Day 10: Ten Years
Ten years we've been at this, Dean. Can you believe it? I know you would look at me and say, "Sammy, we've been doin' this shit since we were kids" and you would be right. But I'm not counting those years, Dee, I'm counting the years since it's just been you and me and that long stretch of open road before us.
I used to hate that road. I don't know if you ever really knew how much. I hated it back then. That road took me away from the normalcy of college, that road almost took away your life when we were run down by that Semi on that godforsaken highway in Missouri; the road beat us down so many damn times, Dean.
But that road also saved me, in more ways than I can even count anymore. It keeps me grounded, keeps me humble –don't you feel that way too? Here it is, another Christmas night on the road with you. These last ten years haven't been easy on us. They hang on our faces and in the creak of our joints. I can see the months adding up in the faint little lines creasing out from your eyes and mine too.
I wouldn't change it though, Dean. I wouldn't change any of it for the whole goddamn world because it has all brought us here, to this moment; you in the driver's seat and me beside you with the snow flying toward the windshield like we're passing warp-speed through galaxies together –always together.
This is our tenth Christmas on the road, just us. Did you know that? It seems so long when I think back because we've been through so much, but really it has gone by so fast, in the blink of an eye. I'm selfish sometimes because I want you forever and I know the time we have together won't last that long.
"Ten Years Gone" by Zep comes on the radio and you start singing at the top of your lungs as we drive through the snowy dark. I don't know if you grasp the importance of that pure coincidence when these thoughts are on my mind. Who am I kidding? You probably know.
I smile and reach my hand across the bench seat and grab yours. You look at me with a grin as you twine your fingers with mine and you continue belting out the lyrics;
I'm never gonna leave you
I'm never gonna leave
Holding on, ten years gone. Ten years gone, holding on, ten years gone.
I sing along, just as loudly as you. We both know the words well. This music was a lullaby of ours, so how would we not know every single sentence?
Your hand grips mine tighter as the song fades out and we exchange a glance that speaks volumes. What's left unsaid, what we communicate silently, echoes just as poignantly down into my heart as if you'd spoken them aloud.
Yeah, you know. Just like I knew you would.