As we reached the others, loud angry argument attracted our attention. I could see that something was wrong and noticed that Kili and Bilbo was missing and Fili caught up to his uncle.
"Finally you're here!" Fili said with a worried expression. We looked at him with alike questioning eyes.
"Fili..what'.." Thorin started but his nephew cut in abruptly.
"Trolls got Kili and Bilbo!" He stated. No more words needed to be said when Thorin reached for his sword and looked at his companions with determined eyes. All of them nod in union as they know what they must do now that their king is here and took their leave towards the trolls, while I gathered the bow Thorin landed me to help them. I felt a presence behind me as I turned and smashed into a hard chest.
"And what do you think you're doing?" The king growled at me. I was a bit shocked to see his emotionless face after our private time together. I rolled my eyes tried to ignore his tone and got next to him but once again he got in my way.
"Honestly, what does it look like?" I asked, and he grabbed me by my shoulders and backed me into a tree.
"No!... You stay here!" He demanded.
"My godsons are out there... fighting. Did you just think that I left them alone trusting in Mahal's grace?" I shouted angrily.
"No. I know you too well and as for this I must do the right thing." He said in a calmer voice and grabbed some rope to tie me to the tree. I was speechless for his actions and my blood started to boil again.
"You can't just left me here!" I cried out desperately.
"Really?...Just wait and see!" He said with a hint of sarcasm as he turned to get after the others.
"Thorin!" I pleaded, whereupon he looked back at me with a sigh.
"I can not fight properly if a have to worry about your safety." He said with imploring eyes. I gasped at his statement and watched as the once love of my life rushed after his companions.
"FUCKING GREAT!" I shouted and tried to loosen my ties with my hands. It appeared to be useless as the ropes cut into my skin deeply and blood begun to drip from the open wounds."Dammit!" I cried out in pain. I lifted my gaze to search for any sing of the others but not even the wind fluttered around me. I had a very bad feeling about the dwarves, so I tried find something which can be used in the salvation process, but it was hopeless. I almost gave up all efforts about my escape, when I heard a familiar whisper in my mind, which got more and more louder.
"Nimril!" It echoed. My mouth fall open at the realization, when I recognized the voice in my head.
"Gandalf?"
"He needs you! Why do you delay?" He asked. I frowned and couldn't believed my own ears.
"Well certainly because I have my boundaries." I started in a teasing tone. "But you may not see yourself cause you're not even here."
"I'm on my way, but I fear to be late...but as for you...you're within reach, so I ask again: Why do you delay?" I was furious after his question.
"As I have mentioned : I'M TIED TO THIS BLOODY TREE!" I snarled, when I heard a disappointed sigh in my head from Gandalf.
"Perhaps, the boundaries just in you're head..." He stated. " Nimril, I must tell you something, but before that you must be the person who you once used to be. Gathered you're strength and free your mind, and your body. You have so much more in you then you have imagined." I stared before me with wide eyes and tried to digest these informations. "Remember when I came back to you, you told me that it was a dream nothing more. And now here you are amongst friends, with your loved ones once more. You are in Middle-Earth where everything is possible." He was right. I was confused where to belong first, but I know, as long as I'm here I want to help them.
"But Gandalf! I don't know how to get rid off these ropes." I whimpered.
"Close your eyes my dear!" He asked and I obeyed. "Feel the power you felt when you dueled with Thorin!" I tried to focus on my feeling back then and concentrated on tearing my ropes. I thought back on the day I met wit Thorin, on the feeling I had for him and then on the day I was banished from Erebor. All the sad memories flashed back before me and I started to weep silently, my hands shaking violently but slowly I felt the ties loosened around my wrists at the same time.
"That's my Blossom!" I heard Gandalf approving words but I couldn't deal with how did it happen just grabbed my weapons and sprinted forward. " Try to gain some time for me." The wizard ordered.
"And how am I supposed to do that?" I thought back.
" With some light. They are trolls after all." He said mockingly and with that his voice was gone. I ran as fast as I could before I see the lights of a campfire, but only after I stepped a few meters closer was I able to hear voices.
"Uh, I meant with the, uh, with, uh, with the seasoning."
"What about the seasoning?"
"Well have you smelt them? You're going to need something stronger than sage before you plate this lot up." The dwarves yelled at Bilbo,and called him a traitor while I sneaked closer to count them and was relieved to hear all their voices. And now what, I thought to myself and remembered Gandalf's last words: with some light. I looked around and noticed, how Bilbo was talking to the trolls and that the others were in their lower safe, except for those who were tied above the fire. I tried to get closer to a nearby rock for shelter without being noticed when I just stepped on a twig with a louder crack. I worriedly peeked around if I was discovered by the sound, when my eyes fell on disbelieving steel blue ones. Thorin stared at me with disapproving eyes and enunciated silently the word run to me. I shook my head angrily and hid behind the rock. And now what, I thought to myself and remembered Gandalf's last words: with some light. Was he just kidding? I wasn't ready for all of this. I gathered my basic knowledge about trolls: huge, ugly, dumb ass creatures scared of sunlight.
"SUNLIGHT!" I screamed silently. Of course, they turn into stones by sunlight, that's why Bilbo struggles to keep them entertained. But the sunrise was still in an hour away. I thought, when the realization hit me. Whatever power helped me in the duals, and helped me to get free from the ropes, could help me to make the sun rise up sooner. But it's just ridiculous, I'm no magician. I laughed hopelessly and so I just stretched out my right arm towards the sky just like in Star Wars films.
"Luke,I am your father!" I whispered with disbelief, and mimicked Darth Veder's voice to relieve the stress with some fun and giggled. Why am I doing this shit? Honestly, I didn't know, but still holding my arm outstretched and concentrated on the sun. I closed my eyes as I imagined how the sun rays, and how they would hurt my eyes, imagined the warm light on my face. Slowly with this realistic imagination before my eyes I opened them, and saw my old friend hurriedly climbing on the opposite rock, where I can certainly saw more light then seconds ago. Was it my mind's doing? Gandalf looked at me expectantly then he straightened himself on the top and lifted his wand up.
"The dawn will take you all!" He exclaimed striked the rock with his staff, splitting it in half, and allowed the sunlight behind it to pour into the clearing. When the sunlight touched the trolls' skin, slowly they begun turning into stone amidst with loud screams and howls of pain. Within seconds, there were three stone statues of trolls in the clearing. All the dwarves cheered for Gandalf, only, the dwarves on the spit, including Dwalin, looked uncomfortable. I came out of my hiding to join Gandalf. He looked me with fatherly pride, and patted my shoulder, while my eyes searched the steel blue gaze of our leader, who did just the same. Hurriedly the wizard started to free the dwarfs on the spit and I decided to help the others in the sacks. I stepped closer to the dwarf king with one of my half smiles our eyes still intertwined and I kneeled before him as my smile turned into a full grin. I almost felt like a predator cornering its prey. I ran my eyes through over his body in this state, enjoying the scene with triumph in my soul, and noticed how the others waited something to happen between us.
"Nice sack!" Finally I mocked with a wink, but before Thorin could respond to my words, knowing that I won't have any better chance, I slapped him hard on his face. My rage over his earlier actions made my hit so hard, that his head sunken to its side. All the others low murmurs and louder cheers went silent as they stared at us. I crawled closer to Thorin and cut the neck of his sack and left him quickly, right before he could grab my left arm. He didn't dare rush after me in his undressed state, but still I could feel his sharp eyes on my back as I helped Gandalf with the others. My old friend looked at my face then he turned back to look at Thorin's before he managed to say.
"Was it necessary?" I just shrugged.
"No! But I owed him one." I teased and helped Bofur to stand up and tossed him his clothes. I curiously peeked over my shoulder to see if Thorin was still angry after our interaction, but my sight was blocked by my two godson's mischievous grin. I smiled a relieved smile back at them, when I noticed their grin got bigger.
"What?" I asked cautiously.
"Nothing." Kili said with a hidden laugh and hugged me. Fili just patted my arm, when I heard their uncle's voice closer than I wanted. I turned my head in search of his whereabouts just to find out he was right behind me.
"Where did you go to, if I may ask?" He asked Gandalf right behind my back with his eyes fixed on us. Instinctively, Fili and Kili lowered their gazes and left my side while I stepped away to gain some space.
"To look ahead." The wizard stated stepping next to me.
"What brought you back?" Thorin asked and looked between us with suspicion.
"Looking behind. Nasty business. Still, they are all in one piece." Was Gandalf's respond.
"No thanks to your burglar." The king spat and his eyes turned away in search of the hobbit.
"He had the nous to play for time. None of the rest of you thought of that." I said in a much calmer tone than I felt myself at the moment. Thorin's blue eyes snapped back on my face after my words and closed the space between us with one huge step.
"And you!" He growled. I could tell by his features and by how his body quivering with rage that he had no idea what to say or even do to me. We stared in silence into the others eyes and slowly as he noticed his old playmate, his furry was gone and gave its place to dispbelief and astonishment. He lifted his right palm maybe to reach out for me, but stopped abruptly in mid air, as he couldn't believe for his own eyes.
"Mimur!" He whispered but not as quietly for the others watching us nearby not to hear. After hearing my nickname the other's low murmurs and gasps filled the air. Gandalf walked to one of the troll statues and thumped it with his staff, with a pleased smile on his face.
"They must have come down from the Ettenmoors." He stated catching our attention once more. Very slowly Thorin tore his gaze off my face and joined the wizard, while Bilbo sneaked next to me.
"What's mimur?" He asked curiously. My eyes lingered on Thorin as he approached to the three troll statues discussing things with Gandalf.
"Its not it!" I started. " It's her!...And it's me!" I corrected him giving credit for my statement by turning to look at him. "It means : tiny in khuzdul."
"Oh..! So..ahm.. you knew each other before." He said and I gave him a slight smile and nod.
"You know Master Baggins we are alike in some ways!" I teased him and reached for his right shoulder as we walked towards the others gathering around or leader. He looked at me with open confusion. "We both gave up our warm home and well known lives in search of an adventure." I patted his shoulder as we both gave a big sigh.
"Well maybe something's waiting for us. Maybe something greater than pipe smoke, daily warm meals and a comfortable arm chair. Right?" He asked and looked up at me with determined features but still I could find concern in his eyes.
"Indeed." Was all I could say before we reached the company.
"They could not have moved in daylight." Gandalf said looking at Thorin meaningfully.
"There must be a cave nearby." The dwarf leader stated and motion to the others to gather their belongings and search for the cave. Thorin waited for the others to depart first and when we were left alone he grabbed me by my arm and turned me to face him.
"Not you Trisha!" He said as his eyes bore into mine. I gulped nervously as his face came closer and tried to focus on our surroundings and not on his lips again.
"How?" He demanded, but I was too nervous and too slow in answer for his liking. He stared at me silently and searched my features. I lowered my gaze and for the first time during my time back here in Middle-Earth, I was speechless before him. I noticed how his hands clenched into fists like he tried to hold back himself from doing something incredible stupid. He took a deep breath and went after the others. I stood there vulnerable with my surfacing memories and feelings, alone. I haven't even noticed the warm stream of tears dripping from my chin until Gandalf looked after where I delay and approached me with his outstretched hands to dry my tears.
"Come my dear! We must go after them. I sense something in the air what troubles me." I gave a silent nod and walked after the company as a ghost. I felt less strong after his recognition. I thought that it would be liberating if he knows the truth. That I could be once me, after all these years, that we could speak our mind freely over the events of our mutual past, but that feeling never came. I felt miserable, so tired and sad, even mad but mostly numb even without my drugs I used to take to gain some peace for my troubled thoughts, and broken heart. In this state I felt useless for this quest, and once again I wanted to curl up into a ball next to my well known room, back in the hospital and wait for the darkness to liberate me from my past. I didn't have the opportunity to think through what would happen if Thorin finds out who I am, but after that happened, I just couldn't beer the thought of him being in arms reach, with my formerly rejected feelings, and without the comfort of my fiancé. It simply would not do. I felt Gandalf squeezing my hand for support as we reached the troll hoard. Most of the dwarves were inside exploring the cave, but after I felt the stench coming from inside I changed my mind and stayed outside on the fresh air. I stood there almost for half an hour when I saw Gloin and Bofur emerge from the cave with a chest and two shovels. I stepped closer with curiosity and watched how they buried their treasure in the ground. Ever so slowly all the members of the company came out of the cave with Thorin holding a new sword with interest in his hand. I stayed behind with Bilbo, to avoid the stench, when the wizard exited the cave and headed over to where we were sitting. He handed Bilbo the sword he just found in the cave. I could tell by the look on his features that our little fellow didn't quite understand why Gandalf gave him a sword.
"I can't take this." He said with fear in his voice.
"The blade is of Elvish make which means it will glow blue when orcs or goblins are nearby." Gandalf said, as he haven't heard what he just said.
"I have never used a sword in my life." Bilbo protested, but I patted his hand and gave him a smile to encourage him to take the weapon.
"And I hope you never have to. But if you do, remember this: true courage is about knowing not when to take a life, but when to spare one." I heard Gandalf finished, but faraway sounds caught my interest. I slowly stood up and walked forward into the woods. I haven't noticed when did Thorin joined me.
"What is it?" He asked.
"I don't know." I whispered. "But I don't like it!" I looked him in the eye with worry. He gave me an understanding nod and went ahead in search of the strange voice. I was about to follow him when suddenly he was by my side, grabbed me by my arm and rushed back to the others while he drawn me behind him.
"Something's coming!" He announced.
"Stay together! Hurry now. Arm yourselves." Was Gandalf's reply.
"Here!" I heard Fili's voice behind me, and landed one of his dual swords to protect myself. "Take it!"
"But Fili!" I started to protest. He got impatient and forced my right hand to grab the handle of his weapon.
"You don't have your own weapons, right?" I just nodded. "Then use this till we get you one! I can not bear the thought you being unprotected!" He said with a sad expression in his eyes.
"Damn! You are related to your uncle aren't you!" I teased with a hint of smile on my face. I patted him on the shoulder and turned my full attention back to the approaching sound, but haven't missed Thorin's eyes on us.