Act 1 Scene 8

Voldemort is laughing drunkenly.

"You are completely trashed!"

"I'll have you know I've never been inhibited my entire life."

"You're funny drunk."

Quirrell: I thought walking home drunk was hard before.

Voldemort: We should have realized that with both of us drinking into one belly we'd get twice as drunk. Hey Quirrell, Quirrell, Quirrell, Quirrell, Quirrell, Quirrell, you remember that girl you were talking, you remember that girl you were talking to while I was talking to her sister on my side?

Quirrell: Oh, so that's why she freaked out when we stood up.

Both: Because she didn't know that we were one person!

"You two are awesome drunk."

The kids burst out laughing as they watched the two actors bend over each other laughing on screen. It was the funniest thing they had seen them do yet.

Quirrell: You know I haven't had this much fun since Nearly Headless Nick's Death Day Party of '91.

"Those are not fun at all."

Voldemort: I haven't had this much fun since, yeah shit I can't ever remember having this much fun!

"Oh, I can think of a couple of times…"

Quirrell: You never had fun, ever doing anything? Maybe that's why you're so evil?

Voldemort: Yeah, maybe, definitely to do with the fact that Muggles and Mudbloods make me sick to my stomach but uh, yeah I guess you could be right I guess. I mean it's kind of funny.

"Oh I'm not evil, I'm just trying to purify this filthy world."

"Shut it your evil."

Quirrell: What is it Voldemort?

Voldemort: Oh it's just that I never-never ever really ever considered another reason for me being so evil because normally I just kill people that try to get me to open up you now. Oops! It's kinda nice to just talk.

Quirrell: You know I have to admit that I was kind of nervous when you demanded to attack yourself to my soul.

"With good reason to young man, with good reason."

Voldemort: Yeah, I could sense that.

Quirrell: But like, now I think it's…kinda cool. It's like having a really close roommate or even a…

Voldemort: Yeah, like a slave, like a, like a Death Eater.

Quirrell: No man,

"I'm getting sick just watching this."

It's like having a friend.

Voldemort: I've never had a friend before.

Quirrell: Looks like you got one now.

Voldemort: Who would have thought at the beginning of this year we would feel like this towards each other? I guess everything is different between us now, huh?

Quirrell: I guess it's plain to see, when you look at you and me. We're different, different as can be.

Both: we simply guarantee when you look at you and me, we're different, different as can be.

Quirrell: It's a comedy of sorts, when you're bound to Voldemort.

Voldemort: And I'm happy as squirrel, as long as I'm with Mr. Quirrell.

"Ha!" The teens were unable to breathe they were laughing so hard at the drunk Voldemort.

Both: We'll lead him to the slaughter and we'll murder Harry Potter. We're different, different, different-different as can be.

Voldemort: Ah ha!

"Wow, we're on nine already. Act 1 is how long?"

"It's fourteen videos long so including this one we have six left before we finish eh first act."

"How long is the second act?"

"It's nine videos so about this long."

"Okay, not too bad but then we have whole other sequel to watch children."

Voldemort will also be leaving after this musical.

"Yes! We get rid of Voldemort!"

"Not permanently Potter since I know you're keeping me alive if I'm ever destroyed again, I get to hunt you down and do what I please…"

So you think Tom Riddle, because after you leave here your memories are being completely destroyed of this event unless you make the changes I've been seeing in you permanent!

"Well, look at that Voldemort, you have to make a decision."