It has to do with biology… or not

X. SPOCK'S PLEA (SPOCK'S POV)

All the red alerts sirens he had ever heard combined couldn't compare to the dread Spock was actually going through: Jim definitely intended to stay - and James T. Kirk only ever did what he wanted to do.

Moreover, even if such a thought should have been terrifying enough on its own, it yet still paled in comparison to the fact that there was challenge now clearly audible in Jim's tone under the fierce determination - and that Spock felt it run through his blood, making a part of him hum in delight! Spock was horrified, both by Jim's plan and obvious provocation and acceptance of whatever might come to pass; but even more: by his own reaction to it. Jim had to leave. HAD TO.

Spock knew his next words would be one of his last chances to change his Captain's mind, and he weighed all his options carefully.

/

The first arguments that came to his mind were, of course, logical ones.

The ancient texts were indeed worrying about his chances of survival (Spock would never tell this to Jim, but after his research he had calculated that 82.54% of the ones who were mentioned to have gone through their Time without finding a mate had died, and that the remaining 17.46% had suffered from several degrees of brain damage). But, as Jim himself had also exclaimed earlier, the old chronicles were indeed not necessarily an exact source - for example, Vulcans had used to believe it impossible to survive Pon Farr off Vulcan; yet no Vulcan had died during his Time since the installation on the New Colony.

Then, nowadays, those who had achieved Kolinahr were unaffected by the whole process of Pon Farr, which meant that the purging of all emotions was a way to escape the ancient drives; and even if Spock knew he was very, very far from reaching such a level of discipline, meditation and control of one's mind and body (which any contemporary Vulcan could perform, contrary to their pre-Surak ancestors who had no idea of it) should help tampeng them down.

And last, but not least, Spock was half human. And not only could he logically hope that he would be less affected by his Time than a full Vulcan, but, more importantly, he also knew that he was better armed to face his Plak Tow. Full Vulcans never contracted fever, except when going through their Time, and their bodies had troubles dealing with the rare temperature raise. But Spock knew for certain that his metabolism could trigger fever independently from Pon Farr and was quite used to the condition; and he knew which chemicals worked on his metabolism for successfully lowering it. His father's undeniably evident worry the first time his temperature had risen as a child had been his first and unforgettable clue of the former; and his mother's insistence for staying on Earth until he would have contracted ALL human child diseases had taught both his parents and him the latter.

(He had not at the time exactly appreciated to be either sick in bed for days or brought time and time again to any playground and sandbox in the area (he really had not been fond of the sandboxes – human toddlers always seemed to find destroying his complicated constructs before they were done more enjoyable than building their own; but he had not been able to notice with a hint of sadness that human children, unlike his Vulcan peers, had no real problem with differences – skin colors, to mention only the most obvious to the eye, didn't appear to matter, and he himself had been regularly approached by children curious about his ears, and been told that they were 'so cool'…) but he had by now grown truly grateful for this period of his life.)

So, Spock had a plan. And a sounded plan.

But Spock knew none of those arguments would change Jim's mind right now. Because Jim's choices were not always necessarily logical, especially when they involved life or death. They were first and foremost instinctive; and Jim's instincts were mostly emotional.

So, Spock's best options were 1) to find emotional arguments which would undermine Jim's certainty in the fact that his course of action was the right option, and 2) to shred some of his Vulcan walls and make clear to Jim, more than anything, that he had motivation. Born not only out of survival instinct, but also because he had something to fight for. A place to get back to. Because this might be the language Jim might understand and consider to listen to…

/

"Captain, I understand that you want to help, and I am deeply grateful. But, just as you, as my friend, do not wish to see me harmed, you must realize that the last thing I want – as your friend – is to put you in danger - especially as I am the cause for danger."

Jim seemed ready to retaliate, so Spock quickly placated him.

"Besides, you have to see reason. In your current state, you would definitely not match my strength. And once free from your surveillance, who knows how many others I might come to harm, even in such a loosely populated area, if I was left to wander for days?"

To be honest, Spock really doubted he would ever be tempted to leave Jim's intoxicating presence, if it came to that. He was not lying though using this argument: statistically, the odds he might leave the cave did exponentially increase… if Jim was to die. This was Spock's worst fear, and no matter how horrendous the idea was, it was tangible and was not to be discarded - and was the reason Jim definitely had to leave. And as the sense of responsibility towards others was generally one of the most influential weights in Jim's decision-making's balance, Spock couldn't not press at it at the moment when it might successfully serve his cause.

Jim infinitesimally flinched, and Spock knew he had struck the right nerve and pushed his point, his voice uncontrollably turning oddly more decisive yet more begging the further he talked:

"I assure you, what you propose is not only hazardous, it is also counterproductive; whereas my course of action is the safest for all, including me, because I could never forgive myself if I was to harm you in any way - especially as I firmly believe it unnecessary for you to take risks to begin with while I cautiously prepared for facing my Time on my own.

You are wrong to think of me as suicidal (Spock couldn't use 'self-sacrificial' without lying, because he would be, especially if someone else's life was in the balance, and even more if that someone was Jim (also, how could Jim use this against Spock - after his own actions?); but he sure wasn't suicidal, right). I will fight this with all I have. After all, you taught me to refuse no-win scenarios. So you must trust me on this, Captain: I do intend to get back to our ship."

Spock paused, having reached the core of his plea. Jim's eyes seemed to soften, and Spock knew Jim had heard him, at least. So he begged with all he had, his eyes boring into Jim's:

"But I will need all my focus and energy, so you must understand that any presence would only act as an interference, and that, to actually help me, you do have to leave me alone."

And then, thinking about how he would feel if the situation was reversed, Spock got an idea of what might finally appease Jim enough for him to leave, and finished in a tone both serious and soothing:

"I realize though that with the knowledge you gained during our conversation you need for the sake of your peace of mind to monitor my condition somehow, and I agree to any kind of surveillance you might deem necessary - as long as you are physically a mile away from me by the time my Plak Tow hits."

Silence fell, and the longer Jim stayed silent the more confident Spock became, until, tentatively, he asked for confirmation:

"Captain, do we have an agreement?"