Shiiiiit, this is getting ridiculous on how long it's been. Computer issues, writer's block and stupid, drama-queen relatives are all to blame for all updates to be so late. I've worked on them as much as possible, here and there but then I've had to go back and redo that part, because the flow bothered me.

I've got a few fanfics on LiveJournal: http:/ kazi-kun. livejournal. com/tag /fanfic

And there's a reason why everything's posted on Kazi-kun's LJ, but certain entries are friend-locked, just as a warning.

Anyway, here's the latest installment of the proof of my insanity...

Ghost in the Shell: SAC-SSS/Full Metal Alchemist/Fushigi Yuugi

Mai-Hime/Code Geass/Sailor Moon/Shaman King

Naruto/Bleach/Karas/InuYasha

"Casualties of the Post War Era"

Chapter 10:

"Train Ride to Nowhere"

Hotaru stayed silent as Suzaku carried her to the train station. They had been the only ones at the platform and the sidewalks were deserted. It was late, Suzaku knew that, but this was a bit too deserted for his taste—even the train was practically empty. He instantly recognized something was up…especially since Hotaru let him carry her all the way to the train. He had half expected her to order him to put her down once he reached the bottom of the stairs but she hadn't, just letting him carry her as if he didn't have the crutch canes in his pockets.

"Hey, Hotaru?" Suzaku asked, getting a soft sound that he had gotten her attention. "Why did Knox say you were a Knight of Honor? Who's idea was it, Schniezel's?"

"….Carmine's…." Hotaru answered softly. "….she said it would be better that way….."

Suzaku looked at the girl he had sat next to him. "But why, when someone outside you two knew the truth?"

Hotaru was staring at the floor, not looking up. "Because only you knew. Schniezel told everyone that I had become his preferred foreign guard, mostly because if what I was, was ever leaked, I could have been used against him. Carmine said that being his knight meant that I was more important but I wasn't as close as a Rose. Cassius helped move the word along, talking to Cornelia about Honorary Britannians. She had said it was a great honor for someone like me to jump the process and just become Schniezel's knight, like you had been Euphemia's, within Odysseus' earshot."

"That explains the impromtu Knighting ceremony a couple days before Schniezel secretly joined the war." Suzaku muttered, not seeing Hotaru look away from the spot she was looking at. "Why do you get an escort when you land?"

"Because I'm still the Imperial Princess of Hong-Nan, the only surviving Xingese Imperial." Hotaru answered simply, still staring at the floor.

Made sense. "Back on the topic of Britannia, why are you so damned determined to get back there?"

"….because Horokeu's living in Britannia now…he told me he was going to stay there, since his village was wiped out by Charles…" So, there were other reasons for her nearly-desparate return to the Homeland. Why had he just jumped to conclusions like that?

"Miss being able to talk to another shaman, huh?" Suzaku earned a soft, bittersweet smile. "You're going to try to apologize again for Pirika's death, aren't you?"

"I took his friends, his family and his village away from him, Suzaku, all because I refused both Charles and Odysseus by becoming Schniezel's knight. Attacking Horokeu was Charles' way of getting back at me." Hotaru admitted, mildly surprising Suzaku. "Charles took his anger at me out on the things one of my reasons for living cared deeply for, knowing that if he hurt him, he hurt me because there was nothing else he could do to me that would hurt me more. If Charles had just attacked me out right, he wouldn't have done anything much in perspective but attack Horokeu and that which he cares for would wound me deeper than anything Charles could have done."

"You don't take personal attacks seriously, I know that, but to go out of his way to pick a fight with the shamans…that's just psychotic."

"The Power of Kings takes a psychological toll on the user after a while. Neither Rolo or Lelouch ever had that problem, or rather, they didn't get a chance to have that problem and Bismarck…Bismarck was so very careful on how he used his. The proof's with Marianne. She gained hers before she had children and she used it like Charles used his, thus affecting her long before she conceived Lelouch."

Suzaku looked at her again, seeing the soft depression on her face. He knew she had looked into Geass when Jeremiah, Lelouch, Rolo and Bismarck joined their cause. He knew she had studied the process that had given Jeremiah his Anti-Geass, making a connection to some other Geass power that C.C. and V.V. hadn't known about. C.C. had helped Hotaru as much as possible in understanding the different forms she knew of or had heard of but Hotaru had apparently gone deeper with her findings…when did she have time to go into more detailed research during the war? Was it when she and Schniezel were off together in Britannia?

Suzaku felt a stab of jealousy at that thought. He had known Hotaru since they were little kids. Where did Schniezel get off becoming so close to Hotaru?

"…what's waiting for you in Britannia?" Hotaru asked, looking at him from the corner of her eye.

"Lancelot, what else?" Suzaku tried to make a joke but it only got Hotaru to look back at the floor. "What, you didn't like the joke?"

"Joke?"

"I don't have anything in Britannia that's really waiting for me but I have a good friend having a pretty rough week and she needs all the support she can get, when she has to face down a senile old man and his closet pervert son." Suzaku got Hotaru to actually look at him with a bit of shock on her face. "I mean, you should see her. Despite all the crap she does to herself and all the abuse she takes, she's still the same girl I knew when I was little, just a tiny bit darker."

Hotaru smiled softly, closing her eyes and turning back to face the floor, her eyes opening part way. "You still think I'm so perfect, so complete…if you only knew the truth, you wouldn't think of me like that anymore."

"I doubt that." Suzaku retorted. "You're still the same, no matter what you think. You protected those people, those kids back at your apartment complex and you got the punks to be polite and respectful. You're still the same."

"…no, I'm not…." Hotaru murmured, not looking at Suzaku. She closed her eyes again and leaned back, despite the pain in her back.

Okay, time to change the subject. "Why Schneizel?"

Hotaru opened her eyes part way, staring at the ceiling. "…does it matter 'why Schneizel' or could you just let it go?"

"Yeah, it matters." Suzaku said, looking at her. "And no, I'm not going to let it go. You're acting like you're addicted to him, like he's your drug. What the hell happened between you two that you'd crave his company over anything else?"

Hotaru was silent for a moment, still staring at the ceiling. When she finally spoke, her voice was barely audible.

"…because he is what he is to me…"

Now, that made absolutely no sense…and Suzaku doubted he'd get a straight answer out of her when she was like this. In the past, only Kallen could have deciphered what she was saying, what she really meant. Suzaku didn't really get it then—hell, he didn't get it now.

"Why can't you give me a straight answer for once?" Suzaku muttered with an annoyed scowl.

Hotaru only closed her eyes with a small smirk playing on her lips.

Heh, a confused canary...

Suzaku: Shuddup.

Wow, cranky bastard, ain't ya?

Well, read and review, plz. I'll do my best to do better.