NEN AND DAVE
by Silver Neko
A more unlikely pair you could not get. These two love to make Abe's life a living hell, and Nen especially is always scheming in this comical story.
It was about 4 years before Abe found out that his race was pie filling. In a forest near a small valley, there was a circle of tall tall trees (2 miles high!) up in these trees was a fancy looking shack, carved all over with little symbols and figures. In it, lived a creature not from Oddworld. A creature who shot any thing that might be a threat to her home...
Chapter 1
One day, a small gang of Mudokons were passing through this forest. "I'm cold!" complained one. "Ewww! Its all wet here!" said another. "I'm staaaarrving!" said one who was hanging back behind the group. He said it loud enough for someone high up in the tree's to hear. The leader stopped to rest a minute. Suddenly five arrows were sticking out of his back. He fell dead on the ground. "Wha-" began one Mudokon before he was hit with 5 arrows in his spine. The others began to run, but were all taking down. All but one who had just stood there with his mouth hanging open. Then, Siiiiipt! An arrow went through his foot, trapping him to the ground. A figure leapt from the trees and landed near the trapped Mudokon (whose name was Dave). Dave gasped at the sight of this... this... thingy. It was like a Mudokon but not. It was light purple and had a beak. It had nothing on its head. It was much thinner then a Mudokon and Dave thought he could of been able to kick its butt, if it weren't for that bow and arrows, and the large green clear blade it had just pulled out.
The weirdo came up to him slowly, preparing to drive the knife into to Dave's jugular vein. Dave decided to compromise. "AAAA! Please have mercy! I'll do any thing you want! Don't kill meeee! I'll be your slave for life!" he offered. The purple thing stopped and thought for a sec. Dave held his breath. "Ok" the purple thing said. It bent down and yanked the arrow out off Dave's foot...
Chapter 2
The purple thing led Dave (after bandaging up his foot) to the circle of trees. "Ok, I'm Nen, a Sy-hoon. You can call me Greatest of Goddesses. THAT is fire wood. YOU carry it up to OUR house." She said pointing to the wood, then upwards. "What house?" asked Dave. "The house 2 MILES up there!" said Nen pointing up again. "Uuuuuhhhh..." "DO IT!" raged Nen as she put her hand on the hilt of her blade. Dave walked over to the wood and struggled to pick up a log. After 5 minutes of gasping and wheezing, Nen slapped her head and cried, "WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? IT'S JUST ONE DAMN LOG!" she howled. "But it's heavy, and I'm hungry!" Dave whined. "Fine... I ll make dinner... then I train you!"
Nen and Dave began climbing up the trees to the shack. Nen looked down and saw that Dave was practically still on the ground. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" she demanded. "It's soooo high!" whined Dave. Nen calmly fitted an arrow into her bow. "AAAA! I'm coming!" Dave said and scooted up the tree. When they reached the top, Nen showed Dave around. "Living room," she said pointing at the room they were in. "MY room, YOUR room, kitchen-" "Where's da bathroom?" interrupted Dave. "If you have to wiz, you climb back down and find a bush. When I say you smell bad, you go find a pond or river and then rub your self with flowers." she said quickly. "Uggg!" said Dave. Nen went into the small room she claimed was the kitchen. "Food!" cheered Dave sticking his head in the doorway. An hour later, Nen set down two dishes of food on her small short table. "What's this?" asked Dave poking at the yellow food. "These are boiled Foxfire nuts I had imported from Tin" she said as she stuck one in her mouth and chewed. "Who's Tin?" "He and every other Sy-hoon on this planet live in a city we made out of our crashed ship out in the middle of some desert." She replied. "Oh... OWWW!" said Dave as he (tried) to take a bite out of the nut. "Its so hard I cant eat it!" he moaned. "Oh great! I boiled them so that they'd be soft enough for you to eat!" said Nen. She crushed another Nut in her beak. "I have some dried Scrab meat. You can eat that right?" she asked as she got up and went into the kitchen. "Oooo! Yeah!" grinned Dave as he rubbed his hands together...
Chapter 3
It was the next morning. Nen had woken Dave up at 4 in the morning to train him. "Ok, I'm taking some of MY time to train YOU so you can be strong enough to pick up more then just logs." Nen said. Dave yawned. "Ok, I have found the best way to toughen up the arms is to hit stuff. So hit me." Nen said. "Are you sure?" asked Dave nervously. "YES! Give me your best shot!" You wont get angry?" "NO!" "All right..." with that, Dave pulled back his arm and punched Nen in the gut. Nen didn't even flinch. Dave did. "OOOOWWWWWW! Your stomachs hard!" Dave blew on his throbbing hand. Nen rolled her eyes. "How about hitting a tree? That should be softer." she said sarcastically. After 2 hours of tree hitting, Nen said, "Time for a jog!" "Yea..." mumbled Dave. And so they jogged, for 50 miles. "Ahhhggggg-" Dave dropped to the ground once Nen said they were done jogging. By that time, the sun was high in the sky. "Hot? Here's a lake, take a dip." said Nen pointing to the body of water. Dave dragged himself to the water and jumped in. Then jumped out half frozen. "YAAAAAAA! Cold! Coldcoldcoldcold!" he said as he jumped around trying to get warm. "Hmmmmmm, that's odd, you were just burning hot and too tired to move, glad to see you recovered. Let's continue." said Nen.
It was a few days later. Nen was dragging home a Scrab corpse. She had left Dave home to watch the place (and take a bath). She had finally trusted him to be alone since he was to scared to climb down with out her help. But at least he had finally gotten strong enough to pick up a log and climb up a tree with it. Nen climbed up the trees that held her home and went through the Door. "I'm home!" she called. No one answered back. Nen checked every room but could not find Dave. Her first emotion was not rage... but sadness. She suddenly felt so alone with out Dave's stupid questions and whining. THEN she felt rage. "That lying little-" she suddenly heard a grunt as some one climbed through the door. "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!" Nen howled at Dave. "Uhhhh, taking... the bath you told me to take?" he said. "Oooohhhh" the anger Nen had felt instantly died. Of course that's why he would go outside, he would never consider leaving me! She thought to herself. Then she looked at his hands. "YOU LIAR!" She yelled. Dave's hands were caked with dirt. "WHAT-WERE-YOU-DOING?" She asked calmly as she slowly pulled Dave's pony tail out of his scalp. "Eeeeeee! Just just, aaahhh! Burying the others!" Dave spat out. "What others?" Nen demanded. "The other Mudokons I was with..." Dave said quietly. Nen let go of Dave's head. For a long time they said nothing. Nen was silently going through waves of guilt while Dave was silently freaking out at what Nen was going to do to him. "Just forget it" Nen said and went into her room, shutting the curtain behind her...
Chapter 4
"Uhhhh Nen... I made dinner... again." Dave said as he peeked into Nen's room. "Thanks... I'm not hungry." Nen replied from the darkness. Dave walked back to the table and put away Nen's plate, again. For the past 4 days Nen had shut herself up in her room. Dave sat down at the table and stared at his food: ground up Foxfire berries. Nen had finally figured out how to make them edible for Dave. Dave stuffed himself but felt empty. When He had first met Nen he had been terrified. Then when she had spared him, he had felt depressed and thought he would be treated like a slave. But Nen had always treated him like a student more then a slave. He had never really liked the Mudokons that he always travelled with. He hated having to walk all over just because the Glukkons were always destroying the places they were living in. But when he had seen his fellow travellers bodies filled with arrows and the twisted looks of terror on their faces, he felt bad for them. He had been having nightmares about them. So, one day when Nen had gone out for some fresh meat, Dave had snuck out and buried the bodies of his companions, only to come home late and have Nen howl at him. Dave thought it was all over, but when he had told Nen what he had done, she had got this strange look on her face and told him to forget it. That's when she went to her room and hadn't come out since (except to go to the bathroom) "I wish she would come back out and..." he couldn't think of any thing. All he knew was that he could not get rid of this emptiness that tore away at his soul.
Chapter 5
(Next day) Dave was sitting at the table. He had just finished breakfast. He was trying to think of a good excuse to get Nen to come out. Suddenly he heard the sound of some one climbing up the trees. Dave panicked. Without thinking, he grabbed Nen's green blade that had been hanging on the wall and ran over to the door. He looked down to see a Sy-hoon carrying a box up the tree. The Sy-hoon looked up and saw Dave... then freaked. "YAAAAAAAHHH!" It gasped and loss its grip on the tree. Gravity and the box pulled it to the ground (2 miles down!) "NEEEEEEENNN!" Dave cried. 20 Minutes later...
Nen had dragged the stranger back up to the house. "DAVE!" She screeched. "What?" "Do you know WHO this is?" she growled. Dave shook his head. "This is Sky! He brings me supplies every month! And YOU nearly killed him!" Sky groaned and opened his eyes. "Who the heck is that?" he demanded pointing at Dave. "My roommate, Dave. A Mudokon." Nen replied. "I know what Mudokons are." Sky shot back. "Here's your food and other stuff, I should be going-" "But you juuuussst got here! And you fell from a very very high tree! You need a rest!" Nen said. "No I-" "CRACK!" a Sickening crack came from Sky's leg. "Kuso!" cursed Sky. "NOW you must stay!" Nen cheered. "I'll make din din!" with that, she turned and went into the kitchen. Now there's something you should know about Sky. He is the best friend of Tin. And every Sy-hoon female on Oddworld has the hots for him (including Nen!). That night...
"That was a good Meal Nen, I'm glad to see living out here has improved your cooking skills." Sky said as he put away the dishes. "Oh no you don't!" said Nen as she pulled him back to the Living room. "I'LL put away the dishes, YOU have a broken foot!" "I can put them away Nen." offered Dave. "Uhhhh... no Dave. How about you go to bed and I'll clean up. Ok?" Nen said quickly. "Oookkkayyy..." Dave said slowly as he walked to his room. Later that night...
Nen laid out some blankets on the living room floor. "Thanks Nen, I can take it from here. Goodnight." said Sky nervously. Nen did not leave. Nen had a strange glint in her eyes. "Oooohhhhh noooo, Nen... don't even think about it... NO!" Nen leapt at Sky and pulled him in to a bear hug. "Your aaalllll mine now!" she cooed. "Gaaa! Stop!" Sky screeched as Nen attempted to kiss him (YES Sy-hoons can kiss. Its a bit different than us but they CAN). "What are you two doing?" Dave asked from the door way of his room. Nen shoved Sky away from her. "Uuuuhhhhh... CPR! Sky was choking!" Nen said with an embarrassed look on her face. "I'm afraid I have to go now! Thanks for (almost) every thing!" Sky said quickly as he scooted out the door into the night. Nen just stood there looking embarrassed. "Soooo Nen, what were you REALLY doing?" Dave demanded (he could sense that Nen was lying, but he really didn't know what they had been doing) "Ever hear of the birds and the bees?" Nen said casually. "Whaaa?" Dave said with an confused look on his face. "Love? You KNOW!" Nen said, thinking that Dave was being dumb on purpose. "Love? Like how I love to eat or sleep?" "NOOOO!" Nen howled in annoyance. "When a male loves a female! LOVE!" Dave just stared with a blank face. "Uuuugggg! I'm too tired, I'll tell you tomorrow." she mumbled...
Chapter 6
It was the next morning. Nen was in a bad mood because she had missed her big chance with Sky. "What about the birds and bugs?" Dave said out of nowhere. Nen let her head hit the table with a thunk. "Ok, This is going to get ugly." Nen said under her breath. She raised her head at looked strait at Dave. "Ok, who were your parents?" she demanded. "Mom? Her name was Sam" "WHAT KIND OF NAME FOR A FEMALE IS SAM?!" Nen cried. "I like it! I wish I could of been named Sam" Dave said dreamily. "What ever, who was your dad?" Nen sighed. Dave just stared. "Daaaaadd... the guy who... you know!" Nen said in frustration. Dave just shrugged. Nen let her head hit the table again...
Some day many months later...
Nen and Dave had just had a little run in with a heard of wild Scrabs. They got away, but not clean. They were up in a tree waiting for the last of the herd to go out of sight. "Oh good! We are all covered in our dried up sweat, blood and some dirt." Nen said Sarcastically. "Can we go home now?" Dave asked. "NO! We are going to find a pond or river and TAKE A BATH!" Nen yelled. They climbed down the tree and it wasn't long before they found a small quiet pond in the middle of the forest. "Ok, I'm going first. YOU get behind that tree until its your turn." Nen said as she crushed some flowers on a rock to make soap. "Why cant we just go in together?" Dave demanded. "EVER HEAR OF PRIVACY?" Nen asked. "Uuuuhhhh... Nope!" Dave said with a shrug. "There's things I have that YOU don't have that YOU can't see or you will die!" Nen said as she shoved him towards the Trees. "AND DON'T PEEK!" "At what?" "AAAAAAGGGGG!"
Nen took off the rough old brown Tunic she usually wore. Now of course they say that curiosity killed the cat (or Mudokon) and Dave was no exception. He wanted to know what Nen was so uptight about. So he quietly snuck out from behind the tree toward the pond (as you know Mudokons are very good a tiptoeing around with out a sound!) Nen was still in sitting down in the water, rubbing her self with mashed up flowers. Dave snuck closer and closer. He couldn't see any thing strange (remember Sy-hoons don't have, ahem, boobs) He was soon so close that he could lean over and look down at her. Still nothing odd (no pun intended). Then the lose dirt of the ponds shore gave away to his weight and he fell on top of Nen. Nen was dazed for a moment, then MAD. She stood up in the water and howled at Dave, "YOU FREAK! YOU ALMOST DROWNED ME!" Dave popped his head of the water. He was not listening to Nen. He was getting an eye full. Nen noticed his Gaze and screeched. "GET BACK BEHIND THOSE TREE'S YOU PERVERT!" Dave pulled his soggy dripping wet self out of the water and started to walk away. He grumbled, "I didn't see anything special-OW!" Nen heard that and threw a rock at the back of his head...
Chapter 7
"Kuso!" Nen said as she looked in the large box she called the pantry and saw that they were out of Foxfire nuts. "What's Kuso mean Nen? You say it all the time." Dave asked from the other room as he attempted to make an arrow for the bow Nen made for him. "It means crap!" Nen, slamming the lid to the box down. Nen paused for a moment, they had plenty of food and nothing to do, sooooo...
"How about I teach you my language?" Nen said as she walked into the living room. "Oooookaaayyy..." Dave said uncertainly. "I start with curse words because its funny when you call some one a wuss and they don't know you did!" Nen grinned. "Baka means idiot, Yamero means to piss off, Chikusoo means damn it and Shimatta means up yours! Got it?" "N-" "Good!" Nen interrupted. "Gomen means sorry, Sugoi means cool, Hie means yes and Iie means no. And Guess what Ore means?" "I have no idea Nen" "I'll tell you one thing about it, never say it to your boss!" Nen said with a wink.
Dave considered these words for a while, then asked Nen a very important question, "Nen... how do you say friend?" "Tomodachi" Nen answered. Dave said this word slowly so that he could remember it. "How do you say Slave?" he asked again. "Boku" Nen said. Dave took a deep breath and said, "Nen... am I your Boku... or your Tomodachi?" Nen thought about this. "TOMODACHI!" She cried into Dave's face. Dave fainted...
Chapter 8
4 years later...
It was a fine day in the little valley where Abe and his followers lived. Abe was (as usual) trying to hide from his huge fan club. He was currently hiding behind Alf's Tea place. He felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to see a Mudokon holding a large box. "Uh, I made this for you Abe. It should be tasty. Bye!" He said while giggling. With that, the Mudokon thrust the package into Abe's hands and ran like the wind. "Oooo" said Abe as he opened the box. Inside was a Scrab cake. "Wow! I haven't had one of these in a long time!" he gasped. He took a bite out of it. He chewed it slowly, savouring the taste. Then he looked at where he had taken a bite out of the cake and yelped. A small many colored rat like thing was squirming out of the hole. Then it jumped at Abe with a screech. "AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Could be heard throughout the valley. Nen and Dave were up in a nearby tree. "Awww, looks like Abe doesn't like Pico's, and that was my best one!" Said Nen with an evil grin...
It was the Morning 2 days after the Pico incident. Abe could finally take the bandages off his nose. He was heading for Alf's for his morning tea and donuts. Once he reached it, he could hear uncontrollable laughter coming from inside. He walked in. Every Mudokon in the place was holding a piece of paper and laughing. "What's so funny?" asked Abe to the nearest Mudokon. "Take a look! Heheehe!" the Mud handed Abe the paper. Abe stared at the picture. Then he turned redder (or greener, I have no idea) than any Mudokon in history. They were nude pics of Abe. Every one in the room stared at him with questioning eyes. "Uhhh, I was young! I needed the money!" Abe attempted to explain. In a fancy shack high up in the trees...
Nen and Dave had just come back from Alf's. "Ah, I love the Internet! Don't you Nen?" said Dave putting down a bag half way full of pictures. "Yep! So easy to get info on all of your friends!" She said as she pulled out her list labelled "Top ten ways to make Abe's life a living hell..."
Chapter 9
"Are we going ta do it this week?" Dave asked Nen hopefully. "Oh yeah!" said Nen as she held up the many electric devices they had been working on for the past month. That night...
All the Mudokons were sleeping soundly in their huts and/or hammocks. All snoring of course. Suddenly... "AAAAAHHHHH! THE SLIGS ARE COMING! THE SLIGS ARE COMING! AHHHHH! SLOGS AS FAR AS THE EYE CAN SEE! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" Screamed a familiar Mudokon as he ran through the valley. Everybody woke up and... began to panic. They continued to run about like headless chickens until morning, then they realized they'd been had.
Of course, Nen and Dave had gone back home one hour after the whole thing happened. They got a good night's sleep while Abe had been up all night giving out orders...
The next morning...
Nen had sneaked into to the fancy two story hut that Abe lived in. She peeked into his room. "Good... at least he doesn't sleep in." she whispered. She snuck up to his huge fancy bed. "Damn! What is this guy? A God?" she muttered looking at the King sized bed. She yanked off the only sheet and then pulled out her Emerald blade and cut a hole in the mattress. She pulled a round device with little speakers all over it out of her small bag. She crammed it into the hole then sewed the hole up. She remade the bed hastily then climbed out the window. That night...
Abe was curled up in his bed, snoring loudly. Back at the shack in the tree's...
Nen held a microphone up to her beak. "Ready?" she asked Dave. Dave giggled and nodded. Nen inhaled air into to her powerful Sy-hoon lungs and, " ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !" She screeched. Back at Abe's...
Abe leapt five feet out of his bed, then hit the floor with a thunk. A horrible sound was coming from somewhere in the room. He couldn't even hear his own voice screaming in agony.
Some where around 6 in the morning, at Nen and Dave's place...
Dave was snoozing peacefully (Nen and Dave don't have beds. The sleep on the floor in the Japanese fashion) when he got the odd feeling he was being watched. He opened one eye, then the other. Abe was standing in front of him, one of his eyes were bulging out and he had a large vein popping out of his forehead. "Oh, hi Abe! Have a...good nights sleep?" asked Dave as he got up. Abe did not reply. Abe clenched his hand in to a fist and drew back his arm...
"Hey Nen! I need some help here! GET UP!" said Dave from his room. "This better be good..." mumbled Nen as she pulled herself out of bed. She stepped in to Dave's room. On the floor was the mangled and passed out body of Abe. "Hmmmm, looks like you need help with the garbage." said Nen with a smile. They both grabbed Abe and carried him out to the door, and dropped him to the ground (which was two miles down). They watched as he hit the soft muddy ground with a splat. "Man, how did he get up here?" wondered Nen...
Chapter 10
It was about a month after that last prank. Nen had adopted a Sloggie named Silver. She loved him with all her heart. Silver loved Abe's leg with all his heart. One day, Nen was carefully making a stink bomb for you know who, when Dave ran through the door. "Oooo! Ooo! Nen!" he said while gasping for breath. "Whaaa? I'm busy!" she mumbled, not taking her eyes off the bomb. "Abe just got this thing called a Gabbit from these Vykkers, and its name is Munch, and It has this thing on its head that lets it posses machines and-" "Take a breath before you pass out on the floor!" Nen interrupted. Dave did. "So what about this Gabbit? Why are you so happy?" Nen asked. Dave grinned an evil grin. "Well, Abe kidnapped Munch so Munch would help him with his big war on the Glukkons, but Munch REALLY hates Abe." "So?" "Weellll, I was thinking... just ta piss Abe off... WE COULD KIDNAP MUNCH!" cried Dave. "Oh good, another mouth to feed." said Nen looking at Silver. "Naaa, we could just hold on to him long enough ta make Abe go nuts." said Dave. "We've made him go nuts 2 times already." said Nen. "Third times a charm!" chirped Dave. At Alf's...
Abe was in Alf's Rehab and Tea, unsuccessfully trying to spoon feed Munch. "Here comes the space ship going into the... uh... space ship thingy..." said Abe as he held up a spoon to Munch's lips. "Up yours!" replied Munch. "Come on! Eat!" begged Abe. "Screw you stitch lips!". Nen and Dave were watching from the doorway. "Hehe, looks like we found your soul mate Nen!" said Dave. "Yuck!" Nen gagged. "Oh yeah? You're the last of your kind!" replied Abe to Munch. Munch raised one hairless eyebrow. "So?" he asked. Nen leaned close to Dave and whispered, "Ok, you make a distraction and I'll grab Mr. wheel chair!". "Ok!". Dave ran up to the counter where Alf was serving Tea and leapt up on to it. "Hey everybody! Look, I'm Abe!" He held up one hand that had two eyes drawn on to it. He used it to represent Munch. "H-here c-c-comes the the Space ship thingy!" he stuttered. A murmur of laughter ran through the room. "Ooooo! I'm Abe! And I cried like a baby when I was going to be made into a meat smoothie! And an old guy saved me! Duh, eat Mr. Gabbit!" he said as he crossed his eyes and made a dopey grin. "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" cried Abe in a voice that was totally not him. He jumped up on to the counter. "Ooohhhh nooo! Abe's going to zap me with his scaaarrryyy power!
Hhehehe- WHOOOAAAAA!" Dave slipped off the counter and landed on Alf. While this was happing, Nen had grabbed Munch (who had been laughing like an idiot at Dave's show) and wheeled him out of there. Five hours later, Dave came home bruised and smelling like herbal tea. "That was the best thing I've ever done!" he gasped before he fainted on the ground...
Chapter 11
Munch had been taken hostage by Nen and Dave. It was morning and Nen was making breakfast. Dave and Munch were sitting at the table. Dave had been staring at Munch silently for the past half hour. "Whaaat?" Munch finally asked. "I don't know why, but when I look at you, I get the urge to smoke a big thick cigar." Dave said without taking his eyes off Munch. "Grub!" shouted Nen as she carried 2 plates of ground up Foxfire nuts into the room. "What's this?" demanded Munch as Nen set the plate down in front of him. "Foxfire nuts, if you don't want it... that's fine with me." said Nen calmly as she sat down to eat her bowl of WHOLE Foxfire nuts. Munch looked at the food for a sec, the picked up his small spoon and tasted it. "Hey! This is better that that crap blue ass was giving me!" he exclaimed. "So you actually ate some of it?" asked Nen. "Then spat it in stitch boy's face!" laughed Munch. Nen's eyes suddenly lit up. "Oh! Hey Munch, know any dirt on Abe?" Nen asked Munch. "Like what?" "You know... bad habits, dark secrets... that stuff!" said Nen. "Hmmmmm..." Munch rubbed his chin as he thought. "Well, he has been talking about you two for ever since I got here. And he has this horrible fear of Slogs-" "SLOGS!?" cried Nen and Dave at once. "Oooohhhhh yeah! When he was getting me out of the labs, he ran into one old sleeping Slog and freaked out! Hehehehe!" said Munch as he ate. "Gooood!" smiled Nen. "Silver! Here Silver! Come here boy!" Dave called. Silver (the Sloggie) came skittering into the room, yapping away at Munch. Nen picked up Silver. "Lets go for a walk, shall we?" Some where near the Valley...
Abe was leading a troop of Mudokons (the ones with long feathers and spears) through the forest. They were looking for Munch. Abe didn't know that Nen had taken him. Abe thought that Munch had made a run for it while Abe had been wrestling with Dave (and losing). "MUUUUNNNCHHHH!" He cried. "Come back! I'm sorry! Come on!" You could see the desperation on his face.
Suddenly, "YARYARYARYARAYRYAYRARYAYRARARARARAR!" yapped a voice. Abe froze in terror. Out of the woods came... a Sloggie! "RUUUUNNNN!" Cried Abe. "But Abe. its just a-" one of the Mudokons started, but Abe was already up in the nearest tree. The Sloggie ran up to the tree and began to run around it, yapping all the way. Somewhere in the bushes, Dave, Munch and Nen were laughing their heads off. "Hey Abe! Why don't you posses it?" asked one of the Mudokons. "Ohhhhh yeaaahh!" said Abe slowly. He put his hands together and started to Chant. "HEY!" Screeched Nen. She jumped out of the bushes and up to the tree that Abe was in. She took a deep breath..."Cover you ears!" Dave told Munch. " ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !" Nen screeched. Abe fell out of the tree and began to roll around on the ground in agony. So were the other Mudokons. "That'll teach you to posses my Silver!" said Nen as she scooped up the Sloggie in her arms. Abe was screaming to much to hear her. "Ok, see ya!" she said.
Chapter 12
"HEY ABE!" cried Nen into Abe's ear. Abe leapt 2 feet into the air. "You!" he said, pointing an accusing finger at Nen. Nen stared at him. "Yeah?". "You..." began Abe. Nen sighed and clamped a hand over his mouth. Abe struggled to pull her hand away from his mouth but was unsuccessful. "Guess what tattoo Bob? I'm going to have a music concert for you and your little cult! That should give you and your unwashed masses a little culture." she said. "Phhhmmmpp? Mmmmmmpppttt!" replied Abe. "You say you would be honored to have me sing for your frat boys? Of course Abe! Any thing for Mr. Savior/Salami!" "Nnnnnnnmmmmmpppt!" said Abe. Nen removed her hand from Abe's mouth and before he could say a thing, she was gone. That night...
The stage where Alf's "Brew-aholics" meeting was usually held had been turned into a concert hall. Nen was dressed in the garb of a Sy-hoon priestess. She also had one of those microphones that you wear around your neck. Abe was tied to a tree out in the woods some where, screaming his head off.
"This first song is one my brother Mik made up. Ahem. Constipation, deadly aggravation, that's the game we play! Take a bowling ball, roll it down the hall. Hit your dad, now he's mad! WEEEEEE! Constipation deadly aggravation, that's the game we plaaayyyyyy!" She chucked out 5 more verses before it ended. Everyone just stared. "This is what I mean by unwashed!" mumbled Nen. "HEY!" cried every Mudokon in the crowd. "Ok ok, here's a better one!" Some techno music started up. "Do you think your better off alone? Do you think your better off alone?" she sang. "BOOO!" cried the Crowd. "How about this? Fly me to the moon, where I may dance among the staaarrs, let me see what life is like on Jupiter and Mars... In other wooorrrddddsss hold my haaaanddd, in other wooorrrds... I looooovvveee you! FFFFllllllyyyy meeeee-HEY!" She noticed that everyone but Dave was gone. Dave was clapping slowly. "Encore!" he said sarcastically. "Cram it!" she snapped. "Let's go untie Abe and go home." said Dave with a yawn. "What's the hurry? Being tied to a tree all night builds character!" Nen said as they passed by Abe's house and stole every spare loin cloth he had...
Chapter 13
For Abe, being tied to a tree for 2 days before being found was the last straw. He did know where Nen and Dave lived so he decided go there (with about 50 Mudokons). And at 5 in the morning too. Nen, Dave and Munch (Nen made Dave share his room with the Gabbit) were sound asleep. Suddenly, "Thunk! Thunk!" Dave woke up and listened carefully. 2 miles below, Abe had ordered all the Mudokons to start chopping down the trees that supported Nen's shack. "Uh, Nen?" Dave had stepped into Nen's room. "Mmmm?" was all Nen said as she slept. "I think we have an A-b-e problem." Dave said quietly. "Just punch him in the gut and throw him out" mumbled Nen with her eyes still closed. "I don't think-" Dave started. He was interrupted by a loud "CRRRRRAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKK!" Followed by the floor falling out from beneath him and Nen. Down below...
Abe was laughing like an idiot as the shack fell 2 miles down and hit the ground with a bang, followed by a lot of dust. All the Mudokons started to high five each other when suddenly, out of the dust, Nen... barely half dressed... holding up her green blade, came and said in a demon like voice "THE STITCHED ONE DIES!"
Then all the Mudokons ran for the valley (including Abe who was still laughing about his victory!) .
Chapter 14
Nen as you know, was MAD. First of all, she had to find a new high up place to live aaannnd yank up lots of wood and stuff. That took about a month. Oh, and Abe had also taken back Munch. So anyway, a month and a half later Nen and Dave had finally built and moved into their new home (and they didn't tell Abe where it was ether!). But that didn't stop them from visiting him.
Dave was in Alf's, getting some tea and donuts. As he stuffed himself, he noticed that all the other usually slap happy Mudokons were kinda (REALLY) depressed looking. "What's up?" Dave asked Alf. Alf looked at Dave and moaned. "Poor Abe, he's doomed! Poor guy. I wish I had never called him stitch lips in the desert. I never even got ta say sorry!" he wailed. "What? What happened?" asked Dave thinking that Abe had probably got stuck in a tree or Nen had pulled some prank without telling Dave (she did that sometimes). "Abe went ta dis factory 50 miles away ta blow it up, and he got caught! It seems that the factory was built just to lure Abe there. And he was instantly caught because there were millions guards and cameras and Slogs and Greeters and-" Alf went on for about an hour. Then he came to the interesting part. "-so now that they caught him, they're going to have him executed publicly in front of millions of Mudokon slaves and even more Glukkons. Maggie the Glukkon Queen is even going to be there! Poooooorrrrr Abe!" Alf wept. "That's sooooo sad" a voice said sarcastically. Nen was standing behind Dave. "I got tired of waiting for the Tea" she explained. "Abe's going to be executed Nen!" Dave cried. Nen raised a (hairless) eyebrow. "Soooo? When's the party?" she asked. "2 days, at some major city half way across the continent." mumbled Alf as he poured some tea in to a cup and watched as it over flowed onto the counter. Nen grinned and said, "All's well that ends well!". Everyone just stared at her with sad eyes ('cept for Dave who just looked confused). Nen noticed this and groaned. "For the love of the 4 mythical dogs! Fine! I'll go and save the bum!". Dave gasped. "Nen! You'll be killed! I don't want you to diiiieeee!" he whined. "Oh come on Dave! Abe's a clumsy bum who only got by on dumb luck. And his luck just ran dry! So I'll take my swift strong self and save him before he gets cut into confetti!" "Confetti? Is that good to eat?" Dave wondered. Nen banged her head on the table.
Chapter 15
2 days later...
In a big indoor stadium somewhere faaaarr away...
"LIVE! FROM BLOODLUST STADIUM! THE BIG MESSY EXECUTION OF ABE! THEY'LL BE CELEBRITIES! MUSIC! FOOD! AND THE SWIFT HORRIBLE DEATH OF ABE!" said the Slig on the stage with a mike. Everyone clapped. In the front row were many Mudokon slaves. In the back, in fancy plush seats were rich Glock stars and other high level Glukkons who could afford to see this show. And behind them was the HUGE Maggie. "And here's special guest Manny, owner of Scrab Burger!" A richly dressed Glukkon walked on stage. Everyone clapped. "Thank ya thank ya!" Behind him, a ring of Sligs was pushing and prodding Abe onto stage. They led him to an electric chair and forced him to sit down in it. They began to strap him in. "Our first act ta night is everyone's favorite Slog! YIPPIE!" cried Manny. Everyone cheered. A Slog ran on to the stage and began doing back flips. "We love you Yippie!" cried a bunch of Mudokons. After about 50 back flips, the Sligs had finished strapping Abe in and went off stage, leaving in Abe in full view of everyone. He had the same expression on his face that he had in the beginning of Oddysee.
"Our next act is one I just hired last night!" said Manny into the mike. "Dis purple weirdo comes up ta my desk and goes "Manny ya gotta hire me!" So I was like "Ya? Why should I?" and she's like "Watch me!" and she starts singing a buuuueeetfuulll song! So I'm like "Ya got da job!" So here she is! NEN!" Nen leapt onto stage wearing A purple tunic with tons of purple ribbons trailing out from behind her. Abe looked up and saw her. "YOU!" He raged. Nen did a quick twirl and smiled at him. Some techno Music started up. "Do you think your better off alone? Do you think your better off alone? Talk to me, Ooooo talk to meeeee!" she sang. All the Mudokons covered their ears and groaned. The Glukkons cheered. While Nen sang, Dave slowly snuck onto stage...
Chapter 16
Ok, ta make a long story short, Nen hypnotized the Glukkons with her singing and dancing and Dave got Abe outta there. You would think Abe would be grateful. You would think Abe would say, "Gee golly Nen and Dave, you two is my best'is friends!". But he did not. That may be due to the fact that Nen forced him to hide in her suitcase while they returned to the valley. And the fact that Nen let loose a whole box of Picos in Abe's bed while he slept. And the fact that she and Dave continued to play loud noises on the microphone Nen had hidden in his bed. Abe felt the time had come to eliminate two problems in his already stress filled life.
Nen was laying on the grass outside of Alf's tea. Dave was inside doing his famous impressions of Abe. Nen was half asleep half brain storming about something fun to do (fun as in drive Abe nuts for the 20th time). Somewhere in the forest...
Abe was standing with his arms stretched out. A flock of birds flew to him and began to fly in a figure 8 in front of him...
In Alf's tea hut...
"Hello, My name is Abe, and I enjoy running into walls repeatedly! And the only one who understands me is Mr. Gabbit. Right Mr. Gabbit?" Dave held up one hand that had a crude sock puppet that looked like Munch. "No! You fart all the time and then get drunk and eat my eggs!" Dave made the puppet say. Everybody laughed. Outside...
Nen was getting really board of waiting. Suddenly a shadow fell over her. She looked up. "Oh, if it isn't Mr. Mudpie! How are the voices in your head today?" Nen said smirking at Abe. Abe just stared back angrily. "Oh what's that? They want you to come to Necrum and save them from being made into Arts and Crafts? Well you better hurry Baka boy!" she said then laughed out loud at her own wit. Abe said nothing. Abe calmly put his hands together and began to chant. "Oh no... I am doomed... Abe is gunna posses me and make me walk off a cliff" Nen said dully. She pulled out her green blade. "Don't make me do this Abe" Nen warned. Abe stopped. "That's be-" suddenly birds came from every direction and flew at Abe. Nen watched in shock as Abe's body was surrounded in white energy and he became a horrible creature. "SSSSSHHHRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" The creature formally known as Abe howled. Bolts of lightning shot from his body and flew to Nen. She barely dodged them with all of her skill. The ground was torn apart by the blasts. Nen leapt up into the air and held her blade high above her head. Then she brought it down into the monster's head. The beast howled angrily but not in pain. Nen pulled the blade out and jumped back. Dave and the others came running out of Alf's. Dave shouted something but it was lost in the roar of the beast. Nen avoided another turret of lighting and then fumbled for her bow and arrows. She hastily fitted an arrow into the bow and took aim. Suddenly the energy stopped and the beast shrank back into Abe. "YOU BLUE BASTARD!" Nen cried in pure hate. "After every thing I've done for you... you... you try to KILL ME?!" "You mean every thing you've done TO me!" Abe shot back. "YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A WEAK, STUPID, HELPLESS... FOOL! YOU WILL DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH SOME DAY! NOT BY ME BUT BY SOME CORPORATE BEAST WHO WILL LAUGH AS YOU SCREAM FOR MERCY!" Nen exploded. Abe just scowled at her. "Come on Dave, we are leaving this idiot and his foolish followers and going home!" Dave left the crowed of stupefied Mudokons and stood by Nen. They began to walk away from the valley. Dave was silent but Nen talked. "You deserve better then having to hang around them. I've made you smarter and stronger then all of them put together! We are moving back to the Sy-hoon city in the desert!" Dave's eyes opened wide. "Really?" he asked. "Yes, and I'll make sure every one treats you like a real person. Anyone who stops to poke fun at you loses their kidney!" Nen said grimly.
Chapter 17
Back at Nen and Dave's shack in the trees...
Nen was packing up everything she owned (which was very little). So was Dave (he had even less!). Earlier Nen had contacted Tin and told him about her little scuffle. Tin said he'd he glad to have her back. He even was going to send one of their few hover crafts so Nen and Dave wouldn't have to walk with all their stuff. Somewhere around sunset the craft came and the pilot Sy-hoons helped them with their stuff. Dave picked up Silver in his arms and followed Nen onto the ship. The trip back to the city took all night, but by morning, they were there.
"Hey bucko! Wake up!" Nen said as she poked Dave with her finger. "Mmmm" Dave replied. "UP!" Nen yelled in his ear. "Ga! What?" Dave mumbled as he groggily sat up in his seat. "We're here! Look!" Nen pointed to the small window. Dave looked down below. In the middle of the desert was a shiny silver dome. It was surrounded with farmland and orchards. "Ooooo!" Dave exclaimed. They landed. Nen paid some bums (that's what she calls people she doesn't know) to carry their stuff. "Ah, the place sure has changed!" Nen said as she looked around. Suddenly, "Nen! Over here darling!" cried a voice. "LUM!" Nen cried. A small group of female Sy-hoons came over to Dave and Nen. "Nen! Tin said ya were coming back! We left your apartment they way it was when you left!" said another Sy-hoon named Ivy. Nen talked to her friends for a while. Then Lum noticed Dave. "Oh! Is this your little "Friend" Nen?" Lum asked with a wink. "Not THAT kind of friend! Don't you know that Mudokons are-" "Cute as the dickens? Oh yeah!" Interrupted a Sy-hoon named Vem. "I just Loooovvveee those things! They look so cute when they get embarrassed! Ooo! Just like that!" Vem pointed to Dave who was trying to hide himself behind Nen. "Awwww! He's shy!" gushed Lum. "HOW KAWII!" Ivy Lum and Vem said together. "Kawii?" Dave wondered. "It means cute" Nen said. "But look at what he's wearing!" Ivy exclaimed as she looked at Dave's old loin cloth. "He's practically naked! We must make him a proper tunic!" Lum said as she took Dave by the arm and led him away. "NEN!?" Dave cried in panic. "Ah you'll be fine! BRING HIM BACK TA MY PLACE WHEN YOUR DONE!" Nen called after them...
Chapter 18
Nen's apartment...
Nen was putting the last of her things away when, "Knock knock!" a voice said from behind the front door. Nen opened it. Dave and Ivy were standing at the door. Dave was wearing a faded brown tunic just like Nen's. "Isn't he just the cutest?" Ivy asked. "Aw! You look like a green beakless Sy-hoon!" Nen joked. "Egh" Dave grunted. She thanked Ivy and let Dave in. "I fixed the place back up, but there's only one bed so you'll have to sleep on the couch till the one I ordered comes." Nen explained. "Why can't we share a bed?" Dave asked (clueless as usual). Nen bonked her head on a nearby wall. "Because it's too small!" Nen informed him. Then she noticed his feet. "Hey! They made you sandals too?" She had her own worn out pair but rarely used them. The souls of her feet were like leather. "They made them my size, but they smell bad!" Dave complained. "New leather smell. It will go away." Nen explained. "Now let's go to the dance floor!" Nen cheered. "Whaaaa?" Dave said before he was yanked out the door.
The dance floor seemed to be the heart of the ship. It was 7:00 and the club was jumping. There was a balcony floor where you could sit around, eat and watch the dancing. Then there was the main dancing floor that had platforms here and there that Sy-hoons would jump up on and do crazy dances. That night it was packed (like it ever wouldn't be?). Nen stood at the top of the balcony stairway, gazing at the wild scene. Dave was just gaping at the craziness that lay before him. "Let get some sweet sake first. It gives ya plenty of energy to dance the night away!" Nen said as she dragged Dave to a big fancy drinking fountain. She filled up two big cups of a thick light green liquid and gave one cup to Dave. "What's dis stuff?" Dave asked as he stared into his cup. "Sweet sake! Its like... beer." Nen said quickly. "Hmmmm..." Dave took one more look at his cup and then downed the whole cup in one gulp. "Hehehe! Good idea!" Nen drank the whole thing too. Now as you know, Mudokons are sensitive souls with the resistance of a speed bump. As for anything that is classified as "beer", one is too many and one hundred is not enough.
Nen pulled Dave down to the dance floor and began to let lose. Sweet sake for a Sy-hoon is like giving a hyper active 4 year old a bag of powdered sugar followed with a gallon of Kool-Aid. Sweet sake for a Mudokon is like giving a 18 year old 50 gallons of the hardest beer around. And 5 minutes later...
Nen was kicking it. She had located Sky and much to his annoyance, forced him to dance with her. Some techno music started up, "Around the world, around the world, around the world, around the world..." the music went on. Nen suddenly noticed that Dave was nowhere in sight. "That's odd," she thought to herself. "He never strays too far away from me, especially in a new place like this." she shrugged off the odd feeling she had and continued to make sure Sky didn't sneak away. Suddenly Nen heard laughter, she looked up and saw Dave on one of the dancing platforms. His eyes were in a half closed state and he was doing a dance Nen later named, "The Funky chicken". "Hey he's good!" Sky said as he noticed Dave's wild actions. "Round da world, round da world! Oh my freaking head..." Dave said as he got jiggy with it. "Wasted! I can do that! I can do that toooooooo-" Dave slipped off the platform and hit the floor. "Dave!" Nen ran over to see if the drunk Mudokon had killed himself. To everyone's surprise, Dave picked himself off the ground and continued to do some crazy dance that looked a lot like "The Monkey" but involved some feet kicking. After about 7 more hours of wild partying, Nen finally got tired and dragged Dave's passed out body back to the apartment.
Chapter 19
Next day...
"Wake up you lazy bum!" Nen said for the 67th time. Dave was asleep on the couch. "UUUUPPP!" Nen said into his small ear. "My freaking head..." Dave mumbled but didn't open his eyes. "My head is throbbing and there's a ringing in my ears..." he grumbled. "I'm going to go to breakfast and you are too!" Nen Told him. "You'll never take me alive..." he told her and rolled over. "Oh yeah?" The dining hall...
Nen was pulling the half awake Dave by his pony tail down the hall. "It's your own fault," Nen was telling him. "You just haaaad to sneak off and drink more sake, get drunk, start a dancing riot and then smash your head on the floor." "What? I only had the one cup you gave me!" Dave told her. "Suuuuurrrreee ya did, just ooonnneee cup of sake made you lose your grasp on reality." Nen said rolling her eyes. They were almost at the door to the dinning room when, "ARTICUNO, HEAR MY CRY!" a crazy Sy-hoon in long purple robes and streamers coming out of everywhere cried. "Kuso! It's that crazy priestess again!" Nen groaned. The priestess did a fancy twirl and jumped in front of Nen and Dave. Nen let go of Dave's pony tail. "Listen! Listen children!" The Sy-hoon (whose name was Bar) cried as she waved her hands in the air. "When God of Freeze, God of Flame, and God of Thunder are captured, the God of Sea shall rise up to free Ice Fire and Lightning! And the land and the heavens shall be brought down in their rage! To make the foursomes anger undone, one must call upon... GOD OF SUN!" Bar cried. Nen and Dave just stared. "Stop it," Nen said in annoyance. "Your scaring the Mudokon with your crazy prophecies." She gestured to Dave who was asleep on the floor. "LUGIA DAMN YOU!" Nen howled as she yanked Dave up off the floor by his pony tail. "Do not use a God's name in vain." Bar said calmly. "Up yours! I don't got time to be worried that Surbii will send God of Thunder to shock me because I said that Lugia was a bum." Nen said as she walked past Bar, dragging a whining Dave behind her. Bar sighed. "You should..."
Chapter 20
"Ok kids, this is a Mudokon. Look but don't touch." Nen said to the masses of young Sy-hoons. It was an hour after breakfast and some teacher from the preschool had asked Nen if Dave could come over and let the kids see a real live Mudokon. "Touch!" a little kid cried as he poked Dave's foot. Nen rolled her eyes. The little Sy-hoons had never seen a Mudokon in real life. They only got to see them in pictures. They were very interested in Dave. A bit TOO interested. "Can he play with us?" a little girl asked. "NO!" Dave cried. "Sure!" Nen said. The kids were on him in five seconds. They dog piled onto him and began to say things like, "OOOO! A worm is coming out of his head!" or, "He smells like tee tee!" "He gots big eyes!" "YA!" Dave cried as a kid stuck his finger into Dave's eye. 5 minutes later...
"You're it!" said a little kid. "I don't want to be it!" Dave complained. "YOU'RE IT!" the kid insisted. "NO!" Dave informed the kid. "CRUNCH!" was the sound the kid made when it bite into Dave leg. Five minutes later...
"Baka!" a boy giggled. "No..." Dave told the kid as he yanked another kid clinging to his leg off. "Yucky!" said another kid as she chucked a toy at Dave's butt. "Bad... uh... thingy!" Dave scolded her. "KAMAKAZI!" A boy in a blue bird mask cried as he jumped off of the book shelf and at Dave. "WHAT?" Dave cried as he grabbed the kid out of the air and set him on the ground. "Awwww, the kids looooovvvvee you!" Nen said while sitting in a chair with a story book. "God damn brats!" Dave muttered. "TOUCH!" cried a kid with a hand full of paint as she hurled a jewelry box at Dave's head. "F*********!" Dave screeched at full volume. The children were silent. "Oh Hellfire..." Nen moaned. "What's F*** mean?" the kid with the mask asked. "Never ever say that word again!" Nen told the kid. Every kid in the class considered this bit of info, then, "F*** F*** F*** F***!" every kid cried. "Let's leave now!" Nen shouted to Dave over the profanity. "Ok!" Dave yelled back.
Chapter 21
It was a lazy day. Nen had been sun bathing on top of the silver dome but soon got bored of that. Dave had been throwing sticks for Silver the Sloggie but soon also got bored. They both went back to Nen's apartment and laid out on the couch. "God of Flame, I'm bored." Nen said. "Then let's do sumthing." Dave suggested as he leaned back on the couch. "Yeah, let's do something." Nen said. They were both silent for 2 minutes. "Man it's boring without Abe to torture." Nen grumped. "Yeah, I miss playing jokes." Dave agreed. "We should find someone TO play jokes on." Nen said. "Later" Dave said then promptly fell asleep. "Can't argue with that." Nen said and was soon snoozing.
3 days later...
A Mudokon named Sid was wandering through the desert. He was extremely thin and dehydrated. He was barley even walking upright. He was slouching over with his mouth open. "Aw man... I'm gunna die out here!" He gasped through his dry mouth. Suddenly he spotted something shiny on the horizon. "Water? Uhhh... gotta keep going..." Sid muttered.
Later...
Nen and Dave were just hanging around on the edge of the farmlands outside the domed city. "Go swimming?" Nen suggested. "Naaaa" Dave said. "Sleep more?" "Maybe... naaa I'm all sleeped out." "Go stalk Sky?" Nen said grinning. "Noooo! We did that for half of last week!" Dave complained. Nen shrugged and leaned against a tree to snooze. Dave looked out at the cracked desert and then sat down and snoozed in the shade. Back in the desert...
Sid was slowly getting closer to the shiny thing he had thought was water. He now saw that it was a huge metal dome with farms and trees around it. "Oh no... a factory? All my work for nothing?" Sid said as he remembered the past 4 months. He had once been a slave at a steel mill. It was even worse there than at Rupture Farms and SoulStorm Brewery combined. They worked you day and night, fed you only once a week, and if you died, your body was made into feed for the other slaves. Plus there was the horrible heat of the melted metal and the danger of falling in. New slaves were being shipped in every day. Sid could no longer take it, he would rather die trying to escape then starve to death, drop from execution or being burned alive. Somehow he was able to slip out during a factory shut down for inspection. Unfittingly he had discovered that the factory was in the middle of a wasteland that had been mined dry of metal. Sid had walked out of the wasteland and into the desert. He had survived by eating strange plants and drinking from springs, but after 3 months, there were no more springs or plants of any kind. Now that Sid saw this great silver dome (which he thought might be a Glukkon factory). "I cant take it any more!" Sid groaned. "I might as well turn myself in at this place. Nowhere could be as bad and that steel mill." With that, Sid dragged his nearly dead body toward the city.
Chapter 22
"Birds are evil" Nen said Lazily as she looked at one of those red headed birds as it pecked the ground for food. "Mmmmhmmm" Dave said, half asleep. "Fish are evil" "Mmmp" "Mudokons are evil" she said to see if he was really listening. "That's nice" Dave said and rolled over. They were still under that tree and the sun was showing hints of starting to set. Nen stood up. "I'm going to get a drink and then return to gut you." Dave lifted up one hand and made a "Shoo shoo" motion. Nen left. Dave was just starting to drift into real sleep when, "Can I have some of that fruit?". Dave opened his eyes to see a REALLY thin Mudokon standing in front of him. "WHOA!" Dave had never in his life seen anyone or anything so thin. Without thinking he yanked a blue peach like fruit from the tree and tossed it to the Mudokon. The Mudokon devoured it and swallowed the pit. "Who are you?" Dave asked after he stopped gaping at the thin Mudokon. "I'm Sid. I escaped from a hell hole factory and came here for easier work." "This ain't a factory! Its a city of these aliens called Sy-hoons. Nobody is a slave here!" With saying that, Dave grabbed the Mudokon by his thin arm and pulled him through the fruit trees to the silver domed city. Just as he was about to enter, "Oh my Moltres! Look at that poor Mudokon!" It was Lum and her friend Ivy. "Awwwww! He looks like he's never seen a decent meal!" Lum grabbed the Mudokon and picked him up. "He doesn't weigh a thing!" "Uh, I was going to take him to Nen, soooo could I have him ba-" Dave started. "NO WAY! Nen already has a pet, YOU! But me? *Sob!* I don't have a Mudokon to pet and cuddle and dress up like a baby! So I get him!" With that, Lum slung Sid over her Shoulder and ran off. Dave just stared. Then decided to follow.
Chapter 23
Dave had followed Ivy and Lum to their little fruit stand. Dave hid himself behind a wall and peeked around the edge. What he saw was Sid scoffing down 12 baskets of blue fruit and then drinking 20 gallons of water. "Hmmmmm, he looks like he'll be ok. I'll just tell Nen and let her deal with it. Next day...
Nen was sticking "Bury me alive" signs on passing Sy-hoons backs. Dave was making them as fast as Nen could stick them. Suddenly the next person she saw was Lum and Sid. Sid was for some reason, in a crudely made baby carriage being pushed by Lum. He even had a bonnet. Nen looked and laughed her heart out. Lum pushed Sid up to Nen and Dave. "Ha, looks like you're not the only one with a Mudokon now! Isn't he cute?" Lum bragged. Sid looked up at Dave pathetically. "Help me! She makes me wear a diaper!" Sid whispered. "Whoa, I hear you man. I get ya outa this!" Dave said then whispered something to Nen. She groaned, "Ok but you're going to owe me!". With that, Nen went over to Lum and said, "Oh Lum darling, would you like to go have some Volo tea with me and Sky? I can call him up and have a little get together!" "That sounds marvellous!" Lum replied. "And Dave can watch your "Baby" he's mature enough," Nen said with a wink to Dave. Dave nodded. "Oh yes Lum! We will have the most... gee golly gosh... time together." Dave said while attempting to sound cute and reliable. "Alright! See ya!" with that, Nen grabbed Lum by the arm ran off.
Chapter 24
2 hours later...
"Ahhh! That was a wonderful time! Too bad Sky suddenly had to go and throw up." Lum said as she and Nen walked back to the spot where they where supposed to meet Dave and Sid. "He just filled his mouth with tea and spat it on the ground! He is such a wimp! I just say ONE thing about a wedding and he fakes an illness!" Nen replied. They reached the table where Nen had been earlier making signs. There was no one in sight. "Oh poo! They must of gone back to your room for a nappy!" Lum said. "Nappy?" puzzled Nen. "My Siddy always has a nap around this time of day. Doesn't your ba-... I mean "friend" take a nap in the day time?" Lum asked. "No!" "Oh well. Let's go over to your apartment and I'll claim my baby" "My apartment?!" Nen cried. She knew that was where Dave was hiding Sid. "Uh Lum, I think Sid might of gone back to YOUR apartment! Soooo... SEE YA!" With that, Nen bolted away. Nen's apartment...
Nen walked in to her apartment to find Dave sitting on the couch and just zooning out (Sy-hoons don't have TV). "So where's the refugee?" Nen asked Dave. "Next time Lum or her friends come over, keep them from looking under your bed" Dave told her. "MY bed!? Why not YOUR bed? You Mudokons ALWAYS snore! ALWAYS!" Nen complained. "So you claim" Dave grumped. Nen walked into their room (she finally got a separate bed for Dave. Hey, there's only the small living room, one bed room, very small bathroom with tiny shower and the kitchen!). Nen bent down and looked under her bed. Sid was asleep with Silver the Sloggie laying on top of his stomach. "GET UP FREE LOADER!" Nen boomed. Sid yelped and hit his head on the bed. To make a short story shorter, Nen dragged Sid out from under her bed and shoved him under Dave's filthy excuse for a bed. "Can I have some water...in a bottle?" Sid asked from under the bed. "That Lum so spoiled you, it's bad enough I got another mouth to feed and also have to hide, but now I have to bottle feed him? What's next? A diaper change?" "Well I kind of need one of those about now..." Sid said. Nen had already slammed the bedroom door behind her.