Hide and Seek

Sans, Undyne and Papyrus carried Gaster's would-be dead body over to Hotland.

"Hotland suuuucks!" Undyne exclaimed.

The trio carried Gaster's body to the giant metal building that Alphys stayed. They passed the water tank that Undyne recently stole, and slammed Gaster into the entrance. They had no respect for the guy. They just bashed his dead body against the entrance because his bones were "TWICE NORMAL DENSITY, SCIENCE BIATCH".

Once Alphys opened the door from their continuous knocking, Sans wasn't as tall as Undyne or Papyrus, so when he helped carry Gaster into the building, he accidentally smacked Gaster's skull into the side of the door.

"SANS! DO IT PROPERLY!" Papyrus chided.

"hey, not my fault im hella short." Sans replied.

"J-J-J-Jesus, g-g-guys..." Alphys stammered, "Isn't that a-a-a-a little bit o-o-overkill?"

Gaster's jaw hung out. The ghost in him yelled, "STooopp sTTTUTERrinnnGg!"

"Look who's talking..." Alphys muttered.

"We heard you're good at Photoshop." Undyne said.

Sans raised a brow. ""we heard"? undyne, you were the one who specifically told us—"

"Hey, shut up. The negotiator's talking." Undyne told Sans before turning to Alphys. "So, as I was saying, we heard you were good with Photoshop."

Alphys stared up at Undyne with half-closed eyes.

"Heard?" she repeated.

"Uh..."

"Don't lie! You watched me photoshop Sans on those pictures!" Alphys exclaimed.

"that was you? i thought it was gaster." Sans said.

"It was probably him. I mean, I didn't release any pictures of you, right? All of it were private." Alphys said, covering up some shady stuff. "Moving on..."

"private? girl, what nasty shit did you pull with fish lady over here?" Sans demanded.

"Well, I-I guess I c-c-can't—ugh, why can't I stop stuttering—anyway, here are the Photoshops I did." Alphys displayed it over her desktop. "Recognize any?"

"ho-ho-ho-hoo..." Sans chuckled, pointing at one picture. "is that really the eiffel tower? geez, thanks man." He high-fived the memelord. "woah, undyne, is this christmas?"

"Uh..." Undyne trailed off.

"cause your fish butt is grounded. why didnt you show me this earlier?" Sans demanded.

"Dude, what the hell?" Undyne glared at the two short people.

"I FEEL LEFT OUT." Papyrus admitted.

"Hey, Chara, how do you say your name?"

"What do you mean? You're saying it."

"No, I mean, do you pronounce it "Kara" or "Tshara"?"

"Whatever. You just said my name."

"So, what is it?"

"Chara."

"Oh, that's how you say it. Chara." Flowey emphasized, rolling his eyes. "You know, I was just trying to help people; some faithful readers, about pronouncing your name, but you... you're disgusting, Chara."

Chara turned their head. "I'm sorry, what?" they scratched their hair with their middle finger. "I couldn't hear you over your squeaky voice."

"I don't have a squeaky—arghhh..." Flowey groaned. "You just made them think I have a squeaky voice!"

"You're welcome." Chara turned back to the mission at hand.

Flowey turned to look at us. "#saveFlowey2k16."

MAD DUMMY floated over to Chara's side. "I found gold for you." he informed, dropping a bunch of gold in front of their face.

"Thanks, Dummy." Chara made their knife glint in the dark. MAD DUMMY's eyes widened and he audibly gulped. "I don't need you anymore..."

MAD DUMMY looked as if he were about to pass out.

"I'm just kidding." Chara shrugged, "You're still important."

MAD DUMMY gave a sigh of relief, clutching his heart.

The three sat at the end of the table, waiting for a certain mob boss to arrive. Her spider minions stood guard, easily trapping the trio if they wanted to leave the closed bar house. Which was essentially Grillby's place, except turned to make it look like a meeting between mob bosses. There was even a single light source hanging from the ceiling.

"If the plan works..." Chara muttered, looking around at the spider guards. "...we'll have an army."

"Fascinating." Flowey mused. "The plot thickens."

MAD DUMMY scooted closer to Flowey, whispering, "How are you not afraid of that demon?"

"Oh, it's a very complicated story. But little known fact, I'm actually their adopted brother." Flowey informed. "And I've seen a lot of things in my life that would make Chara look like a small puppy in comparison."

"Did you just call me a dog?" Chara turned menacingly, red eyes glowing grimly.

"So what if I did, huh?" Flowey taunted. "You'd probably like being called a dog. Might be one of your kinks."

"I—what..." Chara narrowed their eyes, looking away. "Don't kinkshame me..." they mumbled on the verge of tears.

"See?" Flowey turned to MAD DUMMY. "He—or she, I don't know anymore—is a loser."

"But they're a demon." MAD DUMMY said.

"Oh, so your pronoun is "they"?" Flowey sneered at Chara, "I thought it would be "xe"... Look it up, it's a gender-neutral pronoun. Don't flame me. #saveFlowey2k16."

MAD DUMMY and Chara were confused by that.

"What the hell are you on about?" Chara demanded.

"I'm like... on some good drugs." Flowey retorted unwittingly. He looked away, repeating his retort in his head. "What."

Suddenly, the character they were waiting for showed up. The spider lady Muffet walked down the aisle with sunglasses and a scarf, whipping her hair out. Her spider guards stood guard beside her, while her pet followed close behind.

"Jesus." Flowey remarked, "Her pet is... is..."

"Adorable." MAD DUMMY smiled.

"Horrendous." Chara grimaced.

"That cupcake has like... not enough legs." Flowey noted, eyes widening at the realization. "It only has six legs! It's not like a spider! It's impure!"

"Guys guys guys, composure, keep it cool. Stay calm." Chara chided, slapping them away.

"What did I do?" MAD DUMMY whispered.

"#saveAsriel2k16." Flowey whispered back.

"See, that? That right there?" Chara turned back to him. "What the hell is that?"

"It's just..." Flowey chuckled, lying, "...some good drugs, maaAn."

"Your voice cracked."

"Shut up, Dummy."

Muffet cleared her throat, gaining their attention again.

"Jeez, WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH US?" Flowey shouted.

"What do I want?" Muffet gave a disapproving huff, looking them up and down. "If I remember, YOU called ME here. And I have to say, you don't look like what my spider described, you look like a talking flower."

"I CALLED YOU HERE." Chara shouted.

"What's with the shouting?" MAD DUMMY asked.

"This table's too long, and she's on the other end, so..." Flowey trailed away, shrugging his head around like you would shrug your shoulders around.

"She can't hear me from here?" MAD DUMMY asked, looking dead on at Muffet. "Your hair looks terrible."

"Your feet stink." Flowey added.

"Your eyes are like black holes. Just... that's just..." MAD DUMMY felt his stomach flipped, realizing that Muffet's eyes do look like sockets. "...oh god. What have I done to myself?"

"Shit, dude." Flowey trembled. "Why'd you have to say that?"

"I thought—I thought-"

"Shut the hell up, you guys!" Chara slammed their fist, glaring back at them. "I'm right here!"

"You're not Muffet." Flowey and MAD DUMMY said at the same time.

"No, but I noticed her soulless eyes. That freaks me the fudge out!" Chara told them. "And now I have to talk to her! Eye contact! My red eyes won't scare her if I think she's scarier!"

"Oh, sorry, Chara." MAD DUMMY turned to Flowey. "Muffet's eyes look more like beads, don't ya think?"

"SHUT THE HELL UP! THAT'S NOT HELPING!" Chara exploded, bursting out of her seat.

Muffet coughed, taking their attention. "It looks like you three have a lot to discuss." she said. In hindsight, it sounded like she was a teacher about to punish three students.

The three were silently confused. After a while, Flowey spoke up, "YOU'RE NOT OUR SCHOOL PRINCIPAL. THAT THREAT DOESN'T WORK HERE!"

Muffet narrowed her eyes.

"Why don't you sit closer? Shouting's gonna hurt your throat. You're gonna need your abilith to scream later on."

The three had chills going up their spines simultaneously.

"I-I think I miscalculated." Chara confessed. "I thought she was a mercenary for Mettaton... but what the heck is she?"

"Isn't... isn't being scary part of being a mercenary?"

"Mettaton would crap his pants being two feet away from her. How'd he get her to try to kill me all those times?" Chara replied, scratching their hair.

Muffet, again, cleared her throat.

"I suggest by your tone you think of me as a mercenary?" Muffet asked professionally.

Chara went silent, whatever color they had on their face was drained.

"She... S-She could hear us?" Flowey stammered.

"I'M SORRY! I'M A DEAD SPACE PIRATE! BUT THIS DEMON HAS TRAPPED ME!" MAD DUMMY exclaimed.

"That hide and seek nonsense." Muffet remarked, taking off her sunglasses. "That skeleton just made the whole world go into hiding. What did that accomplish? It didn't help in killing you, did it?" She shook her head, leaning back on her chair. "No no no... Chara, the so-called demon. You're still alive, and you want my help. Presumably to exterminate Sans the skeleton, his brother Papyrus, the warrior Undyne, and any more allies. Am I correct?"

Chara and MAD DUMMY jumped from the suddenly evil tone of her voice, while Flowey looked offended. "I am against bold letters in writing. I can't handle how it looks in contrast to other words, it's distracting."

"Well, too bad!" Muffet shouted, before realizing what Flowey said. "Wait... What?"

"Well, it just... the bold letters look bad in the story—" Flowey tried to explain, but stopped himself. "I should pause. #saveFlowey2k16. Peace, I'm out!"

A/N: Sorry, I don't participate April Fools' day. Anyway, have some of that up there instead. And then back to waiting.