DISCLAIMER: I do not own Hetalia.

Ugh….I hate being sick….so much, but what do I still do when sick? Write for you guys~ haha thankyou so much to everyone who reviews! / I really do appreciate it! Here is an early chapter for you guys~!

Alfred sat in bed, empty. Hollow. If there was a purpose to life anymore…he didn't know what it was. Everything just seemed so wrong. Sleep last night had been terrible, if it even came… With a sigh, the American rolled his cell phone over in his palm again.

What am I expecting? He thought bitterly. For Arthur to text me and say that he is sorry? But what does he even have to apologize for? It's not his fault that…that I love him… and that he… Damnit! Alfred dropped the phone next to him and threw his head down to the pillow to stifle a scream. This sucked! Really, at least Alfred wanted him to text him something that would signify that things would go back to normal, that everything was alright. Something like:

[Why aren't you going to school today, you twit]

Yeah...That would be nice...But that would never happen. Arthur knew why Alfred wasn't going to school today because he was part of the reason. Some of Alfred hoped that he felt bad about it and would think more about how he actually felt about him, but Alfred knew the Englishman had thought about it and… he just didn't feel the same way. The American knew he would have to accept that fact.

"Alfred?" Mom was at the door, knocking to see if she could come in. In that moment Alfred just wanted to be a little kid again so that he could just curl up in her arms and believe all she told him about how everything would be okay. He couldn't do that now though, he was far too big.

"Yeah mom?" He sat up again and watched as his doorknob turned.

"Are you feeling alright sweetie? You missed you bus…" Her concern was clearly visible on her face. Her emotions always so easy to read…Matthew too…There was a sharp pain in Alfred's chest as he thought of his long lost twin. At first…it had been awesome. Alfred had always wanted a twin. But… This wasn't some kind of movie, serious things had happened to the other teen. It made Alfred feel horrible. Really horrible, that because mom had chosen to take him Matthew had to stay with their father-that bastard of a man- and go through such an awful childhood.

"I don't feel very well…" He murmured, trying to play up the cute American 'mommy I'm sick, let me stay home' factor. The woman's brow scrunched and she began walking towards Alfred. She was going to put her hand on his forehead…Would she still make him go to school even if she found out that he didn't have a fever, that he wasn't actually physically sick…? Her cool hands touched his cheeks and forehead.

"You don't feel very hot to me…" She made a face. "You want to stay home?" Alfred nodded sheepishly. "You know, if there is something bothering you, you can tell me." And Alfred did wish that he could tell her everything…But he couldn't. He couldn't just be like. 'Well I told Arthur I loved him and got rejected' because first off, she didn't know he felt that way towards men and second she wouldn't accept it as an excuse for staying home. And then he couldn't tell her that he felt bad about Mattie because then she would feel bad, because honestly…It was more her fault than anyone's.

"It's alright mom, I'm just feeling a bit drained, what with everything going on." That was all he would give her and she knew it, so she smiled at him, kissed his forehead and left his room after saying.

"Alright sweetie…"

Alfred sighed and lay back down on his bed, looking up at the ceiling and letting out a deep sigh. Things will get better…eventually…

Gilbert pulled Matthew down the hallway, his grip on the Canadian's wrist tight. Tight enough to actually hurt the teen… Matthew could feel the emotions rolling off of the other man as he thought of all of the things that Matthew could tell him about the Austrian.

"G-Gil!" Matthew cried when his grip got even tighter as they rounded a corner. Suddenly they were in the stairwell, everyone had gone to their classes…. As he should be… But he was going to tell Gilbert something that he didn't even have the right to tell him… Right….?

The Canadian was snapped out of his thoughts when he was suddenly slammed into a wall. The breath came out of him in a huff, his vision blurring for a moment before his eyes locked onto the Albino. Those blazing ruby eyes seeming to burn into Matthew's indigo.

"Owch!" Matthew touched his hand to his head where he was sure a bump would form later. Ow….The albino's eyes widened slightly and he took a step back, shoving his fists into his pocket.

"What do you want?" Gilbert growled, not meeting Matthew's gaze. Slowly Matthew leaned into the wall, drawing in a deep breath.

"Roderick…" The Canadian swallowed as the others blazing eyes came up again, filled with intense emotions at the mention of his boyfriend's name.

"What about him?" It seemed like he was trying to play this with an attitude that said he didn't really care and just wanted to get it over with, but Matthew could tell that he was nervous about it, that maybe he was anticipating what Matthew was going to say.

"You have to promise that you won't tell anyone."

"Tell me what it is first and maybe I will."

Matthew shook his head slowly with a sigh. Maybe this was a bad choice…but there was really no going back now… and honestly…Gilbert was scaring him…

"No… That's not how it works…."

"I'll show you how it works!" Gilbert began to take a step forward but then seemed to think better of it, and instead took a deep breath as he tried to calm himself.

"Promise?"

There was a short silence.

"Yes."

Matthew drew in a deep breath. He had never done anything like this before…he didn't even know how to begin to tell Gilbert…

"I was walking down the halls during lunch…" Matthew began, watching the other with a careful eye. "And I heard a beautiful song being played on the piano. It was…the most amazing song I had ever heard… so full of emotions." Matthew could hear the dreamlike quality to his voice, Gilbert had also noticed it and was now glaring at him.

"You're not going to tell me that you fell in love with him are you?" He growled. Matthew furiously shook his head.

"No, no…. But that song…" He trailed off, trying to think of how to phrase this next part…

"Yeah, what about it? Roderick is a f*ckin amazing piano player I know that. Go on with the damn story, unless that's it." Matthew shook his head, bringing his eyes up to meet the other teens.

"No…That's not it…Roderick…he wrote this song…"

"Okay, he writes things and they're amazing. I. know." Gilbert was beginning to grow irritable.

"He wrote it for the person he loves." Matthew paused, watching the other's reaction before continuing. "The woman he loves…"

"Are you trying to say that he's cheating on me?" Gilbert snorted.

"...Gil...He is...he...kissed her. i'm sorry..."

Gilberts fists came out of his pocket and a growl escaped from his throat as his blazing eyes tried to burn through Matthew. Emotions swirled through the ruby orbs. Desperate that Matthew was lying about this, angry that Roderick was cheating on him, hurt that the one he loved didn't love his back and had been leading him on, angry again for allowing himself to fall in love with the Austrian, broken, and then angry again. Angry at Matthew for telling him, sad, and then jealous.

"Who's the bitch?" He growled his voice on the verge of cracking with emotion.

"You need to promise not to tell anyone."

"Who. Is. The. Bitch." Gilbert demanded, grinding his teeth together.

"Promise you wont tell!"

Matthew trembled, wishing that he could just disappear into the wall behind him. Gilbert stepped towards him, knotting his fist into the front of Matthew's shirt. Matthew flinched, trying to fight back the panic that was rising in him.

"Fuck that. You'll tell me." Matthew was one again shoved into the wall, raised to his tiptoes by a strength that he didn't know the albino had. "And I'll tell everyone who the fucking boyfriend stealing bitch is!"

I shouldn't have told him…I shouldn't have told him…I'm scared…

"N-no…" Matthew's voice broke. "It would ruin everything for her. You can't be that way… It's… I know that you're hurt… but… pl-please?"

Gilbert was still glaring at him, his whole body shaking as he held Matthew up against the wall. Matthew was terrified. Absolutely terrified of the Albino right now… Even though he looked so angry there was still the pain.

"Fuck!" Gilbert's yell echoed through the stairwell. "I won't fucking tell okay? I…I promise! Just… tell her name…" he began to lower Matthew down on the wall, uncurling his fist from the Canadian's shirt. "I at least have the right to know it…" Matthew paused, looking at the heartbroken teenager in front of him… It was better that he found out now right…? Maybe Matthew had done the wrong thing…

"You should talk to Roderick about—" Gilbert looked at him again, the intensity in his eyes making the Canadian shudder.

"Please…I just want to know her name…" His eyes shifted downwards, his shoulders beginning to shake "I won't tell anyone…I swear…I swear on my awesomeness." Despite the absurdity of that comment Matthew knew that he was being completely serious.

"Elizaveta…." Matthew whispered, half of him hoping that Gilbert wouldn't hear him… But he did and his eyes once again snapped to Matthew's.

"The fucking teacher?" He growled. Matthew nodded. "What the HELL?" Matthews eyes widened as the albino's fist slammed into the wall right next to his face. "AGH!" There were tears in Gilberts eyes and Matthew had the strangest urge to hug the other teen. He just looked so broken…

People must go through things like this a lot…

"Love SUCKS!" Gilbert's knees gave out under him and he fell to the ground, his whole body shaking with silent sobs.

"I know…" Matthew just stood there looking down at him. "It really does…"

Seeming to sense something in the Canadian's words Gilbert looked up at him.

"But it gets better." His voice shook. "It always gets better. It doesn't suck forever, and when you find it…it makes you really happy…really…happy…" The Prussian began to rock. Matthew crouched down beside him and placed a hand in his soft white hair.

Much softer than I thought it would be… Matthew thought as he did something he never thought that he would do…

He actually pulled Gilbert closer to him, wrapping his arms around the crying teen that in turn began to sob harder as he hugged him back. Matthew wanted to tell him that it was okay, that this wasn't the worst thing that would ever happen to him…Matthew knew that worse things could have happened to him… But…he kept that to himself. He felt that any words he said would just make things worse than they already were…

"Gil…" Matthew murmured, running a hand though the soft white hair again. "We should go to class…"

"But…" Gilbert looked up at him with the eyes of a child, pleading with his mother to not put his favorite dog down… "I don't want to go to her class…" Elizaveta was the first class they had… it was true…But they needed to go to class didn't they?

"We can't just skip…"

The albino hugged him tighter.

"Yes we can…" He mumbled.

Matthew sighed. He had never skipped a class before and he didn't really want to start.

"Then let's go to the guidance councilor. Okay?"

Gilbert again shook his head into Matthew's chest.

"I don't wanna."

The thought of the person who had just scared Matthew horribly now sobbing in his arms was odd. Who would have thought that the Prussian could be like this…? He seemed so vulnerable…The Canadian wondered if he would ever see him like this again? The thought almost seemed—

Wait….What was he thinking….? Matthew sighed and continued to stroke the other teen's hair, twirling it around his fingers before letting it go and repeating the process.

"Well where can we go?"

"I dunwanna move…" His words were muffled by Matthew's shoulder.

"Btu we can't stay here…"

"Mnnn…You smell like maple syrup…." Gilbert said dreamily. Was he falling asleep?

"Gil?"

"Mnnn."

Again Matthew sighed and leaned back against the wall. It wasn't a good idea to sleep here, once the classes ended people would be coming down the stairwell… they would have to move before then… The Prussians shaking stopped, and his breath began to even out and Matthew just sat there, running his fingers though his hair. He'd never skipped a class before…but he guessed it was alright to miss at least one…

Arthur felt bad about what had happened with Alfred last night. Really…he felt horrible…but feeling…that's what got him into this mess… He didn't feel the right way… About Alfred. Really it had been quite shocking when the American boy had actually claimed that he loved Arthur…. They had been friends for a while now… but Arthur just…he didn't feel that way…

Maybe he didn't feel that way towards men in general… But…He wasn't attracted to women either…

Maybe he just didn't have those kinds of feelings…

But that was part of being human. And he was human.

Hopefully Alfred wasn't feeling too down…Maybe just one text…

Arthur looked at his phone, sliding it open and beginning to write a message.

[Why aren't you in school today, you twit?]

Even though he knew that he was the answer he couldn't think of anything else to text the other man. He was just about to click send when-

"Arthur are you texting?" The red headed history teacher was looking at him with a pout on his face. Arthur sighed and shut the phone.

"Sorry Mr. Fili…"

"I'm sorry but I'm going to have to take your phone for the day." What? Arthur stared at the Italian. When had be started this? "Ludwig told me that I needed to start being more strict…and I really can't have you texting in school….but I'll give it back to you….I promise!" For some reason the teacher seemed to be shrinking back. Was Arthur glaring at him or something? He did that sometimes…looked like he was glaring when really… he wasn't making an expression at all… Fili put his hand out nervously, waiting for Arthur to put the phone in it. for a moment Arthur contemplated not giving the teacher his phone, but…That wouldn't be respectful.

With a sigh Arthur brought his phone up and placed it in the teacher's hand, receiving an "Oooooo" from some of the students in the class. Really, they were seniors but they acted like children… Happy with himself Fili skipped back up to the front of class and continued his lecture.

As class ended there was a sound in the hallway. Nervously Matthew began to shake the sleeping Prussian.

"Gil! Gil! Wake up!" He hissed, moving away from the albino and standing up. As Gilbert hit the cold floor he began to stir, sitting up and rubbing at his eyes.

"What time is it…?" He yawned, stretching his arms out.

"Time for the next class." Matthew pulled at him arm as some students began to walk down the stairs and noise flooded the hall.

"Right…" Gilbert stood up and yawned again. "Next class…"

The two of them pulled up their bags from the ground and began to exit the stairwells just as students began flooding through. They continued to walk until they got to the hall where they would split up and go to different classes.

"Mattie," Gilbert's face seemed to flush a little.

"Hm?"

"Th—"

"Gilbert, Matthew, where were you two during class today?" Matthew nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard the female voice behind him. Instead of looking at the teacher, Matthew's eyes shot to Gilbert who looked as if he had been struck by a whip.

"S-Sorry Elizaveta…" Matthew began, turning to look at the teacher. "I was in the library with Gilbert asking him some questions about what we did in class when I wasn't there and then I asked him for help with the homework you had assigned us… I wasn't feeling too well, sad I guess because of my dad… And I needed some help focusing and understanding stuff…I guess we just lost track of time…"

Her features had begun to soften at the mention of his dad, pity taking over. It seemed they would let them get away with this one.

"Okay," She began, looking at the two of them. "But don't do that again okay Matthew? Gilbert?"

"Yes M'am." Matthew said, throwing in a sad smile. Gilbert simply nodded, not looking at her.

"Alright well off to class the two of you." She sighed and began to walk away. Gilbert took in a deep breath. Had he been holding his breath while she was there?

"See you Gil…" Matthew began, turning to walk away.

"Hey, Mattie." He looked over his shoulder at Gilbert.

"Yeah?"

"Like I tried to say before she came over, Thank you…for telling me about them."

Matthew smiled.

"You're welcome."

Alright! finally 10 chapters and we are beginning to see the blooming of a relationship! yay~! hahaha sorry if this chapter wasn't as good as you'd hoped...i've been feeling like sh*t...*sigh* but yeah! review for more~ why don't we shoot for 10 more? then i promise i will upload a new chapter Tuesday as well~;b