Donkeyskin

Once upon a time, a king had a beautiful wife and a rich castle, including a marvelous donkey whose droppings were gold. One day his wife died, after making him promise not to marry except to a woman whose beauty and attributes equaled hers. The king grieved, but was, in time, persuaded to seek another wife. It became clear that the only woman who would fit the promise was his own daughter.

She went to her fairy godmother who advised her to make impossible demands as a condition of her consent: a dress the color of the sky, a dress the color of the moon, a dress as bright as the sun, and finally, the hide of his marvelous donkey. Such was the king's desire to marry her that he granted all of them. The fairy godmother gave her a marvelous chest to contain all she owned and told her that the donkeyskin would make an excellent disguise.

The princess fled and eventually found a royal farm where they let her work in the kitchen, despite her ugliness in the donkeyskin. On feast days, she would dress herself in the fine gowns her father had given her, and one such day, the prince came by her room and peeped through the keyhole. He fell in love at once, fell ill with his longing, and declared that nothing would cure him but a cake baked by Donkeyskin, and nothing they could say of what a dirty creature she was dissuaded him.

When Donkeyskin baked the cake, a ring of hers fell in it. The prince found it and declared that he would marry only the woman whose finger it fit. Every other woman having failed, he insisted that Donkeyskin try, and it fit. When she had dressed herself in her fine gowns, his parents were reconciled with the match. Donkeyskin later found that her father had remarried to a beautiful widow.

And they all lived happily ever after.

Mother is dead.

She's been dead for a few weeks now.

Now that's she's gone, the only one left to rule the kingdom is my elder brother. And what a wonderful king he will be. But... Mother isn't content with the goodness of my brother's heart. She is... ambitious.

Mother doesn't want brother to be a good king. She wants him to be her ideal king.

She wants him to be strong, kind, smart, brave, handsome - why, he's already all of these things, yes, but she wants more. She wants him to be the richest, the most beloved, the best. She wants him to have the most intelligent children, and the most beautiful wife.

Ah.

That brings us to the subject of a wife.

You see, mother is - was - very... picky about her beauty standards. If you're not 'beautiful' to her, then you're not worthy of anything. And I mean anything. So, Mother decided that brother could only marry someone that was at least as beautiful as her because she considered herself to be the most beautiful woman in the world.

Yikes.

Brother was... upset, to say the very least. After all, what kind of mother wants their son to marry someone that looks like them? But she made him promise. I still don't know how she did it.

So then the search began. Mother supervised the first bit herself, picking out girls she was alright with and would never accept. Which is too bad, really, because while Mother was alive my brother met this beautiful, strong woman. You could really tell that he fell in love with her, but... Mother said she wasn't beautiful enough. Of course, Brother listened to her, because that's what he's always done.

He always listened to Mother.

Sometimes I feel like Mother brainwashed Brother, like she's done something to ensure that he always listens to her. Sometimes I wish that he'd just... stop and listen to me sometimes. And yes, I understand that Mother knows what's best for the both of us, but...

Mother never really bothered to talk to me, so I never felt the same sort of defensiveness, that same sort of love for her as Brother did. I think she was never around because my eyes aren't the same color. Mother didn't like looking at my flaws. They reminded her too much of her own.

But still...

Mother really fucked up this time. She really did.

Why on Elrios would she tell Brother that I was the only one beautiful enough for her to accept?! I don't understand her at all! Sure, so I look a bit like her, but that doesn't mean that everyone else out there is hideous. Really. She should know. Besides, I don't do incest.

But, of course, my brainwashed older brother decided that it'd be okay to listen to Mother's dying words. Although he said it would be okay if I made it as hard as humanly possible for him to fulfil her final request. No problem with me.

So I asked my godmother. Well, she's not really my godmother, but I refuse to call Gloria a nanny. She's more of a mother to me than my actual mother. Gloria, being her usual, sunny self, gave me a fairly decent piece of advice.

"Just ask for something ridiculous. I mean, your brother is terrible with anything girly, right? How about you ask him for... um... dresses? In impossible colors? Like, maybe something that changes color or is impossible to look at? And then maybe... I dunno, ask him for a fur coat! Guys never know what type of fur a girl likes. It's almost like it's not in their genetics, or that the Gods haven't blessed them with the ability to please women. Really."

At this point, Gloria had started playing with her white-blonde hair. I always liked her hair; it was so exotic for a distant country like ours. When paired with her not-so-rare golden eyes and short stature, she cut quite the striking figure.

"So why not go with that? If you really want insurance, ask for dresses AND a fur coat! I'm sure it'll throw him for a loop."

I stuck my tongue out, crossing my arms grumpily. "Yeah, but I don't like that sort of thing..." Gloria snorted, rolling around on the ground, not seeming to care if her white-and-gold garb got covered in grass stains.

"Even better. That means he'd never have any experience looking for this type of thing! Which means that there's a better chance that you won't end up having to commit incest on behalf of your dead mother's wishes!"

Ouch. When Gloria put it that way, it really DID seem terrible. Not that it was okay in the first place.

"So just force him outside his comfort zone, and he won't be able to do a thing. Problem solved!"

Which is why I ended up requesting three things from my brother: A skirt that changed colors with the sky (because I don't like all the long dresses he was sure to pick), a belt that was brighter than the sun, and the pelt of a great fox. I knew that brother loved foxes, so there was no way he would give me one.

Too bad Mother brainwashed him really well.

When he showed up the next day with the things I asked him for... wow. That was a horrible day, now that I think about it. I was absolutely furious. How had he even gotten those damn things?! But by the sheepish look on his face, I knew that he went to go ask the pretty redhead he was practically infatuated with for help. Which ordinarily wouldn't have bothered me, but...

"Gloria! Your advice sucks!"

Gloria rolled over, staring at me with wide eyes. "What?"

I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms in an irritated manner. "I bet you didn't realize that Brother has a lady friend he can rely on now. Plus he must've used some weird magic shit or something to make everything work!"

Gloria cut in. "He probably just got a reflective skirt and a belt made of pure gold."

I rubbed my eyes angrily. "Then it's even worse that he could find those things so easily! And that stupid belt is hurting my eyes... I wish it wasn't so goddamn bright!"

Gloria giggled. "Oh, my dear little baby, don't you realize that I always prepare for the worst? Take the fox pelt - yes that one, don't look so disgusted, and put in to. Make sure you cover your hair, darling~!" I made a face, carefully pulling the fox's head over my own. Yuck. Never asking for anything animal pelt again. It stinks like hell. Gloria giggled, seeing my face. "That should be an okay disguise. After all, people are pretty stupid in the first place. They'll see the fox pelt, go 'Eww, animal skin, she's so gross that there's no way she's a princess,' and you'll be free to run around wherever you want to go!"

I rolled my eyes. "And if it doesn't work?"

Gloria shrugged. "Then you'll be dragged back to the palace. But hey, it's worth a shot!"

And you know what?

It worked. Sort of.

I managed to sneak out of the castle and travel to the next kingdom over. Except there they mistook me for a girl looking for work, and now I'm stuck working in the Royal Kitchens until they decide they want to let me go. On the bright side, everyone thinks I'm the weird, ugly girl that no one wants to talk to (People are so shallow. Just because I didn't give my name, they call me Foxy. Rude much?)! Which means I'll never be discovered, right?

...Shit.

I just jinxed myself, didn't I?

[A/N:]

*burst out of piles of junk called life* I'M NOT DEAD! I SWEAR I'M STILL ALIVE! Is it just me or is that my standard greeting now? So we're back with another chapter of Fairless! Which means... Guess the pairing! The female character is so drop-dead obvious here I will cry if no one gets it. But, to compensate, I didn't really mention our main male lead! So guess, guess, guess, and may the odds be ever in your favour! On a side note, I'm considering switching to PM replies for members to clear up my Author Notes. Thoughts?

And now onto REVIEWER REPLIES!

Risingwind: Because she cray-cray. Question answered?

Sugarlatte: Aww, thank you very much! That's actually sho sweet -u- Of course you can! And a happy... something to you too (because it's a bit late for Christmas greetings XD)!

Parkingitin: Thank you very much for your amazing praise! I hope you continue to read and enjoy my future works!

Astaria Mel Kanariane: ...Meep... Because Donkey Skin can be Fox Skin?

Yami: Yay for confusing! It wasn't meant to be confusing, but it just came out that way XD As for grotesqueness... What can I say, it's a (sometimes terrifying) gift? And yes, poor Chung. He was so innocent, too.

Yup. I'm done now. And now to start frantically typing up a chapter of SII that should've been done ages ago, followed by an overdue OME! So! Don't forget to R&R, follow and favorite if you want, and see you all next chapter!