You & Me & a Dog Named Flea Chapter 10 -- My Brown Eyed Angle
Disclaimer : Annie Prouxl owns the timeless characters in BBM. I'm writing from love and making no profit.
Summary : Alternate Universe Fiction of Ennis and Jack (from Brokeback Mountain) set in San Francisco ; Jack Twist had a chance encounter with a veterinarian one day, didn't know the shy vet, and his black and white terrier, would have a permanent place in his heart.
My Deepest Thanks always to Judy, my ultimate beta!
Feedback : means the world to me:)

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It was intense.

Never before in his life had Jack Twist wanted to have more than two hands. Not when he was overloaded with homework back in high school when he remembered he had about four reports to write up over a weekend. Not when he got a bit crazy with the grocery shopping and he ended up with more than three bags to carry home. Not even when he was so mad at Lee he wished he could grow an extra arm like all those X-Men people so he could use it to double the strength of his strangle hold on Lee's neck.

But right now, at this very minute, Jack wished he had five hands. He was cupping Ennis's face with his God-given two hands and kissing him like the world would end tomorrow. Actually, they hadn't done anything but kiss since they fell down on the bed a while ago, with Jack on top. Jack wanted to kiss Ennis's face, his eyebrows, his cheeks, his nose…and maybe bury his face into the golden curls that he loved so much. But he couldn't get enough of Ennis's soft lips, especially when Ennis, with a small sigh, finally opened his mouth and allowed Jack's tongue to slide in. Shit, it felt so good.

The soft moans they were making, plus the sensation from their clothed bodies rubbing, were almost too much. Jack had to clutch a handful of Ennis's hair to release the tension as his tongue met Ennis's for the first time. Jack's toes curled and scratched the sheet like a cat, Ennis's thighs locking his hips right there, and he was writhing uncontrollably just the same. Jack wanted to touch Ennis right there, knead the muscles and feel the strong thighs trembling beneath his touch. Then he wanted to glide Ennis's T-shirt up to his chest because now there was too much cloth between their chests and stomach. He wanted them naked, he wanted to feel the warmth of Ennis's skin.

But he didn't dare to do any of that because he was afraid if he let go of Ennis's face right now, Ennis would spring up and rush out the door. And Jack wouldn't see him again. Damn. This morning he had just promised himself he would give Ennis space and go see him some other time. But when he saw Ennis in front of his apartment tonight, for some reason he hadn't yet had an opportunity to figure out, he just grabbed the man and practically threw him on the bed.

If things got ugly, it would be his fault, again. It seemed Jack Twist was nothing but a troublemaker. Guess that shithead Lee was right.

"Um…" Jack groaned into Ennis's mouth when Ennis's hands dug beneath his shirt, the warmth from his palms burning his naked flesh. One of his hands moved down to his flank while the other hand oh my fucking God slid past his sensitive nipple and rested on the middle of his chest. Jack felt a little push of that palm and he stopped kissing, panting a little as Ennis's lips moved and he whispered quietly into his mouth, "What're we doing?"

Ennis's voice was weak as he swallowed the taste of Jack down his throat, trying to slow his speedy heartbeat down to a normal pace before he had a heart attack. He couldn't look at Jack, even when he knew all he would see might just be the shadow of his face since they were in the darkened room. Not after he realized he had let thing go too far with them lying on the bed together kissing and sucking the living soul out of each other. He had never kissed anyone until his lips swelled and hurt this much but now he couldn't even speak. He thought if he moved his lips, they might crack and burst.

But also with his eyes closed like this, it made things all too vivid. Jack's weight was pinning him down, their bodies pressed tightly from the waists down. Jack's breath came short and hot on his mouth, his hands lightly rubbed his cheeks and moved up and down and around like he wanted to touch more but was afraid to do so. The thought made his whole body throb like he was electrified. Ennis shuddered and Jack felt it, he moaned and their hips met in short crazy thrusts that squeezed more groans from Ennis. And they went at it again, kissing and rubbing and thrashing about on the small bed.

The consequences be damned.

Cursing, Jack finally let his body act the way he really wanted. Like letting a bird out of a cage, he moved his hands down and fiddled open his belt and buttons before doing the same with Ennis's. It was like a small wrestling match when both of them tried to rip off each other's clothes, socks and shoes but didn't want to stop touching.

And it happened. Jack gasped as he was flipped on his stomach. He felt Ennis nudge his opening and clamped his eyes shut. Oh my God. What he had been craving was about to happen. The connection between two bodies, something he had been avoiding with Brent when they were together. Brent, the man whom he had been dating, the man whom he thought was that special someone. He'd told himself he wasn't ready but here he was, letting Ennis do it and placing himself at his mercy. Ennis…Ennis… Ennis whom he had just called a friend two weeks ago. Ennis who had come to see him with his soup and bring him little Flea when he was sick.

Jack didn't want to think any more. Suddenly, he let go of everything, the terrible phonecalls with Brent and Lee that had been another clear reminder of how he had been an asshole were like a long-lost history. Right now all he wanted was part of Ennis in him, wanted it so bad the way he had never wanted anything before.

And he thought he stopped breathing when Ennis entered him. Ennis's groan vibrated on his back as Jack shuddered, panted into the pillow, hands clutching the sheet and pushing back with the strength he had left. It hurt like hell but Jack wouldn't stop moving. He wanted this to happen.

Within a second, Jack was seeing stars swirling under his eyelids when the intense, bittersweet ecstasy hit him like a wild wave. He was so lost, he didn't hear how frantic and loud their outcries were as they rocked together until they both reached the releasing point. All he knew was this was what he wanted and as they lay down on the bed, spent, Jack smiled. Maybe he didn't need to try so hard to reach for the sky anymore. He had found where he belonged, under Ennis, under the wings of this brown-eyed angel who would lift him up from the ground and take him to the sky so high, high until he could touch the stars.

And he fell into a blissful sleep, tangled in the warmth of another man's limp arms and legs and he thought he had dreamt about flying. He might turn into a looney but he didn't care 'cause in his dream, under the bright blue sky, he could fly and finally catch up with the kite he had lost when he was a child.

But it seemed like a dream. Jack stirred in the middle of the night, there was nothing in his hands and he was alone in the bed. Ennis had gone and he should have known. It was the 21st century, there were no such things as angels.

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It was noon and Jack decided to give himself a little reward by ordering some Japanese to go, enough to feed a starving army; six California rolls, six teriyaki chicken rolls, six cucumber rolls and three tuna rolls plus a big bowl of wakame salad that would go very well with the bottle of Buena Vista's Sauvignon white wine which was given to him by one of the sponsors of the food column.

He had spent this week's grocery shopping money for this lunch but he didn't care. He deserved this. 'Cause despite the bad day yesterday, the brief moment of happiness before the crude wake-up call by reality plus the numb pain in his ass that made him walk funny, Jack Twist still could behave properly. He woke up, shaved –and didn't cut himself either- dressed to kill in black, grabbed an espresso and went to work on time.

If that kind of reason could be used in consideration for this year's 'Employee of the Year' award, he was going to win the damn thing for sure.

Grimacing, Jack put down the glass of wine when he heard footsteps getting nearer to the editorial department where he was alone. He tried to hide the glass behind the computer screen and kept the bottle down under the desk. It was lunchtime and he was pretty sure nobody would say anything if they spotted him drinking it but he'd better be sure…

It was a young woman from the advertising department, he remembered. She stepped into the room and smiled, "Oh, you're here. Somebody's here to see you."

"Me?" His voice was a bit high. Well, he was mock surprised at this.

"Yes. I told him it's lunchtime but he said it's important."

"He?"

"Yes. He's waiting at the guest corner now."

Then she was gone.

It was a bad time to feel nausea especially when you had just swallowed over 30 dollars worth of lunch. So Jack had to close his eyes for a moment to compose himself. He wasn't expecting any He today. Maybe his bad luck still continued and Brent was here, came back early from his business trip and was ready to bang him in the head. Or maybe Ennis came to say he was quitting Newsome Publishing, didn't want anything to do with him anymore after last night.

Last night…

But it wasn't like Jack had tied Ennis up and forced him to do what they did. And they weren't drunk or delirious or anything. What was more, Jack remembered the cuddling. He was sure they were wrapped in each other's arms after everything was said and done, Ennis's arms dangling around his torso at first, all jelly-like, as if he had no bones. But when Jack scooted closer, buried his nose in Ennis's neck, he thought he felt the squeeze around his back and that was why he swung his arms around Ennis's waist and hugged tight, too. Jack wouldn't dare to do something like that if there was no encouragement, unless he was drunk or high, which he wasn't.

So why did he leave?

Well, first, Ennis wasn't gay. Picture it, Twist, he told himself. What if it wasn't something Ennis wanted but he was kind of dragged into it. What if you were straight, visited a friend and woke up the next day with a man lying beside you? And his hair stood up at that thought. God, he clamped his eyes shut, refused to make up things in his head any further. Jack Twist knew how to look at things on the bright side or he couldn't have survived until today. Right? So…how about Ennis left because…maybe he had a nightshift to cover?

Yeah, that would do.

Sweeping the rest of the wine down his throat, Jack twisted his neck and ankles, stretched his fingers and jumped up like an athlete ready for the big game. Well, he was alive, wasn't he? And he had been behaving real well since morning. Jack Twist wasn't going to fear the worst right now because he didn't want to discourage Jack Twist's high moral state. Besides, that He might be some other He who wouldn't bring bad news. It could be Grant, bringing him another bottle of wine saying, 'Hey, know what, Lee was tied onto a rocket and was sent out of this world from Hanger 18 this morning, let's celebrate!"

"Hell, yeah." Jack jumped up and punched the air then, gaining some more self-confidence before he stepped out and greeted his unexpected guest. But he couldn't utter any words once the young man in a plain black T-shirt and dark blue jeans who was holding the computer laptop to his chest turned to him.

"If you didn't work for a publishing company, I would never in this life come to see you," Lee said and Jack noticed his red nose and eyes which were obviously not from allergy. "And I'm not here to say I'm sorry. Do you know how PageMaker works?"

Jack shrugged, totally in the mood to play. He had nothing to lose anyway. "It depends. And why should I help you?"

"I'm not asking for help."

"Oh yeah? Sure. So why are you here?"

Silence. Jack wasn't the type of man who generally enjoyed torturing someone but right now he had to admit it felt good being in control. Lee looked at him sharply, "This's my damn homework and it's cause of you Grant kicked me out!!" he blurted out.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but I wasn't the one sneaking on his cell phone."

"So how long are you planning on continuing this shit then? Aren't you happy now that I did the nasty job for you?"

"What…"

"And then you can get away with that vet boyfriend of yours and now everybody hates me. You happy?"

"That's the price for shoving your nose into other people's business," Jack said, but his voice didn't come out as sharp as he wanted. Lee was right again. Dumbass always knew how to scold him at the right moment. Shit, he wasn't even sure if had Brent called him last night, whether he would have been brave enough to tell him the truth right away. Shaking his head, he murmured, even softer, "And that vet you're talking about, he isn't my boyfriend."

"The hell you say."

"The hell I say."

They went quiet again and Jack sighed, "Grant…kicked you out?"

Lee didn't answer, his mouth was occupied by nail-biting activity, Jack observed. He sighed again, "It doesn't seem like him. Grant never gets angry. And he and you were…close."

"So I won the fucking lottery. What's the big deal?"

Lee shrugged like it was nothing but his eyes turned glassy and Jack gasped. The man dragged his sleeve over his eyes and sniffed, lifted his chin up again, "So do you know how PageMaker works or what?"

Jack didn't answer. He simply snatched the laptop from Lee and walked back to his desk.

Ten minutes later, Jack finally looked up rom the computer screen. He had fixed Lee's problem on PageMaker already. He was somewhat familiar with it, enough to help out a clueless friend.

Friend? Oh Jack Twist, Lee and you were never friends. Rolling his eyes at his own thoughts, Jack glanced at Lee who was sitting quietly beside him, looking around blankly. Lee wasn't wearing black eyeliner today and that made him look pale like he was sick and was strangely…tame. Jack knew it wasn't him doing this to Lee. He was doing it to himself but he couldn't help but feel like he had a part in this. "You going to learn to do this by yourself or what?"

Jack expected Lee to blurt something out but he simply scooted closer and looked at the screen blankly, again. Jack showed the man how to solve the problem nonetheless.

The lunch hour was almost over when Lee started to pack his stuff. Jack fixed his eyes on the younger man and wondered why although they had known each other for more than a year, he had never noticed the mole on Lee's cheekbone before. Or was it him that had been into himself, too? Guess he wasn't the only one who craved love and support then. Everybody wanted that. And we all had our own ways to gain it, babies kicking their legs in the air, cats rubbing against people's legs. Maybe that was why Lee always hung around Grant and made him laugh with his stupid jokes. Lee wanted to be wanted, too.

And maybe that was why Lee was here. When you lost your ally, another round of fighting with your foe could prove that you still existed.

But still why did Lee have to act so unreasonably stupid…?

Jesus, suddenly things started to make sense, all the things about why the hell Lee was angry at him and took things so personally with Grant…

"Shit," Jack said, wide eyes looking at Lee like he had grown a third head. "Oh my…"

"What?!?"

"Shit." Jack rubbed his face. "You…Grant? Oh my God, oh my God. Why don't you…? Shit."

"I'm what?!?"

"You like Grant?!?!"

"No!" Lee shouted, thank God the office was empty. He was about to shout some more but seeing Jack's panicked expression and hearing his unstoppable curses somehow shut his mouth.

Numbly, Jack looked up at Lee again. "Grant…knows?"

Lee laughed, "Very funny."

But when Jack didn't laugh, Lee kinda slumped back, head down and he looked completely defeated. "He'll laugh at me."

"You know Grant. We both know him. He's not going to laugh. He won't."

"Maybe he won't but what's the point?"

"What do you mean?"

No answer again. Jack bit his lip and watched Lee pack his stuff in silence. Lee sensed his glare and stared back, he looked back and forth between Jack and his laptop. "Thanks…" he murmured. "But I'm not saying sorry for last night."

"I don't expect that from you."

"Good."

"Call him."

"It's none of your business."

"Oh yeah? Since it seems that you thought my business is your business, you should expect the same treatment in return. Call him."

Lee sighed, his body seemed to shrink. "Did."

"And?"

"Since when do I have to report everything I did to you?"

That was Lee's way of saying 'He hung up on me', 'He didn't speak to me' or 'He didn't answer the phone' , Jack knew it. Footsteps, lots of footsteps were going here and there and it was telling them the lunch break time was about to be over. Lee got up, pointed to the men's room and headed there.

Damn, Jack wanted another glass of wine at this point and his face might be showing something 'cause then Alma, who had just gotten back from lunch, frowned at him, her sweet doll-like face painted with amusement.

"What are you thinking, Jacky? You look funny."

"Nothing. You look great. Have I told you I like it when you tie your hair up?"

Alma smiled and waved as if she didn't believe what he'd said. But her cheeks turned cherry-pink. Jack blinked slowly as he watched her untie her hair, roughly run her hands through it and tie it up again.

No, he couldn't do this any more. He couldn't destroy another relationship, not this one.

"Alma? You still want to try that new restaurant on Fillmore?"

Her smile went broader, "Of course! But I can't tonight. I'm going to dine with my dad. He's in town for a couple of days."

"How about tomorrow?"

"Great! Oh! It's been like a decade since we last ate out together!"

"Yeah." Jack grinned. He was going to talk to Alma about Ennis. No more lying and dancing around. She was his friend and he didn't want to fuck things up again. And he thought about Grant and Lee as Alma brought out her little cosmetic bag.

"You have some eyeliner?"

Alma looked astonished but handed her eyeliner to him anyway. Jack went to the men's room, knocked at the only stall that was shut.

"Go see Grant." He slid the eyeliner through the space between the floor and the door, watching it disappear inside. "And don't use up all of this."

Jack didn't wait for any response and went straight back to his desk. Well, Lee had told Brent, only God knew how much damage that man had done but at least it was the end. He would have to tell Alma tomorrow, not something he looked forward to but it was something he had to deal with. He might have to talk with Brent again when he came back. But Grant and Lee would have their own conflict to work on now, and that would leave him by himself for a while to settle things with Ennis. That Ennis Del Mar, even with his sweet brown eyes and heaven-sent smile, couldn't get away with this, not after the kiss they shared and the warm night they had spent in the same bed together…not after the connection they had made. No way.

Several more minutes passed and Lee finally walked back to Jack's desk, eyes coated with black eyeliner the way Jack used to see. And he had to suppress a smile when he noticed Lee's hair was wet and spiky. The man had done something to it, too, the phoenix rising from the ashes.

"I still hate you," Lee said, gathering his belongings. Jack smirked.

"And I still hate you."

Exchanging one last satisfied nod, the foes parted, both knowing they would act like nothing had happened today. And that was fine, really. He could pretend he had never seen Lee without his mask of thick black eyeliner on and they could continue their forever-foe, hate-hate relationship and wring each other's neck the next time they met. Why not? The kid wasn't that bad, well, as a foe, was he?

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"Don't look at me like that."

Ennis narrowed his eyes at Flea who was pleading with his big, deep brown eyes, whining and wagging his tail on the floor.

"You can't go there. They don't allow any pets inside," Ennis said, shifted to sit Indian style and scooted closer to the little dog, a thick book in his hand. "This is not your food. You shouldn't eat it. Now I have to find the new one for Mona. Don't do this again, you hear?"

Flea wagged his tail faster then, barked twice. His eyes followed the book in Ennis's hand like it was his dinner. Sighing, Ennis glanced up to Martha behind the counter. The black woman shrugged, "Don't look at me. I can't make him say yes, either."

Ennis chuckled then, realized for the first time that he was speaking with a dog, at seven in the morning at the clinic. Their night shift was over and they were about to call it a day. From the look on Martha's face, Ennis knew she wanted to go home to get some sleep. He was tired, too, but he recalled he had to go to the bookstore and buy a new copy of 'Are you happy?' for Mona. Flea had eaten a part of it and the whole book was torn and scratched and soaked like…well…like a dog had been chewing on it.

Martha had asked why he let that happen. He didn't answer, couldn't answer and he remembered doing anything to keep his hands and head busy all night so that he didn't have to think about it. But the truth was there was no way he could pretend something hadn't happened that night.

He had slept with Jack.

He had kissed the man, had fallen on the bed with him and had done it. Christ! Ennis put his face in his hands and groaned. Oh my God, he couldn't even begin to think how the hell it had happened. What had he been thinking? Had he even been thinking? And he had fucking flipped Jack on his stomach and had done it, just like that. Ennis kneaded his head harder, totally into his thought. How the heck could he look Jack in the eyes after that night? Jesus, he couldn't even think of the pain he had caused Jack, Jack whose body had been so warm against him. Jack who had kissed him so softly and had hugged him like he was the best thing that had ever happened. But look what he had done. Goddamn. He shook his head, shit, what had happened to him? Or had he always wanted to do that with men?

Hell, no! He had never been attracted to any men before, let alone touched and kissed a man.

Or is it just because it's Jack?

"Ennis, you going home now?" Martha's voice shot through his foggy brain and Ennis's head jerked up. He blinked and sighed with relief that she wasn't looking at him as she asked that question. She was busy putting the paper files in the cabinet, her back to Ennis.

"I will wait for Drew so Flea will have someone to stay with when I go to the bookstore."

"But it won't open until like ten or something."

"I can take a nap here or I can just go for a cup of coffee to kill some time," Ennis said. "You can go home."

"That ok with you, Doc?"

"Yep." Ennis smiled a little and welcomed Flea in his arms, didn't say a word now even when the little dog started to chew on the other corner of the book again.

He was still sitting on the floor with Flea when the front door of the clinic opened. A big man about 40 years old with a bald head walked into the clinic and the sight of him stirred both Ennis and Martha onto their feet.

"Dr. Brown!" Martha almost squealed. "Oh, you're back already! How's everything?"

"Dr. Brown." Ennis greeted the older man softly and earned a pat on the shoulder as Dr. Noel Brown, Alma's godfather and the original writer of Jack's doggie column, turned to smile warily at Martha.

"Things are still a bit crazy. You know how kids can give you headache."

"When did you come back, sir?"

"Last night. How's everything?"

"Very good." Martha nodded Ennis's way. "We keep everything under control."

"So I've heard. Right." He looked at Ennis then. "Read your column. It's good."

Ennis ducked his head down, murmuring, "Thank you…" He didn't look up for an instant though 'cause he knew Martha was smiling. She always teased him about this doggie column thing every chance she got.

"But don't you think it's a bit general? I mean, yeah, it's nice writing about animals as princesses and all, but don't you think it should be a little more educational?"

Huh?

"Oh, no offense here, Ennis. But something is lacking there. In the second column about cats, you could add a part about the popular breeds in the U.S. or something like that."

Breeds?

"I first imagined this column as something like a health journal, where every animal lover can learn more about their pets. Like…oh yes, you can add details on…"

"But I think Dr. Del Mar is doing just fine with that, Dr. Brown." It was Martha. Ennis didn't expect that and obviously neither did Dr. Brown. He frowned at her as she assured, "He's doing a great job. Jack thinks so."

"Jack?"

Shit.

"Oh, he's the man in charge of the column."

"Oh." Dr. Brown turned to him and they met eyes briefly before he nodded. "Very well then. But if you think it's too much trouble with you working the night shift and everything, you can always tell me. I feel guilty here. You're not supposed to be doing this. You still want to do this?"

Do I want to do this?

Ennis averted his eyes to Martha who looked at him worriedly, he almost could see her mouth 'yes' to him behind one of the paper files that she was holding up. Dr. Brown crooked his brow and Ennis found himself nodding his head.

"I'm ok, Dr. Brown. It's not a burden really."

It's not. I like writing just fine. And Jack told me I'm good at this.

"Yeah? You know I can always talk to Alma, my beautiful goddaughter. She will understand."

Ennis shook his head again, "That's alright, Dr. Brown." Me and Jack are working together just fine. I like Jack's company. We like each other's company. "Unless you feel like…"

"No, no, that's not what I mean. I'm relieved, to tell you the truth. Are you sure then?"

Ennis shrugged and gained a nod from Dr. Brown.

"That's settled. But I think we should have more copies of that magazine here. We can frame the column and put copies in the waiting area."

Christ, "Um…I don't think it's…"

"I have to call them. What's the name of that magazine again?"

"Soul Singing," declared Martha.

"Yes. That's it. And oh, any ideas for the next column yet?"

"Um…" Ennis fiddled with the hem of his shirt. He hadn't said anything when Dr. Brown blurted out, "How about joint disease in dogs?"

Huh?

Dr. Brown probably saw his stunned expression 'cause he stopped talking and cleared his throat. "Sorry, I've got too much information in my head. I just want to make sure I didn't dump my job on you. But if you enjoy writing that, you do it."

Ennis simply nodded and Dr. Brown patted his shoulder again before going upstairs, talking on his cell phone that had just rung. Ennis looked down at his feet and up to Martha, exchanged a small knowing smile with her. Even she knew he was happy working for Jack. Maybe he didn't have to try so hard to pretend about this.

He looked at Flea, who had abandoned the book to play with his pink ball, and bent to pick it up. The front page was soaked with Flea's saliva. He would have to buy the new book and return it to Mona the next time they met. It could keep him busy at least for the morning, though he still wondered how he could close his eyes and sleep when he arrived home…

Thinking about sleep reminded him of that night again, not the frantic cloth-ripping wrestling, lip-bruising kissing or the like that made him blush like a virgin, but the feeling of someone snuggling next to him, the steady breath that tickled his neck, reminding him he wasn't alone in the cold night.

Yap Yap!

Flea barked then and Ennis kneeled down, feeling his will melt from the little dog's innocent look.

"Alright…" He heard Martha laugh and he chuckled with her. "Um...I'll take him with me then."

"As you wish, Doctor."

Ennis smiled and nodded at her, opened the door and practically followed Flea up the hill, and like every day, kept his eyes on the pavement and counted his footsteps. The same fat grey pigeon with a tiny yellow tag around one of her legs strolled beside him, as always, and he laughed when Flea chased her away with his sharp bark.

His head was strangely lighter now 'cause in the depth of confusion, Ennis knew one thing. He didn't want to give up writing for Jack. And that should mean something…

They turned right at the corner and headed to the coffee shop and Ennis wasn't surprised to see Jack Twist himself standing right there, two cups of coffee-to-go in his hands. Flea rushed to him, as always, so Ennis slowly walked up with his long stride as Jack put the coffee cups down on the empty outdoor table and scooped Flea up in his arms.

They looked down to the ground, then at each other, and both decided to keep their eyes on Flea, who was looking around with interest, panting against Jack's shoulder.

"You remember Dr. Brown?" Ennis asked softly and Jack nodded. "He came back."

"Oh," Jack felt a sharp tang in his chest. "You…going to stop writing? The column?"

Uncertain blue eyes sought some clues from the brown ones. Ennis didn't answer right away, he took the leash out of his jeans pocket and attached it to Flea's collar, muttering as if talking to Flea, "About that night…I…"

"You don't have to say anything," Jack whispered. "It's not your…I mean…I wanted it to happen. It was pretty obvious, wasn't it? Damn, Ennis, it's not like everybody has to know…"

Ennis pressed his lips together, watching as Jack freed the dog to wander within the limits of his leash. He looked up at the table and the two cups of coffee. How long Jack had been waiting for him here anyway?

"You don't hate me, right?" Jack asked and Ennis sighed. In all of this confusion, if there was one thing he knew for sure, it was that he didn't hate Jack.

"If I did, I would have killed you dead already last night when you…" A red trail crept up from his neck to his ears and Ennis bit his bottom lip. Jack craned his neck and grinned.

"So I thought," he said. "I want to try this with you, Ennis. I know you ain't gay and everything, but can you give us a chance. After last night, I knew you felt something, too. Right? Ennis?"

Ennis stared at Jack and then bounced his glance away to the cups of coffee again. He felt Jack's eyes follow. "How long've you been waiting?"

Jack was pretty much used to the way Ennis changed the topic when he was uncertain and uncomfortable. So he simply shrugged and went along with the new direction, waiting, 'cause he knew Ennis would come around. "Three, four minutes, maybe."

"You know…" Ennis started again, slowly and cautiously. "I've been thinking about…stuff."

"About the happiness in your life?"

Ennis chuckled despite everything and waved the torn book in his hand that Jack had already seen somehow.

"Yep."

"I see you've been carrying it around."

"Mona gave it to me yesterday." Ennis tugged Flea's leash when he tried to chase another dog that passed. "Come here, you little devil. You aren't going to get away with this."

Jack snorted, "He ate the book?"

"Drooled over it like it was puppy food."

"How the hell…" Jack stopped short when Ennis's ears turned red again. "Oh, that. Sorry about that…Damn."

"Anyway," Ennis cleared his throat. "I've been thinking about stuff, like, this and that and…stuff, you know. Something I have been avoiding."

"Yeah?"

"And I thought it's about time I start the…discovery…"

Jack watched Ennis fiddle with the leash and inhaled deeply. He didn't need to be Einstein to know what this 'discovery' was all about. "Let's do this together?"

Their eyes locked and Ennis blinked, pressed his lips together tightly again, "I can be so dumb sometimes you wouldn't imagine."

Jack looked down at his boots, hiding his smile, "I can handle that."

"Do you realize what you're saying?" Ennis shook his head. "It might turn out…badly. What if…I figure out I am not…like that after all?"

"We don't know that."

Jack just stared at Ennis with his huge eyes and Ennis tucked his hands in his jacket pockets, willing himself not to look away. They stayed like that for a while, not talking, not moving.

"I'm a man, Ennis. I can take things like a man." Ennis still didn't move so Jack jerked his head toward the coffee cups, "How about a morning stroll with hot espresso for a start?"

Not waiting for Ennis's answer, Jack picked up the cups and handed one to Ennis, who murmured a soft thank you.

Flea led both of them down the little slope and Ennis found himself relaxing more as they walked down the street, breathing in the cool air of the morning in December. The espresso was good and hot and it kept his body warm. They didn't talk much, just exchanged eye contact and then Ennis remembered about the column.

"You think I can write about dogs helping out with social activities?"

Jack frowned so Ennis told him more about the social activity that had been postponed from last week, the one where they took friendly dogs and cats to visit the old people at the care home and let them play together.

"That's a great idea. We can add pictures, too, you know." Jack smiled, "So, you still wanna write for me?"

Ennis shrugged and shuffled his feet as they stopped at the crossroad. "Guess so. Um…you wanna go? There? Too?"

"With you?"

"With us?" Ennis tugged Flea's leash and Jack smiled wider.

"You and me and Flea? I'd love to."

And Ennis felt his heart skip a beat. "Okay. It's on Saturday."

"So Saturday it is."

"Um…"

They met eyes again and Jack's gaze went up to Ennis's temple where the cool breeze ruffled his curls until they tangled here and there looking untidy but incredibly…cute.

Maybe there is such thing as angels after all.

Jack didn't realize he had reached out with his free hand until he saw Ennis's puzzled stare. But it was too late. He touched those curls and quickly brought his hand down and coughed with embarrassment, saw Ennis look around but it seemed nobody noticed. He smiled sheepishly, "I can get so carried away sometimes you wouldn't imagine."

"Shit."

And they laughed a little at that. The light turned green and Flea led them once more onto the pavement of the other side of the street. Ennis didn't know what to expect from this 'discovery' of his true self, but, well…

Here I go.

TBC

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Thank you all for reading. Thanks esp. to Belegwathiel--who seems to be my only one reader in fanfiction dot net. LOL Thanks also to WCUgirl for saying hi:) (see you around in livejournal!!)