Chapter Ten- What Have We Gotten Into
I get on the train without making eye contact with anyone. The Escort shows us our rooms and tells us that dinner would be in an hour. She eyes my newly torn dress and suggests that we get changed into more…comfortable clothes.
I immediately go to my drawers and search through them. I have a critical eye and toss aside anything that might be considered practical. I want delicate items that will hang off me. I strip down and look in the full-length mirror on the doors of the wardrobe. I have a prominent collarbone so if I wear strapped tops and dresses it will look as though I am skinnier than I really am. My legs and arms have rather defined muscles though from my tree climbing and axe-throwing so I must keep them covered with baggy materials. I decide on a silk slip with a thick, knitted cardigan over the top and satiny drawstring pants underneath.
I carefully fold up my Mother's dress and put it on the bedside table, topped by the pinecone she gave me. I hope my family are preparing their dinner as usual, not moping around, I don't want Little Joey to realise anything is different, except that I'm not there.
I hear Absalom's bedroom door close when he goes to dinner. I wait twenty minutes, comb my hair over my face again and slope to the dining carriage.
"Sorry I'm late." I let my voice quiver as I sit down next to The Escort, again not making eye contact.
"That's alright dear," The Escort says and I can feel everyone looking at me. "Would you like a shrimp cocktail Johanna? Have you ever had shrimp before? It's fresh from District 4, we stocked up on the way to pick you two up."
'Pick you two up' like we were going on a day trip. I almost snort but manage to turn it into a muffled sob.
"There, there dear," she pats my hand and I notice her pink and blue sparkling fingernails with what look like little diamonds trailing down her fingers to the knuckle.
"You've not made one cry already have you?" a male voice comes from behind me. I hadn't seen anyone else in the room when I came in.
"There you are Egor," The Escort beckons him over. "Is Blight on his way? He's nearly half an hour late."
Egor sits opposite me. He's old, really old. His voice is crackly and he has a napkin always in his hand to dab at the corner of his mouth. He's one of our Victors, there's one other but we never see him anymore. People have suggested that he's died without anyone noticing but I think I saw him at the Reaping last year.
"Young Blight…" Egor pauses, thinking. "Yes, I have seen him…not sure where though. Shall I go and find him?"
"No, no," The Escort says, then under her breath adds "We don't want to lose you as well."
"It's an honour to meet you sir," Absalom finally speaks. It's the first time I've heard his voice. I'm relieved to hear that it's ridiculously high pitched for a 17-year-old boy, I'd started to worry that we'd have a Finnick Situation with him, where the sponsors were so struck by his attractiveness that they gave him anything he wanted. With that voice though my worries are allayed.
"Thank you young man," Egor replies with grace, but looks at me "I expect we shall need to talk about what you two have gotten yourselves into here sooner rather than later."
"Shouldn't we wait for Blight?" The Escort cuts in. She obviously doesn't think very much about Egor's Mentoring abilities.
"I'm here," Blight stumbles in, catching himself on the drinks cabinet before he falls face first into the shrimp cocktail. "Lets go, lets talk strategy."
Absalom and I stare at our Mentors, one blind drunk holding his cutlery upside down, and the other, just blind.
Absalom becomes the first person that I make eye contact with; we both look at each other as if to say 'What have we gotten into?'.
"Some coffee Blight?" The Escort passes him a cup that's been pre-filled for him.
"Thank you," he takes it and his eyes try to focus on Absalom and me. "So, tell me about yourselves, what have we got to work with?"
I hide behind my hair again and let Absalom take the lead.
"I'm quite strong, I've been training with the Loggers for about a year now so I can hold an axe too."
Great, so I'm going to have to compete with him for the axe at the Cornucopia.
"What do you think you could work on Absalom?" Egor asks, still looking at me.
"Just call me Abe, I guess I could work on survival skills, how to make a shelter or start a fire."
Aha, I can make a fire, Father and I used to race to make fires for cooking some lunch on at out picnics.
"Ok, what about you Johanna?" This time Egor looks at The Escort, despite her luminous green hair arranged in an enormous pile on top of her head.
I shrug my shoulders and look at the floor.
"Nothing at all?" That shiny, sparkling hand is on mine again.
"Her Father works with mine," Abe informs them. "He's always talking about his children, idolises them, I should think she hasn't had to work for anything."
I'm glad he's said all of that, because it makes me hate him. I was afraid that, being from home, I would have an affinity with him but now I want him slaughtered with the others, whoever they are. He will not get my axe.
I make a moaning sound and push back my chair, fleeing to my bedroom. I got what I came for; I know Abe's strengths and weaknesses. I know that my Mentors will not help me. I know that everyone thinks I'm useless.
I haven't eaten anything since breakfast nearly 10 hours ago and it's been a stressful day. My stomach starts to rumble. I sit on my bed, thinking over my strategy. I'll need to not eat in front of them, Abe is as much my enemy as any other Tribute, he needs to believe that I haven't eaten in days, that I'm weak and tired.
As soon as I hear everyone move from the dining carriage I dash in and scoop up handfuls of dry food before the Avox servants can clear it away. I eat it in my room and make sure the curtains on my window are open before I go to bed. I need to be up early, I need the sun to wake me.
I sleep with the pinecone in my hand, it's not the most comfortable sleeping companion but it smells like happier times and I sleep better for having it with me.