in vain, as the strange figure managed to overpower her. She closed her eyes and braced herself as she was expecting the worst.

Then with an unexpected twist, the mysterious figure started to caress her gently in its arm, tenderly stroking her hair, while shielding her from harsh cold air with its warmth. It felt strange to her that the figure's embrace was soothing and safe, to the point she couldn't feel the adrenaline rush in her body. She looked up, trying to identify it. To her shock, the enigmatic stranger turns out to be someone she knew well and least expected to meet at this moment.

She was about to tell him to let go of her, while protesting how inappropriate it was for the both of them. However, she couldn't bring herself to do it after she looked into his eyes. She could see a mixture of sadness and longing as he looked upon her. He nuzzled at her forehead affectionately, while pulling her closer to him. At first, her body began to stiffen instinctively as she felt nervous about sharing the intimacy between them. Then her own desires began to override her, she pressed her head against his chest and smiled gently.

What was the point of fighting for survival, if she could not find a reason to fight for? Interspecies fears and public image could all go straight to hell. She wanted to fight for the both of them and to be at his side till the end.

Shepard reached out to touch his scarred face and with a deep yearning, she whispered, "Garrus..."


The muddled dark haze was lifted from her perception as the surroundings became clearer once more. She twitched an eyebrow and watched as Morinth tried to hypnotise her. The eyes were still black from her attempt to embrace Shepard 'eternally'.

"... tell me you want me. Tell me you'd kill for me. Anything I want."

Shepard rolled her eyes and retorted, "Don't count on it."

"But you... who are you?" Morinth shuttered as she glared at Shepard. She continued, "Oh no... I see what's going on. The bitch herself found a little helper."

Before Morinth got the chance to harm Shepard, Samara quickly strode into the apartment, her body shrouded with dark matter particles. She lifted Morinth up from the couch with her biotics, before pinning her to the window.

As the mother and the daughter started to engage in a heated fight, Shepard held her right fist tightly. She took a deep breath. This was going to get ugly.


11:15 pm Earth Standard Time: SR-2 Normandy.

"Relax, take a deep breath and put those guns away." Kelly tried to reassure Garrus with a gentle tone.

"No," he countered.

The whole crew were gathering around him at the bridge area, as they blocked him off from the exit doorway of the ship, much to his displeasure. It had been over two hours, Shepard hadn't returned yet and the whole crew had the nerve to sit back and not worrying about her wellbeing. Garrus gave all of them a death glare.

"Officer Vakarian, if you're not going fall back in line, I will use the necessary force to make you... and you don't want me to do that." Miranda threatened him in her usual icy tone.

"I want you to try, Ms. Lawson." Garrus replied with a snide remark.

He gently sheathed Shepard's rifle on his back, before he started to crack his knuckles. Miranda gave him an absurd look, as she started to stand in a defensive position, the biotic effects began to flow around her body. Most of the crew were seem to be apprehensive with the situation, only Jack and Grunt were enjoying the events are unfolding in front of them, especially Jack who seemed to have an 'issue' with her.

However, the fight ended as quickly as it they began, when they heard a familiar authoritative tone yelling over the crowd.

"Everyone, stand down!"

The crew quickly stepped aside, as Shepard was walking through the entrance with Samara walking beside her. Garrus' eyes were widened when he looked at her.

He had heard a few accounts from the crew, when they remarked about seeing her in a dress. However, he would never have imagined in his life-time he would see her wearing one, until now. Despite the lack of physical attraction to humans, he admitted the Shepard looked beautiful in that dress, enhancing all her delicate features. He began to see why so many male humans were attracted to her in the first place.

However, his admiration came to a sudden end when he remembered the current situation he got himself into. Shepard closed her eyes and bowed her head down, before pinching the bridge of her nose in exasperation.

"Kelly, would you take Samara back to the Observation room? She's been through enough. Everyone, get back to your stations, show's over. And Garrus..."

"Uh... Yes Commander?" Garrus replied.

"Come with me to my office. We need to discuss about your insubordination."

"But..."

"Now! Not the next morning or 5 minutes later. We need to talk right now," Shepard ordered in a louder tone.

Garrus then reluctantly followed behind her, while Shepard quickly walked towards the elevator, her hands are curling into a tight fist.

Something was bound to hit the ceiling fan tonight.