Ron POV

I faced the fetus-Voldemort.

"Voldemort," I grinned with Lavender's limp body in hand.

"Ronald, tell me everything," Voldemort said licking his lips.

Harry POV

Hermione's arms wrapped around me as we followed a teacup of Lavender's, it had a tracking spell on it. We whizzed through the dark sky hoping to find her soon. It seemed like hours had gone by, my arms had gone numb from holding on.

"H-harry?" Hermione called over the wind, "We've been searching for hours, perhaps we should rest," I agreed and we made camp, well Hermione did with quick magic.

"What will Dumbledore say?" Hermione muttered, "I don't care! We need to find Lav!"

"Okay 'mione, it'll be okay," I promised. We sat quietly together in the large wall tent.

"Harry I'm so sorry I drug you out here," she sighed.

"No! Don't be! I couldn't have let you go by yourself," I said taken aback.

"It's just-" she stopped abruptly when we heard a strange rustling noise from Hermione's backpack.

"Oh no," Hermione cried and ripped open her backpack, "I knew it!" A little furry head popped out.

"Bandit?" I asked, "how did he…?"

"The rose quartz was in there, he must've snuck in there," she giggled.

"Well good thing we didn't leave him to his own devices in my room," I shrugged and picked up the furry little guy. He squirmed around and nibbled my ear. I only wished Lavender was safe so we could all be home happy. Why did everything have to happen like this?

"Stop, what is that?" Hermione pointed to the ground below us. I squinted through the trees until I noticed something bright red. Ron? I swerved around and landed with grace. Not Ron.

"Is that his-"

"Hair?" Hermione finished.

"Dear Lord what the hell?" I roared.

"Harry?" Hermione asked.

"He's joined Voldemort onto the Bald side," I groaned. Hermione looked at me in confusion.

"The what side?"

"To be a true and not-so-pure death eater you must shave your head," I explained, "He-"

"Uh, uh, uh, give it to me Snape!" A familiar voice screeched overhead.

"Ginny!?" Hermione cried.

"10 points for Gryffindor!" Snape shouted. We looked up to the tree above us and saw Ginny thrusting her hips over Snape's now flaccid dick. His balls sagged over the branches nearly touching our heads.

"What the fuck Snape?" Voldemort's voice came in, "Brotha tha not cool,"

"My lord, anything for the young 'pus,"

"Hermione!" I yelped pulling her back.

"Dielus rightnowus!" Hermione cried as a stream of blue burst from her wand. Voldemort fell, his feet flying into the air. Ginny and Snape each turned bats then began humping wildly. But I wasn't affected by the curse.

"Is he dead?" I asked.

"Yeah, we're safe now-"

Ron POV

"I wouldn't be so sure," I crowed.

"Ron!" Hermione, the slut, growled.

"Slutbag," I sneered before muttering a spell causing Harry to sleep and Hermione to get horny.

"Oh God Ron what do you want? What did you do to Harry?"

"Hermione are you wet?"

"Excuse me?" she snapped, "I'd get back if I were you baldy!"

"Get down on your knees," I commanded.

"Shut the hell up," I smiled at her fire. It would be fun to put out.

"Bendus overus!" I laughed. The brown haired beauty was spun around and forced to bend at my will. She snarled at me.

"Don't you dare try anything you peniseless jerk,"

"Spread yourself," I said with a wolfish grin.

"Kill yourself," She mocked.

"Go with the hard way then," I shrugged. My hands slowly run up her thighs then roughly spread them apart.

"Stop it!" She cried unable to move.

"NO!" I snarled before ripping her panties away.

"RON I SWEAR-" I balled her panties and stuffed them into her mouth. I plunged my tongue into her soft wet pussy. I could heard her cries of pleasure.

"You love that don't you, slut," I smiled against her love flaps. I grabbed my strap on dildo, 12 inches in size, and slammed into her. She screamed as I mercilessly rammed her. Tears of pleasure ran down her cheeks as out skin cylided.

"Harry couldn't give you this!" I laughed, "You love me inside of your sweet little pussy," I slowed until I was barely moving. I had learned this move from 50 shades of Rowling.

"Do you want more?" Hermione did nothing but I could feel her needy tremble, "Answer me with a nod," She still did nothing.

"Well alright-" Hermione backed into my dick giving up her stance. She pulsed against me trying to get closer inside of her. I slapped her ass raw, she moaned through the fabric in her mouth.

"Ron I hate you!" She cried once she had spat out the underwear.

"Then why are you having so much fun-" Hermione stood and punched me in the throat.

"Spells don't last forever," She snarled before smashing my head with a rock. I was dead. Being dead felt like drinking sperm.

Hermione POV

"Harry wake up!" I called to him. His green eyes fluttered.

"Hermione?" He croaked.

"I save us, we're okay," I whispered. I dipped my head down and caught his lips. Shivers run up and down our bodies under we were connected.

"I love Hermione Granger,"

"I love you more Harry Potter,"