A/N: Okay, here is a new chapter, once more thank you Sammie for reviewing.
Disclaimer: I own none of the character except for mine. I also don't own Gomenasai by TATU
"Gomenasai"
"Oh my god, I can't believe I did that to her," Remus moaned. It was three days after the attack. The Marauders, Rosetta who was sitting on a chair beside Jocelyn's bed holding her hand in both hers, Sammie Andrea and her sister were all in the Hospital Wing. Jaiden and Amanda were still not there just yet, Mel was sent to get them.
"Moony, you can't blame yourself, you didn't know what you were doing," James replied.
"I could have killed her though. If she dies or contracts lycanthropy I'll kill myself."
No one said anything for a little, Rosetta was still looking at Jocelyn's face in concentration as if she would not see it again in many years. Sammie was getting a little worried that Rosetta was barely moving side from the breathing.
"Is Rose going to be okay? She hasn't really moved since we got here," Sammie said looking at Rose.
"She's just in shock some what from what happened, she'll probably get over it as soon as Jocelyn wakes up."
"What if she doesn't wake up? What happens if she stays like this?" Remus asked his voice getting high and nervous. His pacing increased as well.
"Moony snap out of it man, your making me edgy, and I don't get like that, you know that man," Sirius responded.
'Moony, where have I heard that name before? Wait, that was the werewolf's name. I remember hearing that from the dog.'
"We came as fast as we could," Jaiden called running into the Hospital Wing with Amanda and Mel right behind him.
"You have no idea how hard it was to find them," Mel said dropping into one of the empty chairs.
"Has there been any change?"
"Not really, she's still very weak."
"I wish I was there with her, we could have protected her from all of this," Sammie said.
"I hope you are not enquiring that I was not trying to protect her, that I was not even there!" snapped Rosetta angerily, tears running down her cheeks. Her eyes were glaring daggers up at Sammie who backed away from her. No one has ever seen Rosetta get angry at anyone.
"No, that's not it at all. I swear. I'm sorry for saying that...truly I am. I guess I'm a little concerned that's all I'm not saying you weren't trying to protect her. You love her, she means everything to you."
"Please keep you voices down. Joss needs her rest," Rosetta said looking away from Sammie who had tears in her eyes.
'Thank you for whomever said that!'
"Joss, can you hear us hun?"
Jocelyn gave a soft moan.
"Are you okay hunny?"
Jocelyn slowlyn began to open her eyes to find herself surrounded by her friends and cousins. She could feel Rose holding on to her hand in both her warm ones.
"You gave us a right scare."
"Where am I?" Joss asked as she tried to sit up, as if she was merely waking up from a nice sleep.
"The Hospital Wing. You almost died on us for a minute, but Madame Pomfrey was able to bring you back and keep you stable," replied Sammie.
Jocelyn once again tried to sit up, but Rosetta firmly pushed her back down.
"Your too weak to move," she responded.
Madame Pomfrey soon came over to the bed to see if Jocelyn was awake.
"Goodness gracious my dear, you must rest," she said as she watched Jocelyn force herself into a sitting position.
"I feel better, honestly I do."
"Let me just change the bandages," she said. jocelyn laid back down while Madame Pomfrey carefully removed the old bandages from around her shoulder and saw that it was completely healed. Next she removed the bandages around her stomach, saw that there was now scars. Finally she removed the last ones around her ankle and neck and saw that all of them were healed.
"How can that be?" everyone asked in disbelief.
"Well...there's something that you need to know...this is totally come as a shock I'm quite aware...I'm a hybrid, which means that I'm half lycan and half vampire. I didn't want to tell anyone, I wasn't quite ready to tell my secret, but since everyone was here when they saw my healed wounds I guess I have to tell you."
"Wow, I never would have guessed with you. Wait, how are you able to heal yourself?"
"Mix of both kind of gives me the ability to heal most wounds," explained Jocelyn who finally sat fully up. She finally looked down to see a IV in her arm and blood passing through into her arm.
"How much blood did I lose?"
"Quite a lot, be thankful Miss Bianchi has the same blood type as you," answered Madame Pomfrey.
Jocelyn looked over at Rosetta who was slightly blushing, "Oh hunny, thank you."
"No problem, I told you, you mean everything to me."
Everyone was still looking at her a little shocked unable to believe what they were seeing.
"I still can't believe that you are able to fully sit up and move around, I thought you would be too weak to move, sit up or do anything."
"Never, I tend to do a lot of bouncing back quickly. My cousins know a lot about that."
"Here, I'll unhook you from the IV, seeing that you don't need it."
"No, it's quite all right, keep it in."
"Yes, well I still want you to rest, I want you to stay just another night to observe you."
"All right, I'll stay," Jocelyn agreed not wanting to argue.
"We'll leave, we just wanted to drop by to see how you were doing. We'll come back after dinner. Sound good?" asked Lily.
"Sounds like a plan."
"Great!"
"Take care," Mel said.
"Joss, mind if I stay with you?" Remus asked as everyone headed out, all except for Rostta who was still sitting on the chair.
"Not at all, you have to majorally promise me that you won't make a big deal of it," Jocelyn answered smiling lightly.
"Well, um...the good thing is the lycanthrophy didn't do any damage to you."
"Oh thank god. If I ever meet that werewolf again, I swear its going to be bad. He was the rudest one I've ever met, even the one who bit me was nicer."
"Well...wait, you've met other werewolf's?"
"Side from the one who turned me and my other friends at my old school."
"Oh, well, um...there's some bad news I have to tell you."
"What is it?"
"Professor Dumbledore thought I should tell you. This is my punishment really, thank god I'm not being expelled."
"Punishment for what...it can't be...it was you?" Jocelyn whispered the last part in shock.
"I'm...the...werewolf...who attacked you," Remus stuttered nervously.
Jocelyn merely started at Remus not believing what she heard.
"What's the matter?"
"I still can't believe that it was you who attacked me."
"Why is that a shock to you?"
"Because I don't fully believe that out of all the people who would be rude to someone it would be you. So your the reason why I am here."
"Joss, I swear, I never meant to hurt you in anyway. The wolf is a very powerful thing to over, you should know that. He takes over my mind a lot, he gets total and complete control. I really didn't know it was you, not that I could help it if I did, but ever since James and Sirius told me waht I did I was so scared that I had killed you. I would never try to hurt you."
Jocelyn placed a finger on Remus's lip to silence him, "Remus, I understand that, you know that yourself. I'm sorry too. I know you never meant to hurt me."
"Really?"
She nodded her head, "Really. By any chance could you do me a favour please."
"Anything," he said.
"Can you get me some lined paper please."
"Absolutely." Remus went searchign through the dresser by her bed. Rosetta moved so she sat on the other side of Jocelyn and sat down. Remus found four sheets of paper and handed them to her. "There you go."
"Thank you. Is there a quill in there by any chance?"
"You can use mine," Rosetta replied taking a quill out of her bag.
Jocelyn began to jot something down on the paper.
"What are you writing?" both asked.
"Just a song. About all that has happened."
Remus gulped.
Jocelyn smiled, "don't worry, I assure you it's nothing bad."
Remus sighed with relief as he continued to watch her write more words down on the papers, but then stopped. "What's wrong?"
"I don't know what else I should write," Jocelyn admitted, pushing her hair back from her face."
"Well read us what you have so far."
What I thought wasn't mine
In the light
Was a one of a kind,
A precious pearl
When I wanted to cry
I couldn't cause I
Wasn't allowed
Gomenasai for everything
Gomenasai, I know I let you down
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now
What I thought wasn't all
So innocent
Was a delicate doll
Of porcelain
When I wanted to call you
And ask you for help
I stopped myself
Gomenasai for everything
Gomenasai, I know I let you down
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now
"Maybe I should just start over, I've always only know the course off by heart," Jocelyn said ready to crumple the paper.
"No wait. How about 'what I thought was a dream A mirage was as real as it seemed a privilage...' and repeat the gomenasai part."
Jocelyn thought in her head for a moment about it, "that's perfect. You could be a professional song writer."
Remus merely blushed.
Jocelyn quickly wrote the rest of the song down once it was all in her head. "I think I have a great tune for it.
What I thought wasn't mine
In the light
Was a one of a kind,
A precious pearl
When I wanted to cry
I couldn't cause I
Wasn't allowed
Gomenasai for everything
Gomenasai, I know I let you down
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now
What I thought wasn't all
So innocent
Was a delicate doll
Of porcelain
When I wanted to call you
And ask you for help
I stopped myself
Gomenasai for everything
Gomenasai, I know I let you down
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now
What I thought was a dream
A mirage
Was as real as it seemed
A privilege
When I wanted to tell you
I made a mistake
I walked away
Gomenasai, for everything
Gomenasai, Gomenasai, Gomenasai
I never needed a friend,
Like I do now
Gomenasai, I let you down
Gomenasai, Gomenasai,
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now."
"That is so beautiful Joss."
"Here let me put one more thing on it," Jocelyn said as she wrote something at the end of the paper. "Dedicated to Rosetta and Remus, written but Jocelyn, Rosetta and Remus. October 26th 1986."
"Josie, that is so cute, thank you," Rosetta said smiling at Jocelyn.
"You are most welcome."
"What does that mean, gomenasai?"
"I'm sorry, I learned it from a friend of mine who use to live in Japan," Jocelyn explained.
"That is so sweet, but why did you use it for your feelings?"
"Because we all have something to be sorry for. Remus for attacking me, me well there's a few mainly for losing my parents and problems that keep rising in life."
"Wow, I never knew that," Rosetta said, resting her head on Jocelyn's shoulder.
"Remus I have a question for you, I've had this happen with a few friends, its to keep the wolf's mind at bay."
"What do you mean by that?" he asked in confusion.
"Let me try something, I used this once on my friends and it seemed to work," Jocelyn said now sitting cross legged. She ushered Remus to sit on the bed as well.
"All right, let's see how I did this. Close your eyes," Jocelyn commanded. Remus gave her a look, but she gave him a stern look, so he obeyed.
"Now, I want you to remember when you were bitten. How old you were, where you were, how you felt."
Remus shuddered. He was six years old when he received his bite, in the forest behind his house. It was frightening. Remus hadn't realized he said that out loud.
"Remus, can you remember when you were younger than that?" Jocelyn asked her eyes also clsoed almost in concentration herself.
He mumbled something.
"Remus, can you remember when you were younger than that?" Jocelyn repeated.
"Barely."
"I want you to try. Try to remember what your mind was like before you were bitten."
His mind before he was bitten. Oh, those were the days, his mind was free. Free to think about and wander wherever he wanted. He never have argument with his mind before his wolf had taken over, never had to follow orders from something else that involved his mind.
"Remus, can you remember anything?" she asked, her breath slightly shallow.
"Yes," he whispered.
"What can you remember?"
"How free my mind was to think about whatever I wanted. I never had to follow orders from something else that lived in my head beside me. I was free."
"I want you to concentrate on that thought, very hard and nothing else will come into your mind besides that thought. Remember how good it felt to have your own mind."
As he shut his eyes tighter to concentrate, he could hear the wolf inside his head, trying to make its voice heard.
"I will not let you let her shut me out, I'm a part of you! I AM YOU! You are nothing without me!"
"I...I..." Remus stuttered.
"You are mine to control! Not the other way around!"
"You aren't mine! Your not going to control me!" Remus yelled in his head.
"You can't get rid of me just like that..."
But the wolf's voice was getting farther and farther away in sound. After a minute, he could barely hear its voice. When Remus opened his eyes, Jocelyn stared back at him with a smile on her lips.
"Are you okay?" she asked breathlessly.
"He...it...it stopped. I can't hear it any more," Remus said, shocked.
Jocelyn merely smiled.
"You did it!" Remus replied, hugging her.
"It was no problem, you have to keep happy though."
"Pardon?" Remus asked, coming down from his happiness.
"You're only able to shut it down right now, because you believe that you can. You have to keep thinking like that, in order for it to stay like that!"
"But...I don't...I don't know if I can."
Jocelyn placed her finger against her lips, "I know you can."
"How do you know that, and were able to do that?" asked Remus and Rosetta.
"I had to go through the same ordeal when I was turned into a hybrid," Jocelyn explained. "But for now I think I am going to get some rest, but come see me after with the others, okay?"
"Yeah, definately. Sleep well."
Jocelyn wrapped her arm him. "Have fun at dinner."
Rosetta didn't move, she wanted to stay with Jocelyn no matter what. Remus smiled slightly as he walked out of the Hospital Wing.