Oi, these new chapters are annoying me! This has got to be the least best one yet...
Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own it.
Chapter Ten :: Ten Ladies Dancing
Life was just a game, a gamble—the first one, and the nonexistent one. He liked to take chances; after all, that's what a decent game was about. Strategy and skill were good too, but Luxord especially loved the thrill of not knowing what was going to happen as a result of the chances he took. Besides, luck was almost always with him; he didn't have much to fear.
And that is why Luxord enjoyed surprises. When this whole people-getting-into-the-castle-and-leaving-presents thing came up, it had taken the entire Organization by surprise. And so, I'm sure you can imagine which Nobody was the only one thrilled by this. Yup, the Gambler of Fate.
But what didn't thrill him was the fact that there were a bunch of ballerinas in his room that morning before Christmas Eve. They were flipping around and doing twirls and almost knocked down his shelf for poker trophies—multiple times. One had upset a table in the corner, and cards were now all over the floor.
"Please, settle down," Luxord tried to say in his best negotiating voice. "I'll take you out into the courtyard, where there's a spectacular view of Kingdom Hearts, and you can dance to your hearts' content—"
No one was listening, of course. One of the girls got up on her tippy toes, and her foot accidentally landed on a stray card. She tripped, and set off a chain reaction, to Luxord's horror. The dancer fell into another one, and that one knocked over another lady, and that ballerina reached out her hand to steady herself. The only thing in her grasping range was the trophy shelf—I'm sure you can imagine what happened from there.
Her fingers caught on the wood, and for a split second, she caught herself, and just hung there. The Nobody let a sigh of relief slip out, but it didn't last long. A creak was heard—one nail came out of the wall, making everything slide to one side, then the other came loose. The whole shelf—and when the authoress says "shelf," she does not mean a dinky one for holding t-ball trophies; she's talking huge, full of glass and many trophies that would hurt if bashed over the head with—came down with a loud CRASH!
Glass shattered and metal clanged, and all of the ballerinas scattered out of the way of the projectiles. Only one was hit—the lady who had knocked the shelf over in the first place—and was now bleeding in multiple places. Her fellow dancers helped to pick her up, and they walked out of the room without a single word.
Luxord blinked, first trying to get over the randomness, then trying to piece together in his mind that his entire collection of gambling trophies had just been dropped on the ground, most of them destroyed. There was no way he would be able to replace them all… most of them had been one of a kind collectables! He had won them from all over the universe—from at least fifty-two different worlds—during his Somebody life and Nobody life. The shattered mess was almost enough to make him cry… if he was sad about it, that is. He didn't feel any grief or anger over his destroyed collection—just horror, sheer, utter horror.
The gambler vowed that from that time on that he would never use wood and nails to put up any shelves ever again. He gathered the trophies and medals that were still intact, and set them upright safely in the corner. A thought passed through his mind before he swept up the broken glass, though. Perhaps Vexen had a device that could put the seemingly impossible task back together.
"My dear lovely accolades, I shall get you back to presentable quality once again," he muttered as he gently put the broken pieces into a bag. He then created a dark corridor, aimed for the castle's laboratory.
"No, absolutely not!" Vexen fumed. "I do not understand why every Nobody in this light-forsaken Organization believes that I can work miracles with simple science! I am not a mere handyman!"
"Now Vexen," Luxord prompted casually. "I would be proud if the others came to me, thinking I could fix their problems with my, ah, 'miracles.' I should think you would also."
"Fool!" he shrieked. "I do indeed realize that I am one of the most important members in this group of idiots, and that my science can work miracles! But I do not do work for impetuous upstarts who have no respect for their elders!"
Luxord almost laughed at how worked up his comrade was getting—he could be quite amusing sometimes. "You realize that I am not young, do you not? I may not be the oldest here, but I certainly respect others who have made it this far in the game."
"Must everything relate to poker with you?" The scientist exclaimed. "This is not a game! One wrong move and we could all be destroyed, never to see our hearts again!"
He smirked. "In other words, a simple mistake could result in anyone's elimination. You must realize, Vexen, yes, this is all a game." He then waved the matter aside. "Now, will you or will you not perform the task I have for you?"
Vexen scowled into the bag of glass. "No promises… the device I created is only being tested right now, and it has taken me years to build. Now, I require a large payment for all the jobs I fill, and I do understand you have a way with making deals. So what do you propose, Luxord?"
The Nobody smiled; a good negotiation was always enjoyable. "Munny? I—"
"No, I have that all ready." Vexen cut him off.
"Now, let me explain myself. I have recently run across a way to make large amounts of munny, much more than you would think."
He snorted. "I know." he grimaced, remembering the multiple times he had been stupid enough to make a bet with Luxord. "You con poor unsuspecting souls into gambling with you. Your methods are nothing new."
"Ah, but you don't know. I have ways even you have no ideas of."
Vexen looked thoughtful. "Now, what would that be?"
Luxord smiled wryly. "It's called the black market, my dear comrade."
The other snorted. "Now what would you be selling on that? Chocobos? Slaves?"
"Ah, that secret stays with me. Now, has the deal been sealed?"
"Fine, munny will do." he said, then put up a finger. "But I require something else."
"Whatever you please," Luxord confirmed, spreading his hands.
"I am lacking the essential materia for many of my projects. I need much of it."
Luxord sighed inwardly. He had been short on the rare material also; he would have to earn it from the others. Maybe they wouldn't gamble with munny, but he was pretty sure they would take their chances with the expert gambler with their materia.
He headed off to the Gray Area after shaking hands with Vexen, and sure enough found a few Nobodies there.
"Who's ready for a classy game of cards?" he called as he shuffled a deck.
"O-oh no! I've become smarter than to play go fish with you!" Demyx held his hands up.
"Now, do you really expect us to be fooled into losing all of our munny to you?" Xaldin pointed out. "It's happened one too many times."
"What if we aren't playing with munny?" Luxord asked innocently, and sat down at a table.
"Hmm…" Xigbar thought about it. "I'm listenin'."
He smiled. "Materia. I thought that perhaps playing for munny has gotten a bit old. And really, I prefer to play for the thrill of the game."
"Materia? Why ever would you want that?" Zexion walked over to the table.
"Just a little project is all, nothing important." Luxord said as he dealt the cards. "And how does this sound: I'll go a bit easy on you." he took the unsure nods from the others as a yes. "Now, who's ready to play?"
An hour later, Luxord the left a room with much materia, and four very annoyed Nobodies watched him leave.
"Well, that was… interesting." Zexion fingered his last piece of glowing metal he had managed to save.
"And I thought we had learned better than to play cards with him." Xaldin sighed. "Perhaps even the smartest of Nobodies can be fooled into playing with a master gambler."
Demyx laughed. "Yeah, you guys were idiots for doing that!"
"Hmph. You're the one to speak," Xigbar said. "You lost all of yours."
"Yeah, but I wasn't a genius in the first place! I thought you guys were smarter than that. Well, maybe not Xigbar…"
The others just glared at him.
Meanwhile, Luxord was on his way to gather the munny he needed to pay off Vexen.
You see, Luxord had always had a way with the black market in many worlds, and when Earth was discovered, he found out some interesting things. As stupid as it may sound, it appeared that raw milk was becoming harder to get, and it wasn't allowed to be imported in certain regions. Of course, he saw this as a perfect opportunity to make a good wage when Axel's milkmaid problem came up. He wouldn't have taken them in so kindly if he hadn't seen any gain coming from it. Luxord may have been an excellent gambler, but he was also a skilled businessman and con-artist. It was just the way he did things.
He eventually got to where the maids were staying, and he opened the door.
"Milk!" they cried when they saw Luxord. "Here is your milk!" Two of them handed him pitchers.
"Hmm… is this all?" he asked as he took one in each hand.
"Why of course, Brietta cannot give too much milk every day. It is not possible!" Boronia explained.
"Yes, I suppose so," he nodded, and headed for the door. "My sincerest apologies for making you feel obligated for more. Thank you, I shall be going now."
The door closed behind him. Of the many things Luxord knew how to do, getting women to comply by simply talking to them was one of his strong points. He smiled at his cunningness, but didn't at all see what was about to hit him. Literally.
Ten dancing ladies ran smack dab into his back, and he fell. So did the pitchers of precious liquid. For some reason, the women found no problem with this, and kept on dancing, right over Luxord and down the hall. Thankfully, the pitchers didn't shatter, but now the milk was all over the floor, and he wouldn't be able to sell it.
He bit his tongue and ran into his room—he would let the dusks clean the mess up. He took out a stash of munny he had acquired over the past two days. He had gotten dollars, pounds, and even yen transferred into munny through the Organization's moogle, and now most of it would have to be used.
For a second, Luxord wondered whether his trophies were really worth so much to him. He shook his head, clearing that thought. Of course they were. Besides, his very first trophy had been destroyed, and he wasn't ready to just throw away his impressive collection.
His stupid "presents" were ruining his livelihood! What would they take away from him next, his cards? His cards! Luxord walked frantically about the room, looking in all the places he kept spare decks. He was, well, more or less surprised to find that they were all gone. Out of paranoia, he summoned his weapon, and thankfully the entire deck was still there. He dismissed them, then gathered the materia and munny, and headed off to Vexen's laboratory. He would find his cards later.
When he arrived, the scientist was all ready at the door to meet him.
"Have you brought what I require?" he looked at his client impatiently.
"Vexen, is that really the first question you want to ask? Perhaps you should show me the finished product before I choose to give my precious savings away. How should I know whether you really filled my task or not, hmm?" Luxord cocked an eyebrow.
"Why ever would I do that? I am a man of my word, and I am surprised you would ever think otherwise!"
"One must always have his guard up," Luxord countered. "You never know when someone has false pretenses, especially when they hold a good poker face."
Vexen almost looked as if he wanted to comment on that, but he shut his mouth and led the other inside.
The crystal trophies were lined up on one counter, all in seemingly perfect condition. But with closer inspection, it could be seen that little pieces were missing here and there. That didn't particularly bother Luxord, but he noticed something else.
"Wait, one is missing. Where is it?"
Vexen examined the lineup. "Ah, yes. Unfortunately, one was not able to be repaired. The damage was too great."
"That was the most important one…" he sighed. "My very first poker championship trophy…"
"My dearest apologies, but if you do not mind, I would like my payment now."
Luxord shelled out the vast amounts of materia and munny, gathered his treasures, and left. Once he exited the dark corridor, he looked at the broken shelf.
"Now, why did I never think of a built-in shelf…? Such a novel idea, too…"
A/N: And thanks for the encouraging words, guys. I'm just not feeling my author abilities are too good right now...