Sari stood in the middle of a field, waiting.
And getting pretty bored from that.
If only they were normal. Sari mused. She'd have imaginary friends, Miko would be dating some boy back in Japan, she would be playing with people her own age and species, and Miko would understand wanting to see a Cybertronian brawl was something no ordinary girl enjoyed. Instead, we both would be doing our hair, painting our nails, and gossiping over cute boys.
But instead, we were extraordinarily, out of this world, absolutely NOT normal.
So here she was, standing out in the middle of an open field being Decepticon bait. Oh the joy. A week ago Sari had told Miko about the All Spark Key, and now she was regretting it. With Miko's understanding of the Key's power to draw any Decepticon in, Miko had planned a grand scheme, putting little Sari Sumdac in as 'con bait. Once more, oh the joy. So now she had to wait, just wait, until any and/or all Decepticons came. Miko was off somewhere, hopefully somewhere nearby, doing something.
And in most cases you did not want to know what.
This was probably that case.
Sari looked up again for the thousandth time, hoping for something to happen. And this time, it did.
"Well, well, well. What do we have here?" A voice cackled, and Sari turned stunned to see a huge Decepticon towering over her. "And what is it that I feel? Mm, something delicious I do believe. Something quite, quite powerful." The Decepticon circled the red head slowly, just loving seeing the girl squirm. "Do you want to hand it over? Or do we did to have a discussion?"
"Let-Let's talk." Sari stuttered out. "Where's my friends? I know you took them!"
"The Autobots have finally been captured? Wow, I was actually doubting Starscream. That fool couldn't have caught a single thing, are you sure human? The Autobots were captured, by Starscream?"
"Someone took him, and only you Decepticons have enough power to catch my friends. And only you Dcepticons have a spaceship anyway." Sari explained.
"Hm, true, true." The Decepticon allowed, standing still and looking down at the human with something close to a smile on its face.
"Where are they?" Sari demanded.
"Me? How would I know?" The 'con asked surprised.
"But you-you're a Decepticon! You have to know!" Sari asked desperately.
"Kid, being in the Decepticon ranks doesn't mean you're privy to all knowledge. But bringing in you, and that All Spark Key, should put me in the loop now." The 'con reached down to pick up the shocked Earthling, and then froze, winced, then screamed. Sari shrieked as the Decepticon pitched forward and squeezed her eyes shut as they two slammed into the ground.
"So Sari, guess what I have!" Miko's voice rang out. Sari shoved her way out of the Decepticon's grip and came to watch Miko standing heroically on the 'con's back. In her hand was a wicked AK-47, something much bigger and much harsher than a traditional tazor, and as Sari watched shocked Miko was setting up a net to keep their guest tied up. "So do you think those 'cons will be mad we just 'con napped a Decepticon?" She asked grinning.
"This was your plan?" Sari wanted to groan. So they 'con napped a Decepticon, big whoop. Sari had seen many Decepticons get abandoned in a fight, this would be the same. "Really?"
"Of course not, ye of little faith." Miko admonished grinning. "This was phase uno. Now onto phase B!"
"Oh help us." Sari groaned again. Miko pressed a button on one of her weapons, where did she find those things anyway? Sari wondered flabbergasted, and then the Decepticon screamed in pain.
"Wonderful circuits, they work with tazors too. Now 'con, you're going to tell me what I want to know, got that?" Miko demanded, her voice icy and a glare made to silence Megatron himself.
"I won't tell you squat." The 'con bit out.
"Aw, to bad. That wasn't what I wanted to hear." Miko said patiently, then pressed a button and smiled as the 'con screamed. "Want to try again?" Miko asked pleasantly, hopping off the creature's back and walking to stand in front of it.
"Bite me." The 'con retorted. Miko smiled, pressed a button, waited for the 'con to stop screaming, then asked again. "OK, OK!" It ground out.
"Thanks so much for your cooperation." Miko smiled with false sincerity. "Now, are the Autobots on board a Decepticon warship?"
"I don't know!" The 'con screamed.
"Oops! My finger slipped. Care to try again?"
"I don't know!" The Decepticon repeated.
"You don't know at all, or I don't know which ship?"
"At all!" Again, a scream. "I'm going to kill you human! I'll crush your bones and hear you scream in pain!"
"Aw, it's a nice picture, but no thanks. Now, once more, with feeling."
"There's a rumor." The 'con muttered. "A new Decepticon project, they were supposed to be able to catch a Autobot." The 'con rushed everything out, and the two girls breathed a sigh of relief.
"Not a Autobot, all Autobots." Sari told it with a clenched fist.
"Now we're getting somewhere." Miko smiled.
"Let me go! I'll crush you! I'll bury you alive! I won't help you!" The Decepticon roared.
"Whoever said we needed your help? I'm the one with the power here, and it feels good too." Miko said, a scary smile creeping on her face. "You see, I don't like people who lie to me. And I especially don't like people who kidnap my friends."
"I didn't!" The 'con panicked.
"But your side did. You see each Centennial being chooses which side they're on. Good, or Bad. You my not so fine so not friend, you chose to be a Decepticon, which means you chose the dark side. So your team kidnapped my friends, or well, bot napped them, and you are a member, maybe not the most essential member, of the opposing team. Your team has my friends, and if you make me mad you will never make it back to your pathetic little base. Have you ever seen a Decepticon massacred? You start with the plates, you just rip them out, slash out the circuits within, you open up the spark chamber and then rip out an optic. With one pitiful optic left you watch as your spark is cut out and then are fed into a grinder. One optic left means you watch as your frail little body gets eaten up and then your gone. Now, this doesn't have to happen. I just want one little favor, and we will all go on our merry way never to meet again. Doesn't that sound nice? I think it does, oh Sari, do you think I'm scaring him?" Miko looked at the 'con with a sick smile, and then at Sari who was paler than ever. "So, do we all want to go on our merry way? 'Cause I would love that, but first I just need your cooperation. So my little Decepticon, what do you say?" Miko looked at him with eyes as dark as black holes, and a smirk the size of Texas. "Well?" Miko repeated growing impatient. "Do we need some more shock therapy sessions?"
"No!" He exclaimed.
"Aw, he found his voice! Isn't that great Sari!"
"Uh, sure."
"So, my steel covered friend, what do you say? A trip to the morgue? Or just help two little earthlings out?"
"I'll help, I'll help!"
"That's so sweet! So, here's what we're going to do." Sari didn't listen as Miko outlined her plan. They had 'con napped a Decepticon. They were going to get in so much trouble. But then again, she kinda knew this was going to happen. 'Cause really, they just weren't normal.