Who's the biggest douche of the universe? …The Chairman. And also Felix. Anyway, here's a new chapter.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

PS, only a certain person up in the note makes a bit of a cameo.

My eyes snapped open, feeling my chest burning. Quickly, I sat up and looked around. Was…was that a dream? I looked at the clock. It was 2 A.M.

I let out a sigh, and lie back down onto the bed. The burn in my chest didn't stop burning. It must've been a hell of a nightmare if I was spooked that bad… but the worse thing is…

I don't even remember the dream at all. No image, no faint recollection, anything. As if I had forgotten about the dream completely.

But despite that, I was terrified to go back to sleep. What if I had another horrible dream like that again?

…I didn't want to think about it. I just want to rest…

~o~

"Damn, what the hell happened to you?"

"Huh?" I mumbled, lifting my face from my arms.

Lav raised an eyebrow at me. "Did you get enough sleep last night?"

I sighed, before burying my face again. "Had a nightmare," I mumbled. "Scared the fuck out of me."

"Oh," Lav let out lamely.

"Worse part is, I don't remember what the dream is about," I added with a sigh. "But it still scared the shit out of me."

"Well, just make sure that it doesn't bother us in our sleep if you started screaming," Lav said before shrugging. "Sorry, a lot of us want some beauty sleep as well."

I sighed again. "I know. But there's no guarantee that it could happen."

At that moment, Church came in in his 'ghostly' form. "Man, I just had the weirdest dream," he said. "Sarge and Simmons are dead, then Simmons came back from the dead as a ghost but Donut killed him, revealing him as Caboose. Then Tucker and Doc appeared, and said that they're going to elope – Doc was even wearing a dress. Lopez was speaking French as well."

The two of us stared at him. "…What did you ate last night?" I asked him.

"I'm a ghost, remember?" Church deadpanned.

"Right, I know," I muttered.

"Why'd you ask him that?" Lav asked me.

"Well, sometimes what you eat can give you weird dreams," I explained. "My sister gets weird dreams when she eats something cheesy before she went to bed."

The dark skinned man raised an eyebrow at me. "…Okay…?"

"Anyways, get into your armor you guys," Church got our attention back to him. "We're heading out with Lopez."

Oh, right. To fix Shelia.

…Now that I thought about it, I haven't heard from Tex all day. I mean, she was there when Frank (or should I call him Doc?) appeared; well, in my head. I haven't heard from her all morning. But then again, she liked to disappear from my helmet from time to time. Probably to spy on O'Malley… or catch Lav doing the 'deed' around a rock.

Well, she'll come back soon, but in Lopez after Shelia is fixed. …I'll probably may have to ask Church what Mikey thought of me later…

~o~

"Wow," I let out after we looked over Shelia. The grenade did some bad damage to the tank. If Donut wasn't a part of a fake army, he could've been a football player, with that arm of his. I probably won't ask him to toss the football sometime later – to my luck, he'll probably throw it so far that I can't even keep up.

It took Lav and me a while to get into our armor, and even longer to wake up Mikey. Though, the two of us are admittedly terrified to wake him up. With Omega in his head, he could rip off our heads or something. Not a very pleasant thought. So we managed to get Church to do it, and spent half an hour giggling/laughing as Mikey attempted to glomp Church, always going through him. Afterwards, we got him ready to meet up with Lopez and then inspected Shelia.

"Man, this will suck," Lav sighed.

"Wait, why?" I asked.

I later found out that we all had to push the damn tank all the way back to our fucking base. Of course, I complained about it ("This is fucking bullshit!" Church: "Suck it up,") until we – reluctantly on my part – worked together to push it all the way back. After what seemed like forever, we managed to get it near our base.

I was nearly dead tired and the first to collapse, followed by Lav as the two of us panted like crazy. "Man you guys are wimps," Church let out.

Raising my head, I glared at him. "Fuck you Church," I growled. If there is a way to kill and AI- oh, wait, there is. The EMP.

The asshole AI ignored us and spoke to Lopez about an agreement. I blotted out the conversation to focus on the breathing exercises Tex taught me a while ago. It took a bit, but I was the first to sit up. "How are you up so quick?" Lav asked me, still panting.

I had to come up with a quick lie to cover my tracks. "I read about it."

Lav stared at me, still panting. "You read about it?"

I shrugged. "Well… most of it. It took me a while to get it right though. I could teach you if you want."

The man seems to have considered it. "…Yeah, why not?"

While Church and Lopez spoke to each other, I put Lav through the basics of the exercises that Tex taught me. It wasn't long until Lav seemed to have gotten the jest of it before I heard Church spoke up. "Alright, that's the deal, mister robot," he finished. "You fix our tank, we'll let you go free."

"I thought the plan was to trick him into fixing the tank and then Church will take over his body again when he is done," Mikey, uh… loudly whispered.

I looked back at the rookie as Lav deadpanned, "Yeah, but you don't tell the person you're tricking what's going on, Caboose."

"Wait, so if I'm the one being tricked, then you would not tell me what is really going on?!" Mikey let out, shocked.

"Uh… why on earth would we trick you?" I asked, confused. "I mean, I can't hide my intentions from people. I'm not good at being mean. Selfish, yes; being mean on purpose… not so much."

Lav looked over at me. "…Yeah, you don't seem to have a mean bone in your body," he admitted.

"We have mean bones?" Mikey asked, confused.

"It's…an analogy, Mikey," I tried to explain. "I just don't have it in me to be mean to everyone on purpose."

"Oh."

I looked back to watch Lopez as he worked on the tank. "…So how long do you think it'll take him to fix our tank?" I asked.

"Who knows?" Church shrugged. "It'll probably take him days, weeks, or even months-"

"En aproximadamente una hora," we looked over at Lopez when he was welding in something in the driver's part of the tank. The robot shrugged. "El daño no es demasiado grave realidad."

We stared at him in silence. I sighed. "Man, I feel bad for not understanding what he's saying…" I admitted, feeling bad for Lopez.

"He's a robot, I'm pretty sure he doesn't mind," Church said.

"Maybe but… imagine that for the whole time he existed, he didn't even have a voice. And when he does, the only language he can speak is Spanish! You felt elated that you can finally be heard and understood, but… that elation died away when you realize that you're not even understood! You'll probably spend an entire life trying to find ways to be understood, but people are either too ignorant or too stupid to comprehend-"

"Okay, shut up!" Church ordered me. "Why the hell do you go into these moments, huh?"

I paused a bit to think, before shrugging. "I have no idea," I admitted. "My mind is an enigma."

Church stared at me. "…You and Caboose are enigmas as far as I'm concerned."

"Hmm, good point," I conceded.

"… Ustedes son muy, muy raro," Lopez said.

"Hey! We're not weird!" Lav retorted…though I noticed he had the Spanish dictionary out.

"… Where did you get that?" I couldn't help but ask.

"I ran in a while ago to know what he's saying," Lav shrugged. He flipped through the pages a bit. "Okay, what'd he said earlier…?"

"I think it's… um… 'en aproxi…madmen…te… una hora'…?" I trailed off, uncertain. My pronunciation sucks.

"Okay…" We waited a beat for him to find it. And it seems like he did when he exclaimed: "Holy shit! An hour?!"

"What about it?" I wasn't the only one confused, but Church was the first to ask it.

"He said he'll be done in an hour!" Lav quickly explained.

…Did…did I hear that right? "…Seriously?" I asked, stunned.

"But that's fucking impossible!" Church exclaimed. "No robot is that fast!"

"Oh, he fixed the lid!" Mikey took that time to pipe up.

The three of us looked over to see that, yes, Lopez is done fixing up the canopy of the tank, before he moved on to fix up the cabin. …And during the whole time we spent talking, the tank looked…like it was brand spanking new!

We all stared. "…holy fucking shit, he's a really fast robot," I commented.

"Yeah…" Lav agreed.

I mean, I knew he was 'fast' with how quickly he build the underground holographic chamber under the Red Base at Valhalla, and various vehicles but… I always thought that was just an exaggeration! Are the machines just so complex that it's easy and fast for Lopez to fix and build them?

…On the other hand, he's the only one who's more intelligent than us – he just had to put up with the bullshit we went through. Specifically, the shenanigans the Reds go through.

It took a while, and we did a few things as we waited around. Lav and I played a bit of a word game (where you say a word and you had to come up with another word that starts with the last letter of that word), Church just looked impatient (though, seriously, how can you tell? His avatar has a helmet for crying out loud), and Mikey…well, he just bouncing in place eagerly.

"Ino."

"Operate."

"Excel."

"Libido." Goddammit Lav!

"Orion."

"Nickel."

"Lacerate."

"Ejaculation." Ugh!

"Nevermore."

"Equal."

"Lame."

"Execute."

"Exam."

"Masturbate."

"Dammit Lav! Why do we bother playing this if you kept doing that?!" I finally snapped. Seriously, most of the words he used are innuendoes or sexual things….and it didn't help that at some parts, I was blushing. Thank God for my helmet.

"Well, looks like I win," Lav said with a cheeky smile in his voice.

I grunted, unamused.

"Hey, can you guys not argue like a married couple for a few seconds?" Church deadpanned to us- wait, what?!

"We're not a married couple!" …My insistence came out more as a whine. I paused a bit before adding, "And we're not dating!"

"Right…" Church sounded unconvinced.

"Hurry, hurry, hurry, fix the tank!" Mikey exclaimed, sounding eager. "Fix the tank; so I can say hello to Sheila… And start killing everyone!"

…I'm still a bit unnerved by an O'Malley possessed Mikey.

"Uh… you mean all the Reds, right?" Lav asked nervously.

"Of course," Mikey nodded, before adding (O'Malley mode again), "For starters!"

Still creepy, I thought, shuddering. I looked around. Where the hell is Tex?

"Completo," Lopez suddenly called out. An engine started and I looked back to see him getting out of the tank to stand beside us as the tank powered up.

"Thank you for activating the M808V Main Battle Tank," Sheila spoke up. …Does she always say that whenever she's turned on?

"Sheila, you're fixed!" Mikey squealed happily before hugging her trends. "You're fixed!"

The AI tried to turn her cannon to look at him. "Hello, Private Caboose," she said pleasantly. "It is good to see you again. Thank you for repairing me."

"He didn't fix you, our robot did," Lav corrected.

"Don't cock-block me!" Mikey growled at him.

I raised my eyebrow. "…Where the hell can you even insert it?" I mumbled. "In the exhaust port?" Oh God, I don't think I'll get that disturbing image out of my head.

Thankfully, I was unheard. Though Shelia sounded surprised as she asked, "Robot? I wasn't aware that our squad was outfitted with a robot."

"Umm…" I trailed off, trying to find the right way to explain it to the AI in the tank. Thankfully though, she was distracted as she 'looked' over at Lopez, as the Spanish robot looked up at her as well. If this was an anime, the two of them could be staring at each other with their eyes glittering as they had fallen in love in first sight.

…That's actually romantic in a…strange kind of way.

"Hello there," Shelia said, sounding shy. "My name is Sheila, the M808V Main Battle Tank."

"Y yo soy Lopez la Pesado," Lopez replied with a graceful bow.

"Lopez… What a nice name for such a nice soldier," Shelia said happily. "You have such excellent motor skills."

"Bow-chicka-bow-wow," the words came out of my mouth before I could stop myself. Even Lopez and Sheila stared at me. I looked over at each of them, feeling my cheeks hot. "…What?"

Church shook his head at me. "This is sad, you know?"

"Shut up, Church," I growled.

"Ummm…" Mikey took the time to intervene. "Uh, well, Lopez has to go now, Sheila. He was just here to help me fix you, and now he as to go away!"

"Dude, this is getting weird," Lav said, a bit annoyed. "Church, will you take your fucking body back?"

"Right, got it," the AI nodded before he headed towards Lopez-

At the corner of my eye, I saw something else flashing towards Lopez, who could only exclaim, "NO!" before he was possessed again. But this time, he seems to be shaking…violently. If Lopez wasn't a robot, this would've been disturbing… but it is still disturbing, regardless of who it was.

"You okay in there, Church?" Lav called out, concerned. "Church! Hey, what's going on? Do I need to flip your switch?"

"Mikey broke that, remember?" I reminded him.

"Oh yeah."

Suddenly, Church came tumbling out of Lopez, landing flat on the ground. "What the…? That wasn't me! What the hell's going on here?"

Oh, so that's who it was. Tex you little sneak.

Just as I thought that, Lopez turned to us. "Well… Buenos Dias, cock-bites… Guess who is back?"

The guys stared at her in shock. "…Tex?" Lav exclaimed in shock.

"Who else?" The female AI deadpanned.

Church suddenly leapt to his feet and stomped up to the possessed robot. "Get out of my body right now, Tex!"

"Your body?" Tex parroted. "This isn't your body, I stole it!"

"Yeah, but I stole it first!" Church snapped back.

"I am confused," Sheila took that moment to speak up. "I thought your name was Lopez, and I thought you were a man. This is all so strange. I feel like my circuits are crossed… and I like it!"

"…Huh?" I let out, confused.

"I know how to get her out of there!" Mikey suddenly growled, pulling out his pistol and pointing at Tex's helmet. "…Wink!"

"Caboose, don't!" Church quickly intervened before it got too messy. "Look, just go explain to Sheila, okay?"

Mikey lowered his gun a bit before he shook his head a bit (like he was snapping himself out of it or something) before nodding. After Mikey climbed onto Sheila, Church directed his attention at Tex. "Alright, Tex. Now what's it gonna take to get you outta there?"

"Well, ever since I've been a ghost-" man she's a hell of a liar. But, frankly, I don't blame her "-I've been watching you guys a lot."

"Whoa," Lav suddenly interrupted nervously. "When you say you've been watching us does that mean you've been watching us all the time?"

…I didn't bother to look over at his 'private rock', feeling my face flush again. "Like, even when we're alone?"

"Yes, Tucker," Tex scolded him. "And you should be very ashamed of yourself."

"H-Hey! The only chick we have here won't even have sex with me!" Lav defended himself. "And besides, it gets very lonely out here! Can you blame me?"

"Leave me out of this!" I exclaimed.

"Anyway, I've noticed a change in one of your guys," Tex continued before jabbing her thumb at the blue soldier on top of Sheila. "Caboose."

"A change? Like what? He's finally learned the whole alphabet?" Church asked.

Since Tex saw what was in my head, she made a gesture that she was rolling her eyes. "No, as in he's becoming increasingly aggressive lately."

"Fuck yes, I have!" Lav piped up. "It started about the same time Sheila got disabled and you got blown up. I tried to tell Church, but he never listens."

"Tucker, there's a very fine line between not listening and not caring," Church deadpanned. "I like to think that I walk that line every day of my life." What life?

I already heard the explanation before, so I tuned it out as I looked out to the canyon. Well, it's almost nearing the events of the O'Malley situation, with him possessing Doc later- uh oh.

This is, oh shit, what should I do? Should I let things run their course, or try to change it? Omega won't find another host in a while and will probably remain dormant or something.

…On the other hand, there's gotta be a reason for the Reds and Blues to team up temporarily. True that they needed to stop O'Malley…but the Reds are mostly in it to retrieve Lopez with orders from Freelancer Command – a really shitty one at that.

I spent too much time training that I never even thought of this. Dammit I'm up shit creek now…

"Hey!"

"Huh?" I yelped out, turning to Church.

"C'mon, we gotta do some planning," Church told me.

Planning?

It soon dawned on me. "Oh! Okay," I nodded. "But, uh, what about Mr. Happy?" I looked over at Mikey as I asked that.

"I just told him to keep an eye out for trouble," Church told me. "Though, would you rather stay out here to watch him? I don't think you'll listen to our plan."

I kind of already knew what's going to happen, so after I thought about it, I nodded. "Okay. I'll keep an eye on him."

"Okay, just… try not to get killed or anything." Church then headed back into the base, where Tex and Lav are most likely at by now.

I let out a sigh as I looked over at Mikey. "…This is gonna be a long day," I muttered.

"Don't even think about wondering off again!" Church called out.

"Okay! I won't wonder around!" I shouted back, before I rolled my eyes. "Geez… what is he, my dad?"

"I heard that!"

"Get to fucking Tex you douche!" I shouted. I grumbled under my breath as I headed out to be near Mikey. I tried to get myself calm with deep breathes before I got next to him. "Hey Mikey," I said, as pleasantly as I could.

"Huh? Oh, hey Erica," Mikey greeted me, seemingly oblivious to me and Church shouting at each other a bit ago. "What'cha doing?"

"Well, I figured that I could help you out in keeping an eye out for trouble," I lied. Don't want O'Malley to suspect something.

"Oh, okay," Mikey nodded before the two of us looked around. It was a bit later when he suddenly asked Shelia:

"Oh, um, Shelia? Can you go a bit further to patrol?" I blinked at his wording. What…what is he up to?

"Certainly," Sheila used her cannon to nod before she drove off a bit further.

As she does, I suddenly felt apprehensive. But…why? "Uh…"

"Well…now we're both alone," Mikey said with a… pretty creepy tone before he turned to me.

"M-Mikey?" I began to back up as he headed towards me. "Wh-What are you doing?"

"Oh, its fine, it's fine," Mikey said with a pleasant tone. "I just want to talk with my friend. We haven't spoken like this in a while, huh?"

"Uh… I-I guess," I stuttered- before my back was against something. I looked back to see that it was one of the rocks scattered in front of the base. I hope it isn't Lav's private rock-

I felt something gripping my neck and I was pressed harshly to the rock. I gasped as I was suddenly deprived of oxygen- and my heart seemed to freeze when I heard a dark chuckle. "Now I've got you," they said. "Right where I want you."

I mentally cursed. Shit- Omega! "Y-You're Tex's AI!" I gasped out.

"Well, seems like you were paying attention after all," O'Malley said mockingly. This is- Oh, holy shit, O'Malley's got me! "How quaint."

"L-Let me go!" I gasped out, struggling against his grip, but it's like iron!

"No," the AI tightened his grip a bit. "You've been dodging me for three months. Now that I have you, I will enjoy getting information out of you."

"I-Information? What information?" I choked out.

"Don't play dumb," Omega said sternly. "That was the sole reason why I and Tex are here: to learn about who you are and why you are here."

"I…I don't know! I don't know WHY I'm here!" I insisted.

"Wrong choice of words," Omega sneered before he squeezed harder – he could've broken my neck if he wanted!

I tried to pry his hand loose from my neck, but in my panic, I couldn't do anything. I faintly heard a sinister chuckle as everything began to go dark for me.

Wow… death by an AI possessing someone. What a way to go-

"O'Malley, stop!" Church-?

I heard a growl before I was slammed onto the rock. My head was hit in the right way, and gradually, I lost awareness.

Before I blacked out completely, I heard Omega scream, "NOOOOO!"

~o~

I stared down impassibly at the man in the white armor. He looked to be gasping for breath, as his blood leaked from knife wounds. He looked to be normal, as any military can be… but the symbol on his shoulder proved otherwise. Shakily, he reached his hand out to me. "H-Help me…!" He gasped out.

I tilted my head. Why should I? I don't know him. Isn't the project he was working for our enemy?

Footsteps came up beside me. "Well, I thought a few hits would kill him," he said. I glanced over at him, his black and orange armor nearly cleaned of blood. Nearly. "Sturdy bastard."

"What should we do?" I asked, my tone blank.

The man made a thoughtful look. "Well, we can't leave witnesses, can we?"

I shook my head. "No. No we can't."

The black and orange armored man crossed his arms. "Well then, want to do the honors?"

I looked back at the man lying before me. "Are you sure?" I asked.

"Oh yeah, I'm sure," he answered.

I nodded. "All right then." I pulled out my pistol and aimed it at the man's head. His eyes widened, as if horrified. I didn't feel anything from the expression.

I didn't even flinch as I shot the man, his blood and brain bits landing on my armor. I lowered my gun.

"So? How do you feel?" The man asked me.

I stared down at the man I had just killed. Should I…feel anything at all? I'm not sure… Oddly enough, my chest was burning the entire time, but I paid little mind to it.

"…I don't feel anything," I answered after a moment.

"Good," another voice spoke up, and we looked over to the man in black and green armor. "That is what a soldier should be about. We all have our orders… and you followed them well."

I somewhat blushed at the praise. "Well, never thought I heard Locus praising someone," the other man commented.

"You would probably follow her example, Felix," Locus told him.

"Oh shut up," Felix huffed as I stared down at the dead man-

I shot up. I panted heavily to calm my racing heart. Whenever something scares me – like a nightmare or something like that – it's like my chest is on fire. It spooked the hell out of me for sure. Unlike this morning, though, I could remember my dream now.

…And it fucking spooked me. Locus and Felix? What are those two doing together? I thought they were enemies…aren't they? And that soldier… he's from Project Freelancer, and yet not all of them are in it too deep like the top agents. And yet… I killed him in cold blood.

What…what sort of monster am I? I-!

I felt something coming and I covered my mouth. I looked around quickly before finding a trash can. I hurried over and I lost it.

After I cleared the contents of my stomach out, I sat back down and curled into myself. It…it's all so wrong! I know that we can't help but kill, but… it's either kill or be killed. Survival of the fittest and all…

…But what point is there to just kill for the sake of killing?! It's not fun; it's not pleasurable; it- it's horrible! Horrifically horrible! What kind of monster does that?

What right do they have in judging in who lives and who dies?! We don't play 'god'! It just-! God. God.

Why?!

Oh god, I was never this scared in my life...

(Spanish translations)

'En aproximadamente una hora.' – 'In about one hour.'

'El daño no es demasiado grave realidad.' – 'The damage is not too serious actually.'

'…Ustedes son muy, muy raro.' – '…You guys are really, really weird.'

Well… that was a bit dark. Nearly killed by O'Malley, and then had a dream that she was a cold blooded killer. Not a pleasant thing.

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