Nine

"ASHLEY NO! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!" Grant stumbled forward, sinking his knife into the skull of the last walker in his sight. His hands fell on Ashley's still body, shaking her shoulders feverishly to try and get her eyes to open again. There was a gaping hole in her neck where the flesh had been ripped away by a walker and blood pooled around Ashley's head. There was so much of it, he was surprised that a human could contain the amount.

Tears ran down Grant's dirty cheeks, making tracks in the dirt and blood that was splattered on him as he continued to shake his friend and he felt his entire body trembling with the harrowing sobs emitting from him. She was limp in his hands, the muscles that Grant was so familiar with weren't tensing like they usually did when Ashley would move. He sobbed, placing his filthy hands on her face tenderly.

"Ash…no, please," his voice cracked pathetically. "I need you. Ash, please…"

He turned away from her, pressing his mouth to his shoulder in an attempt to calm himself. Grant knew what he was going to have to do, and he picked up the pistol that Ashley had dropped. It was heavy. It felt like her life was in his hands, even though he knew Ashley was gone. Nothing he'd ever done could prepare him for this. He couldn't stop shaking. Should he wait for her to wake up so that he'd know she was truly dead, or should he kill her now? Every feeling he could have raged inside of him, making him a wreck.

Reeling back so that he was on his knees, Grant pressed his hands to his eyes. Cries that seemed inhuman sounded from his mouth as he stared at his best friend, the girl that he'd secretly loved since sixth grade, dead and unmoving on the ground. Soon she'd start to move again, and she'd come for Grant, wanting to consume him. He had a fleeting thought that he shouldn't even put up a fight when she reawakened, he should just let her kill him so they'd still be able to be together.

"Ashley please," he begged, crawling over to her. "Please don't do this to me. Please, please come back. Ash, I need you."

At his voice, she started to stir. He sobbed harder, not ready to see his friend awaken. Her face twitched and her fingers started to scrape against the dirt and her chest moved up with a breath. Grant's grip tightened but loosened immediately on the pistol. How could he shoot his best friend in the head? Before he could think about it too much, Ashley's eyes snapped open, bloodshot and cold. She lunged towards him-

XXX

"Grant," a hand was on his chest, shaking him softly. He turned. "Grant, wake up. You're having a nightmare, wake up. Grant, wake up."

He sat up straight, covered in a cold sweat, chest heaving with great breaths as his scared eyes looked all around him. A tired looking Ashley was sitting next to him, hair frizzy from being in the humidity all day, and eyes were wide. Consolingly, she placed her hand on his chest again.

"You alright?" she whispered. He stared at her for a moment, his eyes going to her neck which was (thankfully) whole. He grabbed her and pulled her to his chest, hugging her hard. She seemed a bit taken aback, but she patted his back consolingly. "Bad dream again?"

"Yeah," he breathed, not wanting to go into details. "But I'm fine."

"Really?" Ashley's hand moved up to rest on his heart, which was beating fast.

"Let's go back to sleep. I'm fine, I promise."

Ashley stared at him, obviously not believing his story, but she shrugged and laid back down. Grant took a moment to stare at the moon, which he could see through a barred up window, trying to control his breathing. He looked down at Ashley, running his hands through her hair without thinking about it. He'd always loved Ash's hair; it was so dark and had so much volume, and in school it had always been controlled by the heat of a straightener and a curling iron, but now it was completely itself, and he loved it even more. He focused on it, willing himself to memorize that one feature of her so he'd always be able to remember it, even if something happened to her.

Lying down, Grant pulled Ashley towards him. One of his arms was under her head and the other was around her waist. He felt her fingers curl around his hand and he closed his eyes at her touch, his muscles relaxing. "Please don't ever leave me." He whispered in her ear, his voice cracking.

"I won't, Grant." Ashley told him, her voice strong. "I won't ever leave you."

With that, he felt at peace. Grant slipped into a deep slumber, focusing on matching his breathing to the steady rise and fall of Ashley's chest.

XXX

"I'll bet you I can hit that walker," Ashley pointed to a particularly large walker that was at the fence of the prison. "From here with a rock."

"Betcha can't," Daryl challenged, kicking the chair he'd drug all the way to the prison tower on its two back legs and smirking competitively. "I've seen ya play basketball and I know ya can't hit nothin'."

Ashley scoffed. "Please, you've obviously mistaken me for Grant. I swear, you'd think that he'd be better at basketball because of his height, but he's the worst player I've ever seen!"

"He just plays to flirt wit' cha." Daryl said knowingly, nodding as he watched Ashley search for a pebble or loose piece of brick to throw at the walkers. Usually she was much more respectful of the undead and tried not to pay much attention to them, but being with Daryl seemed to bring out the childish and ruder side of her. She didn't care or think about the possible feelings of the walkers or of the guilt that should've riddled her with her antics. She just thought about the odd pleasure she got from chucking something hard at a walker and seeing it collapse and get back up, utterly confused. "Ya know that, right?"

"Please, Grant doesn't like me." Ashley shook her head and victoriously yanked a small chunk of brick from the side of the building. Daryl watched her with a calculating look on his face, like he wasn't fully sure how to react to her uniqueness. She marched back over to the side of the guard tower, her thumb drawing a line on the smooth side of her weapon. Daryl stood up and came beside her, scanning the walkers' heads, looking for a special one for Ashley to hit with her rock.

He pointed to one that had a head covered in scraggly hair that was making its way towards the fence and Ashley grinned impishly. "Think you can hit it while it's moving?"

"I know I can." Lining herself up for the throw, Ashley squinted one eye and took a deep breath, something her brother had said he did whenever he had to take free-throws in basketball, then, with a step towards the rail to add to the speed of the object, she threw the piece of brick as hard as she could. A second later, the satisfying and disgusting sound of a skull cracking echoed through the air and the walker dropped. Daryl's eyebrows shot up, and he laughed at Ashley's dumbfounded expression.

"Looks like you didn't expect that to happen,"

"I killed it!" she leapt in the air and turned to stare at Daryl. "I killed it from here with a piece of brick! That was awesome!"

"Calm down, kid," he chuckled, patting her shoulder lightly as he went to go sit down again. Still, Ashley jumped around like a small child on Christmas, bubbling over with excitement at what she'd done. "Ain't cha killed a walker before?"

"Yeah, but not like that!"

"Yer gettin' way too excited!"

"I can't help it I mean I killed a walker by-"

"Ashley, I watched, I know how ya killed the walker." Daryl told her, trying to get her to calm down. He was back in his chair, precariously leaning back on the back two legs with his crossbow near him. Ashley eventually stopped jumping around and settled back in her spot on the ground, since she'd thought it was stupid to bring a chair for watch. Her now sore bottom regretted that decision.

She and Daryl seemed to click instantly-hunting trips could do that. Daryl enjoyed Ashley's quick comebacks to some of his snarky remarks, and Ashley liked everyone that was decent to her. Both of them had been impressed by what the other could do with their weapons and they'd brought back a good sized haul for the group to eat. Supplies were starting to run low even though everyone rationed what they had the best they could and Daryl and Ashley were sent on hunting trips at least once a week.

Grant was okay with not getting to use his weapon very often. He found that he liked doing the small things around the prison, like helping Carol clean or helping Rick and Glenn plan the route for the next run they were to go on. Grant considered Daryl a good guy and he thought that, the more intimidating male friends that Ashley made, the better. He was constantly on watch for Coleman when he was around Ashley.

"What was your favorite book as a kid?" Ashley asked, toying with her knife out of boredom. She was in a particularly good mood this day and she wasn't really sure why, but she figured it had something to do with the tie she felt already to the group she and Grant had joined. They made her feel like she was finally a part of a family again, which made her happy.

"Didn't read much," Daryl grunted, wanting to stay off of the subject of his old life and education; he wanted to forget both of them. Learning had never been stressed in his family, and he figured that he'd just end up working in a motorcycle shop when he got older, earning meager wages that would be just enough for him.

"I was such a nerd, I read all the time. I think my all-time favorite books were the Harry Potter series, anything by John Green (that guy is just amazing, I swear), The Outsiders, and pretty much any romance novel I could get my hands on."

"Only book I bothered to read was Cat in a Hat." Daryl let out a bark of laughter and listened to Ashley's giggles. She was now lying on her stomach, her head on her arms and her eyes on the tree line. "I think Rick wants us ta go on a trip tomorrow,"

"Good! I'm tired of sitting up here, it's so boring! Not that you're not great company, though," Ashley flipped to her back and held her hands and feet up in the air, wincing as her shoulder blades connected uncomfortably with the cement that made up the tower. "I think we should try and get a deer!"

"You seen any deer 'round here?"

She shook her head. "Not really. But still, we should look. They could be just a little further out."

"Wanna drag a deer all the way back here, fer miles?" Daryl questioned, popping his fingers inattentively. Ashley sighed, seeing the flaw in her plan, and shook her head again.

"No…"

"Me neither,"

There was a long pause where the two listened to the birds chirping and some of the guys yelling at each other as they played basketball, but Ashley decided to interrupt it. "Favorite movie?"

"Jesus Christ, girl, ya ever shut up?"

"I thought you knew that I didn't!" Ashley laughed and rolled over on her stomach again, completely bored.

XXX

Rick wiped his brow with the back of his hand and took a step back from the fence in front of him, watching the rest of his group stab walkers. Ashley stood between Grant and Glenn, the muscles of her back tense, her expression one of disgust. Her shirt and pants were soaked through with sweat and blood covered her front-splattered over her face down all the way to her ankles-and she looked like she was about to pass out. The poor girl had obviously never killed so many walkers that were so close to her, and he doubted the horrific smell helped.

Grant, on the other hand, looked like he knew what he was doing. His face was void of expression and his body showed how comfortable he was with doing the job he had to. He was covered in blood, also, and he had to pause for a moment before killing the walker that had stepped over the one he'd just taken down, to shake his head as he tried to get a bit of the excess blood off of him. It flew out of his hair and off of his face and neck, splashing on the ground in small pools. A bit of brain matter was stuck to his cheek, but he didn't seem to notice.

"Carl's killing it," Ashley murmured to Grant as he stepped up beside her again, grimacing at the unintended pun. "It's kinda scary at how good he is at this."

"There's not much skill involved," he replied, also looking at the younger boy. Carl was holding a piece of pipe in his hands, jabbing it through the eyes of walkers as they came to the fence, snapping and growling. He had put his sheriff's hat on his bunk before he came outside so that he wouldn't soil it, and his t-shirt and cargo pants were covered in blood just like everyone else's. He didn't seem too disgusted by what he was doing, and that bothered Ashley.

"Still, he's a child and he's killing walkers like it's no big thing."

Grant shrugged and sighed, looking down at the poker in his hand. Coleman told him that it'd belonged to a man named T-Dog, but he was dead and it was now Grant's; that made him uncomfortable, but he didn't show it in front of Coleman. "It's the world he's grown up in, Ash. Don't think about it too much."

"Don't think about it too much," Ashley mocked softly, preparing to start attacking the walkers again. She tried not to think too much about the slowly increasing number of walkers that she'd killed (as of now, it was thirteen). Rick had ordered that the undead still trapped in the prison block that the group resided in needed to be put down and their bodies burned so they'd no longer pose a threat. When Ashley and Daryl had switched out their positions in the guard tower with Carol and Beth, they'd come back to the prison just in time to get weapons that they were to use for the walkers trapped in a small section that was fenced off in the prison.

Maggie, Glenn, Daryl, Rick, Carl, and Coleman seemed to be killing the walkers with concentration and hate that Ashley had only seen when Grant had stabbed the walker he found feasting on his sister. She remembered more than she wanted to about his hysterical tears and his refusal to leave the body, which was too mangled and damaged to move when it woke up again. Michonne, Ashley, and Grant did their jobs efficiently, but they were nothing compared to the six people full of loathing for the things. Ashley figured she'd have to ask someone later why massacring these things meant so much to this group.

Glenn took a step back from the fence, placing his hands on his hips and squinting into the low sun as he looked over the work that everyone had done. There was one walker left, and Carl drove his iron rod through its eye with a grunt. Ashley leaned back, her hands supporting her back as she popped it. Grant spotted Coleman staring at her, and he immediately put his arm around her waist, pulling her towards him and using his thumb to wipe a bit of blood from above her eyebrow. She sighed and rolled her eyes, pulling away from him like a child does to their mother when they try and kiss them in public.

"Alright, good job everyone. It's getting dark, but I figure we can stack their bodies and start burning them." Rick said as he unlocked the fence, throwing it open and marching inside. Ashley wrinkled her nose and fell in step with Carl, grabbing on to his shoulder as she stepped over bodies. The fear that the walkers' presence provided made Ashley's heart go into a rhythm that was much too fast, but Carl turned and squeezed her hand lightly, holding on to her and aiding her in getting around the dead. She gave him a grateful smile before taking a deep breath, steeling herself to start dragging the bodies out on the basketball court. The aroma of their rotting flesh and brains that were splattered on the ground was anything but satisfying.

"You don't have to do this," Carl told her quietly as she stared down at the body of a young woman with little hair left in a ripped pair of jeans and t-shirt. Ashley shook her head and tried to look as strong as she could.

"I'm okay. Thanks Carl,"

"You're welcome…" he moved off and grabbed the wrists of the smallest walker he could find, pulling it along with, the only weakness he showed were the short breaths he puffed out of his lips. Ashley closed her eyes as she bent her knees down to reach the walker she was going to have to pick up, and she gasped quietly when her fingers wrapped around its slimy, boney wrists.

You can do this. You can do this. Ashley repeated to herself, standing up with her hands around the arms of the female walker. Slowly, she shuffled backwards, wincing at the long line of blood and dirt the body she drug left behind it. Trying to take her mind off of the fate that the woman had come to, she tried to come up with a story behind her. She was a college student majoring in biology that worked out every day because she'd never felt good enough…she liked the color red…she enjoyed reading her textbook with a glass of wine she'd snuck on to campus…she wasn't religious…she was a person, not just a monster.

Daryl walked past her, a body slung over his shoulder like it weighed nothing, and he chuckled at Ashley's expression. "You gonna be alright?"

"I'm fine," she growled through clenched teeth. Her body was still recovering from the stress it'd had to go through in the wilderness, but she felt angry that she wasn't able to pick up the bodies with ease like the others; Carl was the only one that was dragging the walkers he had, and he was four years younger than her. She felt like everyone pitied her.

Rick grunted as he tossed the body of a large walker into the pile that was slowly building, glancing over at Ashley as she walked into his sight. "Need some help?"

"No, I'm fine thanks."

"You don't look it."

"I'm fine." She insisted, giving him a fierce look before putting her hands under the walker's body-cringing-picking it up and throwing it into the pile. She was amazed that her muscles were still able to work so well after she'd had to spend so much time with so little food while burning so many calories, and she scurried back to the yard full of dead walkers, attempting to carry one all the way to the pile. Coleman, whom had two over his shoulder, flicked his chin up when Ashley passed him, a silent hello. She smiled a little, still not sure where she wanted to stand with him.

It was obvious that Grant, who was picking up a fat walker with what looked like ease but Ashley could tell was difficulty, didn't trust him. They had butted heads ever since the two teenagers had joined the group, and Ashley was constantly watching Grant when he was around Coleman so he wouldn't do something that would get them kicked out of the group by picking a fight. Grant was known to do that when he got jealous.

"Ashley, will you help me with this walker?" Maggie called from a little ways away, motioning to one with her toe. Ashley nodded and jogged to her, picking up the walker's feet while Maggie took its arms. They totted it over to the pile, not talking but not feeling the need to. Most everyone was quiet, and it didn't seem that this time, though it was considered a victory, was an event that needed a lot of conversation.

XXX

While the rest of the group assembled in the prison for dinner, Rick and Hershel stood on the basketball court, examining the work that everyone had done. There were three separate piles of walkers because of the sheer amount of the dead that had been trapped behind the fence T-Dog had locked before he was bitten, and they smelled of rotting flesh and looked disgusting, but the two men had small smiles on their faces.

"Is it bad this makes me feel good? To kill all these things, I mean." Rick asked Hershel quietly, not turning towards him, but still staring at the pile with his hand on his pistol. Hershel shook his head.

"Sometimes revenge really is sweet."

Laughing, Rick nodded in agreement. He'd seen just how angry Carl had been when he'd been killing the walkers, and he knew that he was doing it to avenge his mother's death. While Rick had been watching, he'd read the emotions on everyone that had been a part of the group before they came to the prison, and he'd seen just how much massacring these walkers meant to them. It was a way of getting back at the walkers for killing Amy, for making Sophia run away and get bitten, for killing Patricia and Jimmy, for handicapping Hershel, for killing T-Dog, for making Lori go into labor without a doctor around; it meant so much to all of them to get rid of the walkers.

"Ashley seemed like she'd never killed a walker before," Hershel said as he shifted on his crutches, letting out a small breath of discomfort.

"I know. I don't think she's completely used to this kind of stuff,"

"Let's hope she gets better at it, everyone needs to be able to pull their own weight."

"Says the man that can't walk on his own," Rick chuckled and playfully clapped his hand on Hershel's shoulder, looking at him with a grin. "I'm glad I listened to you and Carol, those two are really working out."

"I knew they would." Hershel grinned, but then he turned to look at Rick, his expression serious. "Have you seen how Coleman and Grant are around each other?"

Rick nodded. "They look like they want to kill each other. They both want Ashley's attention."

"So what should we do about that?"

"Let 'em figure it out. Let Ashley choose," Rick knew what this situation was like and he figured it was best to let Ashley choose which guy she wanted to be with; that way there wouldn't be any loose ends for a guy to get the wrong ideas. It would be clean. But, either way, she'd be breaking a heart.

"Do you think Coleman will leave her alone if she stops showing interest in him?" Hershel questioned.

"I guess we'll just have to keep a closer eye on him, 'cause he's not one to settle if he doesn't get his way."