10. The promise

Fortunately, today there's nothing left of the taser gun except for its highly useful function. I can still deal electric shocks to others while I myself remain protected from the effects, just like now if I tried to create a lightning in the shower.

The showers at the BSAA hospital are small and boring, nothing special. There's not much to choose from in the way of shower gel, but there's a white one on my tray called "Snowflake" which smells better than anything my nose has ever smelled before. I apply it to my body while the lukewarm water continues to rain down on me, and think about Chris as I always do when I'm on my own.

At first my thoughts are harmless, but they get dirty when my hand touches that specific part of my body to apply soap to it too. I think about how long it's been. The quickie in the shower before leaving for Edonia was the last time Chris and I had sex. Now I'm in the shower again, and while he's not physically present, my memories are all the more vivid. I close my eyes and let them in as I start playing with myself.

The good thing is I don't even need to strain my imagination. Chris and I have gone through pretty much all existing positions in reality, so when I need erotic thoughts to reach the climax, all I have to do is remember. Not having enjoyed this kind of amusement for more than half a year, I thought I'd gone rusty at first, but it turns out I'm just all the more loaded. It doesn't take long.

I laugh out loud when a big load of the white stuff squirts the glass wall of my shower stall where it is washed away by the water immediately. After that, however, the happiness fades and I'm serious again. Chris...

Where is he now, at this precise moment? What is he doing? What is he thinking about? I hope Jill and the others will find him soon. I couldn't bear if he sank into depression again because of me while I'm right here, waiting for him. Or did he forget me? Is my brother right after all? Perhaps he's glad to be rid of me. Perhaps the sacrifice I've made for him was not as great as everybody thinks... considering that I was sure I had no other choice...

I lean against the wall, slowly sliding down on it until my butt reaches the ground. I've already been in the shower longer than ever before now since the hospital has become my temporary home. Although it tortures me, I can't help considering the possibility that Chris doesn't care about me over and over again. That feeling from another time returns – the feeling that there's no longer a heart in my chest. Even though it was my arm I amputated at Neo-Umbrella's underwater base, that part of my body has returned... but something else, something much more important, is missing in its place.

I don't look at the clock, therefore I don't know for how long I stay sitting there, feeling sorry for myself. Eventually I turn off the water, get out of the shower and return to my room, wrapped in a towel, keeping my head down. When I sit down on my bed, sighing, considering never getting up again, I hear a hollow throbbing as if someone was striking against glass. Even though I don't care what it is, I turn my head to face the glass wall through which I can see the corridor... and jump up, not sure whether I actually see or just wish to see it.

There he stands with an unbelieving look on his face: Chris. He presses himself against the wall, giving me a sense of déjà vu. I was presented with the same sight the last time we saw each other. I will never forget that. Me with my arm that has mutated into a taser gun on one, a desperate Chris on the other side of the window he strikes against with his fist. And then... the ugly skull of the creature we thought we had defeated once and for all...

I was aware that I would give Chris some electric burns, and as much as I hated the thought of hurting him, there was no other way to free him. So I aimed at the face of the monster with my arm as I had done before with my firearm, concentrated and shot lightning at it. It created a connection of blue light like laser beams between us, the jellyfish shrieked and convulsed, Chris did the same, and then it finally let go of him. I cut off the connection before he landed in the water.

Chris, not realizing what had just saved him, turned around to look for me. His eyes widened in horror when he saw what I had become.

"Out of the water!" I shouted to him. There was no time for explanations. It was the first time I gave my captain an order and not the other way around, but he followed it at once. He quickly climbed on a high stable crate the water had not reached yet, and I turned on the monster again.

The jellyfish seemed to have recovered well from the first weak electric shock, but I had only tested my new powers at first while also looking out for Chris. Now I used them again, this time with all the force I could produce. I felt the electricity in the water which had risen to the height of my bottom by now, but it didn't hurt me. I only felt a tickle while the jellyfish was nearly barbecued.

I looked at Chris for a second to make sure he wasn't touching the water before finishing the creature off. It shrieked one last time, then it fell over and stayed lying down in the water.

I did the same. The power left my body, I collapsed and apparently lost conscience for a short while. When I came around, Chris was holding me in his arms, looking like he was about to start crying. "Piers, what have you done?"

"It was the only way... to save you!" Speaking was difficult as if the virus in my blood was trying to prevent me from doing so. I didn't feel well. My mutated arm ached, and the pain was starting to slowly spread all over my body. He helped me get up.

"Go." I pointed at a door leading out of the room while the water level around us kept rising. "Leave me here. I would only... slow you down... in this state." I looked at my arm, contorting my face in disgust.

"Have you lost your mind?" Chris took my face in both hands. "We'll get out of here together!"

I shook my head, convinced that it was too late, but he wouldn't give up. He was pleading now. "Everything's going to be alright, do you hear me? Jake's blood has the antibodies. Our scientists will figure out a way to help you. I'm not going without you, understood?"

I looked into his blue eyes, recognizing true concern in them. I knew he wouldn't be convinced to leave me, so I nodded and agreed to go with him, deciding to keep myself under control for as long as possible. For as long as it would take for him to get to safety, I would not allow the virus to seize hold of me. I would not go down without a fight.

There wasn't much time left until the self-destruction, but it didn't take us long to find the escape pods. Chris had to support me because I wasn't strong enough to walk the last part without help, feeling ashamed.

"Soon we'll be out of here!" he promised when he sat me down on the floor next to the entrance to one of the pods and pressed a few buttons on a panel on the wall to open the door and prepare the launch of the pod. They were round and big enough for three people.

The pain in my arm grew stronger. I knew I didn't have long anymore. Once I was in that capsule with Chris, there was nothing I could do to protect him from myself. I would mutate further, lose my common sense and attack him. I'd either kill him or have him kill me. He wouldn't have the heart to do the latter, I knew that. So I would kill him.

No, I told myself. I would not.

"Okay, I think I know how it works." Chris came back, bowed down to me to help me get on my feet. He smiled confidently. "You'll see, just a few seconds and we'll be out of here."

I walked with him until we were right in front of the entrance to the pod, and stopped. He tried to pull me in, but I fought back. My thoughts were only revolving around not killing him.

"Piers, what's wrong?" he asked anxiously. "We're out of time, everything is about to break down around us!"

"I... promised you... something," I muttered. "I promised you that you could always... count on me... remember?"

Chris gave me a serious look, shaking his head. He didn't understand.

"And now... I will keep... the promise. I won't... let anything... happen to you!"

He opened his mouth, but before he could protest, I pushed him away with all of my remaining force. He fell into the pod and the door slammed shut before he could get back on his feet.

"Piers, no! Don't do this!" He had to scream so I could hear him. He struck against the door which would not open anymore, looking at me through the round window.

I turned away and shook my head. It was too late for me.

"Damn it, listen to me! Open this door, that's an order!" he screamed. "I'm not going without you!"

The base started collapsing and he only had to press a button in the pod to make sure he was shot into the sea. But I was afraid he would rather die down here than persuade himself to do so. So I took a brief look around, spotted a small lever next to the panel and assumed that pulling it would induce the launch from here. Chris's continuous pleading to open the door followed me as I went there.

"No!" he yelled after I had pulled the lever. Lights flashed as the pod was prepared for launch. I returned to the window to see his face once more before I died.

It was so beautiful... Even though it was now distorted by concern and sadness – and by resignation when he realized that there was nothing left he could do for me. I'd already noticed before that no negative emotion was able to warp his face in a way that I no longer liked it.

Despite my situation, I was happy for the first time since I had found him at the bar. I was happy that his face would be the last thing I saw before transforming into a monster. Everything was collapsing around me, water was pouring in from all sides, but nothing could disturb my happiness. If my stiffened facial features had allowed, I'm sure I would have smiled.

"I love you!" Chris shouted at me.

Or at least I thought I was hearing something like that. I couldn't be sure anymore because my senses were starting to go crazy. But I just imagined he had said it, and he knew I loved him too. That was the reason I did what I did. What had to be done. Why I sacrificed my life to save his.

I saw a single tear running down his cheek while we were looking into each other's eyes, and we didn't lose that eye contact for one second when the pod started moving very quickly and darted off. I heard him scream my name one last time, then he was so far gone I couldn't see him anymore. Yet I could still see the pod – and the shapeless shadow approaching it.

The jellyfish monster! It was still alive and had found a way out of the base. And now it was moving towards the escape pod, meaning to hurt Chris. It seemed like I hadn't earned my retirement yet.

My arm started crackling electrically as if it knew what I was up to. I aimed it at the pod the monster was attacking – a part of the lower half of its body had already grown back – and tried to focus with the last of my strength.

"You... won't... hurt... him!" I muttered, although no one could hear me, and then I stopped talking since it was unnecessarily exhausting.

My mutated arm heated up due to the force of the lightning I was preparing, and then, when I thought it couldn't get any stronger, I unleashed it on the monster. Bingo! The electric shock hit the jellyfish in the back and ripped it to pieces, its blood colored the water red, and Chris's pod continued to float upwards. The light inside had gone out, but I had a feeling that Chris was alright... and that he would get over it.

He was safe. It was the only thing that counted for me and I could be happy again. I don't know if I was actually smiling, but what spread on my face at least felt like a smile when I fell down on my knees and leaned against the wall, all hell breaking loose around me.

Peacefully awaiting death, I closed my eyes and immediately saw Chris's face in front of me. I saw the escape pod break through the water surface and open. He stepped out in the air, clinging to the door frame with one hand, the other protecting his blinking eyes from the light of the rising sun.

In the distance he could hear the sound of a propeller cutting through the air. As soon as his eyes had gotten used to the daylight after the darkness of the underwater base, he looked up and spotted a chopper on the horizon flying towards him. In it were Leon and Helena who had managed to defeat Derek Simmons and were now on their way to finish what the president had started before falling victim to the bioterrorism attack in Tall Oaks: Someone had to tell the world about the dangers of bioterrorism. But people would also learn about the heroes they could count on. Heroes who would be there to protect them when it mattered again. Heroes of the BSAA, heroes like Chris.

It was a beautiful last thought.