Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural
Bleeding Storm
Dean downed his third whisky in a row. He had promised Sam he wouldn't drink anymore, after the first time he had nearly killed him, back in Dillimore. Even then, it hadn't been so bad. Dean had stopped short of strangling the life out of his little brother, and his brother had gone on breathing. When he had been controlled by the siren, he had stopped short of strangling him to death once again, and due to Sam's own actions, he hadn't shattered his little brother's neck. And when he had been a soulless zombie, even then he had stopped short of killing his little brother.
This time it was all different. This time, he had been the one who had stuck the scythe into his brother's back, ripped it down through his spine, slicing his little brother open. This time, he couldn't just hold his brother and soothe him, tell him lies like it was going to be alright, that they would fix him, that he would get him back, that he would get revenge on the one who had taken him from him. This time, Dean was the one who had murdered Sam. Not Jake. Not a wish gone wrong. Not Zachariah. Not Anna. Not Walt and Roy. No this time it was Dean. Dean. His big brother had been the one who had killed Sam. Dean, his stalwart protector, his eternal defender, the one who would do anything for him, he was the one who had killed him this time round.
And Dean just couldn't cope. Dad, Bobby, Ellen, Jo, Mom, even Cas, all of them had always said 'protect Sammy'. And he had tried so hard, and most of the time, he had succeeded. Even when he hadn't, he had always gotten Sam back. This time was so much different. This time he was the one who had killed Sam. He had failed in his job, his mission, to protect Sam, and he had been the one who had actually killed his little brother. He couldn't reconcile it within his mind. His mind was split into two sections. One was the part that protected Sam. The second was the part that killed anything that hurt him. And now, both of them were banging against each other as he tried to wrap his head around the fact that he had been the one who had snuffed out his brother's life force, that he had been the one who had made Sam draw his last breath, which could have been his last one ever had he not somehow been resurrected. He could have been the one who took his brother away from him forever. He could have been the one who destroyed the best thing in his life.
It was all on him. He had killed Sam. He had killed his little brother, and there was no way he was ever going to forget that.
Dean took another sip of his whisky, not caring anymore. He had promised Sam he wouldn't drink anymore. He had also promised Sam he would protect him, that he wouldn't let anything hurt him. And he had failed. And considering he was failing so drastically he may as well fail properly, at everything he set up for himself.
He only had to kill Lilith. Then Gordon. Kill them and Sam would be safe. Nothing would hurt him again, he would make sure of it. He wanted Sam safe, and that meant making sure Lilith was dead, as dead as it was possible to be if not deader. Sam had to be safe.
"Dean?" Sam asked softly, sitting down beside him at the bar.
Dean closed his eyes in irritation. He didn't want to talk to his brother, he wanted to protect him. His brother was better off without him, that way he couldn't hurt him.
"What are you doing here Sam?" he asked, and his brother looked at him intently.
"Dean, you're being ridiculous. I'm here, I'm right beside you, alive." Sam said, but Dean shook his head.
"Sam, this was different. I can barely cope when someone else kills you. Remember last time? I flipped. Completely. And this time, it's so much more different. I'm the one who killed you. How am I meant to cope with that?" Dean asked irritably.
"By talking to me! Dean, I know what you're going through, and I'm trying to stop you from making the same stupid mistakes that I did, please listen to me!" Sam implored his brother, who stubbornly took another drink from his whisky.
"It isn't the same thing Sam. I killed you. All my life, it's been my job to protect you. And all of a sudden I kill you. Can't balls up much bigger than that." Dean said miserably, ignoring Sam as he shook his head.
"But Dean, you did nothing wrong!" Sam wheedled, and Dean abruptly stood, glaring down at his brother.
"Did nothing wrong? I fucking killed you Sam! I stuck the scythe into your back and ripped you open like a piñata! So don't you sit there and tell me I did nothing wrong!" Dean yelled, attracting some very curious looks from the other denizens of the bar as he stormed to the door away from his brother.
"He's...um, he's very melodramatic. His tv show gets cancelled and it's the end of the world sort of guy." Sam assured them hastily, which they seemed to buy, allowing Sam to rush out after his brother.
Dean was blazing up the street, away from the bar, and Sam could virtually feel his anger, fear and distress from several paces behind him. Problem was that despite Dean being the one with the lead, Sam had longer legs and quickly caught up with him.
"Dean, stop it!" Sam said, grabbing his brother by the shoulders and spinning him to face him.
Dean's face was a mask of different emotions, grief, anger, despair, guilt, disappointment, and just looking lost. He looked at his brother, his eyes narrowing, and Sam couldn't tell why, whether it was through anger at him, disappointment with him, guilt, contempt, he just couldn't tell.
"Let go of me Sam." Dean said, his voice flat and emotionless as Sam pinned his arms to his sides.
"No. Dean please, you have to listen to me. This wasn't your fault. It was an accident. I died yeah, but I came back to you, just like I always do. I'm still here, so why are you suddenly acting like a one man army?" he asked, and Dean glowered.
"Because there is a murderous bitch out there who made me do what I did, someone who is gunning right for you. And she isn't going to let up. As soon as she finds out you're alive, she's going to be after you, wanting to kill you. Again. And I don't intend to let her. I'm going to hunt her down and kill her like the monster she is." Dean growled, and Sam shook his head, feeling tears coming into his eyes.
"Dean, please. You're doing what I did. After Lilith killed you, I wanted her dead. I wanted to hunt her down and make her hurt, make her pay for killing you, for doing what she did, for taking you away from me. And even when you came back, I was still so obsessed with getting revenge that I changed into something I never wanted to be, an evil, revenge driven monster, a sort of demonic version of dad. I didn't listen to you, and we drifted apart, I nearly lost you. And we've worked so hard to be brothers again, I don't want to lose that too. I agree with you, Lilith has to die. For a start it's the only way we're going to screw over Raphael. I'm with you all the way Dean, I will do whatever it takes to help you kill her. But this time we do it together. Please don't do this alone. Talk to me, I can help. Please Dean. This isn't you, you aren't being you. I'm ok, you didn't kill me. Please..." Sam begged, tear filled puppy dog eyes in full force.
Dean however, for the first time ever, proved immune to them, and he shoved Sam off of him, making Sam stagger back sadly.
"I'm going to kill her Sam. I'm going to hunt her down and rip off her head. I'm not going to let her hurt you again. So, either you shut up, fall into line and help me out, or you shut up and stay behind where you'll be safe, because either way, come the morning, we're going after Lilith. And seeing as you won't help with your powers, we're doing it my way. Clear?" Dean asked, his voice tight and sour, and Sam nodded softly.
"Clear." He said miserably, and Dean nodded and turned to leave.
"Dean...I know you want to kill Lilith because of what she made you do, but it was an accident. I don't blame you, it wasn't your fault." Sam said desperately, trying to get his brother back.
Dean froze a little, then kept moving, Sam hurrying to keep up with him.
"Stop blaming yourself, don't feel guilty, it wasn't you." Sam said, trying to hold his brother back.
Dean then abruptly turned and punched him in the mouth, knocking Sam off his feet, leaving him to look up at his brother, hurt, angry, and slightly frightened as he saw the look on Dean's face. Dean had been drinking, but not enough to make him do anything stupid. But still, Sam froze as he saw the look on his brother's face.
The same look he had had that night in Dillimore when he had almost killed him.
Maybe his brother did resent him, did blame him, he thought sadly.
"You think that makes it better? You don't get it! What I did to you, how I did it, you don't understand!" Dean raged at his fallen brother.
"Then help me understand, I just want to help!" Sam yelled back, but Dean shook his head.
"No Sam. I'm doing this for your own good. Lilith has to die, it's the only way you'll be safe, the only way everyone will be safe. This is the only way to make it right. So shut up and deal with it already, because we're doing this my way." Dean said angrily, and stomped away without even offering to help his brother up.
Sam looked at Dean's retreating back sadly, feeling the tears spilling down his cheeks. Dean was so consumed with anger, guilt and revenge that he wasn't Dean anymore. All he cared about now was killing Lilith, and he didn't care who he hurt in pursuit of that goal. Even if it was his own brother. He had surrounded himself in a fiery armour and was determined to repel everyone who tried to come near him.
Even Sam.
Sam looked at where his brother had disappeared miserably. This was all his fault. He had gotten himself killed...and as a result he had lost his big brother
XX
Sam couldn't find Dean when he got back, he supposed he was lurking somewhere around the warehouse, but he wasn't in the coach or the caravan. With everyone still shaken, he went to the caravan to try and figure out some way to fix his brother, but sitting in the dark caravan only irritated him as he held some ice to his damaged mouth, trying to reduce the swelling from his brother's punch. He was losing Dean, the same way Dean had lost him. He wondered if Dean had felt as helpless as he did right now, having come back and all of a sudden everything had changed, everything wasn't the way it was supposed to be. He hadn't felt this helpless in a long time. He remembered feeling helpless when he had found out about Dean's deal, when he saw his brother was struggling with his memories of hell, and he had hated not being able to help at the time, and he felt even worse now. This was worse because it was his fault Dean was being the way he was.
"Sam?" a voice called as they entered the caravan, and Sam looked up miserably.
He saw Diamond, leaning against the door to the caravan, looking at him in worry.
"Hey Diamond." He said, his voice tired and she flicked on the light, sitting next to him on the couch, her eyes trailing critically over the glass of whisky he had gotten himself when he had come in.
"Are you ok? We're all worried about the two of you, and Bobby's going off his head because neither of you are staying still long enough so he can plant his flask on you." She said with a slight smile, and Sam shrugged.
"I don't know. Dean's...he's angry. He's angry, he's guilty, he hates himself, he thinks he failed and he's lashing out at everyone who gets in the way. He wants to kill Lilith, and he doesn't care about what happens in the process, he's pushing everyone away. Ugh this is all my fault." He said in irritation, taking a sip of his whiskey, and Diamond looked at him incredulously.
"How the hell do you figure that out?" she asked in disbelief, and Sam looked out of the window, not wanting to tell her.
"It's my fault. I died, I left him alone again, and this time it was even worse because he's the one who did it. And he just can't cope with that." He said grimly, and she looked at him angrily.
Then slapped him.
"Ow!" Sam yelped in surprise, feeling the sting of her slap.
"You listen to me Sam Winchester, and you listen good. This isn't your fault. This is all Lilith's fault. She made Dean kill you, it's all on her. It isn't your fault that Dean is acting the way he is. You were dead, there was nothing you could have done to save yourself, and there was nothing Dean could have done to stop himself. Lilith killed you Sam, she just used Dean as her weapon of choice. And I'm willing to bet this is what she wanted. If you had stayed dead, it would have destroyed Dean to know that he was the one who killed you. But even so, coming back to life it's still completely twisted him up. He can't deal with the guilt from knowing he killed you and it's eating him alive. But none of this is your fault Sam." She said, a blazing expression in her eyes, and he felt his lips smile just a little bit.
"Ok, thanks. I needed that. But you didn't have to slap quite so hard." He said ruefully, and she shrugged.
"Brute force, the only way to get through to idiot male hunters. Missouri is even now sharpening her spoons so she can give Dean a good seeing to when he rears his head again. All he's going to do is push people away. And then, if he pushes you away, it'll finish him off. Was it him who hit you?" she asked, and he nodded.
"Yeah." He said, removing the ice pack from his jaw and she looked at it appraisingly.
"You've caught most of the swelling, you'll get a bruise but nothing worse. Did you try to talk to him?" she asked softly, and he rolled his eyes in exasperation at his brother.
"Yeah, of course I did. I tried to persuade him it was alright, that everything was fine, but he wasn't listening, he still blames and hates himself, and nothing I say or do is going to change that. He's consumed with getting revenge and I...I'm scared I'm going to lose him. I'm scared I've already lost him. He isn't him anymore, he's me like I was when I was on demon blood, or dad all his life... I don't know what to do. He's doing the exact same thing I did, becoming so consumed with getting revenge on someone who hurt the other that we become just as bad as the thing we're hunting. And now, he even wants me to take demon blood." He said miserably, and she squeezed his hand.
"You don't though. Besides, you heard Crowley, the only one strong enough to give you enough of a boost is him and I don't think he's going to let you suck him off anytime soon." She said without thinking and Sam shot her a look, half shocked, half amused at what she had said, and she cursed herself.
"You know what I mean." She said tartly.
"It's just...he wants me to become a monster, and I know my brother. He would use it as long as he needed too, then his infamous double standards would kick in and he would turn on me, call me weak, evil, a monster, someone getting ready to let Lucifer in just like last time, and I can't deal with that again. It destroyed us last time, me becoming addicted to demon blood and I had to work so hard to get him to trust me again, it felt like forever, and then I became soulless on top of it, and then I had to work off that too, and even when I finally think he trusts me again he goes behind my back. And I'm the only one who has to do it you know. Cas did just as much bad stuff as me, he betrayed us, sold us out to Crowley, went behind our backs, pronounced himself God, set loose a load of our old enemies, set loose the Leviathans which got Bobby killed and he destroyed my wall, but it doesn't seem like Dean bothers as much about him. I had to kiss his ass for years, I died, and I still felt like he didn't trust me, and Cas singlehandedly does everything I did all over again but does he get it constantly rubbed in his face? No. And I know Cas is insane but the point is still there, he doesn't make Cas kiss his ass like he did me, and he's screwed up too. And now he wants me to start taking the demon blood again so he can go all one man army against Lilith, and as soon as that's done, he'll turn on me and I can't go through all that again." Sam ranted, and she touched his cheek softly, calming him.
"Feel better?" she asked, and he nodded, smiling guiltily.
"A little yeah. And, I'm worried. He's trying to push me away and I'm scared that once he kills Lilith he's going to try and leave...maybe forever." Sam said worriedly, and she frowned.
"What, you think he might kill himself?" she asked in alarm, and he shrugged.
"Believe me, after the last few years it wouldn't be the first time either of us have considered it." Sam said miserably, staring at the scar on his hand, the memory of Lucifer and hell, which he quickly suppressed.
Diamond frowned.
"So what do we do?" she asked in concern, and Sam shook his head.
"That's the thing, I don't know what to do! I'm losing him again, and I...I don't know how to fix him, I hate feeling this helpless." Sam said, a tear running down his cheek which she wiped off with her thumb.
"You're not helpless. You're his brother. If anyone can fix this, its you." She said, and he gave her a thankful look.
"I hope you're right, because I'm not in the mood to lose my brother again." He said, sounding so determined but so sad and lonely at the same time that she couldn't help but reach to hug him.
And as she wrapped her arms around him to pull her closer, he hesitated slightly, then kissed her softly on the lips, before pulling back quickly.
"Sorry, I shouldn't have done that." He said in embarrassment, but she shook her head.
"It's ok, I liked it. But I was only trying to hug you to cheer you up." She said, and Sam smiled guiltily.
"Yeah sorry." He said, and was pulling away from her, so she leaned forward and kissed him again, and he reciprocated, stronger, more passionate this time before he pulled away hastily.
He hated the flicker of hurt that he had put in her eyes by doing that.
"Diamond, I'm sorry, it isn't you, it's just...if I get close to woman, usually the next thing I know is that they're dead, it isn't because I don't like you, because trust me, I really do." He said, and her eyes widened in understanding.
"Oh I see. I'm sorry." She said, letting go and flushing slightly, and Sam looked at her.
A beautiful girl, slim with beautiful brown eyes, long blonde hair with dark streaks through it, pale skin, who was funny, caring, understood the crap they dealt with, and here she was, helping him and Dean fight every monster in creation and also still finding time to try and cheer him up. What was he doing?
"Don't be." He said and leaned forward to kiss her again, this time his hand snaring her hair as he pressed his lips against hers.
She kissed back passionately, and Sam stood, as did she and he once more kissed her, one hand grabbing onto his long hair while the other began to undo his shirt. Sam held her against him, kissing her longingly as she guided him into the bedroom, making him fall down on the bed. Poised on top of him, he raised his hands and undid her clothes, and then leaned up to kiss her, and she reciprocated, slamming the door shut with a kick as the two of them lost themselves in a passionate frenzy, her hand stroking up his bare chest. And then she kissed him once more, and his problems ceased to exist.
XX
When he awoke the next morning, Sam found Diamond sleeping soundly next to him. Kissing her neck, he climbed out of the small bed, stretching.
"Good morning." She said happily as she awoke, rubbing her eyes and being greeted by a very nice sight.
"Yeah. You too." He said, and she looked at him guiltily.
"Um, do you think we're going to have to hide this from the others?" she asked sheepishly, and he shrugged.
"I don't think it'll be a problem, most of the others are too old and wise to wind us up about it, and Dean's too pissed to care, we should be fine. We're moving." He said worriedly, looking out the window in concern.
"Yeah, and if Dean's in charge, you can imagine where to." She said worriedly, watching in disappointment as Sam pulled on his jeans and tousled his hair to stop it looking so mussed.
"Damn it Dean." He cursed, pulling another shirt from his bag and sliding into it, and he grinned as he passed her her shoes.
"You might need those. And um, these." He said, grinning as he passed her more of her clothes that had been draped around the room.
The caravan was still relatively quiet. Marion was snoring in one of the seats, Meg gave them both a smug grin and ignored them, and it sounded like Tamara was in the bathroom.
"Where we going?" he asked as Diamond made them both some coffee.
"Lilith's house. Dean waited until we were all asleep last night, got to the wheel and drove us out of the city." Meg said, and Sam rolled his eyes.
Great, on top of everything else, he was drink driving. Resolving not to mention that little fact to Marion or Jody, he looked worriedly out at the coach.
"What are you doing Dean?"
XX
Crowley's house, well, Lilith's house now was a nice suburban affair. And it was also completely empty. Which suited Valente, after all, that bitch Lilith was a little too powerful for comfort. And at the moment he needed all the comfort he could get.
Roman was furious. The angels were beginning to break seals left right and centre, the Leviathans he had guarding them weren't up to the job, and the one he was entrusting to sort the problems they had by killing the Winchesters, Lilith and Raphael had screwed up time and again, and as a result, Edgar had now arrived.
And he was also not happy.
"You're lucky Dick doesn't bib you. The only reason he hasn't is the fact that we can't spare anyone else. The plan is moving forward, and we need to stop the angels launching the Apocalypse. But Valente, if you fail once more, I swear to you, I will eat you myself." He said in his deadly quiet voice, and Valente suppressed a shiver of fear.
"This plan will work sir, have no fear." He assured, and Edgar looked at him sceptically.
"And what makes you think this plan will work?"
"Haven't you heard the rumours?" Villar asked, and Edgar glowered at him.
"Roman and I don't deal in rumours, we deal in fact. And the fact is the three of you are so incompetent that the Winchesters and their allies have barely broken a nail since encountering you in the hospital. What rumours?" he demanded, and Featherstone stepped into fill the silence.
"Rumour has it that Sam Winchester was killed during an attack by Lilith. We know what Dean is like, how protective of his brother he is. If he blames Lilith in any way for his death, he will come here and he will be looking for revenge. That's why we're here. He comes, and we attack him and kill him. Simple. No more Winchesters." She said with grim delight.
Edgar nodded.
"Fine. I'll help you with this. But if this fails Valente, it'll be your head that'll be decorating my dinner table tonight." Edgar warned, and Valente gulped as Edgar strolled through the house away from the incompetents who had allowed the Winchesters to get far too far.
XX
"That's them alright." Charlie said as Emily drove her minivan along the motorway, keeping a fair bit away from the coach which they could just see ahead of them.
"You're sure?" Joshua demanded, and Charlie nodded.
"Yep. Bet you're glad I came along now, otherwise you might have missed them." Charlie said, and Weston glowered at him.
"Don't get too excited with yourself, all you did was check in with a couple of traffic cops. But I will admit, because of you it'll be that much easier to get to Sam and kill him." He said in satisfaction.
"What did he do anyway?" Charlie asked curiously, and Emily narrowed her eyes dangerously.
"He brutally murdered my father. His excuse is that he was possessed, but that's a pile of bull. Ever since day one, little Sammy Winchester has been bad news. Part of it was his father, he was a lousy dad. Part of it was Dean who indulged him. But that kid was born evil. He started developing weird powers that he used against hunters. He set loose a whole bunch of demons in Wyoming, and then he started to use his powers more and more, and it ended with him becoming some sort of evil freak who turned on his brother. And then he kicked off the Apocalypse. Trust me, if anyone deserves death, it's Sam Winchester. Lot of good people are dead because of him. My father included. So, I'm going to split him open like he split my dad." Emily said, and Charlie nodded.
"So, you get Sam and I get Dean?" Charlie asked and she nodded.
"That was the agreement. And I'm the one who will change that." She said warningly, and Charlie nodded.
"Don't worry. I just want Dean for what he did to my brother." He said, and Joshua tapped him on the shoulder.
"Let me have a round or two with Dean first before you kill him. I owe that jumped up little queer." He snarled, and Charlie grinned as Emily edged them ever closer to the coach.
XX
Dean had parked the coach and caravan not far from Lilith's house. And now, he was insisting that they all go to scout it out, and if it seemed like it was inhabited, find her and kill her.
"Dean, we can't just go rushing in without a plan." Bobby said patiently, and Dean glowered at him.
"We go in, we overwhelm her, we decapitate her. There, a plan." He said, sliding the scythe into his jeans.
"Dean, this is foolhardy. Besides, there is angel protection on the place. I cannot get in." Aimo warned, and Cox frowned.
"That could be a problem. I'm good but I can't heal with a twitch of my nose." He said, and Aimo looked at him in confusion.
"I twitch my nose?" he asked, and Jody smiled.
"No sweetie, he's talking about a tv show, way before your time." She assured him, and Aimo nodded.
"I see. So what can I do?" Aimo asked, not liking this plan at all but still wanting to be part of it.
"You can stick around in case we need you. We'll try and find some way to get you in." Dean said, not really caring, and Aimo glowered at him, but as Sam said stood his ground.
"Dean, this is stupid! We know you want Lilith dead, and we agree, but this isn't the way to do it. We'll be attacking her at home, where she's stronger!" Missouri said, noting with satisfaction the small bruise on his temple where she had whacked him with a metal ladle the night before.
"They're right Dean. All this is going to do is get people killed. We're not saying we won't do it, we're saying that we'll wait, think things through and then make a move." Marion said, and Dean slammed his fist into the table in frustration.
"Don't you guys get it? The longer she's alive, the stronger she gets, and that brings the Apocalypse closer! I'm trying to save this crappy world, and if we kill her sooner rather than later, it'll be a damn site easier!" he yelled.
Sam narrowed his eyes at his brother.
"Yeah, but this isn't about saving the world, this is about revenge. And don't glare at me Dean, you know I'm right." Sam said angrily, sitting beside Diamond, and Dean glared at him as if he had betrayed him.
"Yeah it is. I want her dead for what she's done. Sue me. You were just the same once." He reminded his brother, and Sam clenched his fist angrily.
"Yeah I was and all it caused was problems. I'm hoping you'll learn from my mistakes." Sam said, keeping his voice civil, but with great effort.
Dean looked at him dismissively.
"Don't you preach to me after everything you've screwed up Sam. We're doing this my way." He ground out, and Sam stood, as if to pounce on his brother from across the table, but Jody, Diamond and even Meg restrained him.
"You've screwed up too Dean. So don't take the high ground with me, because I know just how much you've screwed up over the years. Maybe not as badly as me, but just as often." Sam snarled back, and Dean flinched, he hadn't actually expected Sam to fight back.
"Oh yeah. What did I screw up then?" Dean demanded, and Sam smiled darkly.
"Lisa and Ben for a start." He hissed, and Dean looked as if he had been slapped, and Bobby intervened before this got ugly.
"Enough you pair! Belligerent edjits, act your age. Dean, stop baiting your brother. Sam, stop rising to his bait, it's what he wants. Now Dean, I don't know what the hell is going on in that head of yours, but your plan is only going to get people killed. So this is what we're going to do. A small group of us will go in, give the place a quick shufty, we come back, then we make a plan. Got it?" Bobby asked, and Dean and Sam, both glaring at each other, nodded, not speaking.
"Good. Now, Dean, Sam, Marion, Reynolds, Meg, you're with me. The rest of you, stay here." Bobby ordered, and the others all nodded as they headed back to the caravan to get supplies.
XX
Sam knew he shouldn't feel bad. Dean had deserved it. But he did feel bad, it had been a low blow bringing up Lisa and Ben. So, as the others milled around outside, and as the ones from the coach split off to get supplies or fuel or to get some sun, he approached Dean who was selecting a weapon from the duffel under the bed he had slept in the night before with Diamond. But as he lingered in the doorway, he thought of what Dean had said. That if he didn't have to protect Sam he would be better off. That Sam was useless. That he didn't need Sam anymore. He knew Dean was angry, but what if he was simply venting his true feelings at long last? Telling Sam how he really felt?
"Dean?" he asked softly, and Dean's hand clenched, and Sam edged a little backwards in case Dean swung for him.
"What Sam?"
"I wanted to say I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought up Lisa and Ben." He said, and Dean glared at him.
"Yeah. You shouldn't have." He said angrily, sliding a knife into his pocket, and Sam glowered at him. He had started it after all.
"And I also seem to remember telling you that if you ever talked about it again, I would break your nose." Dean said angrily, advancing on Sam, and Sam took a fearful step backwards, fearing his brother was going to hit him again.
"Dean..." Sam said fearfully, wondering how his brother could have changed so much, all because of something he had done, but Dean's fist, while clenched, didn't rise.
"Enough. Let's just get this done." Dean said briskly, heading for the door, but Sam made no move to get out of the way of the bedroom door.
"Dean, please, what is wrong? This isn't you, you aren't acting like you. I want my brother back. Please." Sam begged, and Dean glowered at him.
"You ever think maybe your brother doesn't want to come back to you Sam? Ever think that you might be the reason your brother keeps screwing up?" he asked savagely, and Sam flinched.
"All the time." He whispered pitifully, and Dean gave him a sour look.
"Good. Now, let's go." He said, shouldering past Sam.
Sam looked at his brother, hurt and fear and anger filling him. His Dean was gone, he was completely gone. This new one, the one that cared only about revenge, didn't care how much he was hurting Sam. In fact, he seemed to be revelling in it. After everything they had been through together, done for each other, he had thought he had meant more to Dean than that. Maybe he did, to normal Dean. But angry, uncaring, revenge driven Dean was a whole different matter.
"Do you really not need me anymore?" Sam asked, and he saw Dean hesitate, before he turned and gave him a cold look.
"No." He said simply, and Sam turned away from him, resentment and hurt building within him. Usually he refrained from smacking his brother, even when he deserved it and invited Sam to do it, but still, he couldn't help but want to smash his brother's brains in for being such an idiot the last couple of days.
"Then why are you so bitchy that I died? Because whatever else you want to tell yourself Dean, this is about me dying on you. It was an accident. I don't blame you, I don't hate you. Well not for that anyway," he said coldly, and he could see the ghost of hurt in Dean's angry eyes, "but you aren't being you! I don't blame you, it wasn't your fault, it was an accident, so please stop acting like such a jackass and go back to being my big brother!" he pleaded, and he could see the emotional vulnerability opening up in Dean, and he began to hope that he had finally gotten through to him.
Until his mask went back into place.
"You done? Lilith's still out there. Get a weapon." Dean ordered, and Sam shot him a look of deepest loathing as he turned to the bed to pick a knife.
And then he felt Dean wrap his arm around his neck, squeezing him in a chokehold. Sam gasped and tried to pull at Dean's arm, trying to free himself, but Dean's grip around his neck was too tight. Sam hit Dean's arm and he felt his legs go heavy, his eyes rolled in his head and he passed out, going limp in Dean's arms.
"I'm sorry Sam. I'm doing this to protect you. And I swear I'll make it up to you." Dean said sadly as he raised Sam onto the bed, moving the weapons to the floor as he placed his unconscious brother under the covers to keep him warm.
He knew he was being an idiot, knew his anger was pushing away the one who loved him the most. But he couldn't be affected by sentiment. He had to kill Lilith, it was the only way Sam was going to be safe. He had to protect Sam. It was the only way he could make things right.
"I'm sorry Sam. Please forgive me." Dean whispered, stroking his brother's hair back from his face, before turning away and putting his angry, emotionless mask back on.
He had a demon to hunt.
Lilith was going to die.
XX
The team, which Bobby thought suspiciously didn't contain Sam, edged forward. Dean, Bobby, Marion, Reynolds, Meg and Garth all looked at each other cautiously, and Dean opened the front door to the mansion that was once Crowley's, but now belonged to the queen of hell.
They entered the house, weapons held aloft, all looking at each other suspiciously.
"Where did you first meet Crowley?" Meg asked, demon killing knife held in her hand.
"In the drawing room." Dean responded, and following him, they made their way quietly through the house.
Bobby however was worried. The absence of Sam showed just how much Dean's reckless, angry attitude was affecting his relationship with his brother, and the sneaky little sod kept leaving his flask elsewhere so he couldn't berate him about it. If he didn't stop, he was going to lose Sam, and everyone else for that matter, and not to death, just to his own self destructive ways. But along with worrying about Sam, he was also worried about this place. It was quiet, far too quiet. There wasn't a sign that anyone was living here, and it was freaking him out. After their last encounter with Lilith, he wasn't in any particular hurry to face her again, but he was hoping that by killing her, Dean would go back to normal, well at least as normal as he ever was. But the lack of any sign of habitation was making him very uneasy.
The group entered the drawing room, and Dean could see someone was sitting in the chair by the fireplace, a glass of whisky in their hand. He silently drew the scythe, advancing despite Garth shaking his head at him. Bobby looked around. This wasn't right, it was far too easy. In fact it smelled like a...
"Hello Dean. Nice to see you again." A voice said from the shadows.
Trap.
Dean spun around to see the Leviathan, Edgar, stalking out of the shadows, flanked by Villar and Featherstone. Dean quickly turned to see Valente give him a smug smile as he rose from the chair he had been sitting in.
"Where's Lilith?" Dean demanded, and Edgar shrugged.
"Not here. Probably lording it up in hell, gloating about how she killed your brother. Either way, she isn't here, and we are." He said, smiling slightly.
"Drop your weapons." Valente ordered, advancing on them all.
"Dean, if we get out of this alive, I'm going to kill you." Meg hissed.
Reynolds glared at Valente, gun pointed at his head.
"Tell me one thing, because even the boys aren't sure on it...are you the real Valente, or just a clone?" he asked, and Valente gave him an indulgent smile.
"Why Fred, I'm a clone. Your friend Valente died quite some time ago. He was rather nice spread on toast." Valente hissed, and though Reynolds' hand shook, his aim was still quite steady.
"Bastard." Reynolds said, and Meg looked at Dean, giving him a significant glance, and doing the same with Bobby, who nodded.
And then Dean shot at Edgar, splattering black blood onto the wall.
At the noise, Garth, Marion and Reynolds opened fire, blowing holes in the brains of the Leviathans.
"Run for it, I'll hold them off!" Bobby yelled and the others turned tail and ran out of the drawing room, and Bobby called on his anger, sending items in the room hurtling through the air, slamming into the Leviathans. Featherstone roared, teeth showing and came at him, chomping down on the arm he raised to ward her off, and to his great surprise, Bobby felt pain as the sharp rows of teeth plunged deep enough to draw blood if he had been alive.
"We can affect ghosts too you know." She gloated, roaring again, preparing to strike a deadly blow.
"Balls!" Bobby cried, flickering out.
The group ran for the door, guilt filling Dean. He had walked them headlong into the Leviathans trap, gotten them all killed...
Edgar appeared out of nowhere, but Reynolds was too quick for him, smacking him in the mouth before he even considered showing his fangs. Garth shot the lock on the door and it swung open, Reynolds running through it. Valente and Villar then appeared from nowhere, Valente going for Garth, but Garth shot him in the hand and rolled through the door, and Marion elaborately dodged Villar's attack, following him through. Meg arced her leg up to knock Edgar from her path as she too made it to the door and got out into the sunlit courtyard.
Leaving Dean alone. Valente roared furiously, showing his teeth and swung at him. Meg turned to see Dean in trouble and was running back, but to her great surprise, Dean saw her coming, and fished the flask from his pocket. Sidestepping Valente, he elbowed him in the mouth before throwing the flask to her. Meg watched as Valente recovered, grabbed Dean by the back of the neck, and slammed his head into the wall. Dean collapsed to the floor, unmoving, and as the Leviathans roared, she made good her escape, leaving Dean behind.
XX
Sam groaned as he woke up. His brother had knocked him out. He was going to kill him, brother or not, he was going to kill Dean. The idiot had endangered them all with his antics, they had gone on far enough. Resolving to smack his brother the next time he saw them, he shook his head to clear it and opened the door, to see Tamara, Missouri and Jody, playing cards, looking up at him in shock.
"Sam? I thought you were with the others, what were you doing in there?" Jody asked in surprise.
"Dreaming about Dean." Sam snapped back, drinking some cold coffee to clear his head a bit quicker.
"Oh?" Tamara asked in a teasing voice, and he gave her a cold smile.
"Nothing interesting sicko, I was plotting how to kill him. The idiot got me in a chokehold and left me behind in some misguided attempt to protect me." He bit out, just as shouts came from outside.
"He did what? I'll kick him up the ass!" Missouri said, following Sam as he ran outside to see the hunting party arriving.
And his heart dropped when he saw that they were a person short.
"Where's Dean?" he demanded anxiously, and Bobby flickered back beside him, looking grim.
"The big mouths have got him. It was a trap." He explained, and Sam swore violently, making Aimo look at him with wide eyes as he left the coach with the others.
"Leviathans? What happened to Liilith? Did they kill her?" Marge asked hopefully, but Meg shook her head.
"Doubt it. The chompers must have moved in after she left, they reckon she's in hell. They've been waiting for us to show up, they knew Dean would come here, and now they have him." She said worriedly.
"And you just left him?" Sam demanded, his voice high pitched.
"We didn't have a choice Sam. But Valente knocked him out, so I think he might be in for some torture before they kill him, which means we have time to get him out." Marion soothed him.
Sam nodded, getting himself under control. Yes he was worried about Dean, but he had to think this through, otherwise they were all screwed.
"Alright. We can't let the Leviathans kill Dean, I want that special pleasure myself. And he may have been an angry, reckless jackass the last two days, but he's still my brother. So, let's put our heads together and see if we can figure out a way to save my asshole brother so I can kill him myself." He snarled, and with Diamond falling into step beside him, they all headed into the coach.
XX
Further down the road, Garrett smiled, having used a small microphone to pick up the gist of what they were saying, their car hidden by a parked lorry.
"Dean's been captured by the Leviathans. Sam is mounting a rescue for him." He reported to Emily, who smiled.
"Good." She said, and Vance looked at her curiously, and also slightly lustfully.
"Shouldn't we just let the Leviathans have him and go in and kill Sam now?" he asked, but she shook her head.
"After what he did to my father, I want Sam to suffer before I kill him. Which means he will get to see his precious big brother die before I kill him myself." She said, and Charlie smiled.
"Good, means I still get to kill him. What do you have in mind?" he asked, and she pulled out a trunk from beneath one of the benches in the back of her van.
And they all whistled appreciatively as they saw the weapons she had stored there.
XX
Dean woke up in the kitchen, to find he was tied down to the kitchen table, with Featherstone standing above him, smiling darkly.
"Good, you're awake. I was getting bored. Now the fun can begin." She said, walking slowly towards him, a vicious looking cleaver in her hand.
"Fun? Sorry but you aren't my type." Dean said, and she gave him a grim smile.
"Not the sort of fun I have in mind. After all, I always enjoy myself when I cook." She said, and Dean gulped a little, as she put down the cleaver and picked up some scissors.
"Um, no offence lady, but I prefer take outs." He said nervously as she came to his left hand side, smiling down at him patronisingly.
"Such a naughty little human. Take outs give me wind. Not to worry. Now, to unwrap the food." She said, and Dean yelped in pain as she stuck the scissors into his chest by accident.
"Whoops, mustn't spoil the meat." She said, and Dean thrashed, but with his arms and legs bound to a table leg each, aside from being very uncomfortable, it also meant he could do nothing to stop her as she cut off his shirt and cast it aside, leaving him bare chested in the cool kitchen air.
"How's dinner coming?" Valente asked as he entered the kitchen with the others and she waved at them patiently.
"It will take a while. Come back later." She said irritably, and Edgar smiled down at Dean.
"Don't die too quickly Winchester, you deserve to live through as much of it as possible. Hmm, I think I'll send Roman your head, he can roast it himself." Edgar said, and Dean realised just how much trouble he was in.
Captured by Leviathans, he was about to be chopped up and eaten. He was about to be eaten by these monsters, and Sam...
Sam. His baby brother. The one who he had been pushing away, the one who he had been trying to protect. Dean closed his eyes in anger and disgust with himself. He had tried to convince himself that treating Sam like that would make him more independent, mean he could stand on his own two feet without relying on Dean. It would mean that no matter what happened, he would be safe, if Dean died his brother would live on.
But now, trapped on a kitchen table about to become human stew for a Leviathan's dinner, he regretted it all. All the things he had said to Sam. His own anger, self hatred and guilt, and he had once again directed them at Sam. He recalled every sad, hurt look Sam had given him over the last two days. Sam probably thought Dean hated him, blamed him for what had happened to him. The only person to blame was Dean himself. Dean had treated him horribly, to try to persuade him to stand alone, to be strong on his own, but who had he been kidding? Everyone knew how reliant the boys were on each other. Dean needed Sam as much as Sam needed Dean. Dean had been awful in what he had tried to do, and had seriously hurt his little brother. He had even suggested Sam take demon blood again, what sort of brother did that? The sort that was worse than the lousy sort. But Dean couldn't help but be proud of Sam. He had his big brother telling him to take the demon blood, the one he needed the most to support him, and he had still not done it. He had refused to take the blood, even for Dean. What sort of brother tried to make a former addict fall off the wagon? A jerk that was who. But Sam had resisted, and despite being hurt and upset by Dean's treatment, his little brother had been there all the time, trying to persuade Dean to talk to him, as usual just wanting to help.
And Dean had told him that he didn't need him anymore, that it was all his fault what had happened, that he was to blame for the mess Dean was in. The things Sam feared the most, and Dean had done them coldly and callously to hurt his brother.
The last thing he had said to Sam when he had been conscious was to tell him he didn't need him anymore. He knew he had been being a jerk, annoying everyone, hurting Aimo and more importantly Sam, but wrapped in his own anger and self loathing, he had kept going. He had threatened to attack, and it was with a guilty pang that he remembered hitting Sam the night before, and Sam edging away from him in fear, the same fear he had had in Dillimore, the fear that the one he loved had turned on him.
Dean groaned sadly. He had hurt his brother so badly, scared him, frightened him, rejected him, and now he was about to become a monster's appetiser. Served him right. His only regret was the fact that he would never get to see Sam again, to apologise to him, to assure him that he hadn't meant all he said, to tell him he was proud of the way he rejected the temptation of taking demon blood even when his brother had been urging him to do so. Dean snorted at himself. He had wanted to make his brother back into a monster, something vile. He was the vile one. He had called Sam a monster before, but this time, he was the monster, and he hated what he had become.
He would never get to see Sam again. And he would die, and Sam would spend the rest of his life tormented by what his brother had said, wondering if his brother really had secretly hated him.
Dean looked up as he realised that Featherstone was rubbing olive oil over his body.
"What the hell are you doing?" he demanded, and she smiled.
"Oiling the meat to give the skin that nice, crispy taste." She said, and he looked at her in horror.
"Wait, you are actually going to cook me?" he demanded hysterically, and she looked at him in bemusement.
"Well of course, I'm not going to eat you raw, I'm not an animal." She said, twisting salt and pepper onto him, the pepper making him sneeze.
"You sick bitch!" he said, and she gouged out a chunk of his chest, about the size of a fingernail, making Dean scream in pain.
"I do like garlic in my dinner." She said, stuffing a clove of garlic into the small hole she had just made.
Dean screamed as she repeated the process, struggling, the oil running down his skin, the smell of garlic getting up his nose along with the pepper.
This was it. This was how he was going to die, he was going to be roasted and eaten by monsters who were making him into a Sunday roast.
"Hmm, some spices I think." She said, picking up a bit of cayenne pepper and sprinkling it onto his bare chest, making contact with the small wounds and he howled in pain as it stung.
"No, please, stop!" he screamed, and she hummed to herself as she put a dash of lemon juice onto him, making him scream in pain as the citrus stung his wounds.
"Hmm, what else?" she asked, until a bullet round blew a hole through her head, spraying her blood across the back wall.
Dean, still shuddering in pain, looked around to see Sam rushing down the stairs into the kitchen to free him, gun in hand.
"Dean!" Sam cried in relief, his expression frantic and turning to horror as he saw what she had been doing to his brother.
"Sam, I..." he begun, but Sam cut him off with a filthy glare.
"I'm not talking to you, and I'm only saving your stupid ass so I can kick it myself." He snarled, and Dean wisely went quiet as Sam freed him from the table and helped him to his feet, the garlic falling from the gouges in his skin. Sam handed Dean a gun, just as Featherstone got back to her feet, glowering at them both.
"I hate it when the dinner doesn't stay for dinner." She growled, rearing back her head and roaring, only to be shut up for a bit by a bullet from both brothers.
Turning, they ran up the stairs from the kitchen, to see a battle in full swing, as Bobby smashed a window and sent the glass hurtling at the three Leviathans.
"Why'd he do that? We can't get out that window, it's too small." Dean said, grinning slightly as Meg kicked Villar in the throat.
"I know. But Aimo can get in, he was bringing down the protection." Sam explained, and as he did so, the young angel appeared, earning a furious roar from Edgar.
Aimo drew his sword as the Leviathan charged at him, and he sent a white pulse into the monster. However, the attack barely slowed the beast, and swearing, which he had almost certainly picked up from Dean, he appeared behind Edgar, grabbed him and vanished.
"Aimo!" Sam yelled in panic, but a second later, the angel appeared again, grinning widely.
"Turns out he can't swim very well, I dropped him in the Gulf of Mexico!" he said brightly, and Sam grinned.
"Alright, we've got Dean, let's get out of here people!" Marion yelled, joining the others in firing multiple rounds at Valente, while Meg kicked Villar into a bookcase which toppled on top of him.
Featherstone had come up from the kitchen, her face a picture of fury as she advanced upon them, roaring as she did so. Jody smiled and fired the flare gun, and the Leviathan screeched as the burning shot landed right in her open mouth, fire belching from inside her.
"Good shot!" Diamond said as the group clustered together, making for the door.
They dashed through the hallways, making for the front door, their way clear. Diamond looked around, out to the black night outside, and she knew they were almost free. They got to the doorway and banged it open, leaving the three remaining Leviathans furiously behind, and they dashed across the dark courtyard.
"Back to the coach and let's get the hell out of here!" Marge said, taking a look back and not liking what she saw as the three Leviathans ran out of the house, catching up with them.
Diamond could have sworn she saw something move out the corner of her eye, but dismissed it. They were nearly to the gates when a van stopped right in front of it, dispelling the vampires, who were hissing maliciously.
Thrown by their sudden appearance, the group stumbled to a stop.
"Hello folks. Miss me?" Gordon asked, clearly fully healed and out for revenge.
"How did they get here?" Garth asked in shock, as the group clustered together, Sam, Dean and Bobby doing some very quick thinking on how the hell they could get out of this one.
"We have Leviathans coming up behind us." Tamara said worriedly as the monsters got closer, roaring as they approached.
Diamond looked around, her mind working overtime as she tried to think of a way out of this one, when a small, red laser light appeared on Sam's chest. Gasping, she moved without thinking as a shot rang out, strangely loud despite the clamour of the vampires and the Leviathans.
Sam looked at Diamond as she came to a stop in front of him, and as the bang resounded across the courtyard, he immediately felt his heart clench in panic. No, no, no...
And Diamond, a small red hole in the centre of her head, gave a weak sigh and fell back into his arms, blood leaking from the wound in her head, her eyes closing as she fell.
"NO!" Sam screamed hysterically, as the hunters, led by Emily who was holding a smoking sniper rifle, emerged from the bushes, grinning victoriously, their weapons covering both the vampires, the group and the Leviathans.
Dean looked down in shock as he saw Sam cradling Diamond's dead body, feeling sick as Joshua and the others advanced, weapons raised. They were trapped, Diamond was dead and it was all his fault.
Looking down at Sam crying over Diamond's body, guilt rising in his gut as he saw how much pain he had just inflicted on his little brother in his quest for revenge, he moved forward to cover Sam with his body as the others hustled together, weapons raised, as three deadly enemies advanced upon them, ready to kill them all.
Ha, managed two chapters in one day!
Now, I know some of you were opposed to romance for the boys, and I have decided not to put Dean with anyone (and after the way hes been acting who would sleep with him anyway), but I did always intend for Sam and Diamond to get together...for a while. Did anyone really expect her to survive with her flirting with Sam? Sleep with Sam Winchester and die after all (not entirely sure that would be a bad thing). So, I hope you dont mind that I put that in.
And Dean went ever so slightly crazy, and now Diamond is dead and his relationship with Sam is on the rocks. How will Sam react to Diamond's death? Will he blame Dean? Will Dean manage to get Sam to forgive him? Speaking of, notice Dean hasnt called Sam Sammy since he's lost it. Will Dean be able to make it up to his little brother?
Featherstone really is a crazy bitch, who sticks garlic in people? Womans a real nutter...
And Emily has made her first kill, and she may very well have others before the end of all this. And I know I promised two deaths but I decided to move the next one to the start of the next chapter instead.
Oh, I meant to say on the last chapter but I forgot, the deaths of the angels breaking the seals that were unexplained might come up in a future story...
Sorry to any Edgar fans but I couldnt really have him around as we go towards the finale, but we havent seen the last of the big league Leviathans. Desperate times will soon call for desperate measures...
So once again, we are in a rock and a hard place, Dean and Sam's relationship is on the rocks, another member of the group is dead and I'm still no closer to figuring out how long this will be.
Next time we see the aftermath, we get another death (I think), a visit from Crowley and the return of the angels as the road to the Apocalypse gets more and more bumpy!
Hope you're enjoying so far, please read and above all else review the latest chapters, I'll be very appreciative!