Poco Chapter 4 (Poco finds her feelings deeper than she wanted. Does Optimus?)
Monique some how gets back into town. It's no help that it is raining cold chilling rain here, too. She finds a taxi to get her home. Luckily the taxi driver accepts the foreign money she had. He saw how tired and distraught she looked. She gave him her best warm smile and climbed the cold wet stairs to her apartment. Using the hide a key, she was in no mood to look through the torn up jumbled carryall. She was lucky enough to find her passport in that mess. She was terrified that she had dropped it inside…Optimus.
"God help me. I'm so messed up right now. Please, dear God let me wake up from this crazy dream." She silently prayed as she entered her stuffy apartment.
She looked at her blinking answering machine. Lots of messages. To the point it had run out of room. Weary, she started to listen to them.
She's been fired from her bookstore job. She did take off for three weeks without notice to her boss. Great. She gets a 60 day notice to pay rent or evict. Great. She gets notice that if she doesn't get those papers turned in she will be dropped from the program and not get her doctorate. Great. A past due call on her electric bill. Wonderful.
She looks in her cupboards. She finds a bottle of wine, stale Oreos and a can of fruit. She looks around her very meager studio apartment. She sees the trunk she uses as a coffee table. In front of it is her futon. It will be a couch tonight. She was too tired to move or transform it. Her body aches. Her head is killing her. Her heart is bleeding. And silently her eyes are crying. Some how she manages to get the bottle of wine open and the can of fruit. She is half way through the bottle of wine curled up on the futon looking out to the stars peeking through the rain clouds bundled up in a thick comforter. No point in turning on the heat. She can't pay the bill anyway. Those stars will never be the same to her again. Life will never be the same again. She reaches for her cell phone. She watches her right hand reach for the phone. The blue topaz colored eyes catch in the light. They almost seem to glow. She picks up the phone and just stares at it. Who would she call? She has no friends… but one. She looks down at the ring. Her left hand reaches for the wine bottle and slowly finishes the last of the wine. Then she lays her head on the arm of the futon and slips into a dream. Her dreams that night were more than wine induced…..
She smiles up at him. But he is her size. Or is she his size? Reaching for his face again. It may look metallic. It may look hard as steel. But as her hand touches his face, it is so warm. Her hand can stroke the softness in it. He leans his face into her hand turning to kiss the palm. His hand is soft as he slips is around her waist and draws her against his body. It isn't hard. It is soft. It bends against hers. It curls around her. His tears wet her face. His voice…
She wakes up to her phone ringing. Her head is still a little wine-fuzzy. She checks the ID of the caller. The Ark. She doesn't answer it, what would she tell them? Instead she ducks her head back under the warm comforter. She strokes and twirls the ring on her hand. It's still there. This is real. This is all really happening. But the feelings? What can she do? What is he really feeling? Does she want….? What does she want? She curls back under the blanket to make up for so much lost sleep. Let the wine do it's job.
The next time she wakes up, she knows she has to face the real world. She needs food. She needs a shower. She needs to succeed. She needs to survive. She needs to endure. She needs to keep going.
So, Monique drains her savings working on paying some of these bills. Finds a job flipping hamburgers to just barely stay above the rent and partial payments on her college loan.
Mean while the text box is getting full of messages: Poco, we need to talk.
She tries to ignore it. Forget him. Ignore the overwhelming feelings. Poco, where are you?
Block out the nightmares. Please call me.
She doesn't respond. The messages start coming 3 or more times a day. Finally she sends one back. NO
Why, comes back simply. Yes why?, she asks herself.
Finally she decides the best thing to do is to wash herself of the whole thing. She contacts Lennox telling him she has information. He makes sure she is given access to the Ark. When she arrives the hanger doors are open. Ratchet is repairing Optimus' arm. She sees the pain on his face.
"Prime, this should be the last piece. I could do better if I had more Energon. Look, we have to be careful. Especially you. What were you thinking going alone?"
"Just fix the arm, Ratchet," Optimus orders through clenched jaw. He won't defend his actions.
She sees Ironhide giving a training session. Then they break into pairs to start sparing. Ironhide growls frustrated, "No no no!" Then he turns to Ratchet, "Aren't you done yet?" Ratchet looks up from his work only to give Ironhide a warning stare while welding a welding torch implying he was next. Ironhide backs down.
Ratchet finishes with Optimus' arm. Then softly as a friend he begs, "Please, Optimus, be more careful." Optimus puts a hand on a shoulder. Friend to friend. Then he joins Ironhide.
Ironhide tries his directions again with Optimus in front of him. They take the sparing stance and begin the ruckus. Bumble Bee screeches up behind Poco, flips Sam out and Bee dashes into the training session. Ironhide growls over his shoulder while still blocking Optimus blows, "You're late!" Bumble Bee humbly falls in line.
Sam turns to Poco, "Amazing, aren't they?" He is beaming. Poco just stares. Neither Ironhide or Optimus are using their full strength to the blows. But still the ground shakes. The clashes are loud and the grunts are real. They dodge and weave incredibly graceful. Then Optimus catches a glimpse of her in the doorway with Sam. He smiles just as Ironhide takes a swing at his chin. Keeping his eyes on her, he grabs Ironhide's wrist, gives it a twist, and with a wrestler's grace, grabs him around the leg and flips him onto his back and presses his fist to his chest (indicating a kill.) He grins triumphantly and the cheers go out. Ironhide's ego is wounded. Optimus walks away from the sparing match confidently towards Poco and Sam.
Quickly Poco shoves her laptop and books into Sam's arms, "Good-bye" she says and runs to her jeep. Optimus is confused and she jumps into her Jeep and tears off the base. She is fleeing from him again. Optimus is left standing there confused, and hurting.
As soon as she feels she is safely away, she pulls over and shuts off the engine. She lays her head on the steering wheel and tries to catch her breath. Her phone rings with a text. Are you alright?
She grabs her phone, rips out the battery and throws it into the back. Then the tears come. She tries to cover her face but feels the ring. The ring. The ring. She can't pull it off. It's Cybertronium, how will she get it cut off? "Oh God, I'm stuck." she pleads a prayer of help. She's not talking about the ring. The ring is loose compared to the grip someone has on her heart. She takes a few more minutes to get herself composed. A few deep breaths. Clear the head. She can walk away. There is nothing tying her here. Just a couple more weeks and she'll have that doctorate in her hand.
Back to class she goes. She finishes the thesis. She finishes the classes. Files the papers. Packs her bags. She ignores the texts that keep coming.
We need to talk. Are you okay? How are your studies? We found something. We need you.
Finally: I need you. Her chest tightens.
It's a lonely graduation. No friends or family to congratulate her. But that's what you get when you won't let anyone in. A final eviction notice awaits her when she comes home from being laid off from work with a fresh doctorate in her hand. Gathering her few belongings into her Jeep, she goes to the used car lot and buys herself a small travel trailer that the small jeep can handle.
She is free. Nothing left to tie her down. But one final text has her curious before she dumps the phone, too. Sarah Lennox. Meet me at the park, if you want. Poco ponders it for a while. What harm could it do?
Poco parks her jeep and trailer in the parking lot. Sarah is at the swings with little Grace. Sarah smiles at her, "I'm glad you came. I wasn't sure if you would."
Poco weakly smiles, "I wasn't either. Are we alone?" She looks right, left and up.
Sarah laughs, "Yes."
There's a silence and then Poco finally asks, "Who sent you?"
Sarah sighs, "Ironhide."
Poco shakes her head, "No, he didn't. He hates me." She looks out more carefully to the parking lot looking for a spy. "Why?"
She's pretty sure she knows the answer, but doesn't want to hear it. It could mess up her escape. Sarah watches Grace, "They need you." Then she looks right at Poco, "He does."
Poco shakes her head again trying to shake the grip loose on her heart, "Well, I don't."
Sarah points to her right hand, "Are you sure?" Poco looks down at her hand. It almost feels like it is burning. Once again, she tries to pull it off. She can't.
Sarah puts Grace into the stroller and walks down the path. Poco follows. Sarah tries again, nodding to the trailer, "Why are you running?"
Poco watches Sarah carefully. Can she trust her? Can she trust anyone? Can she trust herself? Sarah is very patient. As they round the basketball court, Poco asks quietly, "Have you seen Will in battle?" Sarah shakes her head. "Have you seen him spar?" Again she shakes her head.
She turns to Poco, "I just hold him when the nightmares come."
Poco nods her head. Yeah, she's had a few of those. But no one comforts her. Except in Europe she had slept the best…
Sarah sees her withdrawing. "What is your story? Who do you talk to?"
Poco laughs nervously. "That question has already back fired on me."
"Who betrayed your trust?" Sarah tries to get Poco to open up. Poco stops. Sarah tries again, "Why don't you come back to the Ark? They would really like you there. Will said you have been and important asset. Come back and talk to him." And Sarah didn't mean Will.
Quickly Poco puts up her defensive wall, "I thought this was a free country? That's what I was promised. Please, there are much smarter people who can figure this out. They don't need me. I'm sure the Cornel knows tons of people-"
"He got through your firewall. Didn't he?" Sarah cuts her off and ignoring the attitude.
Poco nervously starts to laugh, "You make it sound like we were dating!"
Sarah just gives her the, Well…look.
Poco continues her nervous laugh and put her hands on her hips, "I'm not dating an alien!"
Sarah points to the ring again, "Somebody thinks they are dating you."
Poco begins to get tears in her eyes as she laughs harder, "Come on, I saw this one in the National Enquirer last week: My boyfriend is and alien with a heart the size of a Mack truck." She laughs at the ridiculousness. Her guts are quivering. Sara is not laughing. Poco slowly calms down and wipes her eyes. The laughing is to hide the shaking heart in her chest. Then she asks Sarah, almost in a retort, "Alright, what did Ironhide say?"
Sarah gives Grace her Cheerios, "Will said a commander doesn't leave his troops for to tour Europe." She waits a moment finding Grace's sippy cup. "Ironhide said Optimus is extremely moody. No one knows but Will and Ironhide, but it has Ironhide worried which makes Will worried."
Poco's smile begins to fade, "It's not my fault. We are friends. It's not like we were-" Poco cuts herself off this time and her face drains of color remembering. "Oh Lord," she sighs and sinks into a bench.
Sarah looks at her, "What?" she notices the sudden change in Poco's face. "It's not like you were what?"
Poco almost whispers, "Sleeping together."
Sarah's eyes get real wide, "WHAT?" Poco can't move. Sarah sits down beside her and puts a soft hand on her arm, "What happened?"
Poco is trying to withdraw again. But Sarah's arm is so comforting. She looks up to Sarah, "You've got to promise not to tell anyone. Not even Will." Sarah nods. They wait until a couple joggers go by and then Poco tells her. "I don't want you to think I'm cracked." Sarah just gives her a reassuring smile. Poco takes a deep breath an plunges in:
"In Europe, we were in the Italian Alps. It was freezing. He was joking that he was so old and so cold he couldn't fold up. I was curled up in my sleeping bag but still freezing and shivering so bad. But I wouldn't tell him I was miserable. So before I knew it, he had me in his hand." Poco looks up into Sarah's eyes, "You wouldn't think a warriors hands could be so gentle." Sarah smiles and nods, understanding all too well. Poco continues her story, looking down at the ring, "He held me so close to his face that his breath kept me warm all night long. I woke up to him watching me sleep. He kept watch all night. He was so close, I touched his face. He smiled at me."
They are so quiet at the thought of the intimacy of the moment. Then quietly Poco tells her the rest, "In the morning I told him part of my story that no one knew." Poco bites her lip wondering if she should tell Sarah. Poco knows she is short on friends and that's one thing Optimus has been trying to teach her, let go. Let people in. Poco takes another deep breath and opens the dam.
"My father was the leader of our town. A small remote simple village. We had some of their refugees. There were also archeologist near by. My brother and I would help them, with my father's blessing. There was a big company that had been offering to modernize our town. My father and some of the other leaders thought the sacrifice was too great and said no. We even talked to the archeologists and they agreed. They knew there were other options.
"But others wanted to do it. It caused a split in the town. On the night of my quincenara there was a revolt. The ones who sided with the company rose up and killed my father. My mother grabbed me and my older brother and we fled. Once she knew we were safe with the archeologist, she went back for some of the other children of our friends. She did not come back. I begged my brother and the boy I loved not to go with their friends to retaliate. They did not return either."
Sarah drops her head, "Oh wow. You understand the plight of the Autobots very well. More than others."
Poco nods. Then her eyes plead with Sarah, "Did you know Optimus had a…mate?" Now it's Sarah's turn to be shocked. Poco covers her mouth realizing she probably said too much.
Sarah knows the weight of confidential information. So she smiles, "But he told you?" Poco nods heavily. "That took a lot trust for Optimus to tell you." Sarah wait's a moment and then pushes again, "Monique, he cares a lot about you. He trusts you with a very vital part of his life. The most vulnerable part of any soldier. Highly confidential for a commander…leader…. A Prime."
The tears begin to come. She doesn't want to break Optimus' heart, but she doesn't think she can be the support he needs. Monique tries again with Sarah, "That day on the Italian road when he went to fight, I knew I felt deeply for him. At that moment, I saw the friend and soft nature change to the warrior. I couldn't watch someone I care about die again in a civil war. I can't love him. That is so crazy! I'm a 30 year old woman. Not a young teenager infatuated with a celebrity. It's too ridiculous!"
"Any more than him loving you?" Sarah smiles.
Poco laughs, "He didn't say that."
"No, but Will knows it. Ironhide knows it. You both know it."
Poco holds Sarah's hand onto her arm tightly, "What am I going to do?"
"Hey we are only human. What can we do?" Sarah smiles. Poco laughs with her. Her mind flashes to the tenderness of the wine-induced dream. Then the symbols in the background of her dream. The code. Now she can translate them.
Monique suddenly jumps up and claps a hand to her forehead, "That's it! I'm so stupid! Human! That's the key!"
Sarah looks at her confused. Poco turns to her and clasps her hands to Sarah's shoulders, "Cortez didn't just bring smallpox to the Indians when he came. Either his or his ship brought a human virus when he came. I've got to call Ratchet." {see Jolt in Time}
She starts to run, when she turns back to Sarah and gives her a tight hug, "Thank you, friend." And she runs off. Sarah thinks she just saw a tornado take off.