A/N: Thank you all soooo much for the wonderful reviews and encouragements over the last week. I hope to get back to each of you personally, but if I don't for a while just know I really appreciate it;D

And happy NCIS day US peeps!

Season 4 Christmas 2006

Tony woke up choking on what he could only assume was his own salvia. He couldn't breathe, his nose felt clogged, his eyes watered and he couldn't take a breath without feeling the rattle in his chest. He coughed, spitting up a tissue full of brown gunk before he felt the air enter his lungs in one hit causing yet another coughing fit. Spent, but breathing he fell back with very little grace.

How did he end up like this? He'd been so careful recently. Taking vitamin's, eating healthier, remembering to zip his coat up outside… working overtime for the director, living two life's, foregoing sleep completely... Oh. Looked like he hadn't been doing so good in regards to his health. Figures. Well his intentions had been good, surely that should count for something?

A hacking cough provided his answer. Apparently not. Air catching in his throat again initiated a coughing fit so bad it brought tears to his eyes. Looking around he groped for the clock on his nightstand. Only four o'clock. He'd taken himself back to bed at lunch time, having woken up feeling a little achy after spending last night out with Jeanne. Now only a couple hours later and he was struggling to breath. He knew what this meant. Hospital. He didn't want to go. They'd get the long pointy needles out and start jabbing him for tests, taking blood and inserting I.V's, then they'd want to start injecting things back into him, which meant more needles, more drugs to send him loopy. He didn't want any of that.

Another round of coughing had him sitting up, doubling over and choking within an inch of his life. This wasn't fair, not by a longshot. Just as he thought the worse was passing Tony felt the shaking on the inside becoming more obvious on the outside and he knew he had only seconds before he broke down completely. He couldn't do this, not again. It was all just too much.

He reached out and snatched up his mobile, pressing his speed dial unthinkingly.

"Boss," Tony choked out when the other end was picked up after only one ring.

He couldn't get any other words out, the air in his bedroom had turned to soup and all he could do was tighten his grip on the sweat dampened bed sheets while listening to the soothing voice on the other end of the line telling him to calm down and take small breaths. Seconds later his bedroom door opened and in walked the voice from the other end of the phone.

"What-" he gasped, "how'd - get here-" he managed in a rush, "-so fast?"

"I was just down stairs," Gibbs told him in the same soothing tone, pulling him fully up right to lean his head against his shoulder, rubbing his back to encourage the crap out that was clogging up his lungs in the first place.

Tony eventually coughed up what felt like half a lung, but was only a gooey mess the size of a marble in the offered tissue. Nevertheless he felt better for it.

"Huh?" He finally managed to respond, squinting up at Gibbs with a confused frown.

Gibbs sighed heavily, sitting down on the bed looking concerned he reached up over his head to flick on the light. Tony blinked a few times, adjusting to the sudden brightness, but it didn't take him long to realise this wasn't actual his bedroom.

"This is your house." He said, not sure what to think, "Boss?" He looked beseechingly at Gibbs.

"Yeah?" Gibbs asked when he didn't continue.

"How did I get here?"

.

24 hours earlier…

"Feels good to finish early doesn't it?" McGee leaned back in his chair.

"Don't jinx us McGoo," Tony slung his pack on his shoulder tiredly, "been a long week, gonna be a long weekend, have a good Christmas."

Gibbs walked in as he walked out.

"DiNozzo okay?" he queried surprised by his sudden exit, though there had been a lot of them lately.

"Long weekend apparently," McGee shrugged and said his goodnights too.

Gibbs nodded and wished him a merry Christmas. They were off rotation now until Wednesday. McGee was preparing to visit with his mom and step-father in Norfolk, Ziva had already left to spend the Christmas season on vacation somewhere hot given they hadn't had a break a long while, what with bombs on golf courses, dug up corpses, serial killer wives and killer Humvee's. They all needed a break and luckily the Director saw fit to give them one.

As for Tony he didn't know what his plans were, but Ziva's parting words to him the other day were giving Gibbs cause for concern. She'd mentioned how tired Tony had been looking lately, that he'd lost weight and she was worried about him. Just last week she'd been researching Y-Pestis relapses, which had given him plenty of sleepless nights. He didn't think Tony would hide anything like that from him, but then there was a nagging doubt in his mind that Tony would try and protect him. With him looking like he hadn't slept in a week and then spending every spare minute he had sleeping at his desk Gibbs couldn't deny something was wrong. Packing up his things he saw he had only one course of action that would put his mind at ease over the holidays.

.

"Boss what you doing here?" Tony looked surprised when he opened the door to his apartment.

"Checking that you're okay," Gibbs got straight to the point.

"Why would you think I wasn't?" Tony giggled nervously.

It was his tell. Whenever Tony lied to him, and it was just him mind, he'd let loose this nervous little giggle which made him sound like a bashful sorority girl. Letting him know that answer wasn't acceptable Gibbs scanned the apartment for evidence that something was wrong. Everything looked in place, just like it had the last time he'd been over and the time before that. In fact Tony's place always looked like it had never been touched. The only thing that ever moved was the fish.

"You seeing that girl of yours over Christmas?" Gibbs changed the subject, forcing a casually tone.

Tony looked panicked.

"How'd you?-"

Gibbs gave him a look, "Tony," he said with a knowing smile.

Looking embarrassed Tony answered honestly, which was a good choice, "Er, actually no she's working pretty solid."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, she's a… a doctor actually," he smiled, as if the notion of him dating a smart girl was ridiculous.

"A doctor?" Gibbs queried anyway, wondering if Tony was ready to share more.

Gibbs never asked about the one-nighters, or even those that lasted a date or two. In fact the only time he'd ever gotten involved with Tony's love life was when he broke up with his fiancé and when they crossed the line from ex to stalker.

"Yeah," he said shyly, head ducking, eyes focused anywhere but on him.

It was obvious he was embarrassed and normally Gibbs wouldn't press. If Tony had finally met someone who meant something to him he didn't want scare him into backing off, but on this occasion Gibbs needed clarification for a whole different reason.

"At university hospital?" He asked enquiringly, forming a theory now he had more information. Tony looked panicked again, telling him he was onto something... "Ziva told me you were getting calls from Uni Hospital, you told her it was test results!" He's angry now, angry and happy, but he can't show the latter as well.

"She was being nosey" he shrugged.

"She's worried about you!" Gibbs mentally adds 'knucklehead', "She thinks you're having a plague relapse!"

"Ha that's ridiculous." Tony choked on his own words under his glare and then looking scared added, "Uh sorry boss didn't mean to worry you too."

Gibbs kept up the glare, eyes narrowed.

"Can I offer you a drink?"

"These extra jobs for the Director? You're not stretching yourself too thin?"

Now he knew the hospital calls were from the girlfriend he felt free to address the whole sleeping at his desk issue.

"Kind of hard to step out now," Tony put up an invisible barrier between them, his tone suddenly cold, "You left, I had little choice."

The jibe hits him hard, reminding him of the responsibilities he shook off when he left for Mexico, but Gibbs doesn't let it show.

"You've been falling asleep at your desk a lot."

"Just tired boss," he shrugged again, again looking everywhere but at him.

"If you say so," Gibbs said carefully, measuring his own tone to match Tony's.

Somewhere they'd taken a misstep. Tony was closed off now, unwilling to even look at him. He'd thought they'd moved on and put what happened over summer behind them but it appeared there was still some bridge building to be done. Sensing now is not the time Gibbs walked to the door.

"Sure I can't offer you that drink?" Tony stopped him just as he reached for the handle, sounding sorry.

He obviously felt bad, but Gibbs knows he really shouldn't and he also knows he should get going.

"No, you need sleep, you look awful." Gibbs told him straight, "Get to bed."

It's an order and Tony takes it as one.

"Okay," He smiled warmly, taking it as the caring it's intended to be. "Night boss."

.

His phone is ringing and actually wakes him up. Checking the time, squinting at his watch, it's nearly 5am on Saturday. He isn't on call, so if this is Jenny he's going to tell her to stick it – they worked last Christmas.

"Gibbs," he barks.

"Is this Mr Gibbs?" A strange voice asks.

Gibbs frowned at the phone. "Yeah?"

"Anthony DiNozzo-"

"Where?" Gibbs cut her off.

"Sorry? I-"

"Where, which hospital?" Gibbs interrupted her - he already had his shoes on and was running out the door.

"Oh, Georgetown-"

"I'll be right there," Gibbs hung up, got in his car and drove off.

Walking into the busy hospital entrance Gibbs stormed up to the receptionist and gave them Tony's name. He's directed to a waiting area, where amongst the many walking wounded Tony is sat with a bandage on his head and tissue to his nose.

"What happened?" He groaned with relief, happy to see him conscious and without any life supporting machinery around him.

Tony looked pleased, but also a little sorry to see him there.

"After you left I popped out to fetch dinner, apparently I didn't make it."

Gibbs glared.

"I passed out, sorry boss."

Gibbs bit his lip to prevent the expletive from coming out, instead he settled for a growl and felt Tony's head for fever.

"I'm really am okay, it's just I came in an ambulance and don't know what happened to my wallet or anything."

"You mean you passed out on the street and were lucky somebody bothered to even call an ambulance!" He started off in a normal speaking tone, but somehow ended up yelling.

Tony took the telling off well, too well.

"What else?" He snapped.

"Nothing?" Tony looked hopeful he'd buy that, but gave up quickly and sounding defeated admitted "I might have a cold."

Might wasn't cutting it, he was burning up. Gibbs glared.

"Pneumonia, I might have pneumonia. But I don't have to stay," he hastened to add, "they gave me these medicines and all I need is bed rest."

Tony showed him the contents of a paper bag the hospital had given him. Gibbs stared at it a minute, before making his position clear.

"Come on," Gibbs pulled him up, "You're coming to stay with me."

Tony smiled at him dazedly, "You sure Colonel Mann won't mind?"

Gibbs stopped them half way between the waiting area and the exit, glaring at him until the got to be drug induced grin disappeared.

"None of my business boss." He agreed immediately and Gibbs can't help but laugh.

.

Present…

"So I'm delirious then?" Tony asked after being informed all that happened yesterday.

"Yep" Gibbs nods without hesitation, still sitting with him on the bed.

Taking that in Tony coughed again and again couldn't stop, his eyes watering. He grasped at Gibbs' shirt and tried to pull himself up, but his fingers felt numb and he couldn't get purchase. Panicked beyond all belief Tony thought he really would die this time, until strong arms took hold, pulling him up. He coughed some more, spitting up brown gunk, then like a miracle air entered his lungs, it felt wonderful until it instigated yet enough coughing fit.

This one lasted a good five minutes, but it did lessen and eventually cease. Spent, but breathing steady again, Tony fell back against Gibbs' chest with very little grace.

"I can't do this again." Tony whispered brokenly, resolutely keeping his eyes screwed shut.

"Yes you can." Tony felt Gibbs take hold of one lax hand and squeeze his palm. "I've never lied to you."

The conviction in those words was more than enough to break him. He was scared and exhausted from fighting for every breath. Tony turned his face into the shirt that smelt of the familiar sent of sawdust and old spice. If he had any defences left he'd question why the smell of his boss comforted him so much when he couldn't even remember what his own father smelt like. He wanted to blame it on sleep deprivation from so many late nights recently, but truth was his father was the bastard that never got close enough for Tony to draw comfort from, let alone get used to his scent.

Strange thing was he was currently lying to the one man who meant the world to him, the one person who would stand by him and, like he'd just proved, drive across town at five in the morning for him. This couldn't go on, Gibbs needed to know the truth about what the Director had him doing, had recently encouraged him to do. He was falling in deep. Jeanne was a mark not a girlfriend, but the lines where blurring, but if he told Gibbs he'd put an end to it, an end to Jeanne. He didn't want that. But he didn't want to keep lying either.

Tony tried to stay calm, but in the end he couldn't stop himself from laughing at the absurdity of his choices, because it was a laugh or cry moment and Tony would rather laugh every damn time. Gibbs squeezed him tighter, if that was even possible and Tony wondered if he'd misread his giggling as the onset of hysteria. But then he reminded himself this was Gibbs, and Gibbs saw everything… usually.

"Come on," he loosen his hold and offered a hand, "if you feel up to it Abby will be here soon,"

"Abby?" Tony questioned, getting himself under control.

"Yeah and Ducky's popping by later too."

Tony let Gibbs help him out of bed.

"Why?" He asked as together they hobbled towards the guest bedroom door.

"Well its Christmas eve Tony, they'd kind of like to see you." Gibbs grinned slyly.

DiNozzo couldn't believe he'd done it again, managed not to miss Christmas by the skin of his teeth. Since joining NCIS he'd been drugged up, kidnapped twice and stranded in Rock Creek Park, was any Christmas going to go smoothly for them? With Gibbs quitting and him having to take over a very hostile team it had been an emotional year and he guessed he was lucky any of them were together to celebrate this year to be honest. The job offer from Jenny was still hanging over his head, but it was moments like this, when his plague scarred lungs reminded him of past mistakes that he knew he'd made the right decision, no one but Gibbs was capable of looking after him in this sorry state. And besides, with all the shit they've been through these past five and a bit years what else could possible go wrong? He guessed he'd have to wait until next Christmas to find out…

.

A/N: shorter one this time, because I need a break from the epicness of last week lol, written in one day (today) so hope it's still a good one, cheers :D See you next Tuesday!