Chapter 9

Truth be told

James stood in silence, he didn't know what to say, nor did he want to speak. He looked at Lily full shock in his eyes.

"James, are you alright?" Lily asked. He nodded furiously.

Lily looked at him, "Are –"Lily began. James ran to him bathroom and shut the door immediately,

'Crap, crap, crap' he thought. He reached for his wand, "Damn". It was on his desk. Lily went to the bathroom door.

"James!" she called out. James didn't hear her, he looked around, there was no way out. He turned back to the door and heard Lily's voice.

"James, it's alright, I won't laugh, if that's what you think," Lily said. Suddenly the door began to open slowly. Lily stepped away a bit and looked in. James came into view. He still looked embarrassed.

He smiled a little and came out; he passed Lily and went to his desk. Lily turned around as he passed. She didn't say anything; she took her wand out and pointed it to herself down at her self. She counter cursed her voice spell. She walked towards James, whose back was towards her.

She tapped his shoulder. James turned around. He looked to Lily.

"Scripture is a hard word to say," she said in her normal voice. James's eyes widened, Lily nodded, "I even have trouble," she said. 'she is deaf,' he thought, 'but that means she knows I' am as well,'

-I'm sory I startled you, do you use sign language?- Lily signed. James smiled,

-yes- he signed. Lily smiled.

-you don't have to be embarrassed- James shrugged, -no one knows that I'm deaf, except the guys, but even they forget because of the charm- he signed. Lily nodded.

-Same with my friends-

"Yeah," James said.

"Why do you use a charm?" he asked.

"Why do you?" Lily responded.

"Cuz my parents encourage it greatly, especially at school, because they fear my education will suffer without it," he said.

"Really, my parents discourage it for me now that I'm legal, they think I'm abusing my magic . . . seriously I couldn't use it all summer,"

James smiled, "that must be hard," Lily shook her head, "I prefer using my natural voice, actually, but at times I just want to use my charm."

"Can we talk to each other in our normal voices?" James asked, "I suppose,"

"Or we can do sign, I know you know how, seeing as you just did, as well as I . . . but Ashley said that you didn't I asked her about it, because I saw you three conversing with it in the Leaky Cauldron, but she denied the whole thing, why?"

"Because I didn't want anyone to know, it's a muggle disability, plus I usually used the charm," James nodded, "Sorry for running off, I've just never let anyone know, no one. I would be shattered if any one else knew,"

"Why?" Lily asked.

"Because I've got a reputation here, people know me for quidditch, being a marauder, a prankster, one who speaks normally and who can hear."

"Yes but your disability shouldn't affect you I that way, you shouldn't be ashamed of it,"

"Yes but it was a major hit for my parents, I'm the first out of the line of Potters to be deaf, no one in my family is, my parents were crushed when they found out, hence why the demand that I use the charm, I guess they're just angry, they blame themselves,"

"They shouldn't, my parents were shocked as well, but I went to the BSL academy, British sign language academy as well as a speech therapist for the deaf to work on my speech, how did you learn sign language and to speak?"

"My parents sent me to a muggle school for the deaf, when I was little; I learned both there, though speech has been the hardest, as you can see." Lily nodded,

Well we have rounds, we should get going- she signed, James nodded. He took his wand out.

"No, don't," Lily said, James looked to her, "Don't charm your self. It's just rounds; I doubt many people will be out."

James shook his head, "Lily I can't go out there like this," Lily looked puzzled, "Why not?" James looked to her, "Be-because no one's heard me talk this way, I'd look a fool, no I can't go with out the charm in public,"

"James it isn't that hard," Lily said,

"Not that hard? Lily barely speak like this at home, let alone here, no, I can't you don't understand, I literally can't,"

Lily couldn't believe he was actually scared. "James there's nothing to be afraid of, it's who you are-"

"Not to everyone who knows me Lily, it's not!," James pointed his wand at himself and performed the charm, "I'm sorry I just can't do it," he said now in his modified voice.

Lily looked down, "James you're going to have to do it some time," James rolled his eyes, "Well when that day comes I will, but for now I'll use the charm,"

"Why are you being so stubborn?" Lily exclaimed,
"I'm not stubborn!" James yelled, "Why don't you use your natural voice then, seeing as you're so used to it at home, huh?"

Lily began to become angry, "James that's not the point," "Yes it is Lily!" "You use it to the same extent as me, and yet you're bashing me for using it,"

"Yes that's true James, I do use it with the same extent, yet I'm not ashamed of it as you clearly are from the fear on face, I use it because I'm in a new world, where there is close no deaf population and the wizarding world isn't clearly informed of the disability itself, clearly shown through our muggle studies class, which only covers the deaf community in it's advanced level class!" Lily said.

James "I'm not stubborn, it was just how I was brought up, always being told to use the charm . . . though true I'll admit, yes I'm scared of what people will think, but I'm not ready to face that, Lily, I'm not. Call me immature, or stubborn all you want, but there is no way in hell that I'll walk out of this dormitory, without the charm upon me,"

Lily looked down, "Fine, do what you want, do what feels comfortable, honestly I think you shouldn't give a shit about what people think, but that's just me."

James didn't say anything. "We have rounds we should go," Lily said. James followed her out of his room and they exited their dormitory. They walked the halls in search of students out of bounds; they caught several fifth years in the closets and others just out of boundary areas. They continued their way down the corridors.

"Must be feeling happy for walking next to the filthy little mudblood," a voice said. James and Lily turned to the voice and saw Malfoy and Snape.

"What was that Malfoy?" James asked drawing his wand.

"I said you must be enjoying yourself with the mudblood, it sickens me to see the sight of you two, a pureblud and mudblood as heads, disgusting, Dumbledore's beginning to head for the deep end," Malfoy replied.

"Shut up Malfoy," Lily snapped. Malfoy looked to Snape, "oo, the mudblood's feisty, not,"

"Sod off Malfoy!" James said fiercely.

"Ha, whatever Potter, can't believe you actually like this piece of trash,"

"Locomoto mortis!" James bellowed.

"James!"

"Incedium caprincey," Snape bellowed. James hit the floor shaking. Lily drew her wand "Petr" She began

Severus pointed his wand at her.

Suddenly Lily rose into the air and was dangling; Snape performed the counter curse for Locomoto mortis and ran off with him down the hall.

Lily's wand fell from her hand, and her skirt folded over, revealing her under garments.

James got him self to stop shaking and he regained his ground he looked around, "Lily?"

"Aahh, James, help!" Lily exclaimed holding up her skirt the best she could, James looked up, he pointed his wand "Liberacorpus" he said in his mind. Lily then was descended down to the ground. She got up and quickly brush her clothing and straightened out her uniform.

"Thanks," she said quickly. "Forty points from Slytherin and another twenty for their rude behavior," she stammered.

"Another Fifty points, for being ass holes." James said. "Come on," Lily said picking up her wand and holding it tightly in her grip. James followed her down the hall, "Are you alright?" he asked.

"Oh I'm great, just fine, James," she snapped sarcastically. She looked away, 'That was rude' she thought. She looked back to James. "Sorry, I just really hate those two,"

James looked to her and nodded. "We should get back," he said and Lily agreed. They entered their dorm and lily retreated to her room. She changed for bed, and went to sleep. James stayed up for a bit think about what Lily had said, she was right, he was stubborn and fearful of his image, but how could he not be, he was widely popular amongst boy the male and female population and slip of his disability would cause major criticism. What was he to do?"

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