Slim approached his cohorts standing by the orange stand. The owner of the establishment paid no mind to the harmless 'criminals.' Junior and Bossman both looked a little down. When the Boss noticed his taller comrade arrive, he mustered as much hope as he could and said, "Did ya commit a crime, Slim?"
He slowly nodded his head 'no.'
The leader let out a depressed sigh. "Well boys, we had a good run, but I think we should quit the super-villain business."
Junior looked up. "But where're we gonna go, Boss?"
Bossman looked out in the distance with determination. "Wherever the wind takes us..."
Slim blinked. "Wha?"
The Boss explained to his slow associate. "Well, we just let the wind carry us. We are germs, schtupid."
Junior looked up at Slim with annoyance. "Yeah schtupid!"
The Amoeba Boys, all together, just let go of the weight that they have used to ground them to the Earth. And soon enough, the slight breeze carried the protozoa through the streets as they slowly ascended higher and higher. The boys all bore depressed frowns.
The Boss sighed, "So long, Townsville! Your most feared criminals are leaving forever! The town will be a safer place from now on!"
The citizens below paid no attention to the germs drifting eight feet from the ground going 0.5 miles per hour. As the boys floated down the street, guided by the gentle summer breeze, three police cars up ahead placed a blockade in the middle of the road, thus creating traffic. When the Amoeba Boys were ten feet away, all fourteen present guards grew their handguns and the chief of police pulled out a megaphone.
"Amoeba Boys!" He barked into the device. "Get down on the ground and raise your, uh, tentacles in the air or whatever!"
Obediently, the guys shifted their weight and landed firmly on the deserted street eight feet away from the squad, puzzled looks were pasted across their faces.
The chief continued, "Now approach us slowly and prepared to be taken into custody!"
After slithering for about two feet, the gears suddenly turned in the Bossman's head. "Hey, uh, what'd we do? Exactly?" He stopped, and the other amoebas ceased as well.
The overworked chief huffed angrily into the megaphone. What was left of his silvery hair was drooping over his wrinkly, sweaty, forehead.
"Bossman! You are under arrest for the subway bombing conspiracy! We were only going to pay attention to the monkey and ignore you 'cause you're an idiot."
The large organism gritted his teeth. "Hey!"
The chief continued, "But since the monkey ran out of town, you're the only one we could shift the blame to!"
A look of pure joy spread across the Boss's face. "Does that mean I'ma criminal?"
The chief pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Whadda you think, jackass?"
"Hey!" Junior squeaked. "What about me?"
"Junior, alias 'Tiny'," He growled with detest. "You are wanted for harassment."
Junior grinned. "All right!" He jumped up to eye level with Bossman and the two gave an awkward 'Amoeba High Five.' He splatted on the ground and returned to his normal form, still smiling. He was overcome with happiness, the Boss seemed like he finally respected the humble microorganism.
Slim's jello lip trembled. "But what about-"
"SKINNY SLIM!" The chief screamed into the megaphone, which was unnecessary at this point since the Amoeba Boys were only six feet away from the first cop, who was on one knee and still had his gun drawn on the boys.
"You are under arrest for breaking and entering! Nobody, and I mean NOBODY has ever penetrated the Townsville National Bank's defenses! You sir, are a criminal mastermind!"
Skinny Slim gave a wobbly smile. "Yeah..." He muttered. People thought he was a mastermind? That's what he's always asked for.
The Boys were just about to burst with thanks from the cops. The moment they took a sudden step forward, the chief took it as an act of assault. "FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!"
The cops all opened fire on the harmless boys. Their soft bodies were being shredded apart by hot lead. But it obviously didn't affect them in the slightest. They were still smiling as the bullets passed right through their cytoplasm. But the boys sunk low to the ground, dazed by how sudden their dreams came true.
The chief approached the 'defeated' parasites with a Desert Eagle drawn.
"Chief, get back! They're dangerous!" An average blue-collared cop begged.
The chief turned his head, looking at the officer over his glasses. "I know what I'm doing, stand down."
He towered over Bossman, whose eyes groggily shifted into the path of the chief's gaze. He aimed the gun he held in one hand at what would be the leader's forehead. The 'Over-The-Top meter' was off the charts.
He squeezed the trigger of his powerful handgun, blowing a hole through the Boss's head. He was still awake, looking into the man's eyes.
The aged chief turned towards the direction of his squad. "Men! Get these scum of the Earth to jail!" He barked.
One cop opened up the backseat of a door as six more approached the boys. But as soon as they heard the click of the door opening, the Boys bolted into the backseat of the police cruiser.
Bossman leaned over his friends and excitedly said, "Come on! Come on! Send us to jail!"
"Yeah, jail!" Junior mimicked.
The officers shrugged and they all piled into their cars. Two sat in the front of the Amoeba's through the steel gate separating them. The boys seemed pretty satisfied with themselves.
Bossman gave a relaxed sigh and closed his eyes. Junior sitting in the middle shook with anxiety. Slim was looking out his window on the far left.
With his eyes still closed, Bossman spoke. "Well boys, we did it. We really made this town look pretty schtupid for underestimatin' us. They turned a blind eye, and we took 'em by surprise. I couldn't have done it without you two. And I must say," He looked to his left at his comrades, who looked at their leader with smiles. "I wouldn't have it any other way."
Junior smiled warmly and Slim said in a shaky voice, "Wow...thanks Boss."
The Boss lifted his grey fedora. "Here guys, I swiped this while waitin' for you two." From his hat, he pulled out an orange.
He seemed two have somehow peeled it, as it appeared to be picked of any skin. It took the incompetent criminal several seconds to remember how to divide. But he got it, he split it into three nearly equal sections but one had an extra slice. He handed that one to Junior.
The tiny amoeba gently held it with awe. "Boss, I-I don't know how ta thank you."
The ringleader waved a hand-like proboscis in dismissal. "Nah, take it. You earned it. No bombing could ever top harassment."
The three snacked on their fruit before arriving to prison.
The Boys had their pictures taken, cytoplasm samples were taken rather than fingerprints, and they weren't given orange prison suits for obvious reasons. But their fedoras were confiscated and replaced with exact replicas of the old ones, but colored a bright orange.
They all stood in their cell, seeming beyond blithe. They have unintentionally achieved their life goals, but they didn't see it that way.
Bossman looked through the rusty bars, smiling. "We did it boys...we did it." He whispered.