Part X
11:15 PM
Alex Kelly had been sitting on the sofa for almost an hour now. She found herself wondering what to do next.
What to say next.
Knowing that something is between her and Marissa didn't help.
It was supposed to help. But then, Kaitlin was in the picture.
She sighs.
How could she choose? Or should she choose?
She hasn't told Marissa about their latest predicament since the latter had to check if her sister was fine and in bed. She was told to wait on the Cooper living room, by herself. Given enough time to ponder about the situation, she decided she had to talk to the older Cooper first hand.
She didn't want to end something in case there was something. She didn't want to let Marissa go. Alex didn't want to hurt Kaitlin either.
So what now?
"She's asleep… Damn I hate Ryan…" Marissa came down the stairs and went straight to sitting beside the blonde.
She was still oblivious. But then, worrying about her sister kept her preoccupied.
"We need to talk…" Alex began, turning to the girl sitting next to her.
"About?"
"Your sister…"
"And here I was hoping we were going to talk about us…" Marissa replied with a sad smile but listened regardless.
"I'm not going to back away from us. I want us. So that it clears that idea. But we have something to think about first. But that doesn't mean we should forget about us. I don't want to just let go of us…" The blonde smiled feeling Marissa leaning towards her.
There was silence. Good silence. For her part Marissa was waiting for what was next. But she knew as calculating as the class president is, Alex was formulating the words to say something really important.
Alex sighed.
"Kaitlin sent the letter."
"What? Why? How? Wha…" Marissa in shock looked at her incredulously.
"I guess she was harboring the feelings in secret…"
"Maybe she was just joking?"
It was a question full of hope. Alex knew Marissa was going to be torn. But she had to reiterate once more.
"She's not. And for the record I like you, Marissa. Stop whatever it is you're thinking."
"But…"
"She told me because she wanted to tell me. Not because she wanted to be with me… I think she knew I kind of had a thing for you. Maybe even before I knew it…"
A sad smile crept into Marissa's face. Alex made her turn to her. The blonde's eyes were equally sad.
"What's wrong?"
"She knew I liked you, you know. She was always trying to push me to at least let you know. Or show you I was interested. She never said anything. I…" A tear made its way, by then, Marissa couldn't hold back anymore.
Her chest was burning. How could she not know?
"You and me both…" Alex replied then kissed Marissa's forehead.
"I don't want to hurt her Marissa, but I don't want to hurt us as well… I spoke to you first because we're older, because we're the ones who mutually like each other. I like Kaitlin, yes but not as much as you. Not this way anyway."
A smile formed in Marissa lips as she placed a gentle kissed to the blonde's lips.
"I want you… But how do we do this Alex?"
"Kaitlin knows what we feel. I'm sure she already regrets drinking all that alcohol that led to her outburst..."
"Outburst?"
"You were talking to someone when we got to Ryan's. I got inside just in time to hear her scream her feelings. What she really thought… It's ok… It won't change the way I feel about you… It's just. Well… Things have gone complicated before we could even establish that we're together. Not to mention it's our first and only date ever recorded so far…"
Marissa blushed but listened nonetheless.
"I want to try this with you… But I hate starting it with people sulking secretly in the corner. I mean if it's another person, Marissa believe me, I'd say go to hell. But it's Kaitlin. Our Kaitlin…"
"I know…"
Silence fell upon them once more. And by the time the clock read 12:00, Marissa was lying on Alex's lap, while the blonde stared at the small glint of light from the Cooper fireplace.
"Marissa…"
"Yeah?"
"Is it ok if we wait till we get to Yale?"
"What do you mean, Alex?"
"I mean wait till we get to college and have the formal dates and stuff…"
"And stuff?" Marissa made a smug smile that made Alex Kelly pout.
"I mean, we could go out now, keeping things in the minimum that is till Kaitlin somehow gets used to the fact and let it go."
"Do you think she can, Alex? I mean don't get to cocky when I say this, but now that I have your interest, well, I'm not really into letting you lose it."
"Marissa, she's what 15? 17? She just thinks she likes me or loves me as she wrote. She would have told me herself if she wanted me."
"But she did that because she knew I liked you too."
"But then, that only meant I wasn't important enough to be in between you both. But she loves us though."
"I know…"
"Because she wanted us to find each other… In that sense anyway…"
"Alex…"
"Hmmm….?"
Marissa's hand rested on Alex's cheek. The blonde looked down at her questioningly. Alex's fingers were gently running through her hair.
"Do you love me?"
"Is that a trick question Cooper?"
"No, Kelly."
Marissa saw Alex looking away perhaps pondering the right words to say. Typical Alex Kelly, always the perfectionist.
"I think I do… But don't get me wrong… I'm utterly excited to find out…" Alex replied giving Marissa another kiss.
"So what's next for us then?"
"Well, we have to talk to Kaitlin first. Ask her if she's ok about the reality that we are going to go out with each other. We have to let her know we'll still be there for her. Knowing your sister, she would say its fine. But you and I both know…"
"She's just keeping things bottled up inside…" Marissa finished the sentence which earned a smirk for the blonde.
"So we both need to assure her we'll still be there to listen. I think if we take things slow she'll make it till we get to Yale. At least she'll be looking for things to do to make her busy. You know how she is…"
"I know…" Marissa smiled knowingly how her sister handled stress.
1:00AM
She was sitting at the top of the stairs hugging that lone teddy bear her older sister gave her. She heard everything. And somehow, through her tears she felt relief. It was the reason they were meant to be together. It was real reason why she tried to make them reveal their feelings for one another. It was simply because she loved them both, equally. Kaitlin didn't know how else to describe her feelings now. She was heartbroken, and yet, she knew, she was going to be alright.
6:00AM
The aroma of brewed coffee filled the room making them both stir.
"Agh! I forgot to call! My mom's going to freak!" Alex stood up so abruptly it made Marissa fall off the couch.
"Alex!"
The blonde mouthed sorry then went on to her phone call.
Proceeding to the kitchen, Marissa Cooper found her little sister making breakfast.
"Smells good sis," getting a bite off the pancake,
"Tastes good as well..."
"Thanks…"
Kaitlin watched as her older sister took bite after bite with a smile. The youngest Cooper cleared her throat then she began.
"I'm going to be alright sis…"
"Hmm…?"
"I'm going to be alright, with the notion that you're going out with Alex…"
"Kaitlin…"
"Really… Honest…"
Marissa looked at her little sister with a sad smile.
"I'm going to be fine because you both love me. That's more than I'll ever want."
Marissa stood up and gave her sister a loving hug. She kissed her temple twice then said.
"Well, we're going to love you no matter what…"
A smile was all there is to it.
Kaitlin knew she made the right decision too.
-Fin-