Disclaimer: I do NOT own Ouran Highschool Host Club nor any of the characters from it.

CHAPTER TEN:

"Home Visits – Fujioka's House"

Tamaki gasped, staring in horror at the sight in front of him. The other Host Club members stood behind him, also staring in shock. They had gone to the Fujioka Residence to give Haruhi and her family a box of "Luxury Confectionery", but the sight of the house shook them to the core.

"It's not possible…" Tamaki muttered, staring at the house.

The house in question was in complete and utter shambles, the plants overgrown and brown, and the house looking like it could break and crumble into dust at any second.

"We have to knock though," Rin said as she walked up the footpath, moving past the other members. The others were still too much in shock to move, so she stood on the ledge of the house, knocking on the door.

It creaked very loudly, and then suddenly she was pulled back into Hikaru's grasp, watching with a shriek as the door fell from the hinges and slammed down onto the ground, dust forming all around them.

"That could have killed me," she muttered, trying to catch her breath.

"Are you alright, Rin?" Tamaki asked as he rushed over, grabbing her by the shoulders and out of Hikaru's arms.

"I'm alright, I think. It didn't touch me or anything."

"What is that!?" Honey-senpai called out as he pointed towards the empty space where the door had been.

A scrawny, pale arm emerged from the darkness, grabbing hold of the door and lifting it up, moving it back into place. The figure poked their head out of the darkness, revealing it to be a very skinny Haruhi. Her cheeks were hollow and she had huge bags under her eyes, which seemed almost lifeless.

"Ah, come on in, everyone," she said with a smile, her voice very hoarse.

The Host Club members quickly shared glances with each other, all hesitating before they entered the house.

Haruhi pulled on the string hanging from the ceiling, turning the single lightbulb on into the room. The inside of the house wasn't any better than the outside. The walls were covered in dust and dirt and cracks were scattered all across the walls and the roof.

"It's not much, but please, make yourself at home. I'll put some tea on, right?" she asked with a smile as she bent down on the ground to reach into one of the only cupboards inside the house, which was quite small and close to the floor. "Oh, but I'm sorry, I don't have enough cups." Her face fell as she grabbed an assortment of items and poured the clear tea inside them. "Be my guest."

She placed down one purple mug onto the table, a green saké cup, a clear measuring cylinder, a clear measuring cup, one red bowl and a blue bowl with a chip in the side.

"Sir, what kind of house is this?" Kaoru whispered as he picked up the blue bowl filled with tea.

"Does she really live here?" Rin asked.

"Is this some sort of set? Of all the…" Hikaru started.

"J-j-just calm down!" Tamaki stuttered, his eyes widening. "I'm sure this is just the storeroom. The unlimited cosmos is probably just beyond that closet."

"Well, should we open the closet?" they asked in unison.

- "No, don't!"

- "Kay!"

"Oh, yes, you've come over right at lunchtime, so my dad said to offer you something." Haruhi opened the second-last cupboard in the house – which lead to a black hole to the Host Club. "To make sure it would suit your tastes, I've been fasting for the last three days, and saving up that money. I also had to spend my nest egg."

She reached her hand into the black hole and pulled something out and placed it out in front of them. "Ta-da! Special-deluxe sushi! How about that?"

Supermarket-pack sushi

"Haruhi, why would you starve yourself just for us?" Rin asked, tears forming in her eyes. "We would have eaten anything you'd given us. Why go to such lengths?"

"But you're my friends. My father and I just wanted to make a good impression."

"Haru-chan, we're sorry we came to visit you!" Honey-senpai cried.

"Don't cry!" Tamaki commanded. "Don't let these last three days for Haruhi be for nothing. Just eat with care!"

"But these pickings are so slim!" Kaoru cried as he tried to hold in the horrible tasting sushi; Tamaki and Hikaru separating their chopsticks and getting ready to eat.

"Wow! By any chance, is this fancy tuna?" Haruhi asked, her eyes sparkling as she picked up a piece of tuna with her chopsticks. "This is my first time eating any."

"Ahh…" Tamaki started, staring in horror, trying to warn her before…

Chomp!

Haruhi shoved the piece of tuna into her mouth, a huge smile on her face.

Munch-munch!

"Fancy tuna is delicious!"

"T-that's just ordinary lean tuna, and is by no means fancy tuna!"

Tamaki panted as he sat up in bed, looking around before he realised he was sitting in his own bedroom. A smile came onto his face as he wiped the sweat from his forehead.

"It was a dream?" he asked himself with a sigh of relief.

…

Tamaki ran down the grand staircase, adjusting his tie as he carried his bag under his right arm, determination all over his face.

"Good morning, Master Tamaki," an old woman wearing a purple kimono greeted as she stood in front of Tamaki.

Suou 2nd Residence Chief of Staff, Maezono Shima (82)

"I'm leaving at once. Please bring the car around immediately."

"Yes, Master," his driver said with a bow as he headed outside the mansion.

"Begging your pardon, Tamaki-sama, but what will you have for breakfast?"

"Ah, enough!" Tamaki screeched. "There's no time for that!"

My head is filled with a dreadful foreboding right now. Out of regard for their privacy, I have not sought to intrude into club members' private lives. However, if Haruhi really is living a life as poor as that, then I have to see Haruhi right away, and find out the truth of the matter. I have to get to school!

"Begging your pardon, Tamaki-sama!" Shima shouted, breaking him out of his dramatic thoughts. "You are still half-dressed in pyjamas, and you still have house slippers on your feet."

Tamaki stopped in his tracks, taking a second to look at what he was actually wearing. He had on his shirt, blazer and tie, but he still wore his baby blue pyjama pants and his white bunny slippers.

He screamed as he turned back around and sprinted all the way up the stairs, going back to his room to change.

"My, what poor manners," Shima sighed.

Tamaki quickly walked back down the stairs, clearly embarrassed as he cleared his throat. "All right, once again, I will be off."

"Sincerely begging your pardon, Tamaki-sama, but today is Sunday, so there is no school today."

"Shima, couldn't you have told me that at the very start?"

"Your maidservant only wishes daily for the Master to grow up to be a fine gentleman, capable of realizing his own mistakes." She grabbed hold of Tamaki by the back of his blazer, dragging him across the ground. "If you have no other plans, come and study your manners with me."

"I have other plans! I have other plans!" he screamed.

A few of the maids lined up beside the staircase started to laugh, as Shima opened the door and almost dragged him into the black hole that lied behind it.

"Somebody, bring me the phone!"

"Here," a cheerful maid said as she grabbed hold of the old dial phones on top of a purple pillow case. He forced himself out of Shima's hold as he rushed over to the phone, turning the dial to each number.

"Tch…" Shima muttered in disappointment.

Tamaki held the large phone up to his ear, waiting for the phone to stop dialling. A quick and tired 'hello' came from the other side of the phone and Tamaki suddenly became very serious.

"Kyoya, is that you? I need to discuss something important with you."

A Day in the Life of the Fujioka Family!

I got the advertised specials! Haruhi thought as she walked down the street, holding a bag filled with Marutomi Supermarket groceries. The supermarket really is the place to spend a Sunday morning. Once I get home, I've got cleaning and laundry to do…

The smile vanished from her face as she noticed something parked right outside the apartment complex. "Huh? What's this, out front of our apartment?"

It was a black limo, a crowd of people surrounding it as they all gasped in awe.

- "What is this? Who're the rich people?" one of the men in the crowd asked.

- "Master, if you please…" the driver said as he stood outside the passenger door, opening it as the people inside stepped out.

[Tamaki]:

A large green sweater, light blue jeans, a black t-shirt underneath with a pair of fashionable sunglasses on his face.

[Kyoya]:

A sleeveless, dark grey vest, beige Khakis, a red tank top underneath and a black belt hanging from the side.

[Hikaru]:

A sleeveless red and yellow vest, a white hoddie underneath with a pair of dark green pants.

[Kaoru]:

A sleeveless white vest, a red and yellow t-shirt underneath and a pair of dark green pants.

[Rin]:

A sleeveless, cream coloured collared dress, the top layer transparent with a cream underdress, a black bow around the waist and a white handbag.

[Mori-senpai]:

A sleeveless black and white – open – vest, a blue tank top underneath and a pair of black and red stripped pants.

[Honey-senpai]:

A blue and white collared shirt with an anchor patched into the side, a pink belt and a pair of dark blue shorts.

Haruhi slammed her head against the traffic pole beside her, letting her body lean at an angle as her head supported her weight.

"Wow, so this is Haruhi's house, huh?" Kaoru asked.

"It's pretty big, isn't it?" Hikaru asked. "Bigger than I thought."

"It has lots of rooms," Honey-senpai cheered.

"No, this is what's called aggregate commoner dwelling," Kyoya said with his arms crossed.

"She only lives in one of the rooms here, other people live in the others," Rin said as she gave a yawn, wanting to go back and sleep.

"Kyoya!" Tamaki shouted as he grabbed hold of Kyoya's shoulders. "What's with all of these people!? Especially those two doppelgangers!"

"Oh. I was sure that you didn't have the courage to come alone, so it would be better if we came en masse. I guess that was uncalled for." He patted the twins on the back. "Okay, children, let's go home."

"No way! I don't want to go home!"

"I'm sorry." Tamaki quickly rushed over, stopping them. "Forgive me. I don't want to be alone."

Rin gave a sigh as she looked around the street, staring at all the people who were staring at the limos in awe. To them, it seemed to sparkle. She wondered what it must be like for these people, to suddenly see two limos and a bunch of rich-looking people step out of them.

"What is this? Some kind of movie shoot?" one of them asked.

"Rich people! Rich people!" a small boy cheered as he twirled around.

Rin walked over to the group, her heels clicking against the ground attracting them to turn to her, the little boy seeming to cheer even louder.

"Cute girl! Cute girl!" he cheered, making her laugh.

His mother quickly hushed him.

"Don't worry, we're just here to visit our friend," Rin said with a smile. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Haruhi shaking her head with a groan, motioning for her to stop talking to them. "We'll be out of here soon."

The crowd seemed disappointed, but Tamaki quickly grabbed her and dragged her away from the crowd of "commoners", placing her right in the middle of the Host Club members.

"Listen up, men," he started. "Do not forget…This is just a 'we happened to be passing by' sort of nonchalant visit, and is definitely not research on the Fujioka family's standard of living!"

"Research? I thought we were just visiting-"

"The words 'shabby', 'cramped', and 'run-down', are absolutely forbidden!" Tamaki continued, interrupting Rin with his hands on his hips.

"Yes, sir!" the twins and Honey-senpai said as they saluted.

None of them seemed to notice a pretty pissed off Haruhi standing right behind them, the veins on her head starting to form and grow bigger.

"Under no circumstances are you to say or do anything to make Haruhi or her father wish that we would leave."

"Uh, Tamaki…" Rin started as she pointed at Haruhi.

"I'm trying to make sure they don't do anything stupid while we're seeing Haruhi, Rin!" Tamaki interrupted again.

"Too late for that. Go away, right now!" Haruhi shouted, making Tamaki turn around and gasp in horror at being caught. But the horror quickly vanished when he noticed what she was wearing.

"Haruhi!"

She wore a long and baggy pink dress, with a white t-shirt underneath and blue jeans on.

The one-piece is cute

"Plain and simple, looking good!" It's not very hard to guess which four members said that as they stuck their thumps up with huge grins.

"Shut up! Get the hell out of here!"

"Haruhi is using incredibly dirty language!" Tamaki shrieked. "Haruhi is using incredibly dirty language!"

- "This is all your fault!" Tamaki screamed.

- "It wasn't me," the twins said.

"Excuse me, Haruhi-chan, is everything all right?" an elderly woman asked as she tapped Haruhi on the shoulder.

"Oh, Miss Landlady."

"Driving up in foreign cars like this, are these people the Yakuza or something?"

- "No, um…"

- "Should I call the police?"

"Oh, don't worry Miss," Rin said as she walked over. "We're not the Yakuza or anything like that. We're just"

"Pleased to meet you, madam," Tamaki said as he bumped Rin out of the way, gently grabbing hold of the woman's hand.

"Hey!" Rin yelled as she had her hands on her hips, standing beside Haruhi who had quickly rushed over to get out of the way.

"You alright?" she asked, still staring with wide eyes at Tamaki as he quickly flicked on his charm.

"Yeah, his hips are really bony though," Rin muttered.

"My name is Suoh, and I'm one of Haruhi-san's friends."

"Oh, my, my, my, what am I to do?"

"Miss Landlady…" Haruhi grumbled.

"I'm terribly sorry for suddenly stopping by like this and causing a stir."

"Oh, not at all." The elderly woman started to giggle, quickly rushing over to Haruhi. "Haruhi-chan, I'll come drop off some snacks later, okay?" She turned and gave a wave to Tamaki. "Please make yourself at home."

…

Fujioka

All of the Host Club members stood in front of her apartment door, glaring at Tamaki more than the others as she forced him to carry one of her grocery bags as she got the key out of her pocket.

"I'm warning you right now, you just get a little look, like three seconds," Haruhi said.

The twins started applauding as Tamaki suddenly started looking around, like he had lost something.

"Once you've seen it, you'll immediately"

"Haru-chan, I bought a gift! It's cake!" He held up the same box of Luxury Confectioneries that Tamaki had in his dream. "It has both strawberry and chocolate, and some others, too."

"Well, I guess we can have tea," Haruhi said reluctantly as she turned the key, unlocking the door. She opened it wide, letting everyone see inside. It was a small little apartment, but it was still quite enough, especially since it was only two of them living there.

Whew, Tamaki sighed with relief. I guess it's a little better than my dream.

"Shabby," Hikaru muttered.

Tamaki quickly turned around and grabbed Hikaru by the cheeks, pulling them apart until Hikaru cried out in surrender.

"A wood-built, two-story 2K. That's about right for a two-person, father-daughter commoner family," Kyoya said, inspecting the apartment.

"Yeah. At Haruhi's size, she won't go hitting her head on the low ceilings," Kaoru said.

"It's an absolutely darling little room!" Honey-senpai said.

"That's okay, you don't have to force yourself to compliment it," Haruhi grumbled as she slipped off her shoes, leaving them at the front door.

Rin was about to walk onto the floor before Haruhi quickly stopped her, gently pushing her back onto the wooden floor at the front of the door. She didn't say anything as she pointed down to Rin's shoes.

"Huh? Haru-chan, we take off our shoes?" Honey-senpai asked.

"Yes, please."

"We have to take our shoes off before going in. This room is like a dojo, huh?"

"Yeah," Mori-senpai replied.

"Well, let us borrow some slippers," Hikaru said.

"Oh, I can see a tatami-floored room right there," Kaoru pointed out.

"In that case, we don't need slippers, huh?"

"Okay, forgive the intrusion!" the twins and Honey-senpai said as they entered the house, walking straight past her and into the living room.

"Pardon the intrusion," Mori-senpai said with a nod.

"Excuse us," Tamaki said.

"Forgive the intrusion," Kyoya said as they all entered the living room.

Rin stood at the door, slipping off her high heels as she placed them neatly beside Haruhi's sandals, unlike the Hosts – expect Kyoya and Mori-senpai - who had chucked them around in their excitement to get inside the house.

"Thank you," Haruhi said gratefully as she walked over to her.

"I'm so sorry," Rin said, her cheeks flushed as she stepped onto the floor, giving Haruhi extremely apologetic looks.

"What are you apologizing for?" Haruhi asked, a little taken aback by Rin's sudden embarrassment.

"I disrespected your customs, didn't I?" She gave a guilty sigh. "I knew I should have paid more attention during lessons."

"It's alright, Rin. You're the only one out of them who I would let walk on my carpet in shoes. It's your first time in one of these. And don't worry if you stuff up on any more supposedly 'Japanese' customs, only you are allowed a pass."

"Oh thank you, so much!" Rin said as she hugged Haruhi's arm. "I thought you might have hated me for that. I heard about how sensitive some people can get in regards to foreigners."

"You're better than most of the residents," Haruhi grumbled as she gave a glare over to the other Host Club members.

- "Woah! Is this all?" Hikaru asked.

- "Ow," Mori-senpai said.

- "You won't expect a light to be hanging down there, huh?" Kaoru asked.

"It looks like we haven't given commoners' housing enough credit," Tamaki said. "All right, it's tight in here, so everyone try your best to sit gym-style. This is the way that commoners came up with to cut down on space."

Each of the members in the living room pulled their legs up to their chests, wrapping their arms around their legs as they sat down around a single wooden table.

Just get through this. You can't expect anything from these people, Haruhi thought bitterly, the vein in her head starting to throb.

"You okay, Haruhi?" Rin asked.

Maybe only one of them…

"I'm fine. And whatever you do, don't listen to Tamaki about culture customs. We don't sit like that," Haruhi said.

"Alright, thanks for the help."

"I'll put some tea on," Haruhi yelled over to the other members.

"Oh, Haruhi, as far as tea goes, I have this black tea that our father bought as a souvenir from Africa. Here," Hikaru said as he handed her the orange bag filled with the tea.

"Oh, thanks."

"It's best as a milk tea. Do you have any milk?" Kaoru asked.

"Mm-hmm, we do have some milk…"

"I could help you if you'd like," Rin offered, but Haruhi shook her head.

"Don't worry, you just take a seat."

Haruhi walked away with a slight smile on her face, wondering if she should consider inviting Rin over more often. She knew her father would take a special liking to her.

As soon as Rin sat down, crossing her legs, Tamaki grabbed hold of the twins in almost a headlock.

"You idiots!" Tamaki whisper-yelled to the twins. "How could you do something like this to her?"

"What?"

"Are you trying to embarrass Haruhi by giving her that stuff? Look! Look at how Haruhi is at a total loss over what to do!"

"She doesn't have a teapot," Hikaru said.

"And she can't bring herself to tell us so!" Kaoru cried, while Rin rolled her eyes. "H-Haruhi, I'm sorry, you don't have to make that tea. Water will be fine for us."

"Huh? Really? But I've already made it," Haruhi said.

In a kyusu teapot…

Kyusu = a teapot designed to brew green tea

"Oh, well in that case, okay."

"Whew, that was a close one," Hikaru said with a sigh.

"We were narrowly rescued by commoners' wisdom," Tamaki said.

"How do you mean?" Kaoru asked.

"In this place, none of our common knowledge holds true."

Unknown space "It's a Commoner's World"

"There's no telling but one of our offhanded remarks might inflict serious damage upon Haruhi's heart. Thus, in this fight…whoever embarrasses Haruhi is the loser."

Ready for action

"I haven't the slightest idea why you need to turn this into a contest," Kyoya said, looking at all the books stacked on the bookshelf.

"The tea is ready," Haruhi announced, carrying over a tray with eight cups on it, filled almost to the brim with the black tea. "Sorry the cups don't all match."

Good, at least there aren't any chipped bowls and measuring cups.

Haruhi took a sit beside Rin as Honey-senpai excitedly pulled out the box of confectionary and placed it onto the table.

"Haru-chan, you get to choose your cake first," he said with a huge smile, opening the lid to reveal many delicious and expensive looking cakes and treats.

"Oh, are you sure?" she asked as she inspected each cake and sweet.

"Sure."

- "After all, we're used to eating this stuff," Hikaru said.

- "Well then, let's see…" Haruhi started.

- "Shh!" Tamaki and Kaoru whispered.

- "Are you trying to get her down?" Tamaki asked.

"The strawberry one," Haruhi decided as Honey-senpai placed the tart with whipped cream, a scoop of ice cream with four strawberries on top onto a plate. Then pulling out the other three and doing the same.

"How cute!"

- "So cute, but I can't move," Tamaki said.

- "Okay, Haru-chan, you, Rin, Takashi and me will have strawberry, and the others can have what they want."

- "How did you know I like strawberries, Honey-senpai?" Rin asked.

- "Because you always order a cake with strawberries when serving the guests!"

- "There's no telling what might offend Haruhi!" Hikaru said.

- "The traps of the commoner's world are terrifying!"

Haruhi stared down at the tart in front of her, holding her fork and ready to take a bite when she noticed a fork placing down a strawberry onto her plate.

"You like strawberries?" Mori-senpai asked.

"Yes! Thank you."

He gave her a smile, right before he picked up a second strawberry and placed it onto Rin's plate, who had just taken a bite out of her first strawberry.

"Thank you Mori-senpai!" Rin said as she patted him on the shoulder, which made him nod with a smile.

Haruhi and Rin turned to each other with a laugh before they both took a bite from the strawberry tart.

"Should we have taken action!?" Hikaru asked.

"I wanted to give them to her!" Tamaki sobbed, slamming his hand on the floor.

"We were taken in!" Kaoru screamed.

"I think I feel a headache coming on," Rin whispered and Haruhi nodded.

"I've had one for months."

…

"Ah, after eating that cake, I'm getting a bit peckish," Honey-senpai said as he stared at the empty plate in front of him.

"Now that you mention it, it is long past lunchtime," Hikaru said.

- "Is lunch ready?" the twins and Tamaki asked, tilting their heads.

- "Is lunch ready?" Honey-senpai asked.

"Could you please stop living so relentlessly fancy-free?" Haruhi asked.

"Now, we're the ones who dropped in on you without warning, so we'll put up the money," Kyoya said as he stood up, rummaging through his pocket to pull out his wallet. "Why not order some of your favourite sushi, or something?"

"No, that's okay," Haruhi said. "Kyoya-senpai, I'm going to dread it later if it's on you."

"Not to worry. This comes out of sales of photos of you that we auctioned." He held up a shiny, golden credit card, which made Haruhi shiver.

"Then, isn't this really on me? All right. I have a friend who runs a nice sushi shop nearby, so I'll give them a call. They'll have some high-quality stuff."

Tamaki quickly gasped in horror as he grabbed hold of Rin's handbag, rummaging through it till he found a notebook.

"Hey! I did not give you permission to go through my things!"

He ripped out a single sheet of paper, grabbed her pen and quickly started writing something down. He quickly rushed over to Haruhi and handed it to her before rushing back.

Rin angrily stood up and grabbed hold of her handbag, also snatching her notebook and pen away from Tamaki, who gave a whimper in response.

"'Even if the sushi pack says 'premium' on it, you can't call it 'high-quality'. Be very careful'," Haruhi read, a frown coming to her face as she scrunched up the piece of paper, chucking it into the waste basket. "I know that much, at least."

"Aah, you dummy!" Tamaki screamed to himself, failing his arms around as tears formed in his eyes. "Daddy even took care to act all casual, so as not to embarrass you!"

"So, I guess Tamaki lost," Rin said as Hikaru and Kaoru high-fived.

"I'd like to have something made by you, Haru-chan," Honey-senpai said.

"Honey-senpai!" Hikaru screamed.

"What a daring thing to say!" Kaoru shouted.

"We were holding back, ourselves!" Tamaki fussed.

"That's fine, but even starting now, it will take some time," Haruhi said.

"We'll wait!"

"And don't even try to resist," Rin said to Haruhi. "I'm helping you make lunch no matter what."

Haruhi smiled. "That's fine with me."

"Yay! Rin-chan is cooking too!"

"Maybe we should have asked her!" the twins cried.

"We'll get to eat Haruhi and Rin's cooking!" Tamaki sobbed.

"Well, I'll have to go to the supermarket again," Haruhi said with a sigh.

"Oh, I'm coming," Hikaru said.

"We want to come to the commoners' supermarket, too," Kaoru said.

"Me too! Me too!" Honey-senpai cheered.

"Well, this might be a good experience," Kyoya said with a shrug.

It turns out everyone is going

"Yay! Commoners' supermarket, commoners' supermarket!" the twins cheered as they ran out the door.

"Isn't this fun?" Honey-senpai asked as he walked beside Mori-senpai.

"What's the use?" Haruhi asked with a sigh as Kyoya walked out the door. "I guess I'm giving up my day off."

"I'm sorry Haruhi," Rin said as she patted Haruhi on the back.

"Rin! Hurry up!" Kaoru shouted from outside.

"The commoners' supermarket is calling us!" Hikaru shouted.

"And how do you live with them?" Haruhi asked as Rin put on her shoes.

"They don't bother me as much when their mother's there," Rin said with a smile as she headed out the door.

Haruhi noticed that one of the members – specifically the most excited one – was missing. She headed into the next room. "Senpai? Aren't you coming?"

He was seated on top of a green pillow, his knees folded and his feet underneath him as he sat in front of the small display in the corner.

"Yeah, I'm coming. Before I do, though, I'm paying my respects to your mother."

On the display was a photo of Haruhi's mother, her long dark brown hair tied up into a ponytail as she wore a white, formal shirt. Beside it were a vase of flowers and a little black statue that represented good luck in the afterlife.

"Thanks for going to the trouble of doing so."

He picked up the photo to take a closer look. "Haruhi, you take after your mother, huh?"

"Yeah, my dad says so, too."

"She was pretty. She looks smart, too."

"I don't know if she's pretty or not, but she was a lawyer," she said as she sat down, holding her knees to her chest.

"Oh, I'll bet she was a pretty capable one, too. You can't fool these eyes."

"Senpai, I won't say anything about your eyes…but…"

"Haruhi, Mom is going to do her best today, so we're going to win!"

"…I do think she was," Haruhi continued with a smile on her face.

Tamaki's face dropped, his bangs covering his eyes as he thought about his own mother. He put the photo back on the shelf, suddenly feeling awkward.

"W-we're keeping everyone waiting. How about we get going?" he asked, patting the floor as he stood up. But, his foot landed straight on top of a banana peel. He screamed as he fell to the floor, Haruhi gasping as she was almost crushed by his weight.

"Yow…" he groaned, pushing himself up off of Haruhi with his hands. "I'm sorry, Haruhi!"

"It's okay, you're just heavy…"

"I'm home, Haruhi!" a voice called from the doorway. It was a woman with a man's voice twirling as they entered the house. They had long wavy red hair and light brown eyes. "Why is the door open?"

Then it went silent as they noticed what was happening.

"Dad…" Haruhi said.

"Ah!" Tamaki screamed internally as he cried.

- "All of a sudden, her father came home…" Mori-senpai started.

"…From his shift at the tranny bar," Honey-senpai finished.

Ranka, real name: Ryoji Fujioka (35)

- "He saw his daughter pushed down…"

"…Or so it appeared…"

- "…On the floor, being held down…"

"…Or so it appeared…"

- "…By an unfamiliar boy."

"Dad"? Does that mean this tranny is Haruhi's father? Tamaki thought.

Tamaki instantly understood what the situation was.

"Oh, Dad, welcome home," Haruhi said.

Just stay calm. This was just an accident. If I explain what happened, he'll understand.

Haruhi's father stared in shock for a second before he formed a fake smile on his face. He quickly walked across the floor in his bare feet towards them.

"I'm sorry…" He bent down and grabbed Tamaki by the face, pushing him backwards until he slammed into the wall. "…For leaving you home all alone last night. You must have been lonesome."

"That sounded really bad just now…" Haruhi stuttered out as she watched Tamaki slid down the wall, a giant hole in the wall from where his face landed.

"Oh, dear, my left arm aches, like I just knocked down the biggest beast of the century," Haruhi's father said as he held a hand to his shoulder, rolling it with a fake smile on his face.

- "Um…Father…" Tamaki stuttered.

- "Maybe I'm working too hard. I'd sure like some hot tea."

"Right!" Tamaki shouted as he shot to his feet, running over to the kitchen and grabbing hold of a teapot – which hadn't been there before – and ran around, all over the place. "T-tea! Haruhi, do you boil your water with firewood? Where should I put the firewood?"

Haruhi's father slammed his foot down on Tamaki's body, sending him to the ground with a loud thud and scream.

"Oh, dear, I seem to have found a huge pest. And exactly why have you been dropping honorifics when addressing my daughter!?"

"Sir, you were taking so long that we…" Hikaru started as both he and Kaoru poked their heads through the door.

"Oh, so that guy that passed us downstairs is Haruhi's papa, after all," Kaoru said.

"Hikaru! Kaoru! It's divine intervention!" Tamaki cried out, right before the twins slammed their feet into his head, walking on his body.

"Ah, hello. We're Haruhi-san's good friends, the Hitachiin Brothers."

"Papa-san, you're a tranny?" Hikaru asked.

"You're the first genuine tranny we've ever seen," Kaoru said.

"Sir, did you finally put the moves on Haruhi?" they asked in unison.

"Sorry about that. This guy is a dyed-in-the-wool ladies' man."

"He's a pheromone machine, who's fooled around with more girls than he's got capillaries."

"Fooled around?" Haruhi's father asked, the veins in his head starting to throb at the thought.

"No!" Tamaki shouted. "Who are you saying is fooling around!? I sincerely…"

Eh? Is he confessing his love? The twins thought.

Tamaki went on his hands and knees, bowing all the way down to the ground in front of Haruhi's father. "…Sincerely think of your girl as though as she were my own daughter!"

And then it went too quiet as everyone stared at him.

Haruhi's father's first impression of Tamaki

He's an idiot

…

"I see. You're the Host Club I've been hearing about. You really are a fine set of boys. I don't know which one of you I would take. Huh, Haruhi? Haruhi, you never told me your girlfriend here was so cute! And she dresses so girly! Ah, I always wished my daughter would dress like you! Oh, you can just call me Ranka-san. 'Ranka' is the professional name I use at the tranny bar where I work."

"Professional name? Like a stage name?" Honey-senpai asked.

"That's right, Mitsukuni-kun."

"Huh? How do you know my name?"

"3rd-Years Haninozuka-kun and Morinozuka Takashi-kun…And you would be the 1st-Years, in the same class as Haruhi, Hayashi-Bellerose Rin-chan and Hitachiin Hikaru-kun and Kaoru-kun, right? Which one of you is which, I wonder…" He moved his head closer to Rin. "I'm sure you can though, right?" he whispered, before going back to address the group. "I'm always hearing stories about you."

"Huh? Haruhi talks about us?" Kaoru asked.

"Mm-mm, it's always from Kyoya-kun on the phone."

Ranka turned to Kyoya and placed his hands up to his, a huge smile on his face.

"Ranka-san, you really are beautiful," Kyoya said with a smile.

"What!?"

"Kyoya…" Tamaki grumbled, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"We're looking after his precious daughter. It's only natural that I'd say hello, and give periodic reports on her, right?" He raised the cup of tea to his mouth, a smug look on his face. "Ordinarily, that should be your job, right?"

Tamaki felt like he had been punched in the stomach as he flung backwards, leaving Kyoya to drink his tea.

"You really are a fine club president," Ranka gushed. "Oh, Kyoya-kun, you're the vice-president, aren't you? So the president isn't good for much, huh?"

"Hold on there, Dad! I never heard that you were keeping contact with Kyoya-senpai!"

"Huh? But Haruhi, you never tell me about anything at school."

"So then, without telling me, you…Senpai, would you please stop growing mushrooms in other people's closets!?"

"Haruhi, the thing about you is…you're even cute when you're angry!" Ranka lunched himself at her, grabbing her and pulling her into a hug.

Super-doting parent

"There's something about this guy that reminds me an awful lot of someone," Hikaru pointed out.

"It explains why Haruhi is so good at handling his highness," Kaoru said.

Haruhi gently pushed her father off of her, him landing on the ground as she started walking to the door.

"Oh, no, where are you going?"

"The supermarket." She slipped on her shoes. "I'm going shopping, all by myself. I'll be right back, so everyone, please behave yourselves. Rin, I'm leaving you in charge of them." She quickly pushed the door open and headed outside before anyone could follow.

"Will do, boss!" Rin called with a laugh.

"Ah, Haruhi! We want to go to the commoners' supermarket, too!" Hikaru shouted as he was about to stand up.

"Too bad," Rin said as she pushed him back down to sitting down, Kaoru peeking around the corner of the wall with a pout.

"That's okay, that's okay. Once she's spoken, she won't listen to you. That girl made up her mind to go to Ouran, and did all the enrolment paperwork by herself. I'd like to respect her spirit of independence, but sometimes, I wish she'd depend on me more."

The Fujioka Family, 8 years ago

"Haruhi!" Ranka called, his hair much shorter and was a light brown colour. "Why didn't you tell me that it was Parents' Day at school today?"

The young eight year old Haruhi quickly turned her head, her long, fringed hair flicking over her shoulders as she narrowed her eyebrows.

"Oh, no! Dad, you can't come to Parents' Day!"

…

Matsubara Liquor Store – Sake

"Huh? Haruhi-chan is going through a rebellious phase?" his co-worker asked, carrying a whole crate of sake bottles. "I think you've got that wrong, don't you? She just couldn't invite you to Parents' Day because she's embarrassed that daddy is a tranny, right?"

"Let me remind you, I've always been bi! But now that I've settled on loving on one besides Kotoko, I'm just trying to keep my reputation, so I can keeping working in the shop."

…

"Hey, Haruhi-chan! Your dad's gone and drunk himself stupid!" his co-worker called as he opened the door to the house, one arm slung over Ranka's shoulder.

"Haruhi-chan, I'm home!" Ranka called as he rushed over, lifting her off the ground to hug her.

"Whoa, you reek of liquor," she murmured.

"Looks like he was pretty upset about not going to Parent's Day. Invite him next time, okay?"

Ranka had now sat down on the floor, holding her small figure in his arms as he nuzzled her neck. She lowered her head.

"No."

Ranka's smile dropped, his body starting to shake as he felt his eyes starting to water.

"I'd rather let him have some time off at home than come to Parents' Day. He's exhausted, so he should stay home and sleep on his day off. I want him to take care of himself."

Ranka's eyes widened at her words, a tear falling from his eyes as he embraced her tighter. She slowly wrapped her arms around her father, both sitting on the floor in each other's embrace.

"I'm grateful to you guys. She seems to be happy and enjoying herself at school now, in her own way. Right, Suou Tamaki-kun?"

"Father-" Tamaki started, his face brightening up as he popped his head of his now "Mushroom Room".

"I knew who you were at first glance. You're the idiot club president that often comes up in Haruhi's stories."

So Haruhi does talk about the Host Club, does she? Kyoya thought.

"Come to think of it, you're the one who mistook Haruhi for a boy right up to the end, aren't you? You just don't get it, do you? You're awful."

Tamaki quickly retreated back into the mushroom room.

"Now then, let's never mind that, why don't we all have ourselves some fun?"

…

"I never knew." Haruhi gave a sigh as she walked down the street, glancing at the ground. "Who'd have thought that Dad and Kyoya-senpai were in touch with each other?"

Right behind the pole she just walked past were the Host Club members and Ranka, wearing a pair of sunglasses and a scarf to cover his mouth.

"So we end up going with her after all, huh?" the twins asked.

"Isn't this considered invasion of privacy?" Rin murmured, but the twins just shrugged in response.

"This is what you meant by 'fun'?" Kyoya asked.

"This is tailing-play, Kyoya-kun." Ranka than gave a thumbs up.

"Those are good-looking boys, aren't they?" they heard a girl whisper to her friend as they stared from across the street.

"That girl's quite attractive, too."

- "Could they be TV personalities?"

- "Then again…I just wanted to go walking around with lots of fine boys in tow!" Ranka exclaimed as he lowered his sunglasses to reveal his determined eyes.

"I can't really fault you there," Rin said, making Ranka turn to her with a smile.

"You should come around more often," he said to her as he went and inspected her dress and also her shoes. "We could play dress-up! Oh, if only Haruhi was as girly as you are, dear!" He linked his arm with hers as he dragged her down the street, following much closer behind Haruhi.

"Sure enough, this one and that one are cut from the same cloth," the twins commented as they glanced at each other.

…

Marutomi Supermarket

Haruhi stared at the food in front of her, inspecting the celery sticks and wondering if she should use them. She ended up grabbing two bags and placing them into her shopping basket before heading over to the next stand.

Honey-senpai giggled as he tried to run down the aisles to inspect everything, but Mori-senpai quickly grabbed him and dragged him back out of people's way.

The twins were paying close attention to Haruhi every now and then, studying the art of a commoner in a commoners' supermarket and taking notes.

Kyoya and Rin went looking at the items on the shelves, him checking the backs of each product and inspecting all the ingredients and quantities, while Rin put some in the shopping basket for dinner that night.

"Why do we need to go this far to secretly watch how she's doing, Father?" Tamaki asked as he stood beside Ranka, both of them peeking their heads out from behind some food stands.

"She lost her mother at an early age, and took all of the housework, to say nothing of the shopping, upon herself. I couldn't help but develop a habit of following after her. Would you call that a father's love? Sure, I worry about her, you know? I'm the only one who can protect her, after all."

Haruhi, 6 years ago

Haruhi read off the shopping list in front of her, looking for the next set of aisles when she noticed something sticking out from one of the food shelves.

"Huh?" she peeked her head around and saw her father with the same short hair but instead wearing pink lipstick. "Dad, what's the matter?"

"Oh, er, um…" He started panicking at the thought of being caught. "I just suddenly wanted to carry your shopping basket, Haruhi! Dad loves to carry shopping baskets! Can you believe it?"

She blinked in surprise for a few seconds, before a wide smile formed on her face. "You're weird," she said with a laugh.

"Whether she doesn't know how to rely on others, or if she just has no desire to, she doesn't give you the chance to worry over her. And yet, she has a way of saving others without even realising it."

"Yeah, that's something…I understand."

"There's no way you could understand it!" Ranka screamed as he grabbed hold of Tamaki's cheek, pulling it and stretching his face. "Where do you get off, just because you're a little bit handsome? I'm warning you, I'm not ready to let go just yet!"

"Please, let go…"

"You've got some nerve, for someone who's only known her a few days! And so…You're the enemy! I consider you an enemy!"

Tamaki screamed, crying as Ranka kicked him out of their hiding place, right in front of Haruhi as he fell to the ground.

"Huh? Tamaki-senpai, what's the matter?" she asked.

"Oh, er, um….I just suddenly wanted to carry your shopping basket, Haruhi! Yes, Daddy loves to carry shopping baskets! Can you believe it?"

She blinked in surprise for a few seconds, before a wide smile formed on her face. "You're weird," she said with a laugh.

Ranka stared in surprise, standing up as she watched as Haruhi and Tamaki interacted with each other, thinking of how similar both him and Tamaki really were.

"Oh, mushrooms…" Haruhi trailed off.

"Wahhh!" Honey-senpai cheered as he sat in the shopping trolley, Mori-senpai behind pushing it.

"So, 'time service' means there's a time limit, huh?" Kyoya questioned as he wrote down some notes.

"Ah, there's a whole stack of commoners' coffee," Hikaru pointed out.

- "Just like at the international market, huh?" Kaoru asked.

- "Was there anything you wanted to eat?" Haruhi asked.

"Um, a stewpot. With lots of meat in it, and no chrysanthemum," Tamaki said nervously, not wanting to make eye contact with her.

"You're right. When there are a lot of people, a stewpot would be better, huh? It's kind of warm for it, though…Rin!"

"Yes?" Rin asked, poking her head out from behind one of the aisles, a shopping basket filled with ingredients.

"Oh, what are you shopping for?"

"Dinner. Mrs. Hitachiin gave me a list of food to cook since she's out of town this week."

"We need to get ingredients for a stewpot," Haruhi pointed out.

"Without chrysanthemum," Tamaki quickly added.

Ranka stared at them. Even so, if at some point, the day comes when that unselfish girl dearly wants to have just one person at her side…

…

The bot filled with various amounts of meats and vegetables was staring to boil over the stove, the amazing smells filling the house.

"Sure enough, it galls me just thinking about it!" Ranka shouted out loud, everyone staring in confusion as to what he was talking about – or thinking about.

- "Here, have some chrysanthemum…" Ranka said, giving him a whole bowl full. "…And some more chrysanthemum…"

- "I wanted meat…" Tamaki whimpered.

- "Wow, there's so much meat!" Hikaru said.

- "This is delicious," Honey-senpai gushed. "Well done Rin-chan and Haru-chan."

- "Good job you two," Kaoru said.

- "Thanks you guys," Rin said as she took a mouthful.

- "What's going on here?" Haruhi asked with a sigh.

Hikaru and Kaoru: My lord, you had such a small sister?

Tamaki: It's okay. I'll be her oniichama starting today.

Haruhi: Stop saying such irresponsible things!

Rin: A sad pair of siblings indeed.

Haruhi: Next time, "Oniichama is a Prince".

Tamaki: Ouran Highschool Host Club will be waiting for you.