CH 10 - Thursday 'Moving In'
AN: Many many thanks to my beta, AnachronisticAnglophile, who didn't hesitate to give me a sharp poke when things weren't working, and also to MiaMadwyn, who held my hand while I fixed it up. *squishes you both*
Another thank you must go to reader lucyferr, who offered some very creative suggestions for how I should punish the Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs. I chose a rather less interesting route, but I definitely enjoyed and appreciated your suggestions!
When he re-entered the Hospital Wing quite early the next morning, Severus' movements did not go unnoticed. On closing the door with the softest of thuds, which he privately thought was quite an achievement given the castle's heavy, Medieval-style doors, Athena's head immediately popped up from behind the inert lump that was Hermione Granger. On seeing him, she quickly scrambled out of bed and leapt into his arms, trying (but failing) to speak softly.
'Shh, Daddy. Remember what happened last time we woke Mummy?'
Intrigued, but deciding the story could wait, Severus lightly chided the girl. 'Good morning is a rather more suitable greeting, is it not, Athena?'
'Yes, yes,' replied the child impatiently. 'Good morning, Daddy.' She then continued, 'Mummy and I are friends again, and she's not angry with me, so can we all go home this morning? I don't want to stay with Aunt Ginny anymore.'
'Are you sure you don't want to stay with Aunt Ginny a little longer?' Severus queried with a raised eyebrow. Minerva had told him to prepare for Athena's possible removal to the dungeons, but he had no doubt that the headmistress would declare her undying love for Peeves before she allowed a student to do so as well.
'Silly Daddy. Mummy only wanted to stay with Aunt Ginny because she wanted to see me,' Athena replied confidently. 'I'm bored now. Aunt Ginny doesn't have any toys.'
Severus showed his amusement at Athena's obviously selfish desire to return 'home' with nothing more than a slight twitch of his lips. However, he narrowed his eyes when he noticed that Hermione was also smiling and breathing much too lightly for deep slumber.
'Since,' he said, swallowing in an attempt not to gag over the next words and to inject as much vitriol into his tone as possible, 'your motherseems to be awake, maybe she would care to share her no doubt numerous thoughts on the matter.'
That would teach Granger to listen in on private conversations. There was no way she would agree to live in the dungeons.
*****
Hermione was quite touched by the affectionate exchange she overheard between Athena and the Professor. Although she had seen enough of their interaction over the past few days to know that he was not always unpleasant, hearing him converse with Athena made him seem more approachable than ever before. It seemed that he had truly taken to parenting like a Niffler to gold. Hermione had to bite her lip to avoid laughing aloud, hearing him dryly correct Athena's manners only to be quickly dismissed by the four-year-old. Clearly, Athena was accustomed to (and in no way put off by) her father's highly critical nature.
The smile abruptly left her face when she heard herself being addressed by the Professor. When she opened her eyes and tried to gather what shreds of dignity she could after being caught eavesdropping, it took Hermione a few seconds to process what he had actually said.
She blinked.
What on earth does he expect me to say?
For the first time in her life so far, Hermione had absolutely no answer to give or opinion to share with her very irritated-looking Professor.
Is he really that upset that I pretended to be asleep? What a strange man he is…
Unfortunately for her, the tension between them only mounted even higher when Athena reiterated her plans for them all.
'We're going home today, Mummy. Daddy just agreed.'
'I said no such thing. How dare you put words in my mouth?' snapped Professor Snape, his fierce scowl for once directed at the little girl.
When Athena's lip started trembling and her little shoulders started shaking, Hermione's previous indecision and confusion was engulfed by the anger she now felt towards the heartless bastard who was making her daughter cry.
'Come here, sweetie,' she said gently, when Athena seemed to stand frozen, sobs growing in volume even while she tried valiantly to meet her father's glare.
At Hermione's words, the fight visibly drained out of Athena. The poor child had been pushed above and beyond her breaking point. Exhausted from her troubles over the past few days, she allowed herself to be pulled into her mother's arms, but the quiet snuffling and sobbing scared Hermione more than loud screams and wails would have done.
Glaring over Athena's head at a visibly stricken Professor Snape, Hermione's rage was only partly mollified when she saw how deeply he seemed to be affected by the results of his actions. Her Professor or not, propriety and respect could go to hell.
'Of course we're going home today, love,' she said gently, while her uncharacteristically steely eyes dared the Professor to disagree. 'Daddy just woke up on the wrong side of bed this morning.' And most likely every other morning too, she mentally added.
To her surprise, the Professor did not bother to contradict her. As evidenced by his next words, Hermione doubted he had even heard a word she said.
'You will stay with me until things are back to normal,' he ordered brusquely, clearly expecting her to have qualms about this arrangement. 'Make your way to my office after dinner. As much as I fear it might be beyond your abilities, be discreet.' The last was almost a hiss.
*****
When Athena started crying because of his thoughtlessness, Severus went into mild shock, cursing his lack of vigilance and control since the war. It had never crossed his mind that such a small comment might backfire quite so badly. He may be unused to having emotional dependents, but Salazar strike him down if he wasn't more careful in the future.
When he considered the provocation presented by the insufferable Miss Granger, Severus was more than a little inclined to lay the blame for his actions squarely at her feet. He and Athena had been getting along perfectly fine without a mother getting in the way. Still, to give credit where it was due, the annoying Granger chit was a more skilful adversary than he expected. Contrary to what she probably thought, he had heard every word of her little reprimand, and found himself unwillingly impressed with her nerve and maturity. She had raised a sword where he expected a shield, leaving him to parry.
There is no shame in a tactical retreat every now and then, but she doesn't have to know that…
Knowing it would probably end badly, Severus made what would probably be the second most impulsive decision in his life at that moment when he more or less ordered her into his home. He knew there would be hell to pay with Minerva for what the uptight old woman would, no doubt, view as totally inappropriate fraternisation with a student. However, from his perspective, he reasoned that at least this latest fit of rash behaviour could not possibly result in being shackled to a psychopath with nothing but an ugly, permanent tattoo and several recurring nightmares to show for it.
Determined not to let Granger have any more input into decision-making, Severus realised that he could kill two birds with one stone when he hit on a way to make amends to Athena. It just so happened that he had not yet made any changes to his quarters in order to accommodate her.
Ignoring the hostile glares he was getting from the know-it-all, he gently took Athena out of her arms and whispered to the little girl.
'Athena, the house-elves have been cleaning the dungeons while you were staying with your aunt, so everything might look a bit different. Why don't we go to Hogsmeade this weekend and get some new things for your room?' Though he knew he would not regret this little ploy if it worked, he internally grimaced a little at the outright lies he had been reduced to. One would think he had gained nothing from a lifetime of espionage.
I cannot believe I am grovelling to a child. Trust Minerva to set me such an impossible task! The mouldy old hag gets more like Dumbledore with each passing day. How am I supposed to make Athena feel at home when I have no idea what I might have done to the space in the future?
Even as he internally railed against unreasonable Headmistresses who took presumptuous liberties with a colleague's private quarters, Severus could still appreciate irony. Whilst his daughter was likely observant enough to notice a change to her home, it was yet far beyond her abilities to grasp that she had travelled back Merlin-knew-how-many-years in time.
Actually, the particular timeframe he was expected to work to was something Severus planned to find out in the near future. He grudgingly supposed Miss Granger might also be interested in such knowledge. All this would be much easier to cope with if he had something around which to organise himself, an action plan of sorts. Not for the first time this week, Severus bemoaned that his conscience would not permit him to use Legilimency on a child. It just seemed like such an unnecessary effort to wheedle the information out of her.
His little ruse worked better than he hoped. Athena reacted as if she had been hit with a particularly strong Cheering charm. She not only dried her tears and squealed, 'Thank you, Daddy!' in reply, but then saw fit to enumerate exactly what she wanted. It would have been comical if he wasn't so relieved that she had not decided to ignore him for half a week. He felt a little smug about this. However, since her manner bore an alarming resemblance to that of Pansy Parkinson in the brief period of time when the older girl had held Draco Malfoy's affections, Severus couldn't stop his eyes from rolling heavenwards in a silent plea that the Gods preserve his pocketbook.
If a four-year-old promises to do such damage, what will she be like when she's sixteen?
To distance himself from the headache-inducing excess of rapture that exuded from his daughter, he quickly placed Athena back on Granger's bed, muttered something vague about having an appointment with the Headmistress, and deliberately extricated himself from the scene.
His excuse was partially true. Thanks to his prodigious want of prudence this morning, he was indeed going to have to see Minerva soon and tell her just what a Kneazle's ear of things he had managed to create in a single conversation.
What a poor showing for the Head of Slytherin House. Perhaps I'll aim for a personal point-taking and detention-giving record this afternoon to make up for it. Filch will be delighted.
*****
'You WHAT?' Minerva screeched, when Severus announced the arrangements he had made until such time as he and Miss Granger were relieved of their untimely burden. Even after almost twenty years as colleagues, Severus still thoroughly enjoyed every rise he could get out of the predictable old prude.
'There's no need to shout, Minerva,' he drawled silkily, revelling in her shock and discomfort. 'I fully understand your concern. Obviously the most realistic arrangement would be if Miss Granger and I shared a bed. However, given how inappropriate that would be at this stage of our relationship, I am sure you can see why moving another bed into the room was the best I could do,' he finished, carefully keeping his expression bland as if they were discussing nothing more important than the weather. Since he was now reconciled with the idea, why not milk it for all it was worth?
By the time he reached 'relationship', Minerva's eyes were practically ready to pop out of her skull, and a vein was throbbing in her forehead.
Maybe I should tone down the teasing. The woman is certainly no spring chicken and I do not need to be associated with the death of another Head teacher.
Severus grimaced slightly at that particular thought. Such a black sense of humour was one of the lesser-known, long term side-effects of spending extended periods of time with Death Eaters. He would have to remember this one to tell Lucius. No doubt his old friend would find it hilarious.
'Severus Snape, I fail to see how Hermione Granger is related to this at all. Did you just say you were planning on pursuing a romantic relationship with a STUDENT?!'
Ah.
He had conveniently forgotten that he had yet to explain to Minerva who Athena's mother was.
'May I assume you wish to jump ahead to the second item on the agenda?' Severus asked nonchalantly, still thoroughly enjoying just how tight he had wound his old adversary.
'What item? What agenda are you talking about?' Minerva snapped, clearly in no mood to play.
'Your agenda, Minerva. Did you or did you not send me a note requesting that I provide information for the school records as to what punishment was assigned for the perpetrators of the duel which caused Miss Granger's injury?'
'Get to the point, Severus.'
He grudgingly obeyed.
'In the aftermath of yesterday's incident, Athena inadvertently revealed that Miss Granger is her mother. The eight students involved, excluding Miss Weasley and Miss Lovegood, were threatened with disembowelment with the use of totally harmless, but unusual Potion-making implements. They were also strongly encouraged to sign a cursed parchment somewhat in the nature of the one Miss Granger utilised herself so effectively for Dumbledore's Army.'
Of course, in a nauseatingly sentimental manner, Miss Weasley and Miss Lovegood had proclaimed that they would protect their friend's privacy without being asked.
Minerva's frown deepened with every word.
'Luckily for you,' she answered coldly, 'the Department of Mysteries has provided us with permission to halt news of Athena's travels from spreading any further. I will write in the school records that the matter was handled appropriately.'
Victory. However, Severus was not willing to let go the earlier point. It was time to counter-attack.
'As to your earlier accusation, it must be clear to you now that I did not plan anything. I was informed yesterday by my hellion of a daughter that Miss Granger is her mother, so I was merely referring to being intimate with her at some point in the future. Don't tell me that you need an explanation of the birds and the bees. Or is it that you think so badly of me that you assume I would…what is the expression…"love her then leave her"?' he sneered, actually somewhat hurt by how badly she was taking all this. It really was a stellar performance on his part, only made better by some measure of real emotion.
Minerva sniffed. Clearly Severus learning to read the behaviour of his former teacher had not been a one way exchange. 'Please, spare me your theatrics, Severus. You know that I do not think you an unprincipled cad. However, I still think it completely justified on my part to express some concern that you will be sharing a room with a student for an indefinite span of time. You are not married yet, my boy.'
Touché. Time for a change of tactics.
'Please allow me the use of my discretion in this matter concerning my family, Minerva,' he said firmly. There was no better way to appeal to Gryffindors than to go for the high road. 'I assure you there will be nothing inappropriate about the arrangement. I plan to spend as much time as possible in my office or lab until I can safely deliver Miss Granger back to Gryffindor Tower.'
'I still do not like this, Severus,' she replied sharply, obviously unmoved. 'I demand you provide more justification than simply that you think this arrangement best. Why shouldn't Athena stay with Miss Granger and Miss Weasley in the Tower as she has been doing?'
When he realised his appeal to her 'better' nature had not worked, Severus started absolutely seething with irritation.
Why must the harpy pry into everything? Being a bloody gentleman only goes so far. If I'm going to take a fall for this, Hermione Granger is bloody well coming down with me!
'If you really must know, Headmistress,' he said, infusing his voice with as much scorn and disdain as possible, 'when I told Athena she could not return to her home she started crying. Do you know what it is like to watch your four-year-old daughter cry, Minerva? Of course you don't.'
It was a low blow, but Severus was past caring. Everyone snapped at some point, and it seemed Athena had done what Dumbledore and Voldemort combined never could.
Severus Snape was babbling like a raving lunatic.
He continued, 'Then, your perfect Miss know-it-all Granger promised her we would all be home in the evening. Would you like to be the one who tells the child her family is possibly the most dysfunctional domestic unit in all Wizarding Britain because Daddy will end up unemployed or in Azkaban if he so much as looks sideways at Mummy at any time before June? Do you honestly think I chose this? Athena bloody well made the paintings shake yesterday! As far as I am aware, they are all magically fixed to the thrice-cursed walls. What would you have me do?'
'I want a Wizard's Oath,' Minerva interrupted suddenly, looking positively alarmed at the torrent of semi-abusive snarl pouring from the ordinarily unshakeable Potions Professor's mouth. Severus was a very private man, and it seemed she had quite underestimated just how much pressure he was under at the present time.
Although Severus immediately balked at the idea of swearing to anything, it was enough to distract him from his explosive ranting.
Even he was surprised at the previous moment's outburst. Had he really been feeling all that? What a novelty. In any case, he needed to control himself and turn this back into a win-win situation. He would not lose, and it seemed Minerva did not mean to do so either.
He took a moment to calm himself before answering.
'What sort of Oath?' he queried warily.
'That you will not touch the girl in any way until such time as she's your lawfully wedded wife.'
Severus was hard pressed not to choke.
'I will do no such thing! How in Merlin's name do you expect me to court the girl if I'm not allowed to touch her until we're married?' he retorted scathingly before he could stop himself.
'If your intentions are as pure as you say, you should not mind making an Oath to that effect,' Minerva countered.
Severus decided that wearing her down any further just was not worth his while. He might as well end this as quickly as possible. It could still be more or less on his terms. There was no way in sodding hell he was going to swear another Unbreakable Vow. A standard Oath would be fine. Minerva would be notified if he broke it, and the worst that could happen to him would be yet another black mark in St Peter's book next to his name. It would be nothing the gatekeeper had not seen before.
Drawing his wand, he noticed she was less quick to follow suit.
Interesting, perhaps she was half-bluffing after all.
As their wands touched tips, he intoned, 'I, Severus Snape, do solemnly swear that I will treat Hermione Granger with all due respect while she is under my roof. I will not consummate my relationship with Hermione Granger until said woman is my lawfully wedded wife.'
For a moment the wandtips flared gold, then it was over.
A long moment passed while Minerva looked him appraisingly, as if she had never truly seen him before.
'Do you actually plan to court her?' she asked, demeanour completely changed as she gracefully lifted one eyebrow. Her facial expression was still prim, but he could see the amusement in her eyes.
Severus allowed himself to relax just a little now that they had returned to witty repartee. This was normal, and normal was something his life had totally lacked over the last few days. He was also glad that she was satisfied with the intentionally vague wording of his promise. As to the consummation, he was indifferent. Although he would prefer to do things the right way, he would not hesitate to drag Granger to the Ministry for a licence if it was necessary to ensure Athena was born. He snorted internally at the other part. 'Due' respect indeed.
'Oh no, the plan is to throw her over my shoulder and Apparate her to Gretna Green.'
Minerva did snort at that. 'See you take care of her, Severus,' she said seriously, before they settled in to discuss the finer details of Miss Granger's stay.
Somehow, he knew she wasn't just referring to the next few days.