The Great Kouhai Exchange

Day 3: Fabulous Love Affair

Tezuka really couldn't think of anything to say, let alone do anything, so he just stared.

Clearly, everyone made a mistake by calling Fuji a genius because he did a lot of stupid things. First, Fuji exchanged the Prince of Tennis for the Prince of Rambling. And then Fuji forced him to cut Shinji's hair with a sword... and although it turned out rather well, it was still dangerous.

Still, if there was one thing he learned from studying with Fuji Syuusuke for more than half a decade, it was that you must never go against Fuji. Ever.

Which is the reason why Tezuka was just nodding along, while his poor, poor teammates gave him pleading looks.

X

"But Fuji-senpai, do we really have to do this?" said Momoshiro, who just wanted to eat burgers.

Fuji just smiled and handed the regulars, plus the Ichinen Trio minus Horio and Shinji pieces of paper that looked like they were torn from his notebook.

FABULUZ LOVE AFFAIR

Ryuuzaki likes Echizen who doesn't know.

Ibu comes along and makes Echizen jelus.

Ibu is confused when Ryuuzaki and he are locked up in a room.

Ryo-chan realizes hes in love and duels with Ibu who realy doesn't love Ryuuzaki!

And then they kill each other like real mehn by wrestling!

And then we kill the horrible monsterr called Mizuslut...!!

LETZ DO IT GAIZ!

Tezuka hated wrong grammar and malicious thinking and acts. Momoshiro didn't care. Kaidoh didn't care either. Inui thought Fuji wrote better than that. Oishi didn't want to be part of this; Eiji did. Kawamura didn't feel good about this. The freshmen trio minus Horio were up to anything their senpais wanted.

X

When a boy and girl were stuck in a room all alone, they were supposed to bicker, stare at the other's eyes, make out for a long time and leave with big and goofy grins on their faces. And then they become a couple.

But this was Shinji and Sakuno we were talking about. Sakuno, who loved Ryoma with all her heart and was nothing but devoted, and Shinji, who just rambled, tried to look pretty at everything, and didn't really care about anything else except for tennis, food and Tachibana.

They were two different souls but tonight, they were going to fall in love.

Or something much like that, anyway.

X

Sakuno sighed as she sat on the floor. She already tried hitting the door with a broom and she had been trying for thirty minutes. Now there was Shinji, a senpai. Senpais should help their kouhais instead of rambling their butts off and telling their kouhais to look at them.

Shinji was the worst senpai ever.

Sakuno can only stare and smile sweetly. Or, at least, she tried.

"Don't you know it's rude to stare? It makes me feel so uncomfortable. And don't twitch. Children these days..." Shinji rolled his eyes.

Clearly, this idiot didn't know what he wanted.

-

"What is he doing?" yelled Momoshiro, annoyed. "Now Ryuuzaki-chan will never fall for him! This sucks! I hate this!"

He made weird arm gestures, and almost pushed Fuji's laptop off the table.

The regulars stared at Momoshiro, annoyed, while the freshmen trio minus Horio just looked at Momoshiro worriedly. Maybe Momoshiro had gone mad without someone to crush his dreams. The theory that Ryoma made everyone insane might have to be thought of again.

"Shut up already!" yelled Kaidoh, earning annoyed looks from everyone.

Fuji placed a finger over his lips to silence the two. "Let's see what Ryuuzaki-chan and Ibu-kun are up to now..."

-

Sakuno sighed.

This all sucked.

She was stuck with a loser and not with Ryoma.

Now if there was Ryoma maybe... maybe... they'd hold hands, and he'd realize how he felt for her and maybe... just maybe... they'd kiss! Oh, her first kiss! With Ryoma-kun! They'll have a nice, big happy family. Girls with Ryoma's tennis skills and her looks! And all of them will try out for the boys' team and become regulars because they were just too good!

"You're thinking of something evil and malicious, I know it. Look at the way you're holding that knife. You're probably planning to commit seppuku or something. Life is a precious gift given to us, and we must live life the best we can. If we don't, then we'll be losers. Life isn't for losers. Life is for winners. Value life..."

The sad thing about Shinji, Sakuno realized, was that he liked to voice out his thoughts. And that Shinji liked taking the long route to his thoughts and repeating things.

Annoying bastard.

-

Tezuka sighed quietly. This was going nowhere and this was a waste of his time. He made a move to walk away,

Until he saw Ryuuzaki point the knife at Shinji.

He never thought girls could be cool before.

-

Sakuno sighed and put the knife down. If she killed Shinji, it would be obvious. Maybe she could just give him a blow on the head with a steel club or something.

There were no tennis rackets, and she didn't know how to throw a ball.

But there was a broom. She smiled [evilly] and reached for it. It looked like she was planning to kill Shinji.

"Why are you cleaning the room? We need to get out and all you can think of is cleaning? Women, what's up with them? They're so irritating, always giggling and why can't the world just be filled with men? Why can't I just do what I'm supposed to with boys instead? Much easier, really..."

Fucking sexist asshole.

No, make that stupid fucking sexist asshole.

-

Kikumaru gasped. Oishi looked away. Fuji smiled. Momoshiro and Kaidoh were stunned and hugged each other. Kawamura covered his eyes. Inui's eyes were gleaming maniacally. The Ichinen Trio minus Horio were almost crying at how Sakuno-chan can be so mean to a nice senpai who looked like Ryoma-kun! Tezuka was staring in awe, wondering why girls didn't act like this all the time.

When Konomi told you Tezuka liked serious and hard-working girls, well... he's right. It took real determination and guts to try and kill Ibu Shinji.

-

Shinji's eyes widened when he realized what Sakuno was trying to do. He pretended he didn't know. After all, he wasn't annoying for nothing. As a kid, people have tried to hit him with brooms for being annoying. He learned how to defend himself.

And then it all stopped.

Now Sakuno didn't know that, and she was about to.

If he had to hit a girl, then hit a girl, he shall.

But why do that when such thing can be avoided? She would probably pass out after a slap.

Sakuno froze.

She hid behind a locker and looked at Shinji pleadingly. She was only twelve! No, she had a future! She hadn't even kissed Ryoma yet! This was all happening too quickly!

But Shinji didn't make a move to hit her. He turned the door knob and for the first time in an hour, the two of them saw sunlight again.

Why hadn't they thought of that before?

-

Fuji opened his eyes. "You," said Fuji to the Inchinen Trio minus Horio, "didn't look the door."

The two looked at each other, then at Fuji, and then at each other again. "We, uh... It was an accident, really!"

Fuji looked at Tezuka and said: "Bring out the whips."

The Ichinen Trio minus Horio gulped and for once, Horio was lucky.

TO BE CONTINUED

Hey, this is your update. I'm sorry I haven't updated in such a long time. I hope I'm not on your hit list.

Anyway, thanks for reading and special thanks to: Cora (for kindly pointing out Yukimura has a younger sister) and Frogger (for mannishly pointing out that I missed out on some parts and for resurrecting Lin). -tackles both to the ground-