I don't know how long Jason has had me in his arms soothing me but I do know it takes a good while for me to calm down. This pregnancy has had me on an emotional rollercoaster. Jason has not moved an inch even though I have stopped crying. Neither us do I guess we are getting comfortable with the feeling of us together like that without a care in the world. It is like time has stopped when I am in his arms. I guess it would be a good hallmark moment except for the fact that I am about to ruin whatever we just saved of our relationship with my news.
I have no idea how he is going to react to the news but I do know if he leaves me I will be devastated. I am no way ready to raise this baby on my own and I will need his support all the way. Yet, I know he did not sign up for this when we made love that night but I didn't either. I cannot think of a positive reaction that Jason will have when I tell him about the pregnancy. What if he doesn't want any more children? What if he doesn't want any with me?
Jason's humming the lyrics to You're Beautiful by James Blunt. He seems so aloof and content. I feel bad that I am going to interrupt whatever blissful stress free thoughts he is having about tonight with my news.
I take my head up off his toned chest and look up at him. He looks down at me and asks "How are you feeling, Aria?"
"I am feeling much better thanks for asking" I reply.
"You know we do have to talk about the elephant in the room eventually" He says. I know exactly what he is referring to. He is referring to what exactly is this between us." But we can do it when you are feeling better. I just want to say something first. I can't live without you or even try to anymore because I would be me lying to myself. That life is worth living without you and I refuse to do that again because that's no way to live as I would just be me existing not living. I want you to be more than just a friend I want you to be my girlfriend, my fiancée or my wife. However I will wait until you are ready for a relationship"
Again Jason's words stun me. He is so considering, kind and selfless it hurts. I have fantasied and dreamt about this moment for so long. It is everything I have ever wanted to hear. My impulse is to say yes right off the bat but then I remember I have not told him about the baby. A baby changes everything in a relationship and I do not want him to blindly make his choice. Blind choices tend to lead to resentment later in a relationship. He is waiting for a response and I shall give him one.
"Jason before I answer you, there is something life changing I need to tell you. If the offer still stands after I tell you then I will answer you" I say. Jason's forehead is now furrowed probably trying to figure out what on earth I have to tell him that is so vital and life changing. I pull away from the embrace and stand directly in front of him as I want to see his reaction clearly. He is holding onto my hand with his both fingers interlaced. My heart begins to race and I can feel the beginning of stress sweat.
"Jason, I am pregnant with your baby" I blurt out. I watch as shock registers on his face followed by some other indescribable emotions but none of anger or resent come across his eyes or face. He lets out a relieved sigh. He still holds my hand and doesn't let go. Instead he gives me a reaffirming squeeze and asks, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I went to the doctor two weeks ago and had a blood test performed I am indeed 13-14 weeks pregnant" I say "I know this is sudden and you will need time to think but I want you to know I am keeping this baby". I am now looking to the floor because I am dreading what he is going to say. It takes him some time to formulate a response.
"Well, this is surprising but I want you to know that I will be there for you. I love you and our baby doesn't change how I feel about you at all. In whatever there for you in any way you want me to be" He says "You are not alone, we made this baby and I want to be involved in my child's life. Wait you have known for two weeks and kept this to yourself?"
I exhale sharply. I did not realize I had been holding my breath until now. Jason now has his hands around my barely visible tummy feels it and then pulls me into a hug. The use of his words my and ours give me some reassurance at least he did not call our baby a thing like Spencer did when I told her about Jon.
"Yes because I was so scared and I didn't know what to do" I say panicking. "What are we going to do Jason, our life situation is less than ideal. I mean we are not even dating can you imagine what people will say when this news gets out"
"Aria, together we are going to raise our child despite whatever our situation is. We can move in together if that is what you want and as for the people of rosewood they will get over it as they are always quick to judge. Look at me I am a living example of their bad critiques turning out to be positive despite the odds" Jason declares. "You kept this to yourself for two weeks that must have been torturous Aria, I am sorry you had to go through that alone"
If it is one thing Jason does have a way with words. It is no doubt why he is a successful lawyer. His little speech made me feel as if anything was possible as if this pregnancy was going to be a piece of cake. I smile to him reassuringly letting me know I believe his words. Despite both of us knowing this is not going to be easy.
He pulls me back into embrace and that's when I say "It is okay, I am not alone anymore I have you. Jason I have an OBGYN appointment for 12 pm on Thursday, I was just wondering if you wanted to come"
"I would not miss it for the world" He says with joy in his eyes and I think maybe this once life will not spend its time opposing me. I feel so relieved that he knows .It is like all the clouds have parted from my life and out shines sunshine. Now all I have to do is tell the rest of my friends i.e. Spencer, Hanna & Emily.
That should be a joy especially telling Spencer.
A/N: Reviews are love..so please leave one...Also the next chapter will be from Jason's point of view...
