Did I swim ashore or did the current push me? I didn't know. I had no comprehension at all of how long I had spent in the water before becoming aware that half of my body was now lying in the mud.

It didn't feel as if the mud pulled me down but rather something else pushed me from behind. I had no strength to stand or even to crawl, pulling myself across the dirt, slithering, like a worm. Not a snake; snakes were dangerous. I was harmless… helpless.

I dragged myself away from the water and up against a tree, resting my right shoulder and head against it, resting until some measure of strength came back to me. At home I had often slept on one arm, waking up to it completely numb. My whole body felt that way now. It was comforting. Nothing hurt. I had a powerful urge to sleep, and it called to me. Go to sleep it said and let go. Just let it all go.

I fought it and slipped free of my pack and the weight fell away and gave me an immediate rush of energy. It took longer, much longer to wrestle free of my jacket. The feeling of cold changed, the air hitting my exposed skin rather than the soaked material of my sleeve.

Regardless of the danger, I needed to make a fire. If I didn't get warm and dry, I was going to die anyway. If my fire did draw attention, perhaps it was better to die to a swift knife thrust than from cold and exposure.

The matches were waterproof, something I hadn't appreciated when I first gotten them back at the start. I could start a fire then.

With the weight of my pack gone I was able to stand though they were baby steps and I continually flailed to keep myself upright. I couldn't gather much… but anything was better.

It took maybe half an hour and seven matches to get a blaze going and though my eyes streamed from the smoke as my kindling leaves frizzled, it was hot smoke and dried my hair out and made a bit of a change to my clothes. I fed the fire, feeding in sticks and leaves and wondering where the others were. Perhaps they were as messed up by the flood as I was.

The arena was smaller now, much smaller. I didn't know how much smaller but I had a feeling that none of us would feel like there was the safety of space again.

Perhaps the flood had broken up the Careers. I couldn't imagine them staying together any longer. Perhaps they had taken their chances during the flooding and I had missed the cannon blasts as I had been swept along. I wasn't sure of how much time had passed. Perhaps I had been lying in the shallows for a day or two… I had no way of knowing.

It didn't matter. Losing track of the days didn't mean anything. I didn't even have a weapon now. If someone came along now, I could put up a thirty second fight… maybe… before becoming completely exhausted. That was it. Perhaps I could find a big stick…

My biscuits were spongy but still perfectly edible. My dried meat was ten times chewier than before. But still edible. Gnawing on it was tiring but I wasn't going anywhere. I chewed my food and kept adding dribs and drabs to the flames.

I pulled off my shirt finally and twisted and squeezed the water out and then put it back on before doing the same to my jacket. I had a vision in my head of gathering some larger branches and crafting a drying rack. I didn't have the energy though. All I could do was take off my shoes, wring out my socks and twist my soles to the flames until they dried out and began to feel scorched.

The heat woke up my body slowly and I missed the numbness because I had been battered by the water and I felt it all as the feeling came back.

What did I look like now to the watching audience? Had they watched, hearts in mouths, as I had tumbled along in the water? Were they wondering where the boy who had been addressing the sky was now? I didn't know. Sitting quietly and listening to the crackle of my fire, watching it eat twig after twig… I didn't feel like telling the world what I was thinking. I wasn't thinking anything. Except maybe, now would be a good time to die. I was tired… Somewhat comfortable… If I could have just slipped away right now, that would have been ideal.

I did my best to dry my sleeping bag but I would have needed a bonfire to do that. I didn't have the energy. Failure of will…

It cut into my senses slowly. The sound of rustling; feet trailing through the undergrowth. I looked around wearily and it seemed my wish was coming true. F1 was trudging along, cradling her left arm and limping. She saw me.

Ray had an oval face, pointed at the chin. Brown hair, brown eyes… She was good-looking but not in a striking way. At the interviews certainly but after two weeks in the arena she looked natural. The way we were supposed to look. We gazed steadily at each other and I shook my head. I didn't have a clue what I was trying to convey with this. 'Don't kill me'?, 'Just do it'? maybe even 'What's the point?'?

She approached slowly and I saw her arm had been slashed. I couldn't see the reason for her limp but that didn't mean anything. She came at me slowly, with no visible weapons. Perhaps she was going to beat me to death with her good right arm. She stooped and picked up a branch. Beaten to death then… That was a way to go… A way to go.

Ray sat, facing me across the fire and continuing to stare. Now she was close, I could see she was exhausted. Maybe even as much as me. She was also pale. She had lost a lot of blood. She was too tired to fight and the fire… she leaned into it. Her arm wasn't bleeding anymore but it was obviously hurting her. She had no weapons, no pack, nothing. Clearly the Career pack had broken up and she had lost everything. Perhaps Renown was the one who had hurt her. I liked to think so. It made me feel a bond toward her, even if there might have been nothing to feel.

She broke up her branch and placed it on the fire. Had she ever picked it up with the thought of killing me or had this always been her intention?

"What are you doing, Ray?" I used her name deliberately.

"I'm cold." She said, blinking as smoke curled at her eyes.

"And then what?"

"I'm cold." She repeated.

I could see that she wasn't thinking that far ahead. Like me, she was too weary and beaten up. She was a Career but she had reached this point too. It didn't look like she had been in the water but I guessed she had taken a beating and there was probably a lot of bruising hidden under her clothes.

"You were in the water." It wasn't a question.

"All night."

"You're alive."
"Just."

She stood and I watched as she gathered more wood, lots more, more than I could have managed. I felt eerily calm as I watched her. If she decided to kill me, I couldn't stop her, so why worry? As all she was doing now was making a bigger fire and helping me, even though she was only really helping herself. Two of us sat by a big fire were vulnerable but… she seemed to care as little about that as I had.

"You got any food?"
"Seriously?"
"I could kill you, and take it." She almost smiled. It wasn't entirely an empty threat but she didn't have anything to kill me with. There wasn't even a big rock lying around. None of the wood she had gathered made a decent weapon.

I took a strip of dried meat from my pack and reached across the fire. Ray snatched my arm tightly and fixed me with a hard gaze. She sized me up and I saw myself through her eyes. She didn't know about anything I had done and didn't seem to suspect it either. All she saw was a damp, weak millboy without the strength to pull back. She didn't need to try and kill me, yet.

She released my arm and took the meat in one fluid movement. I still felt calm. As it turned out at this point, the inevitability of death wasn't frightening. I would have thought that waiting for it to come at any moment should have been terrifying. But it wasn't. The water had leeched more than the warmth out of me, it had taken all my cares away.

"What happened to you?"

Ray regarded me stonily for a full minute and I could see the Career contempt for me. "We were asleep and then we heard the water. We didn't know what it was at first but we decided something making that noise couldn't be good, so we ran. Renown decided that was the time to break the alliance. He killed Fiona for sure and then he tried to kill me." She lifted her arm. "He didn't get me though. Asshole."
"He's from your District."

"Yeah; that's how I know."

"You killed the girl from my District."

"Did I?" It was a response of both weariness and indifference.

"You broke her legs first."

Kayla hadn't been lying. The look on Ray's face made that clear. "I didn't do that."

"No?"
"Alba caught her. Renown wanted to know if she was the one who torched our supplies. She didn't say anything because she was too scared. And he got angry so he broke her leg… and she was too busy screaming to answer any questions, so he broke her other leg. I guess it hurt too much then and she was able to talk. She told him 'no'. She hadn't torched our stuff. He thanked her, shook her hand and broke her arm." She shook her head. "Sick asshole. We were trained to kill quick, efficiently, effectively. But Renown, he liked to hurt people. I never trained with him until we reached the Capitol but I heard stories. My mentor told me to kill him the moment I got the chance."

"And you cut June's throat." It wasn't an accusation but she took it as one.
"I wasn't going to leave her lying there!" Ray snapped ferociously. "She'd have taken days to die, in unimaginable pain. That's no way for anyone to die."
"I didn't know Careers had consciences."
"You want me to kill you?"

"With what?" I asked pointedly. "And we wouldn't be talking if you had the strength."

She nodded, acknowledged that was the only reason I was alive. "Yeah, I killed your girl from your District. Want revenge?"

"No. You gave her mercy. I want Renown."

"Get in line." She said. "You're not afraid of me, are you?"

"Too tired, Ray. Too tired. I'm cold." I echoed what she had said deliberately. "You're hurt and you don't have any weapons, so you won't take your chances. Not yet. Maybe later… when I can't keep my eyes open any longer. Maybe you'll wrap your arm around my throat and strangle me."

"Maybe I'll walk away." She said. "Maybe I'll let someone else get you."

"No. You're wondering what's in my pack. I think you know I don't have any weapons. But you think I have a lot of food and you need that. And the sleeping bag, if it dries out."
"You're smart."
"I just try to imagine how you people think."

"Well… if we've got any surprises for each other, I don't think we're in much shape to do anything about it."

"So what do we do?" I asked.

"Why don't we just… wait here for a little while… see what happens?"