Haruhi woke sometime later with an achy feeling settled in her chest, it was too cold but even still she forced herself to sit up. She had to get ready for school even if her body protested wildly to the idea. She felt very dizzy and her upper body swayed a bit as she heard the door open and close, light and sure footfalls sounded across her floor. Even though not knowing who was with her filled her with fear she felt oddly calm. A light whisper in her head telling her it was alright because she knew this person. When she turned her head to gaze in the direction the person seemed to be she was met with a bright purple flame amidst the darkness that was her blind world. A color that fit Kyoya to the letter; refined but flowing with air of untamed brilliance, warmth underlining the cold exterior.

"You shouldn't be up yet, you have a nasty fever." Kyoya said.

"I'm fine." I responded, lifting the covers back and getting up only to wobble and fall right into his arms.

"No, you're not. Lay back down." He gently pushed me back into bed and lifted the covers up to my quaking shoulders.

A scrapping sound filled the silence followed by some shuffling. That bright purple flame dancing around the dark space that finally settled down at the desk that was next to my bed. A clicking sound started up; no doubt Kyoya was doing some form of work or research. We settled into that silence for a while, as I lay there pondering how stupid it was to go running out into the rain. The school grounds were huge and I only learned enough to get to my classes, home, and to the club room. So it was incredibly stupid for a blind girl to go running off in God knew which direction. I turned over and stared at the purple flame that made me feel safe, made me feel as if I knew that color somewhere in a past life.

"Kyoya, I'm sorry." I whispered.

"What do you have to be sorry for? We should have told you about our night classes." The typing stopped.

"No. I should have trusted you more. We have only known each other for a little while so of course there are things you haven't told me yet."

"Haruhi, we are also to blame. Don't think you have to shoulder it all yourself."

"I'm also sorry for running off like that. It was foolish."

The silence continued for a while, the typing started up again and I knew that was his way for both apologizing and forgiving me. But even if he forgave me, I didn't know the others would after I had no doubt worried them so much. A pang of nostalgia hit my heart in a stab of pain; it felt as if I had done that before. Like that dream you woke from with only a piece of it you could remember or a small feeling you felt long after that sleepy fog left. It was irritating to say the least, to feel something like that but not being able to remember it at all. Much like the feeling I had that they wanted-no, needed to tell me but remained silent for fear of something. I could only guess as to what that fear was and each idea I had was worse than the last.

"I would give you aspirin but human medicine doesn't work on people like us." Kyoya's voice shattered my thoughts.

"It's alright; I'll survive a small fever." The silence pressed for a little while.

"Haruhi…" Kyoya started.

"Kyoya I know you guys want to tell me something but you're afraid too. You don't have to be and you don't have to tell me now, but I will be here to listen if you need me to be." I felt the bed dip with the added weight as he wrapped his arms around me and buried his nose in my hair next to the hand he placed there. He was trembling, but his embrace so gentle it was as if he thought I might shatter if he didn't hold me so warmly.

"We are afraid Haruhi. Afraid for you, because you are special but others won't see you that way. We don't want to scare you." His voice seemed to break more and more as his sentence dragged on.

"I think that if I survived being an experiment mostly intact I can handle what you have to tell me." I smiled at him, curling farther into the warm fire that was Kyoya.

"Damphir's are rare Haruhi, even ones involving humans. But Damphir's are wild, unable to or unwanting to learn the rules of our world. They can't be controlled so they… they are killed." I jumped at that, molding myself to his front in effort to escape what he was saying.

"We can save you from that, you can stay just as you are if you want but we would always fear what would happen if anyone found out. We could make you a full Demon or a full Angel but you might be different. We love you Haruhi, just as you are and we don't know what to do." I felt drops of water hit my hair and heard his breath hitch.

"How would I be different?" I asked as I pulled away to lay my hand on his cheek, pushing away the tears that he so desperately tried to hide.

"You… you might hate us if you were an Angel. You could turn into a monster bent on death and destruction if you were a Demon. The you that is Haruhi, our dear Haruhi, might disappear to be replaced by Ihurah. No one wants to admit it Haruhi but we are scared, terrified even." I held his head in my hands, studying how that purple flame danced and wavered in a pain so tangible it made my heart ache to see it there.

"Why is it that I hear in your voice that you have never known fear and loss, but I feel as if you had?" I heard him chuckle.

"Your powers are growing. We all were bonded to the same woman once, she was everything to us. So much like you; always hiding the pain of her life behind a never ending smile that was always real. She died before we could save her. We had tried to help her, to take away her pain by getting rid of the one who caused it but she always told us not to and before her face, we were powerless to disobey."

We remained silent for a while as he let that sink in, I had known that there was something but I had no idea it was so terrible. Suddenly it all seemed to make sense to me. The woman they were unable to save, they had reflected that to me. Saving me from my father, being there for me when I was unsure about my own existence, and worrying so much about me even with only knowing me a short time. I wanted to smile and at the same time I wanted to cry. Did they love me as I am or did they want to somehow atone for the one they were unable to save? The question circled my mind but I pushed it to the side. Kyoya and the others needed me, they needed me to be strong for them. I couldn't run and hide from what I am.

"I think… that I want to stay like this a little while longer." I whispered.

"Haruhi… are you sure?"

"Yes. I want to think about it a bit. I know you would try to help me through the bloodlust but…" I trailed off.

"I know. I am sorry. If we could we would keep you as you are forever." I felt him nod.

"Hey I am a little tired, would you stay here for a bit?" Kyoya hummed an affirmative but I couldn't be sure if that was the computer or him as I drifted off to sleep with thoughts of change whirling around my mind.

In my dream, or at least I thought it was a dream, I faced a mirror that showed my reflection that I could clearly see. But my hair was only waist length in the waking world, but the mirror showed it to be floor length with a lock running from above my left eye over my nose and down to end somewhere near my stomach. My eyes were brown but the reflection showed one a striking blue and the other an eerie crimson color. The lips and nose where the same but my reflection showed fangs instead of blunt teeth. I didn't know whether I should call the reflection her or me. She looked like me but I didn't have those features, I never did. Or did I and I just couldn't remember it? Whichever the answer I continued to stare, trailing my eyes up to the wings at her back. One white as snow and without blemish, not even dirt. The other so black it seemed to bend the nonexistent light and absorb it fully. I raised my hand but she didn't, she just stared. At the top of the mirror was one single word;

"Ihurah." I whispered and she nodded.

"You're me." She shook her head no.

"But you are. You are a part of me, the strong one." Again she shook her head.

"Me… Keep…sssssafe…" she hissed and pointed at me. I touched the mirror but Ihurah remained still as a statue, words danced across the mirrors surface in a familiar scrawl that was foreign to me.

"Are you happy here?" I asked her.

"Not happy…. You not sssssafe…" she hissed again.

"You are not happy… because I am not safe?" she nodded at that.

"But why? The others will protect me." I tried to reassure her. Her eyes flashed.

"They not safe! They can't keep you safe! Not from him." Her voice twisted, rising to a shout. I kept my hand on the mirror, she seemed to be able to talk better then.

"He will never get to us again. I won't let him hurt you again." She shook her head.

"What power do you have?" she asked.

I froze then, knowing she was mostly right. I didn't have her power and I wouldn't so long as I feared what she might do to innocent people and to the ones I care about. I thought about what Kyoya said, about the possibility of me being a monster should I choose to be a demon. As much as I was afraid of her power, I was even more afraid at that thought. I didn't want to hurt anyone. I wondered briefly about the Fallen Angel I met the other day, he seemed fine and in control of himself. Not a monster in the least. I felt tears prick at my eyes as I thought about what I wanted to do; what I had to do. Ihurah gave me a small smile and nodded, giving me permission should I choose to go through with it. I cried as I pulled her out of the mirror and hugged her tightly, which she returned.

"Stop crying." She whispered. I shook my head into her shoulder, I didn't want to lose her. My only friend.

"You have to choose." Her voice echoed in the darkness.

"Fallen. I want to be a Fallen Angel." I looked at her.

"I thought you might." She smiled at me and before my eyes, she began to crack and break like the mirror behind her. I felt pressure in my eyes and mouth, a sharp sting in my back. Ihurah turned to dust as I woke up screaming.