Chapter 10

The deep sound of thunder fills my room waking me up. Looks like Thunder and Lightning are having some fun up there in the clouds because this is a large storm. The rain hits my window hard. It is actually frightening.

I stand up, grabbing my pillow, picking it up and hugging it close to my body. I walk quietly along the hallway until I reach the room marked "Beastboy".

I open it quietly, slipping in through the door. He's sound asleep. I pull the covers back, gently laying inside the bed next to him.

When I was with Daniel, he'd always cuddle with me, assuring me he'd keep me safe. That everything was going to be okay. I guess I miss that a little.

I hear a sigh and then I see him smile at me. "You decided to join me?" he whispers.

"The thunder's loud. I don't like it." I say. I know this is weird coming from me, but I've changed some in the past year.

I feel him wrapping his arm around my body and the warmth of his against mine. Let me remind you, I'm only wearing a tube top and some baggy pajama pants. I feel like I'm soaring.

"I'm sorry." He says, pulling back, starting to get out of bed.

"What?" I don't know what's wrong…

"I'm only in my boxers, that's how I sleep." I grab his wrist tightly,

"Don't leave me."

"I was just going to throw on a shirt."

"It's fine." I say, pulling him back into bed. He doesn't resist. He comes back under the covers, pulling me into another embrace. "It's comforting being with someone during one of these storms." I whisper, wrapping my arms around his neck. The next thing I know, we are kissing and his tongue is sliding into my mouth.

His hands run through my hair and mine run down his back. His muscles are so tight. I massage them gently and kiss him harder. His hips are rubbing against mine now, and I feel something hard. I let my cold foot slide along the back of his leg, sending chills down his spine.

We continue to kiss until another boom of thunder fills the room, causing me to jump.

"It's okay, Raven." He says, smiling.

"I know…" I say…I really do know it's okay. I just want him to tell me that.

"Come here." He says, laughing, and pulls me in close to him again, this time, my back against his chest. Our bodies fit perfectly as we cuddle. The next time the thunder roars, I don't jump as much, and he holds me tightly. Beastboy kisses my neck gently and I feel myself getting wet. I don't act on it though; instead I try and fall asleep in his arms. Although I really want him…Am I a horrible person for that?

"I love you." He says, letting his hands roam along my sides.

He kisses my neck, sucking it gently. Sucking in one spot, but it feels really good. One hand slides down my stomach, writing tiny messages on my tummy. I smile, putting my hands over my head, and feeling his hair gently. I turn my head and kiss his ear, because he's still kissing my neck.

I'm probably going to have a red spot on my neck after tonight…whatever…

I push my body closer to his and the warmth of his body comforts me. I love him so much…at least I think I do.

He smiles and pulls me closer to him, still kissing my neck. I take his free hand and let his fingers touch the hem of my underwear. He stops kissing and looks at me wondering if I was really giving him an okay. I smiled and lay my head back down on his pillow and he returns to kissing my neck furiously. He moves his lips and tongue up towards my ear and whispers in it, "I love you." He blows slowly and kisses my ear. It feels kind of weird but still kind of good.

His hand …LEMON…just an FYI…sneaks under my underwear and he plays with my hair, twisting and turning it through his fingers. One of his fingers touches where I've been getting extremely wet. I can't help it…oh, it feels so good though.

I can feel him smile when he feels me and his fingers begin to massage around my pussy. He starts to play with my lips, gently teasing me. It's not very nice…he should stop teasing! My body is growing uptight with anticipation and I want him so badly.

His tongue traces little circles on my neck and he moves down to my shoulder. His other hand reaches up, gently playing with my breasts.

I can feel the sparks flying through my body and into him. One finger travels inside me and pulses in and out. I sigh when he does this because it feels so good. He brings his finger out and adds another, so how his index and middle finger are pulsing in and out of me slowly and starting to pulse faster. It feels good and I can feel something hard in my back. I start to moan heavier and I can feel the pleasure going through my body. It is so wonderful and almost too much to handle. He then whispers in my ear, "I wanna fuck you so bad."

I reach behind me and pull his pants down slowly. He takes his fingers out from inside me and he pulls down my underwear and pants. He looks at me again, wondering if this is what I really want. I nod and he takes his strong arms, and twists me around. He reaches behind my back, pulling up my shirt and undoing by bra. He just stares at my breasts for a little then he begins to massage them gently. He continues to until I can't take it anymore. I reach in and kiss him. My tongue roams inside his mouth tasting every little bit of sweetness in there. His lips separate from mine as his mouth moves downwards. His moist lips gently kiss me all the way down to my breasts where he gently sucks on one, using his other hand to massage the other. His tongue gently flicks my nipple as I lay there, on my back.

He finally moves his way back upwards and gives me one more warning glance and I smile one more time at him pushing my hips into his. He slowly enters me and it is just wonderful. His hard cock pulses in and out of my pussy as our hips move at an almost perfect rhythm. We continue to kiss and I can feel myself coming to a climax. I feel him jolt inside me and I know he's also coming to a climax.

I moan gently, "Beastboy…" and he moans my name so gently, "Raven…" and we stay like that moaning in unison.

I throw my head back and he kisses me harder as we come to our climax. He finally pulls himself out and smiles at me. "I love you Raven." He says, and I smile and hug him, falling asleep in his strong arms.

When I wake up, Beastboy is gone. Why did I just do that? The sun is shining outside and I feel like I am going to throw up. Beastboy reminds me of Daniel! Daniel left the night I gave myself to him…now Beastboy is gone! How could he do this to me! Was I not good enough for him?

I feel a wave of guilt wash over me when Beastboy comes in, carrying a tray holding waffles, herbal tea and some soy milk for himself. He didn't leave me, he just was getting me breakfast. As he steps through the door, the tray starts to fall over, and I chant my famous words softly. The tray is immediantly enclosed in my black force and I carry it over to the bed where Beastboy follows, smiling.

"How you feeling this morning?" he asks me.

"Pretty good. I think I'm ready to talk to the team now…" better now than never, I suppose.

"Really?" Beastboy's ears perk up as he says this.

"Yes" I stand up, and when the sheets fall off of me, I realize that I am completely naked from the night before. I quickly throw on my shirt from yesterday and my underwear.

"If you don't mind, I'll be right back." I say and sprint out the door and float quickly to my room without anyone noticing. Well, except Starfire who is slowly emerging from Robin's room. It looks like she pulled the same trick I did. We exchange eye contact and little smiles and I fly through my door. I put on a white tank top shirt, pull my hair into a high loose ponytail, so that some of my bangs are hanging out and it's actually really messy, but I don't care; (my hair has grown quite a bit since last year). I put on some shorter shorts to prove that I'm NOT cutting on my legs.

I pull on an extra large black sweatshirt that pretty much drops off my shoulders and has no hood. I put on some black soft slippers and then exit my room, walking slowly once again to Beastboy's room. Beastboy is gone and I'm sure he's gathering everyone at the main room, so I don't have to explain myself twenty times over. I really don't want to do this, but I guess they deserve an explanation, especially Starfire. She really was worried and confused last night, I remember.

I grab my herbal tea that is sitting on the desk along with a note.

Raven,

I'm so proud of you, and I wanted you to know that. Everyone is going to be in the operation's room when you get there, so please don't be overwhelmed. I love you.

Beastboy

Ah, that was really sweet. He told me he loves me! Oh, and that thing with me being not too overwhelmed…good thing he warned me…haha…no, I really do care about that too. But I love it when he tells me he loves me.

I clutch onto my tea mug, letting the warmth sink into my veins and I enter the room, taking a deep breath. I purposely wore a sweatshirt because I don't want anyone staring at my cut up and nasty arms. It is really disgusting, and repulsive. But it's something I just NEED to do!

I walk into the center of the sofa and just sit down, staring at my mug, not bothering to look at ANYONE. I don't even know who I'm sitting next to. I feel a one armed hug come from my left side and I look at the person. It's Robin. Is he really comforting me right now? I give him a look that says, thank you but back off now then return to staring at my mug.

I don't know what to say now, so I just tell them that…it's a good start right?

"I don't know what to say."