Big Doors

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, it's not mine. This is an AU story.

Chapter Ten: The Doctor Departs

"Doctor -"

"Kate, Tasha, Kate."

"Kate. You wanted to see me?"

"Yes, there's something I needed to talk to you about. The captain's going to tell everyone later, but I thought you should hear it first."

"Why do I get the feeling I'm not going to like this?"

"You're probably not. I'm transferring back to the Repulse."

"What? Why?"

"Your old chief medical officer -"

"Beverly? What's she got to do with this?"

"I'd tell you if you'd let me finish. She's requested a transfer back into starship medicine, and in light of her former assignment, coupled with her son's position, Starfleet has decided to give her back her former post and send me back to mine."

"That's not fair! They can't do that!"

"I didn't realize you had problems with Dr. Crusher."

"I don't. Beverly and I are friends. What I have a problem with is you leaving."

"Tasha, just because we're not on the same ship doesn't mean we can't continue our friendship."

"That's what you said last time. You never called me at the youth center, not once, and niether did any of the other friends I'd made."

"You mean they never told you?"

"Told me what?"

"A week after I left, I called the center and asked to speak to you. My request was denied. They wouldn't even tell me how you were doing."

"What? Why?"

"They said, and I quote, 'The young people here come from lives best left behind. We prefer to sever all contact with persons from their past in order to facilitate their moving forward.' I tried again several times, and I even tried coming in person, with the same result. I'm assuming the same thing happened to anyone else who tried to contact you."

"The first few weeks I was there, I kept imagining you'd call me, or visit me, or something, and I could tell you how much I hated it there, how horrible it was, and you'd take me away somehow, just like you took me away from Turkana. And when I never heard from you, I thought you'd forgotten about me, that I'd been just another day's work to you."

"My God, no, never." Blinking back tears, Kate enfolded Tasha in a tight embrace. "What did they do to you there? Tell me now. I may not be able to do anything, but I can listen."

"The home was designed for kids like me who needed extra help to get used to the way society worked. Most of them were like me, victims of circumstance, but we were treated like criminals, like it was our fault that we'd ended up the way we were. Now I did things I wasn't proud of. I got myself addicted to drugs, but I'd managed to get off them only a few weeks before you found me. So the center acted like I was still addicted to drugs, or I wanted to start using again, when I'd only started using in the first place because it felt like the only escape from hell. And I was sent to a counselor, but all she did was grind me into the dirt. When I talked about the rape gangs, she made me out to be a sex addict who secretly liked it. When I talked about my sister, she told me I'd been secretly glad when she left me, maybe I even pushed her towards the Coalition so I wouldn't have to take care of her anymore." Tasha's voice was strained with the effort it took not to burst into tears. "That's why it's so hard for me to talk to counselors now, even Deanna and when she's not in her 'professional mode' I can tell her anything."

"Computer, cover office windows," Kate ordered. "It's okay, we're alone. Just cry it all out."

"They taught me that one too," she whispered. "On Turkana, I learned to cry silently, but I cried. But at the center I was punished for crying, because if I cried I was just pitching a fit to get attention. So I learned how to control my tears."

If it was possible, Kate hugged Tasha even more tightly. "Let those walls down. You're only hurting yourself by locking your emotions in this way."

At this point, Tasha could hardly have stopped the flood of her tears if she'd wanted to. She buried her face in her dear friend's shirt and let them come. She felt Kate continuing to comfort her and had never in her life been so grateful for the woman who she'd always regarded as a mixture of mother and older sister.

"If only I'd known I would have come for you in a second." Kate was close to tears herself. "I swear on my life I would have. I never would've left you in that place."

"I know. I see that now." Tasha slowly pulled herself together and lifted her head from the woman's blue jacket. "I'm sorry, I've been bawling all over you."

"Don't apologize, you needed that. From the looks of things, you've needed it for years. It's a jacket, I can replicate another one." She paused. "Tasha, what was the name of that center?"

"Um, the Nebraska Center For Special-Needs Orphaned Youth, usually just NCFS-NOY. Why?"

"It may be too late to do anything for you, but it's not too late to do something for the children still trapped in that place. The first thing I do when I get back to the Repulse is put in some inquiries about this center."

Tasha couldn't suppress a soft sigh when she remembered the original reason she'd come to Kate's office. "God, I'm going to miss you so much. There's no one else on the ship I can talk to like this, not even Data."

"Really? Or are you just afraid to trust him?"

Tasha's silence was as good an answer as any.

"Trust him, Tasha. I know he's worthy of it. And if all else fails, you can call me anytime, day or night. I promise."

xxxxxxxxx

Beverly Crusher stepped off the shuttle and glanced around the familiar-yet-foreign shuttlebay. It felt good, if a little strange, to be back.

She paused to collect her thoughts. Now, the first thing she would need to do was -

"MOM!"

"Wesley!" Her bag hit the floor with a crash as she opened her arms to embrace her son. "You've grown some. Keep this up and you're going to be taller than me."

"Welcome aboard, doctor." The captain was only a few steps behind the overexcited ensign.

"It's good to be back, Captain."

Will filed in next, followed by Geordi, Data, Deanna, and Worf. Beverly was kept busy for the next few minutes shaking hands and exchanging greetings.

"Wait a minute." Beverly finally noticed they were short a staff member. "Where's Tasha?"

"Here." Tasha spoke up from the doorway where she had just come in with Kate.

Beverly hurried over to greet Tasha and then performed a quick exchange of command with Kate. Once that was done, Kate turned to the assembled Enterprise staff members.

"I'd just like to say," she began, "that it's been an honor serving with all of you."

Another round of handshakes followed, this time accompanied by farewells. Kate accepted them all, began to walk to the shuttle, then turned back to pull Tasha into a final embrace.

"Am I missing something?" Beverly whispered to Deanna.

"Remember when Tasha said she and Kate had met?"

"Yes."

"I think it's safe to call that the understatement of the century. They were old friends, close friends, and I think they picked up where they left off."

Kate and Tasha separated with a final, whispered goodbye, and then Kate stepped up the ramp and into the shuttle. Just before the hatch closed, she waved one last time, and the entire staff waved back.

xxxxxxxxx

"Computer, bring up all files on record containing phrases Nebraska Center For Special-Needs Orphaned Youth and/or NCFS-NOY."

"Working," it intoned, and then a moment later, "files uploaded."

Kate sat at her terminal, reading through the articles. There were surprisingly few, and none of these mentioned the abuses Tasha had described. In fact, there was a disturbing lack of any information on the programs inside the facility.

But Kate wasn't the type to give up. Maybe public records didn't have the information she was looking for, but someone did, and she wasn't going to stop searching until she found that person and found out what she needed to know.

She owed that much to Tasha Yar.

I am "in the zone" today. I even expect to have the next chapter up within the next few days.

For those of you who like the episode-based chapters, I'm sorry to deviate from that format but I really wanted to show Kate's departure, and since I'm not planning on covering any episodes that take place until almost halfway through Season Three, I didn't think it would work to put any episode-based segments into a chapter that otherwise takes place before Season Three even starts or even to tack them onto the end. The episodes will be back next chapter.

The idea for the whole youth center bit really caught me blindsided. Probably came from the fact that I've been seeing some news articles about abusive boarding schools lately. That part was literally coming into my head as I was writing it. The concept will probably pop up again in future chapters.

Please Review. I'm really impressed that I got three reviews already for the chapter I just posted not twenty hours ago.