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After such a long time, Gray wonders why things ended up this way.

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10. Why?

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Gray wasn't an affectionate person. Everyone knew that about him. He also wasn't the type of person who stayed in long lasting relationships. And if he did, which was shocking, he kept those relationships a secret.

That's why he had no idea how he ended up in some sort of secret relationships for the past five years with Juvia Lockser.

At first, she had shown up out of nowhere into Fairy Tail headquarters. He had recognized her from a previous fight they'd had with a past enemy. She had been assigned as one of the FBI members in the unit. Gray had to give it to her, she was badass. Sadly, she had become attached to Gray, and Gray wasn't too happy about it. He rarely showed any type of attachment to his friends he had known for a long time, so when Juvia had thrown herself with her big heart eyes, he had rejected her flatly.

Still, it wasn't long before she had made her way into his life. Getting herself involved into life matters of him. She helped him rescue his father and almost died for him.

Gray had never had anyone care that much for him. She was an enigma he couldn't decipher; no matter how many times he pushed, she came running back. No matter how many hurtful things he said, she would forgive him without blinking an eye and would be back at his side; no questions asked.

Before he knew it, one night out of impulse after a mission, he had kissed her. He didn't know who was more shocked; him or her. He was sure she would've passed out it he hadn't been holding her up. He wasn't sure why he had kissed her, or why he had pushed her into his room and made hot love to her all for the rest of the night.

He had tried and convince her it was a one night thing. He expected her to scream, yell and even punch him like many past girls had done to him.

"It's okay," she had said with a smile on her face. "Juvia enjoyed the night too. There's no reason to make things awkward."

Gray had been astounded with her response, and true to her word, Juvia acted like nothing had happened between them. She would still flirt with him boundlessly, act jealous around 'love rivals,' and even kept calling him 'Gray-sama.' She never overstepped her bounds and never brought up that night. Gray wasn't sure why it bothered him so much and why it had been him to have to bring up the night first.

"I don't understand why you act like nothing happened," Gray said to her as they drove back from a recent mission.

Juvia had turned her head to the side and looked at him with genuine confusion. "Well, Gray-sama said to act like nothing happened, and that's what Juvia did."

A strong feeling overwhelmed him as he looked at her innocent face and how sincere she was being. Gray slammed his fist against the steering wheel in irritation and swerved out of the road. He put the car in park and turned to Juvia. "Godammit, Juvia."

He kissed her and that's how that night was repeated all over again, but this time it didn't stop there. It happened almost any time they were alone. Gray wasn't sure why, but something about Juvia drove him crazy and it kept pulling him towards her.

Before he knew it, a year had gone by and they had made a deal to stay exclusive to each other. Gray didn't like the thought of Juvia sleeping with others. Thankfully, she agreed and didn't question him about it. It had been the best year by far in his life. Having Juvia around was like having his own personal sun. It was always bright and shiny.

Even so, Gray knew he was being a sick bastard by keeping her at arms away. He could sleep with her whenever he wanted, but he wouldn't open his heart to her. He just couldn't. Juvia was never opposed, she never asked more than he could give, and before he knew it, five years had gone by.

He thought either one would eventually get tired of one another and leave their pact, but Juvia was his oasis and he was in a desert. He always wanted her, and she always wanted him. No matter what he did, she always came back.

That's why, when everyone had gathered around at a bar for Fairy Tail's fiftieth anniversary, Gray wasn't sure why Juvia had thrown her drink at him and had run out of the bar.

"Juvia!" He yelled as he ran after her. Even in a tight small blue dress and high heels at night, she was hella fast. "Stop!"

"Don't follow Juvia!" she yelled back.

Gray reached forward and pulled her back by the arm. He was ready to ask her what the hell had been her problem when she had thrown that drink at him, but his words were cut short when he took a good look at her face. Her eyes were full of tears, her makeup was ruined and her eyes weren't like anything he had ever seen. She was looking at him in so much hate, disgust and betrayal.

"Juvia?" Gray said.

Juvia pulled her arm out of his grasp. "Leave Juvia alone!"

"What is going on?" Gray said confused. "Why are you like this?"

"Gray-sama doesn't know," Juvia laughed dryly. "You never know."

"I would know if you told me what the fuck was going on," Gray refuted back.

"Everything is going wrong!" Juvia ran her hands through her hair. "It's been going on for years! Juvia always thought that eventually Gray-sama would open his heart to Juvia, but the more the time goes, the more he closes his heart."

"We made a pact—"

"—forget the fucking pact for one second!" Juvia yelled. Gray took a step back. He wasn't used to Juvia raising her voice. "Gray-sama has no right! In there when they asked him if Gray-sama was seeing anyone, Juvia thought, she thought, after five years, maybe, just maybe he would finally admit it, but no. Gray-sama keeps denying our relationship infront of all our friends, when they know we've been seeing each other for years! They simply turned a blind eye out of respect for Gray-sama!"

"Juvia…"Gray started, but she glared at him.

"No, let me finish," she jabbed her thumb into his chest. "So, if you're not seeing anyone Gray-sama, he doesn't have a right to go and punch some stranger when he dances with Juvia. Gray-sama even had the audacity to tell him, 'don't touch what's mine!' Does Gray-sama know how stupid and macho that sounds?"

"He has his hands all over you!" Gray said back angrily.

"And if Gray-sama would've waited five more seconds he would've listened to Juvia tell the guy that she was in a relationship, which in reality makes no sense! Gray-sama is in no relationship, so who the hell is Juvia in a relationship with? Gray-sama's shadow?"

"Juvia," Gray started. "Look, you knew the moment you got into this pact with me what kind of person I was."

"Yes," Juvia nodded her head in mockery. "Yes, Juvia knew the type of person she had fallen in love and even if she was delusional enough to agree to some stupid pact, she knew it was all worth it if it was going to be to the man she had fallen in love with. The man who put others before him, the one who showed her the sun when she was surrounded by rain." Juvia's tears kept flowing out of her and Gray wanted nothing more than to wipe them away, but he fisted his hands and kept them to his side.

"The man Juvia fell in love with would never make others go through pain or suffering, and at first, Gray-sama did that for Juvia. The first year was amazing, but it was like after it became too real for him, after we made the pact, he pulled away, and it was like we were all back to square one or even worse, it was like we were strangers all over again!" Juvia huffed as she regained her breath. "After that, it was like Gray-sama was the one who brought Juvia her rain. She didn't know what man he had turned into, but it wasn't her Gray-sama from five years ago."

Gray felt his heart dump into his stomach at her words. His hands on either side of him began to tremble.

"He was what brought pain every time she breathed. She was so close to him, yet so far." Juvia threw Gray's jacket she had been wearing all through the party on the ground. "It was like he was torturing her. Every time she thought she had made progress, he would pull back entirely." She shook her head. "You know what's worse of it all?" She looked at him straight into the eyes and Gray knew he had screwed up big time. "Gray-sama said Juvia was his. But ownerships goes both ways, and Gray-sama has never been Juvia's."

Gray watched as she turned around and walked away, and he didn't know why—no, he did know why he didn't follow her. Juvia was completely right. He had no right to run after her.

What had he done?