Hello once again audience! When we left off, Kylie and Luigi were about to die. Maybe. No promises. There I go again.

Canon Fodder

Chapter 10: Whispers

Dear Diary...

It was an hour and a half before I got all the sand out of my hair. What a nuisance.

"What!? We came out here for nothing?!" Luigi said, exasperation filling his voice.

Kylie shook her head. "I guess so." She turned to the sea, and sighed. "I always hated World 3. I...I always hated swimming."

World 3? What on earth is she talking ab- What just touched me?

Luigi looked down and saw a claw grasp his ankles. He was about to kick them off, before they began to pull him into the sand.

He was about to cry for help, but the sand covered his mouth, so all he could force out was a "Mmph!"

"Sorry?" was all Luigi heard before he was completely submerged into the sand. Frantically, he kicked his legs, trying desperately to dislodge the claw that had fastened itself to his foot. Grains of sand forced their way into his mouth. He could no longer breathe. He saw black splotches pass through his vision, growing larger and larger, until they took over. Luigi was unconscious.

Later...

Luigi rubbed his head. It was understandably sore after what he went through. Shaking sand out of his hair, he sat up. The first thing he saw was his cap next to him, which he put on.

It's nice to know whoever kidnapped me had the etiquette to get my cap too, he thought bitterly. Where am I, anyways?

Getting his bearings, Luigi saw that he was in some sort of an underground cave. "Kylie?" he said quietly, as to not alert his kidnapper that he was awake. "Kylie, are you here?"

"Mmm, five more minutes," a voice mumbled from behind Luigi. He turned around and saw her lying on the ground, fidgeting. "It's Saturday, innit?"

"You're awake," another voice whispered, somewhere down the tunnel.

Luigi turned again, and saw a Monty Mole staring at him from behind a rock. "That's good. I was wondering if you hit your head on the way down."

Kylie jolted up and took a stance. "So you're the one who kidnapped us and brought us here against our will?" she asked angrily.

"Shh!" the mole scolded, his voice barely above silence. "I didn't kidnap you, I saved you. From the dangers of the surface. It's safer down here, relatively speaking. Trust me."

"Dangers of the surface? What dangers?" Luigi asked.

"What do you mean, 'relatively speaking'?" Kylie continued.

"Shh! There are dangers down here, too. But you can defend yourself from the dangers down here. You can't defend yourself from the dangers up there. So many dangers...You can't escape them. You can only choose the lesser of two evils," the Monty Mole breathed.

"What's the evil up there?" Luigi asked.

"The sun," the mole said quietly.

Kylie crossed her arms. "That's not dangerous! We've spent a day and a half out in the sun!"

The mole's eyes widened. "How are you still alive?" it said, before covering its mouth. Again, it whispered, "There's dangers down here, too. Dangers...but they are not as bad as the sun."

"Well, if they're not as bad as the sun," Kylie said, turning to Luigi, "how bad can they be?...Wait...No, no, forget I said that-"

"GROOOOOOH!"

Kylie slapped her face.

"Was that...Famous Last Words?" Luigi asked hesitantly.

Kylie simply nodded grimly. "Um...Mr. Monty Mole, what was that roar?"

"Shh! It'll hear you!" the mole whispered. "It has very, very good hearing, the danger. But as long as you can hide, you'll be fine."

Luigi looked up and down the tunnel, and saw absolutely no hiding place in sight. "Where do we hide?"

"Shh! Like this," the mole said, before disappearing into the ground.

Realizing what the Monty Mole meant by 'hide', Luigi's heart sank into his chest as the roar of the 'danger' reverberated through the entire tunnel.

"GROOOOOOH!"

I don't know whether that Monty Mole was trying to help us or not. But he didn't help us. We were now underground, in a completely bare tunnel, trapped with something that can most likely kill us. Thanks a bundle, Monty.

"What do we do, Luigi?" Kylie whispered, taking the Monty Mole's advice.

Luigi gave Kylie a harried look. "You're asking me what to do?"

"You're the one who's been in this kingdom for twenty or so years!"

"You're the one with the creepy, inherent knowledge!"

"I only know so much!"

"So do I!"

"GROOOOOOH!"

I think somewhere along that line of arguing, we forgot that we were supposed to be quiet. I guess that Monty Mole had something going. Because he's probably been living in these tunnels for a while if he hates sun that much, and he's still alive.

"I think we should just run," Kylie said through clenched teeth.

Luigi nodded. "That's probably the best plan."

And they ran. They ran down the tunnel, not wanting to see what was making the scary roar behind them. Running through the tunnels made Luigi feel like a Monty Mole himself, and he wasn't sure if he liked that feeling. Nonetheless, the alternative, which was being mauled by a giant thing didn't sound so hot either, so he kept on running.

Eventually, Kylie and Luigi finally got out of the sand tunnels, and came to something completely different.

Some sort of underground ruins. They still heard the growling behind them, so with no alternative, they ran into the ancient civilization's remains.

"I'd say...this is World 6...material...so we've made...some progress..." Kylie forced out through pants as they ran.

"I think we've gone far enough for now," Luigi said. "Let's stop for a moment. Are you alright, Kylie?"

"Oh...oh, yeah...I'm fine...Just...just give me...a few...haah...a few seconds..." She breathed, before coughing violently. "I'm just...not used...to this...kind...of physical exertion..."

Then she collapsed on the ground and slept.

That caught me by surprise, Diary. I've counted about seven curveballs so far. The sudden sleeping was number seven. Do you think she has narcolepsy? Maybe...But these ruins...Where are they from? I've never seen them, or anything like them. Do you think Kylie being here caused them? Oh, I've got so many questions about that. And how much craziness do you think Mario and I caused just by existing? The entire concept's a little hard to wrap my head around, but I'll try. Now, I'm just waiting for Kylie to wake up.

Fun fact: If you are unconscious for more than two minutes, you are either dead or have a concussion. Luigi was passed out for thirty seconds.