Thanks for all your support! I must admit uploading this chapter was a little nerve wracking. NEVER have I broken up a couple that I love so much in my own writing. It was very hard to do, but I promise they aren't done and they will be back together before the end of the story and the angst will pass.

Like I said, this was a tough one for me. Part of the purpose of this chapter is to encourage people to be careful at parties. People at parties can be trouble. Anyway, please review if you want me to continue!

Chapter 10: Last Christmas

Standing in the airport terminal at JFK, Emma was growing increasingly nervous. It had been a couple weeks, but she was still kicking herself in the butt for what happened at the party the night of Sectionals. She hadn't been trying to get drunk. She was pretty sure that Ivy had slipped something in the coke she handed her. She shouldn't have even taken a coke from Ivy. That girl was bad news.

But she'd made some of the biggest mistakes of her life. It was a good thing she'd gotten out early, because things could have gotten a lot worse if she'd stayed longer. She had been drunk and hadn't been able to think properly. She was better than that and she was so mad at herself. She'd been holding back on telling Nick about that night. She was sure he'd be mad at her. She was mad enough at herself. She knew that her parents had also been mad at her. In fact, they grounded her until Christmas break started. Break was starting this morning, and Nick and Ava were going to be in New York and going back to Ohio on Christmas Eve. Emma would have been excited to see Nick, but she was not looking forward to the inevitable conversation they'd need to have.

She hadn't told anyone except her parents and Ryan about what happened. She was too embarrassed to tell anyone else. Of course, this week she'd inevitably have to tell Ava, too. What if Nick wanted to break up?

"Sweetie, it'll be okay," Finn whispered to Emma. "I forgave your mom, Nick will forgive you."

Emma got tears in her eyes. "Dad, I was drunk and I didn't even try to get drunk. I didn't know what I was doing. If I'd been sober, I wouldn't have played spin the bottle. Griffin doesn't mean anything to me." She had been so drunk she hadn't fully realized what she was doing. She found out that she'd kissed Griffin during spin the bottle when she saw pictures from the party. She was so ashamed.

"I know," Finn said. "You love Nick."

Emma sighed and looked at Finn. "When should I tell him?"

Finn looked at Emma. "Tell him when it feels like the right time."

"I'm so angry at myself," Emma said. "I'm under 21. I shouldn't have even been drinking. I'm never drinking again. EVER."

"Just tell him about how you didn't mean to get drunk," Finn said. "Your mom and I were disappointed in you when we first found out, but we forgave you. He'll forgive you too. Just give him some time."

"Do you think he'll break up with me?" Emma asked nervously.

"I don't know," Finn admitted. "Let's just enjoy tonight."

Emma watched as her boyfriend came off the plane. She gave him a tight hug, but couldn't stop thinking about what happened a few weeks ago. She was barely able to keep her mind on what he was saying. She confessed what had happened to Ava at bedtime that night, and Ava had known about it from Ryan. Ava encouraged Emma to tell Nick. She thought that he'd understand. Emma hadn't intended to get drunk.

The next day, Emma and Nick went for a horse-drawn carriage ride around Central Park and out to lunch at a cafe near Central Park, and then ice skating in Central Park. She had so much fun with him, she didn't want to confess the inevitable truth. There may not be much fun in the future if she did. But she had to be honest. By the time she got on the bus to go home, she knew that much.

"Are you okay?" Nick asked. "I know you, and something hasn't been quite right with you during these past few days.

He knew something was wrong and she couldn't keep up denying it. She needed to tell him the truth. "Uh, Nick?"

"Yeah?"

"I need to tell you something."

"Okay, what is it? You know you can tell me anything."

Emma looked at the ground. "The evening of our Sectionals, there was a party at one of the other girls' houses in my choir. They were serving alcohol at the party. I got drunk and couldn't think straight. I wasn't even trying to get drunk. I think this girl in the group who doesn't like me slipped something into my coke. But either way, I got drunk, and I wasn't functioning properly. I'm so mad at myself. I was drunk and didn't know what I was doing, but I ended up playing spin the bottle and I kissed this boy named Griffin... I needed to tell you about what happened. I wanted to tell you that I have no feelings for Griffin... I was drunk and stupid and trying to fit in with the group..." She couldn't bear to look at him, but she could tell he was mad at her. She was mad at herself, too, and could tell that this wasn't good.

Nick sat there in silence for a few minutes. He finally spoke: "Maybe you should find somewhere else on the bus to sit."

Emma gave him a confused look. "What?"

"Well, Emma, I loved you for many reasons, but I NEVER imagined - "

"You LOVED me? What do you mean you LOVED me?"

Several other people on the bus were looking.

"I mean what I said. I LOVED you."

"You're breaking up with me?"

"Yeah, I'm breaking up with you."

"You told me you never would!"

"I never imagined you'd cheat on me. Didn't you learn anything from what happened with Mackenzie? There's nothing to talk about. You and I are over."

"Nick, please," Emma pleaded. She had a feeling this would be coming. She prayed it wouldn't happen. Now what was she supposed to do? She was drunk, she didn't think that counted as cheating. Apparently it did count. She had no feelings for Griffin. She wasn't trying to kiss Griffin. She hadn't wanted to kiss Griffin.

Nick got up to sit in another part of the bus, and Emma stayed in her seat. She was so angry at herself.

Nick didn't speak to Emma when the bus stopped at the Hudsons' apartment building. He went straight to Ryan's room and closed the door. Emma barely bothered to say hi to her family in the living room. She had to punish herself somehow, although Nick breaking up with her was punishment enough.

She heard a knock on her door. "Come in," Emma mumbled, looking up to see Rachel coming in.

"You told him?" Rachel asked.

Emma nodded and looked at the ground. "He broke up with me."

Rachel looked at Emma. "I had a feeling this would happen."

"I don't care about Griffin!" Emma thundered. "Ivy got me drunk!"

Rachel held her daughter close.

"Mom, why?" Emma sobbed.

"He was hurt, and he has a right to be," Rachel said.

"He's acting as if I just decided to go hook up with another guy for no reason!" Emma sobbed.

"What you did still qualifies as cheating, regardless of the circumstances," Rachel said. "You kissed another boy when you were in a relationship."

Emma felt herself losing it. "Mom, seriously? Now I've lost everything I still had! I was moved from my secure world back home. I'm not good enough here! I'm not good enough to play sports, I'm not good enough to write decent stories for the school paper, I'm not good enough to have solos in the show choir. Nick was all I still had, the only thing that made me worthy. And now I don't have him!" She threw herself on the bed. Rachel didn't say anything, she just rubbed Emma's back.

"Could you go, Mom?" Emma whispered. "I'd really just like to be alone right now."

"I don't have a show tonight, so I'll be home if you need me," Rachel said.

After Rachel left the room, Emma's mind flashed back to that summer. Nick's family had taken her along to a family function at Lake Erie, and they had just been playing in the lake together, him in his navy blue swim trunks with the silver stripe, her in her pink bikini with the white polka dots. The water had been cold and she was afraid to get in. He decided to pick her up and throw her in.

"NICHOLAS!" Emma had screamed. "How dare you!"

"Because I love you!" Nick had said.

"Oh yeah?" Emma pushed Nick into the lake. "NOW do you love me?"

"We're even." Nick grabbed Emma.

"How do those two manage to act like an old married couple and a pair of preschoolers at the same time?" Emma had heard Nick's grandmother say.

"They're so cute," Grace had said.

Nick and Emma retreated to the beach, where they lay side by side. "This place is so beautiful," Emma sighed.

"YOU are so beautiful."

"I love you." Emma kissed Nick.

"I love you, too. Whenever I'm with you, I feel like I can totally be myself and I never have to worry."

"Same for when I'm with you. I feel like no matter what I say or do, you'll still love me."

"I'll never break up with you."

"I'll never break up with you, either."

Emma was snapped back into reality. "So much for that," she said to herself. Nick had broken up with her.

x

The week was not the week Emma had been hoping for. Nick spent most of the week going out for the day with Ryan and Ava. Ryan and Ava both tried to convince Emma to come with them, but she was worried about how he'd act if she went along. When Ryan and Nick did boy things, Emma got to spend time with Ava. They went to see Rachel's show, where Ryan and Nick sat at one end of the row and Emma sat with Ava at the other. Nick didn't talk to Emma during the coming days and she was losing hope. She didn't think she'd be getting her boyfriend back anytime soon. With him refusing to talk to her, she wasn't sure if she'd ever get him back.

The day before Nick and Ava flew back to Ohio, Ryan and Ava told Emma that she needed to get out of the house and asked her to come with them to see a Christmas light display. (Supposedly, Grant wanted to be able to play with Nick that afternoon.) Emma agreed to go out with her brother and her best friend, but couldn't help but be upset when she saw them holding hands or leaning against each other. When they finished looking at the display, Ryan turned to Emma and said, "I know he isn't over you."

"Then why won't he talk to me?" Emma asked.

"He won't talk about her when we go out," Ava said to Ryan. Emma felt a sting of disappointment. When Ryan had said that, she thought that she might actually be close to forgiveness.

"He talks about you in his sleep at night," Ryan said. "Don't give up. It's not over between you two."

But Nick wouldn't talk to Emma at home. Emma figured she'd make an attempt for forgiveness at the airport tomorrow. Nick wouldn't sit with her on the train to the airport, but she had his Christmas present that she'd picked out weeks ago wrapped and in her bookbag. As they began to walk into the airport, Nick looked at Emma and said, "Why do you have your bookbag? You're not the one who's flying somewhere." He gave her one of those smiles he seemed to reserve for her. Maybe by not pressuring him this week, he'd had enough time to forgive her.

"I actually have something for you in it," Emma said, taking advantage of the opportunity. She smiled and got out the gift wrapped box. "Merry Christmas."

Nick didn't look too happy anymore. "Emma, I know what you're trying to do and it's not going to work. I'm not ready yet."

Emma groaned. Nick didn't give her the box back, that was a good sign, right? She tried to focus on the positive. The flight hadn't started boarding yet, so she still had time. The airport was decorated for Christmas, but she felt very little personal cheer. When she heard the music on the radio, she couldn't help but feel the lyrics of the song applied to her.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart But the very next day you gave it away This year To save me from tears I'll give it to someone special Once bitten and twice shy I kept my distance But you still catch my eye Tell me baby Do you recognize me? Oh Well, it's been a year It doesn't surprise me Last Christmas I wrapped it up and sent it With a note saying "I love you" I meant it Now I know what a fool I've been But if you kissed me now I know you'd fool me again Last Christmas I gave you my heart But the very next day you gave it away This year To save me from tears I'll give it to someone special.

x

"Flight 248 to Cleveland boarding," came the announcement over the loudspeaker. Rachel could see the pain in Emma's face. This brought back so many bad memories. It was around this time when she and Finn had broken up their junior year for similar reasons. She watched as Emma hugged Ava goodbye, but Emma and Nick did not say goodbye. Nick looked at Finn and Rachel and said, "Thanks for having me."

"You're welcome anytime," Finn said.

"Thanks, and merry Christmas," Nick said.

As Nick and Ava headed for the terminal, Rachel put her arm around Emma. She knew how hard this was. Nick was looking over his shoulder as he walked towards the terminal, and Rachel saw him give Emma a tentative smile. Finn whispered to Rachel that Emma had smiled back. Emma then turned and started talking to Sarah, but Rachel noticed as Nick paused and held a gaze on Emma for a few seconds before disappearing down the terminal. She wasn't giving up hope on her daughter and she hoped Emma wasn't giving up either.

Chapter 11 preview: Rachel's final Wicked show and first West Side Story show. Rachel tries to help Emma feel better about the breakup. Some Finchel and Ryva moments.